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(Examiner)   What would you do if you bought a desk on Craigslist and found $98,000 tucked behind the drawers of the desk two months later? This Rabbi returned the money to the grateful owner - who forgot she put the money there   (examiner.com) divider line 89
    More: Interesting, Craigslist, Jewish day school, rabbis  
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3339 clicks; posted to Main » on 12 Nov 2013 at 9:53 AM (23 weeks ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2013-11-12 09:24:41 AM
But he charged her interest.

I keed, I keed.
 
2013-11-12 09:38:05 AM
So, let me get this straight:

1.  You have $98,000
2.  It's such a pittance to you that you forgot where you put it, yet
3.  You're selling an old desk on craigslist

does not compute.
 
2013-11-12 09:55:09 AM
Too bad there's not a HERO tag, subby.
 
2013-11-12 09:55:18 AM

nekom: So, let me get this straight:

1.  You have $98,000
2.  It's such a pittance to you that you forgot where you put it, yet
3.  You're selling an old desk on craigslist

does not compute.


You don't get rich by giving old desks away.
 
2013-11-12 09:55:29 AM
Damn, if I had $98 in cash, I'd know exactly where it was at all times.  I can't imagine having $98k.  Farking first world, rich people problem.
 
2013-11-12 09:55:44 AM
I'd return the $48,000 I found.
 
2013-11-12 10:00:50 AM

Damn, I get excited if I find a ten spot in my winter coat.



/found a bag of dank once in a pair of used jeans I bought at a thrift store
//I did not attempt to find the owner
 
2013-11-12 10:00:56 AM
I'd assume the old lady was the relative of mobsters and return the money.  Thinking about, a script where a guy buys a desk with $100k stuffed in a hidden compartment from an old aunt of a mob boss who then hires someone to break in an retrieve it quietly but gets killed by the homeowner setting off a desperate battle of life and death between one man and the mob would make a terrible idea.  Never mind.
 
2013-11-12 10:01:35 AM
Oh look, it's the old lost/mislaid/misplaced/treasure trove question from first year Property.
 
2013-11-12 10:02:53 AM

Marshall Willenholly: Damn, if I had $98 in cash, I'd know exactly where it was at all times.  I can't imagine having $98k.  Farking first world, rich people problem.


Except, the opposite of that.  Having your entire life savings in a desk hidden away is a 3rd world, poor person thing.
 
2013-11-12 10:04:56 AM
I'd pay off my house -- slowly, quietly, and under the radar.  Because I pretty much owe exactly that amount (98k)


If you have so much money, you forget where you put 98K in cash...  sorry, I just wouldn't feel too bad.
 
2013-11-12 10:06:18 AM
I'd have to say I'd return it. I consider myself more honest than most of the population and not a thief at all, but 98K is not worth wondering when this person (possibly a criminal) is going to come looking for their $$$
 
2013-11-12 10:07:45 AM

Mugato: But he charged her interest.

I keed, I keed.


Actually Talmud may have a discussion about the costs involved in returning property -- that it is rightful to ask for real expenses incurred.

For Farkers that would be more like finding 20 kilos of cocaine that just fell off a truck. Storage costs, license plate search, bribes, protection -- all legitimate expenses.  Payoff to Examiner's sources (every other paper and website in existence) to leave your name out of the story.
 
2013-11-12 10:08:42 AM
Why do people think that the person who had the money is rich?  Rich people don't stash money in their house; poor people do.  Rich people put their money in investments, not in old desks.
 
2013-11-12 10:10:50 AM
I'm just counting days until "returning found money" becomes "capital gains on the finder, gift tax on the returnee"...
 
KIA
2013-11-12 10:13:52 AM
She was "speechless"???  Really???  Taking a moment to make up an explanation of how the fark she "forgot" about $98,000.00 seems more likely.

The Rabbi seems to be a good man, but maybe he shoulda given her a quiz like "Hey, I found some money in the desk.  Do you remember how much you might have left there?"  If she got the answer right, then okay, return the money.

/ Hindsight is always 20/20
 
2013-11-12 10:14:36 AM

meanmutton: Why do people think that the person who had the money is rich?  Rich people don't stash money in their house; poor people do.  Rich people put their money in investments, not in old desks.


We assume they are rich not because they stashed the money, but because they forgot about the money.   I make 35-40k a year... I don't even forget about the $5 dollar bill I get as change when I buy something at the quickie mart, the only way it seems logical for a person to forget about this amount of money is if they have a LOT more elsewhere (that they actually remember)

You aren't too bright to stash any large amount of money in your house like this... hell bury it, at least then if your house burns down the money won't vaporize.


