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(Time)   Ten movie sequels that thankfully never happened. Could you imagine the awfulness that would have been a Speed Racer 2?   (entertainment.time.com ) divider line
    More: Spiffy, Lemony Snicket, Emily Browning, sequels, Philip Pullman, ranges, Orson Scott Card, Russell Crowe, Jim Carrey  
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9592 clicks; posted to Entertainment » on 07 Nov 2013 at 11:43 AM (2 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



161 Comments     (+0 »)
 
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2013-11-07 11:45:07 AM  
List fails without Highlander 2.
 
2013-11-07 11:45:27 AM  
Yet.
 
2013-11-07 11:45:42 AM  
Yes. How horrible would that be.
A colorful fun movie for children that had incredible visuals and a self-deprecating sense of humor.

/Saw part VII please.
 
2013-11-07 11:46:06 AM  
Yeah but Susan Sarandon and Christina Ricci...

\untapped potential so to speak
 
2013-11-07 11:46:21 AM  
There was already the first Speed Racer movie. That's bad enough.

/quit Americanizing Japanese stuff hollywood!
 
2013-11-07 11:47:44 AM  
The Golden Compass was the first movie I've ever walked out of.

Superman Returns was the first movie I've ever fallen asleep in.
 
2013-11-07 11:48:31 AM  
www.geocities.com
 
2013-11-07 11:49:04 AM  

scottydoesntknow: The Golden Compass was the first movie I've ever walked out of.


Lemony Snicket for me, another one on this list.
 
2013-11-07 11:51:08 AM  
Lemon Snicket failed because this world is unworthy of Emily Browning.

i.imgur.com


i.imgur.com

 
2013-11-07 11:51:51 AM  
I don't remember who I stole this line from:

It would be cheaper and probably more fun to pay a few first graders to throw skittles at me for 2 hours.
 
2013-11-07 11:52:09 AM  
DanZero:
/quit Americanizing Japanese stuff hollywood!

why? i thought, from my years of reading fark comments, that all hollywood films were either cheap crappy remakes of foreign films no one in america would ever have heard of let alone cared about, or crappy remakes/reboots of older hollywood movies...many of which were already originally remakes of foreign films no one in america would ever have heard of let alone cared about.
 
2013-11-07 11:52:17 AM  
List is missing 'Push' & 'Eragon'
 
2013-11-07 11:52:21 AM  
Speed Racer 2?

Is that the one where the monkey and the kid hide in the trunk of the car? If I recall, they need to be hosed out of the trunk at the end of the "adventure". Nothing left but a bloody pulp.
 
2013-11-07 11:53:41 AM  
also, listing a movie that was released THIS YEAR in a listicle about being spared a sequel? come on! they could be working on a sequel that we haven't even heard of yet!
 
2013-11-07 11:54:27 AM  

Last Man on Earth: List fails without Highlander 2.



They made a sequel?  Why haven't I heard about this?  Liar.
 
2013-11-07 11:54:48 AM  

Last Man on Earth: List fails without Highlander 2.


Needs better understanding of the phrase "never happened".
 
2013-11-07 11:55:06 AM  
I would have replaced John Carter with Godzilla (1998). That movie was clearly designed to be turned into a sequel, with that ridiculous teaser ending. Thankfully it never happened.

John Carter wasn't terrible. It was decent, and a lot better than most crap that has endless sequels these days.
 
2013-11-07 11:55:38 AM  
Master & Commander is a pretty good movie. I would've liked a sequel.
 
2013-11-07 11:57:21 AM  

bungle_jr: also, listing a movie that was released THIS YEAR in a listicle about being spared a sequel? come on! they could be working on a sequel that we haven't even heard of yet!


Lone Ranger bombed so hard it may have repercussions on Johnny Depp's career. There's no way there's going to be a sequel. It lost almost $200m
 
2013-11-07 11:58:33 AM  

MithrandirBooga: John Carter wasn't terrible. It was decent, and a lot better than most crap that has endless sequels these days.


That's because Mars sucks. When will studio executives learn not to work with anything dealing with Mars, it just won't work. No matter how good the book, Mars fails with the populace.
 
2013-11-07 11:58:35 AM  

exparrot: Yes. How horrible would that be.
A colorful fun movie for children that had incredible visuals and a self-deprecating sense of humor.


And Christina Ricci as Trixie...   mmmmmmmmm....

1.bp.blogspot.com
 
2013-11-07 11:58:46 AM  
OK, now, this is odd:
Cowboys and Aliens (2011)
Harrison Ford as the iron-fisted Colonel Dolarhyde and Daniel Craig as a stranger with no memory of his past in Cowboys & Aliens.
Timothy White / Universal Studios and DreamWorks II
Source: Scott Mitchell Rosenberg's graphic novel

Budget: $163 million
Domestic Gross: $100 million

Post-Mortem: The title seemed like a no-brainer, and yet the movie failed to deliver even on the fun promised by those three words. Even with $75 million in overseas grosses, the movie failed to recoup its costs.

Correct me if I'm wrong, but if the film cost $163 million, made $100 million domestically, and an additional $75 million overseas, then it made $175 million total, which, last time I checked, was more than $163 million.

I actually liked the film, btw, but it's not really sequel material anyway.  There really wasn't anywhere to go with it, except having more alienses invade the West.
 
2013-11-07 11:59:35 AM  
Speed Racer was no masterpiece but it was exactly what a Speed Racer movie should have been.  I thoroughly enjoyed the movie, and in fact, I am going to go buy it today.  Thanks subby.
 
2013-11-07 12:00:13 PM  

MithrandirBooga: I would have replaced John Carter with Godzilla (1998). That movie was clearly designed to be turned into a sequel, with that ridiculous teaser ending. Thankfully it never happened.

John Carter wasn't terrible. It was decent, and a lot better than most crap that has endless sequels these days.



I watched JC on afternoon.  It was much better than people seemed to give it credit for.  Not a *great* movie by any stretch, but certainly on par with a lot of movies of it's genre that have done better.  The problems were with marketing I feel.
 
2013-11-07 12:00:23 PM  

DontMakeMeComeBackThere: Last Man on Earth: List fails without Highlander 2.

Needs better understanding of the phrase "never happened".


