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(The Week UK)   Mike Tyson used a fake penis and fought while high on coke. Would not confirm he wants to be next Mayor of Toronto   (theweek.co.uk ) divider line
    More: Unlikely, Mike Tyson, Toronto, fake penis, Richard E. Grant, Lennox Lewis, distance runner, University and college admissions, Asafa Powell  
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5896 clicks; posted to Main » on 13 Nov 2013 at 10:04 AM (2 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



45 Comments     (+0 »)
 
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest
 
2013-11-13 10:06:23 AM  
So it was detachable?
 
2013-11-13 10:07:13 AM  
These are like #245 and #246 on the list of the strangest things Mike Tyson has ever done.
 
2013-11-13 10:08:40 AM  
Professional wrestlers were coked off their asses in the 80s and 90s (and probably even through the early 2000s).
 
2013-11-13 10:09:39 AM  
I don't buy a lot of books but this is high on my list..
 
2013-11-13 10:09:41 AM  
..but enough about the '86 Mets
 
2013-11-13 10:10:36 AM  
 
2013-11-13 10:11:58 AM  
Would that be considered a PED in boxing?
 
2013-11-13 10:12:46 AM  
FTA: The revelations come as disgraced cyclist Lance Armstrong embarks on what The Guardian calls a "media offensive", claiming that his lifetime ban for systematically cheating his way to seven Tour de France titles has led to a "massive personal loss of wealth".

Did he expect some sort of award for courage?
 
2013-11-13 10:15:10 AM  
i197.photobucket.com
 
2013-11-13 10:15:25 AM  

Uranus Is Huge!: FTA: The revelations come as disgraced cyclist Lance Armstrong embarks on what The Guardian calls a "media offensive", claiming that his lifetime ban for systematically cheating his way to seven Tour de France titles has led to a "massive personal loss of wealth".

Did he expect some sort of award for courage?


maybe - it takes a lot of courage to have a nut removed just so the tests don't show an overly high amount of testosterone.
 
2013-11-13 10:17:02 AM  
www.gaglolz.com
 
2013-11-13 10:17:34 AM  
Did he borrow one from the Bang Bros.?

[oops.jpg]
 
2013-11-13 10:17:47 AM  
Sounds like Dirk Digler in the second half of Boogie Nights
 
2013-11-13 10:18:06 AM  
Fake Penis

no slashy needed
 
2013-11-13 10:18:32 AM  
"We once had a bachelor party for Brasky. He ate the entire cake, before we could tell him there was a stripper in it."

"To Bill Brasky"

dubsism.files.wordpress.com
 
2013-11-13 10:21:43 AM  
Somehow I read that as "Mike Tyson fought a fake penis while high on coke".
 
2013-11-13 10:22:16 AM  
This is my surprised face. "O".
Yup, surprised as all hell.

"widespread tip of iceberg" is an understatement.
Where do they find these spokespersons, under a mountain range in a place far, far away???
 
2013-11-13 10:23:15 AM  
Remember when everybody did "would you take a million dollars to get punched in the face by Tyson?"
 
2013-11-13 10:25:02 AM  

Mateorocks: These are like #245 and #246 on the list of the strangest things Mike Tyson has ever done.


haha, no kidding. Actually using a fake dick to pass a urine test isn't even all that weird, or using illegal drugs while doing sports. I would just like to take this post to shill for the fantastic Mike Tyson documentary, Tyson.

www.examiner.com
 
2013-11-13 10:25:41 AM  

special20: Uranus Is Huge!: FTA: The revelations come as disgraced cyclist Lance Armstrong embarks on what The Guardian calls a "media offensive", claiming that his lifetime ban for systematically cheating his way to seven Tour de France titles has led to a "massive personal loss of wealth".

Did he expect some sort of award for courage?

maybe - it takes a lot of courage to have a nut removed just so the tests don't show an overly high amount of testosterone.


There was only one of two things that they could have done, the fist was to give him a medal for being so brave and honest, which wasn't very likely...

/obscure?  I guess not this time of year at least.
 
2013-11-13 10:32:11 AM  
Come now, Subby. Mikey might be a bit wild but he isn't crazy enough to be Mayor of Toronto. New York City, maybe, but not Toronto. Toronto has always been obsessed with out-New Yorking New York.

Besides, 901 Tories are just getting reconciled to their Mayor being a bully, drunk, meth-head who parties with Fynch Corridor slum tenement thugs. Chris Farley on meth, yes, but they're not ready for a black Mayor yet.

Now you can understand why Chocolate City, DC, reelected Mayor Barry despite the crack 'ho's and corruption. Ford's campaign music for the next election is: "Stand by your man". STAND BY YOUR MAN. But only because Hilary Clinton isn't running. She has the US copyright on that tune.

Dance with the lump what brought you. He doesn't have to represent your values or the content of your character as long as he represents the contents of your wallet or purse. There is no God but Mammon and the GOP/Tories are his profits.
 
2013-11-13 10:39:19 AM  

machoprogrammer: Professional wrestlers were coked off their asses in the 80s and 90s (and probably even through the early 2000s).


Like any other actors in the entertainment industry?
 
2013-11-13 10:41:21 AM  

brantgoose: Come now, Subby. Mikey might be a bit wild but he isn't crazy enough to be Mayor of Toronto. New York City, maybe, but not Toronto. Toronto has always been obsessed with out-New Yorking New York.

Besides, 901 Tories are just getting reconciled to their Mayor being a bully, drunk, meth-head who parties with Fynch Corridor slum tenement thugs. Chris Farley on meth, yes, but they're not ready for a black Mayor yet.