Also: i refer you to the age old case of finders vs keepers:
upload.wikimedia.org
 
2013-11-12 10:15:09 AM
Whatever keeps your Saturdays from being awkward.
 
2013-11-12 10:16:12 AM
Buy a new Corvette.

/No conscience.
 
2013-11-12 10:16:39 AM
Of course he returned the money. He's kosher: he has to answer to a Higher Authority. [cue thunder & lightning]

Me, I'd deduct a finder's fee: 5% of that would be a fortune on my budget. Dentures and a new hearing aid. Imagine, I might post to Fark a lot less!
 
2013-11-12 10:17:44 AM
4.bp.blogspot.com
 
2013-11-12 10:18:28 AM
I'd return it. Not because I'm honest but I'd figure at some point someone would come looking for it, that's a crime family amount of money.
 
2013-11-12 10:19:51 AM
If law enforcement catches you with a pile of cash, they confiscate it until you can prove it's yours.

AND prove that you've paid taxes on it.
 
2013-11-12 10:20:02 AM
Mitvah is a good deed.
 
2013-11-12 10:22:38 AM
Yeah, I don't know that I'd return it. Judge me if you like, but the reality is this: if the desk had termites and was bought "as is", I would not have any renumeration available to me, despite termites not being advertised as included in the desk. Ergo, I have every right to that money.

Granted, it would likely depend on the visible circumstances of the woman i bought the desk from. Did I get it at a mansion? If so, the money's mine. However, if I'm getting it from a lower-middle income area, and there's signs that this woman isn't exactly swimming in cash, it's more likely I'm going to give it back.

Honestly, it probably depends on my mood, because 98K, tax-free (I'm sure as fark not reporting that) would make a HUGE difference in my life.
 
2013-11-12 10:25:30 AM
Hey isn't that the same amount JonBenet's kidnappers were asking for?
 
2013-11-12 10:29:58 AM

Sillygoth: Yeah, I don't know that I'd return it. Judge me if you like, but the reality is this: if the desk had termites and was bought "as is", I would not have any renumeration available to me, despite termites not being advertised as included in the desk. Ergo, I have every right to that money.

Granted, it would likely depend on the visible circumstances of the woman i bought the desk from. Did I get it at a mansion? If so, the money's mine. However, if I'm getting it from a lower-middle income area, and there's signs that this woman isn't exactly swimming in cash, it's more likely I'm going to give it back.

Honestly, it probably depends on my mood, because 98K, tax-free (I'm sure as fark not reporting that) would make a HUGE difference in my life.



I'd like to think that in any case I would choose to give it back, and then regret it for years, but this is probably what I would do too.
 
2013-11-12 10:30:10 AM
I'd have returned the $9,800.00 dollars.
 
2013-11-12 10:31:59 AM

meanmutton: Why do people think that the person who had the money is rich?  Rich people don't stash money in their house; poor people do.  Rich people put their money in investments, not in old desks.


Um. Excuse me. Having $97,950 more than I do sounds pretty rich to me. She might have squirreled it away a little at a time over umpteen years but it did add up to considerable wealth. For far less than $98k I could get dental implants, not just dentures, with some Botox & liposuction to boot, and have a buck or two left over to pick up a few bar tabs. Imagine an alternate universe where I'm too busy dating & mating to fark around online. (Wouldn't that compensate for a bearded Spock?)

Meanwhile they've cut my SNAP (formerly known as Food Stamps) quite a bit because the Republicans hate poor crazy old folks even when they're not lifelong commies. To them I should be locked in a tenement garret subsisting on gruel, at best.

O Fate, I shaketh my wee fist at thee!!!
 
2013-11-12 10:32:08 AM

vernonFL: Mitvah is a good deed.


I was wondering how far I'd have to scroll down before I found that word. I think the Rabbi was just worried his future relatives would get shiat on by God if he didn't return it.
 
2013-11-12 10:32:51 AM

meanmutton: Why do people think that the person who had the money is rich?  Rich people don't stash money in their house; poor people do.  Rich people put their money in investments, not in old desks.


Old desk? She bought it from Staples and put together herself.

/In the article.
 
2013-11-12 10:34:53 AM
KIA:

The Rabbi seems to be a good man, but maybe he shoulda given her a quiz like "Hey, I found some money in the desk.  Do you remember how much you might have left there?"  If she got the answer right, then okay, return the money.

What if she'd said an even $100k? Should he give her an additional two grand?

By the way, I was told there'd be no math. Math is hard!
 