That's the thing, it didn't ever happen.  There was only ever one Highlander movie.  Any evidence to the contrary is nothing more than a terrible, terrible delusion.
 
2013-11-07 12:01:59 PM  

MithrandirBooga: I would have replaced John Carter with Godzilla (1998). That movie was clearly designed to be turned into a sequel, with that ridiculous teaser ending.


As horribly cheesy as that movie was, it was a great Sunday afternoon popcorn flick with a few decent action sequences for the times. A sequel was most definitely uncalled for...
 
2013-11-07 12:02:02 PM  

Mateorocks: Master & Commander is a pretty good movie. I would've liked a sequel.


It's a mediocre movie at best. Several really good scenes strung together with baling wire really. Movie suffers from incredibly bad pacing and poor direction.

rcantley: Lemony Snicket for me, another one on this list.


That was one for me as well, I think I made it 20 minutes in and then went to the front desk and asked for my money back. They gave me a gift card for later.I think I took it back later that month and watched The Aviator. Not nearly as bad, but I kinda wished they have just given me my money back.
 
2013-11-07 12:02:07 PM  

MithrandirBooga: I would have replaced John Carter with Godzilla (1998). That movie was clearly designed to be turned into a sequel, with that ridiculous teaser ending. Thankfully it never happened.


It's always been my contention that the 1998 film is better than 90% or more of the Japanese versions.  Better acting, better story, more scientifically believable, better special effects, and a recognition that Gojira is just an animal acting on it's own native instinct and intelligence, not some supernatural force.

And I'll take the raptor-like baby Zillas over Minilla any farkin' day of the week.
 
2013-11-07 12:02:07 PM  

MithrandirBooga: bungle_jr: also, listing a movie that was released THIS YEAR in a listicle about being spared a sequel? come on! they could be working on a sequel that we haven't even heard of yet!

Lone Ranger bombed so hard it may have repercussions on Johnny Depp's career. There's no way there's going to be a sequel. It lost almost $200m


according to wikipedia (yes, consider the source...but i really don't care to do any further research for this movie i don't care to watch) the film had a budget of $225-250million and a box office gross of $260million+. i have no idea if this includes dvd rentals/sales, etc, or if it includes movie tie-ins, toys, etc. but at any rate, it at least broke even, according to this stat.
 
2013-11-07 12:03:02 PM  

BafflerMeal: I watched JC on afternoon. It was much better than people seemed to give it credit for. Not a *great* movie by any stretch, but certainly on par with a lot of movies of it's genre that have done better. The problems were with marketing I feel.


The issue with JC is that it never made you want to care about the characters, it was essentially Dances With Wolves in Space
 
2013-11-07 12:03:44 PM  

bungle_jr: also, listing a movie that was released THIS YEAR in a listicle about being spared a sequel? come on! they could be working on a sequel that we haven't even heard of yet!


Unless the sequel centers around the bird on Depp's head, I wouldn't bother.
 
2013-11-07 12:05:21 PM  

blacksharpiemarker: MithrandirBooga: I would have replaced John Carter with Godzilla (1998). That movie was clearly designed to be turned into a sequel, with that ridiculous teaser ending.

As horribly cheesy as that movie was, it was a great Sunday afternoon popcorn flick with a few decent action sequences for the times. A sequel was most definitely uncalled for...


i was stoned out of my mind on percocets, rx from having my wisdom teeth pulled. i never did any drugs (alcohol is different) before, so percocets did me just fine. godzilla was fun while high.
 
2013-11-07 12:07:03 PM  

IdBeCrazyIf: BafflerMeal: I watched JC on afternoon. It was much better than people seemed to give it credit for. Not a *great* movie by any stretch, but certainly on par with a lot of movies of it's genre that have done better. The problems were with marketing I feel.

The issue with JC is that it never made you want to care about the characters, it was essentially Dances With Wolves in Space



And yet Avatar...
 
2013-11-07 12:07:33 PM  
Speed Racer was awesome! My nephew and I watch it all the time. Saw it in theaters day 1 and bought the DvD day 1 as well. Then again, I have always been a Speed Racer fan so that would be no surprise. I want another Speed Racer movie. It was very well done and kept the campiness of the original show.
 
2013-11-07 12:08:15 PM  

wildcardjack: That's because Mars sucks. When will studio executives learn not to work with anything dealing with Mars, it just won't work. No matter how good the book, Mars fails with the populace.


BafflerMeal: I watched JC on afternoon. It was much better than people seemed to give it credit for. Not a *great* movie by any stretch, but certainly on par with a lot of movies of it's genre that have done better. The problems were with marketing I feel.



wildcardjack is sort of right. Mars holds no interest to the general population. A movie about/on Mars is just generally not going to see the returns they want if they spend blockbuster-style money on it. John Carter would have worked a lot better if it were a niche film with a lower budget and a more focused audience.

However this is becoming an increasingly large problem with most blockbusters nowadays. 3 of the top 10 movie flops of all time were released just this summer (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_box_office_bombs#Biggest_box_of fi ce_bombs ); Hollywood has got to stop spending so much money on gigantic films and spending money on smaller niche films. This idea that every movie has to appeal to everyone is watering down films so much that it's actually turning off most viewers.
 
2013-11-07 12:09:08 PM  

DontMakeMeComeBackThere: Last Man on Earth: List fails without Highlander 2.

Needs better understanding of the phrase "never happened".


Do you hear a whistling sound over your head?
 
2013-11-07 12:09:44 PM  

BafflerMeal: And yet Avatar...


James Cameron doesn't do what James Cameron does for James Cameron. James Cameron does what James Cameron does because James Cameron is James Cameron!
 
2013-11-07 12:10:53 PM  

dittybopper: OK, now, this is odd:
Cowboys and Aliens (2011)
Harrison Ford as the iron-fisted Colonel Dolarhyde and Daniel Craig as a stranger with no memory of his past in Cowboys & Aliens.
Timothy White / Universal Studios and DreamWorks II
Source: Scott Mitchell Rosenberg's graphic novel
Budget: $163 million
Domestic Gross: $100 million
Post-Mortem: The title seemed like a no-brainer, and yet the movie failed to deliver even on the fun promised by those three words. Even with $75 million in overseas grosses, the movie failed to recoup its costs.