Now you can understand why Chocolate City, DC, reelected Mayor Barry despite the crack 'ho's and corruption. Ford's campaign music for the next election is: "Stand by your man". STAND BY YOUR MAN. But only because Hilary Clinton isn't running. She has the US copyright on that tune.

Dance with the lump what brought you. He doesn't have to represent your values or the content of your character as long as he represents the contents of your wallet or purse. There is no God but Mammon and the GOP/Tories are his profits.


dude.... this isn't the politics tab....
we're talking about fake penises & Rob Ford...

there's a visual
 
2013-11-13 10:44:56 AM  
I'm going to go with:

So?

Seriously, who cares?
 
2013-11-13 10:48:53 AM  

dv-ous: Would that be considered a PED in boxing?


It's not his bag, baby!
 
2013-11-13 10:50:34 AM  
Why did he need a fake penis to fight on coke? Was it a cock fight?
 
2013-11-13 10:52:24 AM  
This is ludacrith.
 
2013-11-13 10:52:41 AM  
He's just trying to excuse losing to Buster Douglas like a chump.
 
2013-11-13 10:54:36 AM  

machoprogrammer: Professional wrestlers were coked off their asses in the 80s and 90s (and probably even through the early 2000s).


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aZcykZBZKJw
 
2013-11-13 11:01:34 AM  

Mateorocks: These are like #245 and #246 on the list of the strangest things Mike Tyson has ever done.


This. I like Mike, because he is totally insane
 
2013-11-13 11:26:49 AM  

SpdrJay: Why did he need a fake penis to fight on coke? Was it a cock fight?


My question has now been asked and answered.
 
2013-11-13 12:18:37 PM  
And don't forget to trot out the phrase "convicted rapist" when discussing Tyson. No seriously, it's in the style guide, you have to use it. Never mind that he almost certainly didn't do it, just print it. BLACK MAN BAD MAN.
 
2013-11-13 12:33:29 PM  
That's nothing. I used fake coke and fought while high on penis.
 
2013-11-13 01:09:32 PM  

StrikitRich: Sounds like Dirk Digler in the second half of Boogie Nights


I spotted a car in Barrie Ontario a few weeks ago with a DDIGGLER licience plate. Got a crappy pic of it with my phone LOL.
 
2013-11-13 01:10:12 PM  

dv-ous: Would that be considered a PED in boxing?


Ever see someone in a coke-rage?
 
2013-11-13 01:12:25 PM  
DNRTFA

Would rather start discussion of how Mike might have used said fake penis:

1. Ergonomically designed drink stir?
 
2013-11-13 01:16:04 PM  

TheGogmagog: special20: Uranus Is Huge!: FTA: The revelations come as disgraced cyclist Lance Armstrong embarks on what The Guardian calls a "media offensive", claiming that his lifetime ban for systematically cheating his way to seven Tour de France titles has led to a "massive personal loss of wealth".

Did he expect some sort of award for courage?

maybe - it takes a lot of courage to have a nut removed just so the tests don't show an overly high amount of testosterone.

There was only one of two things that they could have done, the fist was to give him a medal for being so brave and honest, which wasn't very likely...

/obscure?  I guess not this time of year at least.


There's nothing obscure about Simon and Garfunkel's "The Boxer"
 
2013-11-13 01:18:10 PM  
So did Liberace.
 
2013-11-13 01:21:13 PM  
He just doesn't know when to shut up.

Here come the Lance Armstrong style law suits.
 
2013-11-13 02:22:09 PM  

Flakeloaf: And don't forget to trot out the phrase "convicted rapist" when discussing Tyson. No seriously, it's in the style guide, you have to use it. Never mind that he almost certainly didn't do it, just print it. BLACK MAN BAD MAN.


-3/10
 
2013-11-13 02:51:40 PM  

Khazar-Khum: Flakeloaf: And don't forget to trot out the phrase "convicted rapist" when discussing Tyson. No seriously, it's in the style guide, you have to use it. Never mind that he almost certainly didn't do it, just print it. BLACK MAN BAD MAN.

-3/10


What part, exactly? The part where he didn't rape her, the part where he was convicted anyway because the crazy attractive and successful punchman must be guilty, or the part where the press never spare any excuse to call him that?

I won't pretend Tyson's a saint - he's a violent, unbalanced egotistical misogynist drug addict - but with everything else that's gone on in the guy's life he has no reason to lie so consistently about this. Especially since the evidence casts a very long shadow of doubt over her complaint.
 
2013-11-13 05:03:04 PM  
He apparently was totally high on coke during the filming of Hangover. You can google for it, it's really funny.
 
2013-11-13 06:09:09 PM  

cryinoutloud: Actually using a fake dick to pass a urine test isn't even all that weird, or using illegal drugs while doing sports.


Maradona says:

1.bp.blogspot.com

DON'T DO DRUGS!!!

 
2013-11-13 06:12:49 PM  

iron de havilland: cryinoutloud: Actually using a fake dick to pass a urine test isn't even all that weird, or using illegal drugs while doing sports.

Maradona says:

[1.bp.blogspot.com image 639x400]

DON'T DO DRUGS!!!


A neuron just fired in the back of my mind, and a Google search for "Maradona fake penis" reveals:

Argentinian police are searching for a fake penis used by Diego Maradona to beat drug tests while playing for Napoli in Italy. The fake plastic manhood was filled with 'clean' urine to make sure the footballer's sample was acceptable.

The plastic piece was given to a museum in Buenos Aires but disappeared on a countrywide tour.


So, it's more likely than you think.
 
2013-11-13 07:14:40 PM  
Must be awesome to be famous. You can do shiat and people care.
 
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