2013-11-12 10:35:06 AM
What a dumb ass
 
2013-11-12 10:36:28 AM

accelerus: meanmutton: Why do people think that the person who had the money is rich?  Rich people don't stash money in their house; poor people do.  Rich people put their money in investments, not in old desks.

We assume they are rich not because they stashed the money, but because they forgot about the money.   I make 35-40k a year... I don't even forget about the $5 dollar bill I get as change when I buy something at the quickie mart, the only way it seems logical for a person to forget about this amount of money is if they have a LOT more elsewhere (that they actually remember)

You aren't too bright to stash any large amount of money in your house like this... hell bury it, at least then if your house burns down the money won't vaporize.


Also: i refer you to the age old case of finders vs keepers:
[upload.wikimedia.org image 250x182]


She forgot where she stashed the money, not that she had the money.  She quickly recognized it as having been her inheritance.

Also, where do people get the "finders/keepers" thing from?  Who thinks it's okay to steal from people simply because they misplaced it?
 
2013-11-12 10:37:30 AM

vbob: If law enforcement catches you with a pile of cash, they confiscate it until you can prove it's yours.

AND prove that you've paid taxes on it.


Not in the US.  They have to prove that you gained it illegally in order to keep it.
 
2013-11-12 10:37:50 AM
$40k into the house for a basement and a deck, $30k into the mortgage, $6k x 3 into college funds, $10k into the emergency fund.

Or possibly upgrade my commuting car that just hit 100k miles instead of paying down the mortgage, cause at 3.25% it's not a huge rush to pay that down.  Just roll what would be the car payment into extra principal.
 
2013-11-12 10:38:03 AM
Did she at least give him back the money he paid for the desk as a thank you?
 
2013-11-12 10:39:31 AM

The One True TheDavid: meanmutton: Why do people think that the person who had the money is rich?  Rich people don't stash money in their house; poor people do.  Rich people put their money in investments, not in old desks.

Um. Excuse me. Having $97,950 more than I do sounds pretty rich to me. She might have squirreled it away a little at a time over umpteen years but it did add up to considerable wealth. For far less than $98k I could get dental implants, not just dentures, with some Botox & liposuction to boot, and have a buck or two left over to pick up a few bar tabs. Imagine an alternate universe where I'm too busy dating & mating to fark around online. (Wouldn't that compensate for a bearded Spock?)

Meanwhile they've cut my SNAP (formerly known as Food Stamps) quite a bit because the Republicans hate poor crazy old folks even when they're not lifelong commies. To them I should be locked in a tenement garret subsisting on gruel, at best.

O Fate, I shaketh my wee fist at thee!!!


You're not exactly the poster child for why people should be getting more handouts from the government.
 
2013-11-12 10:40:49 AM
Money? What money? No money here! Remember possession is 98% of the law, and that's one law I believe in.
 
2013-11-12 10:45:03 AM

meanmutton: vbob: If law enforcement catches you with a pile of cash, they confiscate it until you can prove it's yours.

AND prove that you've paid taxes on it.

Not in the US.  They have to prove that you gained it illegally in order to keep it.


Yeah like I would tell anyone!!!       Anyway they cut everyones snap stamps
 
2013-11-12 10:45:26 AM

accelerus: meanmutton: Why do people think that the person who had the money is rich?  Rich people don't stash money in their house; poor people do.  Rich people put their money in investments, not in old desks.

We assume they are rich not because they stashed the money, but because they forgot about the money.   I make 35-40k a year... I don't even forget about the $5 dollar bill I get as change when I buy something at the quickie mart, the only way it seems logical for a person to forget about this amount of money is if they have a LOT more elsewhere (that they actually remember)

You aren't too bright to stash any large amount of money in your house like this... hell bury it, at least then if your house burns down the money won't vaporize.


Also: i refer you to the age old case of finders vs keepers:


I hope you're not salaried. Because you "make 35-40k" a year but "don't forget about the $5 dollar bill I get as change" ... Apparently you forgot the $5,000 that may or may not be part of your income.

;)
 
2013-11-12 10:46:19 AM
Further insight... anyone worried about someone coming back after the guy who bought the desk (due to it possibly being crime family money) Remember: it's craigslist,  even if the lady or someone else remembered they stashed 100K in the desk, how exactly would they track down the purchaser?

Unless the guy bought the desk with a check or credit card (it's CL -- lets be honest we all know he bought it with cash, and didn't give her any personal information)

Fact of the matter is he could have kept the money with ZERO negative consequences other than his self imposed moral ones. Keep the money safe only spend a little her and there on regular things.

Again, I'd start making extra payments on my house (make small 500 dollar deposits twice a month at the bank that fly under the radar, or buy money orders at random places and then deposit them, since even these days regular deposits of cash can raise suspicions...