Correct me if I'm wrong, but if the film cost $163 million, made $100 million domestically, and an additional $75 million overseas, then it made $175 million total, which, last time I checked, was more than $163 million.

I actually liked the film, btw, but it's not really sequel material anyway.  There really wasn't anywhere to go with it, except having more alienses invade the West.


Rule of thumb is you always divide by two.  About half the gross goes to the theaters, distributors, etc.  So a $163 million movie needs to make $326 million to be successful for the studio.
 
2013-11-07 12:11:03 PM  

wildcardjack


MithrandirBooga: John Carter wasn't terrible. It was decent, and a lot better than most crap that has endless sequels these days.

That's because Mars sucks. When will studio executives learn not to work with anything dealing with Mars, it just won't work. No matter how good the book, Mars fails with the populace.


Counterpoint:

top50sf.files.wordpress.com


ACK ACK ACK!
 
2013-11-07 12:11:50 PM  

MithrandirBooga: I would have replaced John Carter with Godzilla (1998). That movie was clearly designed to be turned into a sequel, with that ridiculous teaser ending. Thankfully it never happened.


Actually, it did.

It lead directly to this:

www.tvshowsondvd.com

... and it was actually pretty good.
 
2013-11-07 12:12:38 PM  

Englebert Slaptyback: wildcardjack

MithrandirBooga: John Carter wasn't terrible. It was decent, and a lot better than most crap that has endless sequels these days.

That's because Mars sucks. When will studio executives learn not to work with anything dealing with Mars, it just won't work. No matter how good the book, Mars fails with the populace.


Counterpoint:

[top50sf.files.wordpress.com image 850x463]


ACK ACK ACK!


such a fun movie!
 
2013-11-07 12:13:08 PM  
DanZero: There was already the first Speed Racer movie. That's bad enough.

/quit Americanizing Japanese stuff hollywood!


Would I be right in presuming you are obese and have a whole range of anime action figures at home?
 
2013-11-07 12:14:43 PM  
I liked Cowboys & Aliens...
 
2013-11-07 12:15:46 PM  
bungle_jr:
but at any rate, it at least broke even, according to this stat.

You're forgetting "Hollywood Accounting 101."

Any movie that loses money is a disaster.

Any movie that breaks even is a huge money loser.

Any money that seems to show a profit is also actually a big money loser, and you'll probably never see a dime from it, even if the studio has to invent expenses to make that happen.

New Line swore up and down that the Lord of the Rings lost money. Really.

Warner Brothers said Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix - a movie that grossed $600 million - lost $167 million.

The king of this might be "Return of the Jedi." It cost $32 million to make in 1983. It grossed $475 million. It still hasn't shown a profit.
 
2013-11-07 12:17:03 PM  

PIP_the_TROLL: MithrandirBooga: I would have replaced John Carter with Godzilla (1998). That movie was clearly designed to be turned into a sequel, with that ridiculous teaser ending. Thankfully it never happened.

Actually, it did.

It lead directly to this:

[www.tvshowsondvd.com image 375x504]

... and it was actually pretty good.


Because that show put the God back into Zilla and made him Godzilla again!
 
2013-11-07 12:17:24 PM  
Master and Commander was an amazing movie. I wish more like it were made.
 
2013-11-07 12:18:24 PM  
I guessed Lemony Snicket, The Golden Compass, Lost in Space and Eragon would be on the list.  Two out of four ain't bad, right?
 
2013-11-07 12:20:17 PM  

IdBeCrazyIf: BafflerMeal: I watched JC on afternoon. It was much better than people seemed to give it credit for. Not a *great* movie by any stretch, but certainly on par with a lot of movies of it's genre that have done better. The problems were with marketing I feel.

The issue with JC is that it never made you want to care about the characters, it was essentially Dances With Wolves in Space


The other Dances With Wolves in Space made a metric ass ton of money. Or was it Ferngully/Last Samurai in Space.
 
2013-11-07 12:22:34 PM  

Fano: The other Dances With Wolves in Space made a metric ass ton of money. Or was it Ferngully/Last Samurai in Space.


The visuals sold that movie along with the marketing

Englebert Slaptyback: ACK ACK ACK!


Best part of that movie was Jim Brown
 
2013-11-07 12:22:39 PM  

SkunkWorx: I guessed Lemony Snicket, The Golden Compass, Lost in Space and Eragon would be on the list.  Two out of four ain't bad, right?


i'd pay to see a "l.i.s." sequel based on the uniforms worn by the females alone!
 
2013-11-07 12:23:12 PM  
A list of box office flops... why would they deserve sequels? I think most, if not ALL of those films suffered from bad marketing.
 
2013-11-07 12:25:21 PM  

Fano: IdBeCrazyIf: BafflerMeal: I watched JC on afternoon. It was much better than people seemed to give it credit for. Not a *great* movie by any stretch, but certainly on par with a lot of movies of it's genre that have done better. The problems were with marketing I feel.

The issue with JC is that it never made you want to care about the characters, it was essentially Dances With Wolves in Space

The other Dances With Wolves in Space made a metric ass ton of money. Or was it Ferngully/Last Samurai in Space.


Yes, but without the benefits of having Tim Curry.
 
2013-11-07 12:28:39 PM  

Last Man on Earth: List fails without Highlander 2.


That and Robocop 2.
 
2013-11-07 12:29:13 PM  
Buckaroo Banzai
 
2013-11-07 12:29:35 PM  
Leonard part vi.

Aren't most of these movies too new to say a sequel will never be made? This is just a list of disastrous franchises.
 
2013-11-07 12:33:55 PM  

whereisian: Master and Commander was an amazing movie. I wish more like it were made.


Likewise. It was also the best Star Trek movie since Wrath of Khan.
 
2013-11-07 12:36:07 PM  
Skyline demands a recount


for what's it worth, maybe it's because it got really bad reviews, but I didn't think Skyline was that bad; probably a bit too presumptuous that it would get a sequel, though.
 
2013-11-07 12:42:00 PM  

Skiffy: whereisian: Master and Commander was an amazing movie. I wish more like it were made.

Likewise. It was also the best Star Trek movie since Wrath of Khan.


