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(Huffington Post)   Who among us has not been so drunk that they used a cheeseburger as a sandal after having sex in Waffle House?   (huffingtonpost.com ) divider line
    More: Dumbass, Georgia Waffle House, parking lots, Lowry, cheeseburgers  
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6279 clicks; posted to Main » on 08 Nov 2013 at 1:30 PM (2 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



63 Comments     (+0 »)
 
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest


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2013-11-08 12:42:54 PM  
Waffle House is truly a magical place.
 
2013-11-08 01:05:18 PM  
If I had a dime.....
 
2013-11-08 01:08:43 PM  
I'm just surprised this wasn't about Rob Ford. Because I'm sure he has been that drunk.
 
2013-11-08 01:31:33 PM  
Headline sounds like a weird mix of Mad Libs and Never Have I Ever.
 
2013-11-08 01:32:06 PM  

Walker: If I had a dime.....


But, if you accidentally have sex with a goat ONE TIME......
 
2013-11-08 01:32:52 PM  
"When the female finally got dressed she attempted to put a cheeseburger on her foot as if it were a sandal"

i.imgur.com
 
2013-11-08 01:32:58 PM  
I can neither confirm nor deny I have no comment.
 
2013-11-08 01:33:26 PM  
So that's why people go to waffle house!
 
2013-11-08 01:34:37 PM  
shut up!
 
2013-11-08 01:35:49 PM  
Looks comfy

ecx.images-amazon.com
 
2013-11-08 01:36:47 PM  
Cheeseburger Cheeseburger  Cheeseburger  Cheeseburger  Cheeseburger  Cheeseburger  Cheeseburger  Cheeseburger  Cheeseburger

s13.postimg.org

Pepsi no Coke.
 
2013-11-08 01:37:49 PM  
Where did the cheeseburger come from??
 
2013-11-08 01:37:51 PM  
Ay, chihuahua.
 
2013-11-08 01:37:55 PM  
Sometimes I want to go on ride alongs with the fuzz.
 
2013-11-08 01:38:25 PM  
Ok, I'm picturing a drunken skank trying to put a cheeseburger on her foot like a shoe and I'm laughing my ass off.
 
2013-11-08 01:38:35 PM  

serpent_sky: I'm just surprised this wasn't about Rob Ford. Because I'm sure he has been that drunk.


I was going to say, "Put your hand down, Mayor Ford, they're not taking drink orders."
 
2013-11-08 01:39:43 PM  
The guy had an order of onion rings on his penis.
 
2013-11-08 01:40:34 PM  
2.bp.blogspot.com
 
2013-11-08 01:40:39 PM  
When I was 18 someone took my keys once when I seemed too drunk and I didn't remember/realize. So when it was time to go home, I got in the drivers seat, fished through my pockets looking for the keys and eventually pulled out a lighter, and started lighting a flame by the ignition assuming that this was how to start a car. And everyone pointed and laughed, and I stayed and continued to drink. A couple of hours later they were so annoyed by me that they gave the keys back.
 
2013-11-08 01:40:53 PM  
Man...Dave Matthews has really let himself go.
 
2013-11-08 01:42:02 PM  
Before clicking on link, I read the headline as "Who among us has not been so drunk that they used a cheeseburger as a sandal after having sex in White House".

Ironically enough, the ad in the sidebar featured an image of Former President Clinton.  Coincidence?

/"I did not. Have. Sex. With that cheeseburger, Waffle House."
 
2013-11-08 01:42:50 PM  
I
 
2013-11-08 01:42:55 PM  
I think i saw that commercial but it was Jack-in-the-Box, not WaffleHouse.
 
2013-11-08 01:43:43 PM  
I've been pretty lit up, but I've never done that. That I recall, anyway.

I have been awakened from under a booth at 5am in a KFC and told to take my 1/4 bottle of mescal and the family size bucket of chicken with one piece missing and get the hell out before the breakfast crowd starts showing up or they'll call the cops. In hindsight... that was apparently a very tolerant night crew.
 
2013-11-08 01:44:07 PM  
Go home Mayor of Toronto, you're drunk
 
2013-11-08 01:44:11 PM  
That's nothing.  I once got busy in a Burger King bathroom.
 
2013-11-08 01:44:13 PM  
"Takin' it to the next level, bro"
 
2013-11-08 01:44:39 PM  
Dear Penthouse;

I never thought this would happen to me, last week at the waffle house I was wearing my sexiest royale with cheese...
 
2013-11-08 01:45:51 PM  

Milk D: Man...Dave Matthews has really let himself go.


I disagree, he's still breathing.
 
2013-11-08 01:50:51 PM  

Dow Jones and the Temple of Doom: Where did the cheeseburger come from??


Like all other cheeseburgers; it came from heaven.

/ excepting "burgers" from McDonalds
 
2013-11-08 01:53:56 PM  

Cheron: Dear Penthouse;

I never thought this would happen to me, last week at the waffle house I was wearing my sexiest royale with cheese...


FTFY
 
2013-11-08 01:54:13 PM  

iheartscotch: Dow Jones and the Temple of Doom: Where did the cheeseburger come from??

Like all other cheeseburgers; it came from heaven.

/ excepting "burgers" from McDonalds


Those come from hell?

McSatan.
 
2013-11-08 01:54:28 PM  
This Waffle House place we keep hearing about sounds very... interesting. I must see what it's all about.
 