Yup, pay off the house or depending on how my appointment goes at the gastroenterologist later today use it to pay medical bills.
 
2013-11-12 10:47:56 AM

The One True TheDavid: meanmutton: Why do people think that the person who had the money is rich?  Rich people don't stash money in their house; poor people do.  Rich people put their money in investments, not in old desks.

Um. Excuse me. Having $97,950 more than I do sounds pretty rich to me. She might have squirreled it away a little at a time over umpteen years but it did add up to considerable wealth. For far less than $98k I could get dental implants, not just dentures, with some Botox & liposuction to boot, and have a buck or two left over to pick up a few bar tabs. Imagine an alternate universe where I'm too busy dating & mating to fark around online. (Wouldn't that compensate for a bearded Spock?)

Meanwhile they've cut my SNAP (formerly known as Food Stamps) quite a bit because the Republicans hate poor crazy old folks even when they're not lifelong commies. To them I should be locked in a tenement garret subsisting on gruel, at best.

O Fate, I shaketh my wee fist at thee!!!


98,000 dollars is not being poor, come back to reality
 
2013-11-12 10:48:36 AM
Either way, I wouldn't want it on the news.  To my mind, the IRS has no reason to know how much cash I have. I'm sure they will think differently about it.
 
2013-11-12 10:50:05 AM

meanmutton: The One True TheDavid: meanmutton: Why do people think that the person who had the money is rich?  Rich people don't stash money in their house; poor people do.  Rich people put their money in investments, not in old desks.

Um. Excuse me. Having $97,950 more than I do sounds pretty rich to me. She might have squirreled it away a little at a time over umpteen years but it did add up to considerable wealth. For far less than $98k I could get dental implants, not just dentures, with some Botox & liposuction to boot, and have a buck or two left over to pick up a few bar tabs. Imagine an alternate universe where I'm too busy dating & mating to fark around online. (Wouldn't that compensate for a bearded Spock?)

Meanwhile they've cut my SNAP (formerly known as Food Stamps) quite a bit because the Republicans hate poor crazy old folks even when they're not lifelong commies. To them I should be locked in a tenement garret subsisting on gruel, at best.

O Fate, I shaketh my wee fist at thee!!!

You're not exactly the poster child for why people should be getting more handouts from the government.


What kind of hand outs do you get?! Must be nice.
 
2013-11-12 10:50:37 AM
i would keep the money and then immediately get rid of the desk.  that way if she calls me in a panic three months later asking about the money, i can act all surprised and say "oh no i threw the desk away!" and she could even come to my house and see i don't have it anymore.  sorry, but $98,000 is just too much money, that's my salary for about three years.

the money would get hidden inside my couch.  and then in a couple years i would forget all about it and sell the couch to somebody on craiglist, and the cycle would repeat itself.
 
2013-11-12 10:58:08 AM

BitwiseShift: Mugato: But he charged her interest.

I keed, I keed.

Actually Talmud may have a discussion about the costs involved in returning property -- that it is rightful to ask for real expenses incurred.

For Farkers that would be more like finding 20 kilos of cocaine that just fell off a truck. Storage costs, license plate search, bribes, protection -- all legitimate expenses.  Payoff to Examiner's sources (every other paper and website in existence) to leave your name out of the story.


Actually, the Talmud requires that a Gentile's lost property be returned if not doing so will cause people to hate Jews. Otherwise it is forbidden to do so. Fortunately, Jews obey that ruling about as well as we obey the one about visualizing rabbis while we have sex or putting on the right shoe but tying the left shoelaces first which is to say not at all.
 
2013-11-12 11:00:49 AM
A teacher at a private school, I can see why he wouldn't need the money.
 
2013-11-12 11:06:54 AM

The One True TheDavid: Um. Excuse me. Having $97,950 more than I do sounds pretty rich to me. She might have squirreled it away a little at a time over umpteen years but it did add up to considerable wealth. For far less than $98k I could get dental implants, not just dentures, with some Botox & liposuction to boot, and have a buck or two left over to pick up a few bar tabs.


Hold on, I think I spotted the reason you're not rich.
 
2013-11-12 11:08:47 AM

nekom: does not compute.


Alzheimer's  is a helluva disease. My uncle-in-name-only took our great Aunt for more than 10k and she had no memory of it, but then she was living in her 30s again in her mind by that point. You could talk to her for 20 minutes and then she'd look at you in a way you knew she had no idea who you were. Helluva disease, scares the fark outta me...

/old people often also sew money into clothing.. always check the winter coats for extra lining
 
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