I think the poor results have more to do with the timing.  It came out right as all the personal issues that killed Russel Crowe's career was being revealed, and that may have disinclined people to see it.
 
2013-11-07 12:42:27 PM  

Mateorocks: Master & Commander is a pretty good movie. I would've liked a sequel.


A&E needs to do a series based on the  Aubrey-Maturin series, like they did for Horatio.
 
2013-11-07 12:47:08 PM  

Cheron: Buckaroo Banzai


Oh come on, that movie was just campy fun! I would have paid to see the sequel!
 
2013-11-07 12:48:51 PM  

dittybopper: OK, now, this is odd:
Cowboys and Aliens (2011)
Harrison Ford as the iron-fisted Colonel Dolarhyde and Daniel Craig as a stranger with no memory of his past in Cowboys & Aliens.
Timothy White / Universal Studios and DreamWorks II
Source: Scott Mitchell Rosenberg's graphic novel
Budget: $163 million
Domestic Gross: $100 million
Post-Mortem: The title seemed like a no-brainer, and yet the movie failed to deliver even on the fun promised by those three words. Even with $75 million in overseas grosses, the movie failed to recoup its costs.

Correct me if I'm wrong, but if the film cost $163 million, made $100 million domestically, and an additional $75 million overseas, then it made $175 million total, which, last time I checked, was more than $163 million.

I actually liked the film, btw, but it's not really sequel material anyway.  There really wasn't anywhere to go with it, except having more alienses invade the West.


In Hollywood terms, the only thing that is consistently creative is the accounting.

A film could make 100x its budget back and still be considered to be in the red depending on how the
studios divert the funds.

/Never take a cut of the net, only the gross.
 
2013-11-07 12:48:58 PM  

Mateorocks: Master & Commander is a pretty good movie. I would've liked a sequel.


Agreed. It's failure made me sad.
 
2013-11-07 12:51:38 PM  

cirby: bungle_jr:
but at any rate, it at least broke even, according to this stat.

You're forgetting "Hollywood Accounting 101."

Any movie that loses money is a disaster.

Any movie that breaks even is a huge money loser.

Any money that seems to show a profit is also actually a big money loser, and you'll probably never see a dime from it, even if the studio has to invent expenses to make that happen.


Someone has to pay for the hookers and coke.
 
2013-11-07 12:52:39 PM  

dittybopper: MithrandirBooga: I would have replaced John Carter with Godzilla (1998). That movie was clearly designed to be turned into a sequel, with that ridiculous teaser ending. Thankfully it never happened.

It's always been my contention that the 1998 film is better than 90% or more of the Japanese versions.  Better acting, better story, more scientifically believable, better special effects, and a recognition that Gojira is just an animal acting on it's own native instinct and intelligence, not some supernatural force.

And I'll take the raptor-like baby Zillas over Minilla any farkin' day of the week.


I've got to disagree with you on that last point:  Minilla had a goofy kind of charm and personality, whereas
the baby GINOs were basically the raptors from JURASSIC PARK with slightly updated rendering software.

/My favorite Toho film has to be GODZILLA FINAL WARS, which is just bugs-on-the-windshield insane
from start to finish.
 
2013-11-07 12:53:07 PM  

ArkPanda: dittybopper: OK, now, this is odd:
Cowboys and Aliens (2011)
Harrison Ford as the iron-fisted Colonel Dolarhyde and Daniel Craig as a stranger with no memory of his past in Cowboys & Aliens.
Timothy White / Universal Studios and DreamWorks II
Source: Scott Mitchell Rosenberg's graphic novel
Budget: $163 million
Domestic Gross: $100 million
Post-Mortem: The title seemed like a no-brainer, and yet the movie failed to deliver even on the fun promised by those three words. Even with $75 million in overseas grosses, the movie failed to recoup its costs.

Correct me if I'm wrong, but if the film cost $163 million, made $100 million domestically, and an additional $75 million overseas, then it made $175 million total, which, last time I checked, was more than $163 million.

I actually liked the film, btw, but it's not really sequel material anyway.  There really wasn't anywhere to go with it, except having more alienses invade the West.

Rule of thumb is you always divide by two.  About half the gross goes to the theaters, distributors, etc.  So a $163 million movie needs to make $326 million to be successful for the studio.


Not only that but the studio percentage on overseas box office is typically less than on domestic box office. So to use cowboys and aliens for an example, while the studio might have gotten anywhere from 50-90% of the north american box office (depending on how many weeks it lasted) it probably wouldn't have made as much of the overseas revenue.
 
2013-11-07 12:54:01 PM  

Rambino: exparrot: Yes. How horrible would that be.
A colorful fun movie for children that had incredible visuals and a self-deprecating sense of humor.

And Christina Ricci as Trixie...   mmmmmmmmm....

[1.bp.blogspot.com image 400x320]


Hell yeah.

Speed Racer was farking hilarious, it could almost have made up for the first Matrix sequel, if such an abomination actually existed.

I especially loved the dénouement with Racer X and Inspector Detector, just completely WTF? for what's supposed to be a kids film.
 
2013-11-07 12:55:55 PM  
My opinion(s):
Shame about Master and Commander.  Was a good movie and fairly well done.  Ships are cool.

Jonah Hex:  Cheesy but enjoyable.

John Carter:  Saw this for the first time earlier this year, was very surprised.  Was actually a pretty good movie.
 
2013-11-07 12:58:20 PM  
I don't understand why the Matrix wasn't on that list.  The idea that they might have made sequels to that makes me shudder.   Also, this
 
2013-11-07 01:03:52 PM  

Cheron: Buckaroo Banzai


Add this and Starship Troopers to the list of movies that people failed to realize were spoofs. In fact, the trailer at the end of Buckaroo Banzai is itself yet another spoof.

Movies that do deserve a sequel; Solomon Kane, Detective Dee, etc.
 
2013-11-07 01:04:51 PM  

dittybopper: MithrandirBooga: I would have replaced John Carter with Godzilla (1998). That movie was clearly designed to be turned into a sequel, with that ridiculous teaser ending. Thankfully it never happened.

It's always been my contention that the 1998 film is better than 90% or more of the Japanese versions.  Better acting, better story, more scientifically believable, better special effects, and a recognition that Gojira is just an animal acting on it's own native instinct and intelligence, not some supernatural force.