2013-11-08 01:55:07 PM  
www.sureiscute.com
 
2013-11-08 01:56:10 PM  
And that Polish sausage the guy told the lady he wanted to share with her? It was his penis.
 
2013-11-08 01:56:25 PM  

CleanAndPure: iheartscotch: Dow Jones and the Temple of Doom: Where did the cheeseburger come from??

Like all other cheeseburgers; it came from heaven.

/ excepting "burgers" from McDonalds

Those come from hell?

McSatan.


Worse; New Jersey.


/ I keed
 
2013-11-08 02:05:50 PM  
My Waffle House story:

When I lived in San Diego I went clubbing with a friend from work and got *hammered*.  So we went to WH for coffee. It was full of drunk people such as myself.  We listed over to our table and sat, and the waiter appeared.  He immediately began screaming at us:  "WHAT HAPPENED TO THE DOLLAR ON THE TABLE?  YOU GUYS STOLE THE DOLLAR THAT WAS MY TIP!!!"

I just wanted coffee, so I said "Man, I swear we didn't take your tip...but I'll gladly give you a dollar."  I offered him the dollar.

He snatched the dollar from my hand and *threw* it back in my face with a resounding "FARK YOU, I DON'T WANT YOUR FARKIN' DOLLAR!!!"

Before I knew it my drunk pal from work (6'5", 250lbs) jumped up and chased after the guy, screaming "DORK!!! COME BACK HERE DORK!!!"

The place got deathly quiet.  I decided to ease out...all the while I could hear my friend screaming "COME BACK HERE DORK!!!"

I went into an alley and sat on someone's steps and passed out.  Woke up several hours later and went home.

/good times
 
2013-11-08 02:07:47 PM  
o1.aolcdn.com
 
2013-11-08 02:07:54 PM  

blatz514: [www.sureiscute.com image 540x373]


Thank you. That was the only reason I came into the thread.
 
2013-11-08 02:08:40 PM  

ristst: My Waffle House story:

When I lived in San Diego I went clubbing with a friend from work and got *hammered*.  So we went to WH for coffee. It was full of drunk people such as myself.  We listed over to our table and sat, and the waiter appeared.  He immediately began screaming at us:  "WHAT HAPPENED TO THE DOLLAR ON THE TABLE?  YOU GUYS STOLE THE DOLLAR THAT WAS MY TIP!!!"

I just wanted coffee, so I said "Man, I swear we didn't take your tip...but I'll gladly give you a dollar."  I offered him the dollar.

He snatched the dollar from my hand and *threw* it back in my face with a resounding "FARK YOU, I DON'T WANT YOUR FARKIN' DOLLAR!!!"

Before I knew it my drunk pal from work (6'5", 250lbs) jumped up and chased after the guy, screaming "DORK!!! COME BACK HERE DORK!!!"

The place got deathly quiet.  I decided to ease out...all the while I could hear my friend screaming "COME BACK HERE DORK!!!"

I went into an alley and sat on someone's steps and passed out.  Woke up several hours later and went home.

/good times


It sounds like that story has been edited for television. When your friend said dork was it suddenly a different person's voice, and did his lips look like they were saying dick?
 
2013-11-08 02:09:26 PM  

ChipNASA: [2.bp.blogspot.com image 320x264]


And I'm leaving satisfied.
 
2013-11-08 02:10:26 PM  
I hate when that happens!

The cheeseburger part.
 
2013-11-08 02:11:58 PM  

lamric: [o1.aolcdn.com image 850x637]


So I guess update the posters? Last seen at Waffle House using burgers as post-coital footwear
 
2013-11-08 02:14:19 PM  
I'm impressed, when that drunk I doubt I could perform under normal circumstances, much less in a Waffle House bathroom.
 
2013-11-08 02:26:25 PM  
Me. I have not done that thing. Hell, I've never even been in a Waffle House.

/I saw one from the freeway once...
 
2013-11-08 02:27:52 PM  

you are a puppet: It sounds like that story has been edited for television. When your friend said dork was it suddenly a different person's voice, and did his lips look like they were saying dick?


Nope....as toasted as I was, I recall vividly that guy screaming in his inimitable voice, "COME BACK HERE DORK!!!"

He chased the waiter into the kitchen as I was gettin' the hell outta there, *fast*.  Last thing I needed then was a Q&A session with Johnny Law.
 
2013-11-08 02:35:32 PM  

you are a puppet: It sounds like that story has been edited for television. When your friend said dork was it suddenly a different person's voice, and did his lips look like they were saying dick?


A drunk guy yelling DORK at someone over and over is actually far more hilarious. Edited or not, I like this version better.  DORK! DORK! DORK! It's just perfect.
 
2013-11-08 02:38:51 PM  

serpent_sky: you are a puppet: It sounds like that story has been edited for television. When your friend said dork was it suddenly a different person's voice, and did his lips look like they were saying dick?

A drunk guy yelling DORK at someone over and over is actually far more hilarious. Edited or not, I like this version better.  DORK! DORK! DORK! It's just perfect.


images.wikia.com

BORK! BORK! BORK!
 
2013-11-08 02:48:04 PM  
Were his hash browns smothered?
 
2013-11-08 02:53:48 PM  

shintochick: Were his hash browns smothered?


no, but she was scattered, smothered, covered, topped, and stuffed.  I guess they can now add "knackered" as an option.
 
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