And I'll take the raptor-like baby Zillas over Minilla any farkin' day of the week.


But babyzilla was soooo cuuuuuute....
 
2013-11-07 01:08:55 PM  

IC Stars: Mateorocks: Master & Commander is a pretty good movie. I would've liked a sequel.

A&E needs to do a series based on the  Aubrey-Maturin series, like they did for Horatio.


This.
 
2013-11-07 01:09:45 PM  

mjohnson71: Mateorocks: Master & Commander is a pretty good movie. I would've liked a sequel.

Agreed. It's failure made me sad.


It at least lives on today as my "official movie to test the sound system" whenever I upgrade/move the home theater setup. The opening, up through the battle, is great to put speakers through its paces.

/About the only thing Revenge of the Sith is good for, too
//Used to be The Matrix, but M&C/Ep3 took over
 
2013-11-07 01:16:46 PM  

dittybopper: Correct me if I'm wrong, but if the film cost $163 million, made $100 million domestically, and an additional $75 million overseas, then it made $175 million total, which, last time I checked, was more than $163 million.


It used to be that domestic gross changed over the release timeline.  That was changed in the 90's.  A good estimation of how much a studio gets out of the box office pie is as follows:  50% of domestic, 30% of international.  This is actually being generous for international (I've seen it as low as 15%).  But that doesn't tell the whole picture, because on top of the negative costs the studio also pays for advertising and print costs, which for $100 million film will easily add 30-50 million.  For your example we'll add it up:

100 domestic = 50 million
75 international = 22.5 million
Total 165 = 72.5
Budget of 163 million + marketing, prints, etc. we'll call it 200 million.
200-72.5 = 127.5 million in the red.

bungle_jr: according to wikipedia (yes, consider the source...but i really don't care to do any further research for this movie i don't care to watch) the film had a budget of $225-250million and a box office gross of $260million+. i have no idea if this includes dvd rentals/sales, etc, or if it includes movie tie-ins, toys, etc. but at any rate, it at least broke even, according to this stat.


For The Lone Ranger:
Budget 215 million +75 million for adverts, prints = 290 million
Domestic 90 = 45 million
International 171 = 51.3
45+51.3 = 96.3 million
290 - 96.3=193.7 million in the red.
 
2013-11-07 01:16:52 PM  

JayCab: It at least lives on today as my "official movie to test the sound system" whenever I upgrade/move the home theater setup. The opening, up through the battle, is great to put speakers through its paces.



That's funny, that is totally what I use that movie for too. It is amazing how during pretty much the whole movie you can constantly hear the creak of the ship and the splashing of waves against the boat just faintly, but not enough to over power any talking. Plus the sound of the wood cracking when cannons hit is awesome.
 
2013-11-07 01:18:09 PM  
The Golden Compass (2007)

I read the books for the first time earlier this year, and it's been a very long time since I've read something as engaging. I haven't seen the film, but if I understand correctly the source material they removed, it would be absolutely impossible to continue the narrative where it went through the ensuing two books/movies. The butthurts forcing the removal of the "anti-religious" elements only proved how right Pullman was with the themes in the books.
 
2013-11-07 01:18:29 PM  

cirby: bungle_jr:
but at any rate, it at least broke even, according to this stat.

You're forgetting "Hollywood Accounting 101."

Any movie that loses money is a disaster.

Any movie that breaks even is a huge money loser.

Any money that seems to show a profit is also actually a big money loser, and you'll probably never see a dime from it, even if the studio has to invent expenses to make that happen.

New Line swore up and down that the Lord of the Rings lost money. Really.

Warner Brothers said Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix - a movie that grossed $600 million - lost $167 million.

The king of this might be "Return of the Jedi." It cost $32 million to make in 1983. It grossed $475 million. It still hasn't shown a profit.


They make these claims, then fight tooth and nail in court to avoid releasing the number that they are based off of. This is crap they pull to keep from paying people a full share of the profits.

It would be nice if they disclosed how much was spent on marketing the films.
 
2013-11-07 01:18:57 PM  

whereisian: Master and Commander was an amazing movie. I wish more like it were made.


It was a great movie that suprised me. I saw it at home when I was sick. I really wasnt expecting much from it at all.
 
2013-11-07 01:19:02 PM  

MithrandirBooga: However this is becoming an increasingly large problem with most blockbusters nowadays. 3 of the top 10 movie flops of all time were released just this summer (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_box_office_bombs#Biggest_box_of fi ce_bombs ); Hollywood has got to stop spending so much money on gigantic films and spending money on smaller niche films. This idea that every movie has to appeal to everyone is watering down films so much that it's actually turning off most viewers.


Holy crap, a cursory glance at that list revealed this at #26:

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/A_Sound_of_Thunder_%28film%29

How the hell did they spend 80mil on that piece of shiat?  I swore they just hired a bunch of middle-schoolers with pirated copies of 3dMax and Nuke on their Macbook Pros to do all the VFX.
 
2013-11-07 01:19:58 PM  
Speed Racer was a great movie with incredible visuals.  It is exactly what it was supposed to be, campy and all.  Need to remind myself to watch it tonight, thanks Subby.
 
2013-11-07 01:22:40 PM  

Car_Ramrod: I liked Cowboys & Aliens...


As did I. It was pretty much exactly what it said it was.

/never saw Lemony Snicket, but Emily Browning is so cute
 
2013-11-07 01:27:34 PM  

dittybopper: OK, now, this is odd:
Cowboys and Aliens (2011)
Harrison Ford as the iron-fisted Colonel Dolarhyde and Daniel Craig as a stranger with no memory of his past in Cowboys & Aliens.
Timothy White / Universal Studios and DreamWorks II
Source: Scott Mitchell Rosenberg's graphic novel
Budget: $163 million
Domestic Gross: $100 million
Post-Mortem: The title seemed like a no-brainer, and yet the movie failed to deliver even on the fun promised by those three words. Even with $75 million in overseas grosses, the movie failed to recoup its costs.

Correct me if I'm wrong, but if the film cost $163 million, made $100 million domestically, and an additional $75 million overseas, then it made $175 million total, which, last time I checked, was more than $163 million.

I actually liked the film, btw, but it's not really sequel material anyway.  There really wasn't anywhere to go with it, except having more alienses invade the West.


Hollywood math. Everyone loses (on paper) with Hollywood math.

I keep hoping stuff like this will put a nail in the coffin of starting work on a Hollywood adaptation of a comic book before said comic even comes out, then maybe someone will get Locke and Key the recognition it deserves.

Jonah Hex was just a terrible idea. The moment they gave him powers everyone involved should have been fired and kicked in the head. It would have worked better as a moody indie flick than a blockbuster.
 
2013-11-07 01:35:59 PM  

wildcardjack: MithrandirBooga: John Carter wasn't terrible. It was decent, and a lot better than most crap that has endless sequels these days.

That's because Mars sucks. When will studio executives learn not to work with anything dealing with Mars, it just won't work. No matter how good the book, Mars fails with the populace.


That wasn't the problem. The problem is that when the book was written it was a sci-fi. It's now fantasy yet the story went through as science fiction. A better script may have saved it.

Hard to get people to accept Mars as having aliens on it when we haven't found them yet. Now the original Total Recall where humans have colonized it? Easier to grasp as an idea than aliens on Mars needing human moms or warring factions of humanoids on Mars aligning with various alien species.
 
2013-11-07 01:36:10 PM  

tmcottle: Cheron: Buckaroo Banzai

Oh come on, that movie was just campy fun! I would have paid to see the sequel!


Big Trouble in Little China was pretty awesome.
 
2013-11-07 01:41:08 PM  

NathanAllen: Cheron: Buckaroo Banzai

Add this and Starship Troopers to the list of movies that people failed to realize were spoofs. In fact, the trailer at the end of Buckaroo Banzai is itself yet another spoof.

 
Like Star Wars.
 
2013-11-07 01:42:27 PM  

DjangoStonereaver: whereas
the baby GINOs were basically the raptors from JURASSIC PARK with slightly updated rendering software.


You know that almost all of the scenes in Jurassic Park featuring the raptors, they were puppets, right?

Also, how many different ways can you portray a bipedal dinosaur-like creature that size?  Precisely *ONE*.   The reason why they look like raptors, is because that's the only effective way to make them bipedal, fast, and, well,  not stupid looking at that size. Theropods shared a pretty consistent body plan, and it's a good one.

Remember that Gojira was designed back in they day when we thought bipedal dinosaurs walked upright, and Gojira is a dinosaur of some kind.  If you look at the posture of the original Gojira against the more recent versions, the back has gone from being largely vertical:

i40.tinypic.com

To being closer to horizontal, at about a 45 degree angle:

i44.tinypic.com

And of course, we have Zilla, who has a very theropod-like body plan and a correct horizontal posture:

images2.wikia.nocookie.net

You can get away with a somewhat different body plan at the huge size, but if you go with it at the size of the baby Zillas, it looks tremendously stupid:

static1.wikia.nocookie.net

Aside from the silliness of the picture, I wouldn't feel that threatened if I saw something like that coming down the street at me, because it's obvious that I could out-run it.

My biggest beef with Zilla wasn't the locomotion or body plan, it was the head.

We associate significance to faces.  That should have remained more "Gojira-like".  I don't care for the stupid huge lower-jaw look.

When all is said and done, though, the 1998 version was *BETTER* than most of the Japanese films.  And I say this as someone who has been a kaiju fan since I was a young kid (watching Ultraman, the Godzilla films, Johnny Sokko, Gamera, etc.).

It has a much better plot than most of the Japanese films, and a better origin story than all of them.  The science is better than all of the Japanese films, including the original.  Godzilla is treated as an animal with needs and feelings, not as some malevolent or benevolent supernatural (and mostly unkillable) force.

I think it actually suffers because of the name.  Calling it "Godzilla" instead "The Monster that ate New York" or something like that invariably invokes feelings for both fans and detractors of Godzilla.  Godzilla fans don't like it because the monster was too different from what they were used to seeing.  People who don't like Godzilla wouldn't see because they don't like Godzilla.

Had the film and monster been called something else, I'm betting it would have done a bit better.


/Say "Hi" to Jack's beer for me.
 
2013-11-07 01:44:11 PM  
I am still waiting for Sky Captain 2.
 
2013-11-07 01:45:30 PM  

Fano: Big Trouble in Little China was pretty awesome.


That could have used some sequels. Not the China theme again but Jack Burton getting into other adventures like Indiana Jones.
 
2013-11-07 01:46:47 PM  
I actually liked Cowboys and Aliens, I don't know why it did so poorly.
 
2013-11-07 01:48:02 PM  
www.internationalhero.co.uk
 
2013-11-07 01:54:50 PM  

Joey Jo Jo Jr Shabadu: MithrandirBooga: However this is becoming an increasingly large problem with most blockbusters nowadays. 3 of the top 10 movie flops of all time were released just this summer (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_box_office_bombs#Biggest_box_of fi ce_bombs ); Hollywood has got to stop spending so much money on gigantic films and spending money on smaller niche films. This idea that every movie has to appeal to everyone is watering down films so much that it's actually turning off most viewers.

Holy crap, a cursory glance at that list revealed this at #26:

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/A_Sound_of_Thunder_%28film%29

How the hell did they spend 80mil on that piece of shiat?  I swore they just hired a bunch of middle-schoolers with pirated copies of 3dMax and Nuke on their Macbook Pros to do all the VFX.


Wait, that movie cost 80 million?  I've seen SyFy movies with better special effects.  Hell I've seen Asylum movies with better FX.
 
2013-11-07 02:03:37 PM  

yves0010: Speed Racer was awesome! My nephew and I watch it all the time. Saw it in theaters day 1 and bought the DvD day 1 as well. Then again, I have always been a Speed Racer fan so that would be no surprise. I want another Speed Racer movie. It was very well done and kept the campiness of the original show.


Exactly. It's like the people biatching about the Speed Racer movie never ever saw the horrible one dimensional cartoon that my 8 year old self loved. I mean honestly the cartoon was crap, utter and complete crap, and you had to be a little boy to enjoy it.

The movie was fun, but Susan Sarandon and John Goodman make that movie into something that was awesome.
 
2013-11-07 02:05:57 PM  

Car_Ramrod: I liked Cowboys & Aliens...


Ignore User

j/k, but the only thing that could have saved that movie would have been showing the entire Olivia Wilde campsite scene.  Seriously what was Paul Dano thinking?
 
2013-11-07 02:09:07 PM  

bungle_jr: also, listing a movie that was released THIS YEAR in a listicle about being spared a sequel? come on! they could be working on a sequel that we haven't even heard of yet!


Did you see how far the movie fell short of its budget? It's not getting a sequel.
 
2013-11-07 02:09:32 PM  
I've often wondered if those who hate John Carter so much have actually seen it. I went into it thinking it was going to stink, and found it to be pretty damn enjoyable. It is a fun, entertaining and well made diversion - what more could you ask for? Sure it was flop, but that doesn't make it a bad movie. Disney just screwed the release because they had no idea how to market it, same as they did with Lone Ranger (which I also thought was a decent action flick).
 
2013-11-07 02:10:19 PM  

Englebert Slaptyback: wildcardjack

MithrandirBooga: John Carter wasn't terrible. It was decent, and a lot better than most crap that has endless sequels these days.

That's because Mars sucks. When will studio executives learn not to work with anything dealing with Mars, it just won't work. No matter how good the book, Mars fails with the populace.


Counterpoint:

[top50sf.files.wordpress.com image 850x463]


ACK ACK ACK!


Two things... It's not ON Mars, and it sorta bombed.
 
2013-11-07 02:11:40 PM  
I'm in the Speed Racer fan club too. I thought it was a great movie, and I'm pretty picky. It has great visuals and each of the races are fun. Come on, any movie with a beehive catapult should get an automatic pass.

Beehive. Catapult.

And it has an extended flash forward. That's something you just don't see in movies, pretty much ever.

I'll have to bust out the movie tonight too. Subby is inspiring!
 
2013-11-07 02:14:20 PM  

BafflerMeal: [www.internationalhero.co.uk image 500x399]


I loved Remo Williams when I was a kid, and recently noticed it is streaming on Netflix. I'm afraid to watch it, as I'm not sure it will hold up on viewing it today....
 
2013-11-07 02:16:41 PM  

Jake Leg: I loved Remo Williams when I was a kid, and recently noticed it is streaming on Netflix. I'm afraid to watch it, as I'm not sure it will hold up on viewing it today....


SPOILER ALERT

it doesn't
 
2013-11-07 02:17:48 PM  
I always thought that "I Am Number Four" would have benefited from a prequel called "I Am Number Two".
 
2013-11-07 02:19:12 PM  

wildcardjack


Englebert Slaptyback: wildcardjack

MithrandirBooga: John Carter wasn't terrible. It was decent, and a lot better than most crap that has endless sequels these days.

That's because Mars sucks. When will studio executives learn not to work with anything dealing with Mars, it just won't work. No matter how good the book, Mars fails with the populace.


Counterpoint:

[top50sf.files.wordpress.com image 850x463]


ACK ACK ACK!

Two things... It's not ON Mars, and it sorta bombed.


1) You said the embiggened phrase "anything dealing with Mars". 'Mars Attacks' has Mars right there in the title.

2) But now it has a decent following. It's kind of like 'Office Space' in that respect.
 
2013-11-07 02:21:00 PM  

Waldo Pepper: Jake Leg: I've often wondered if those who hate John Carter so much have actually seen it. I went into it thinking it was going to stink, and found it to be pretty damn enjoyable. It is a fun, entertaining and well made diversion - what more could you ask for? Sure it was flop, but that doesn't make it a bad movie. Disney just screwed the release because they had no idea how to market it, same as they did with Lone Ranger (which I also thought was a decent action flick).

I watch John Carter and I know nothing of the source material.  The movie had potential and I found the storyline taking place on earth to be quite intriguing.  There was something about the lead actor that to me just didn't fit the role.


My biggest issue with it was the inconsistency with his strength and athletics. Ok so in one scene, he can swing a massive boulder like a yo-yo, and in another he's struggling an one on one fight with an alien about his same size. He can jump 8 football fields in one scene, but can't get higher than 10 feet in another.
 
2013-11-07 02:22:36 PM  
Remember the competing Mars movies that came out at the same time, Mission to Mars and Red Planet? Yeah, they sucked too.
 
2013-11-07 02:25:45 PM  

ReapTheChaos: I actually liked Cowboys and Aliens, I don't know why it did so poorly.


I liked it also, especially the fact that it was played straight, and not like a comedy.

Daniel Craig was especially good in it.  He should do more characters like that.
 
2013-11-07 02:28:34 PM  

BalugaJoe: I am still waiting for Sky Captain 2.


This!!!!
 
2013-11-07 02:29:46 PM  

dittybopper: You know that almost all of the scenes in Jurassic Park featuring the raptors, they were puppets, right?


dudes in suits, captain of wrong.  dudes in suits.

http://www.stanwinstonschool.com/blog/jurassic-park-evolution-of-a-r ap tor-suit
 
2013-11-07 02:32:32 PM  

Dack48: BalugaJoe: I am still waiting for Sky Captain 2.

This!!!!



'Sky Captain and The World of Today' isn't a very interesting screenplay.  Too much FCC and OSHA.
 
2013-11-07 02:32:35 PM  

dittybopper: Correct me if I'm wrong, but if the film cost $163 million, made $100 million domestically, and an additional $75 million overseas, then it made $175 million total, which, last time I checked, was more than $163 million.


Maybe they meant:

Production Cost = $163 million
Gross Earnings to the Studio = $175 million
Promotional costs, taxes (including overseas), financing cost, etc > $8 million

Although IIRC Hollywood accounting is pretty messed up and studios frequently work very hard to show the IRS that their films barely made money.
 
2013-11-07 02:35:02 PM  

Mugato: Remember the competing Mars movies that came out at the same time, Mission to Mars and Red Planet? Yeah, they sucked too.


Huh.  Looks like our exploration robot buddy here was switched to "homicidal".  There we go, that fixed it.
 
2013-11-07 02:35:45 PM  

frepnog: dittybopper: You know that almost all of the scenes in Jurassic Park featuring the raptors, they were puppets, right?

dudes in suits, captain of wrong.  dudes in suits.

http://www.stanwinstonschool.com/blog/jurassic-park-evolution-of-a-r ap tor-suit


Holy crap that must've been killer on those guys legs, having to keep your knees bent like that for so long.
 
2013-11-07 02:38:21 PM  

dittybopper: DjangoStonereaver: whereas
the baby GINOs were basically the raptors from JURASSIC PARK with slightly updated rendering software.

You know that almost all of the scenes in Jurassic Park featuring the raptors, they were puppets, right?


I had heard that, but the raptor who chased the girl was CGI for a good deal of the time, wasn't it?

Also, how many different ways can you portray a bipedal dinosaur-like creature that size?  Precisely *ONE*.   The reason why they look like raptors, is because that's the only effective way to make them bipedal, fast, and, well,  not stupid looking at that size. Theropods shared a pretty consistent body plan, and it's a good one.

Remember that Gojira was designed back in they day when we thought bipedal dinosaurs walked upright, and Gojira is a dinosaur of some kind.  If you look at the posture of the original Gojira against the more recent versions, the back has gone from being largely vertical:

[i40.tinypic.com image 650x491]

To being closer to horizontal, at about a 45 degree angle:

[i44.tinypic.com image 450x300]

And of course, we have Zilla, who has a very theropod-like body plan and a correct horizontal posture:

[images2.wikia.nocookie.net image 400x300]

You can get away with a somewhat different body plan at the huge size, but if you go with it at the size of the baby Zillas, it looks tremendously stupid:

[static1.wikia.nocookie.net image 403x479]

Aside from the silliness of the picture, I wouldn't feel that threatened if I saw something like that coming down the street at me, because it's obvious that I could out-run it.

My biggest beef with Zilla wasn't the locomotion or body plan, it was the head.

We associate significance to faces.  That should have remained more "Gojira-like".  I don't care for the stupid huge lower-jaw look.

When all is said and done, though, the 1998 version was *BETTER* than most of the Japanese films.  And I say this as someone who has been a kaiju fan since I was a young kid (watching Ultraman, the Godzilla films, Johnny Sokko, Gamera, etc.).

It has a much better plot than most of the Japanese films, and a better origin story than all of them.  The science is better than all of the Japanese films, including the original.  Godzilla is treated as an animal with needs and feelings, not as some malevolent or benevolent supernatural (and mostly unkillable) force.

I think it actually suffers because of the name.  Calling it "Godzilla" instead "The Monster that ate New York" or something like that invariably invokes feelings for both fans and detractors of Godzilla.  Godzilla fans don't like it because the monster was too different from what they were used to seeing.  People who don't like Godzilla wouldn't see because they don't like Godzilla.

Had the film and monster been called something else, I'm betting it would have done a bit better.


All excellent points.  It is a bit unfair to compare the GINO movie to the Toho ones because they
were made with very different mindsets:  The GINO movie was made to be based in the real world (as
was the original GOIJIRA, though not as strongly), whereas every Toho film after GOIJRA is based in its
own comic-book-like universe with its own rules and science.  In that sense, GINO works better as an
updating/remake of THE BEAST FROM 20,000 FATHOMS, which was also based on the science of the
time, and with Jean Reno in the Lee Van Cleef role.  But that wouldn't have sold Taco Bell chalupas.

The biggest shame, I think, is that the female lead's career really never went anywhere.  I thought she was quite cute:

www.probertencyclopaedia.com

(I have to say, though, that the one thing I cannot forgive the US producers for doing is not giving their
monster a breath weapon.  Yes, I know its not scienfically accurate, but fercrhissakes, what they did
instead was hardly more accurate).

/Say "Hi" to Jack's beer for me.

;-)
 
2013-11-07 02:38:52 PM  

scottydoesntknow: frepnog: dittybopper: You know that almost all of the scenes in Jurassic Park featuring the raptors, they were puppets, right?

dudes in suits, captain of wrong.  dudes in suits.

http://www.stanwinstonschool.com/blog/jurassic-park-evolution-of-a-r ap tor-suit

Holy crap that must've been killer on those guys legs, having to keep your knees bent like that for so long.



http://youtu.be/rvHzTnfZUjY
 
2013-11-07 02:40:59 PM  

Jake Leg: I've often wondered if those who hate John Carter so much have actually seen it. I went into it thinking it was going to stink, and found it to be pretty damn enjoyable. It is a fun, entertaining and well made diversion - what more could you ask for? Sure it was flop, but that doesn't make it a bad movie. Disney just screwed the release because they had no idea how to market it, same as they did with Lone Ranger (which I also thought was a decent action flick).


The marketing didn't help.  It made it look like Tarzan versus the critters in the pit from Star Wars Episode II.  But good reviews or good word of mouth might've overcome that.  That would've required a more compelling plot.  But the plot was overcomplicated with too many alien bad guys and no time to sort them all out.
 
2013-11-07 02:44:46 PM  

frepnog: dittybopper: You know that almost all of the scenes in Jurassic Park featuring the raptors, they were puppets, right?

dudes in suits, captain of wrong.  dudes in suits.

http://www.stanwinstonschool.com/blog/jurassic-park-evolution-of-a-r ap tor-suit


Same thing.  They were practical effects, not CGI for almost the entire film, which was my point.
 
2013-11-07 02:48:20 PM  

DjangoStonereaver: (I have to say, though, that the one thing I cannot forgive the US producers for doing is not giving their
monster a breath weapon.  Yes, I know its not scienfically accurate, but fercrhissakes, what they did
instead was hardly more accurate).


GINO had a breath weapon

And I agree with you about Ms. Pitillo.
 
2013-11-07 02:54:24 PM  

Mugato: Remember the competing Mars movies that came out at the same time, Mission to Mars and Red Planet? Yeah, they sucked too.


I almost walked out of that one, I stuck through till the end and then we it got to the got damn insect part I wanted to go get a plane ticket to LA just so I could find the writers and kick them in the junk
 
2013-11-07 02:55:06 PM  

MithrandirBooga: I would have replaced John Carter with Godzilla (1998). That movie was clearly designed to be turned into a sequel, with that ridiculous teaser ending. Thankfully it never happened.

John Carter wasn't terrible. It was decent, and a lot better than most crap that has endless sequels these days.


This

It was not nearly as bad as the article states but the title was terrible, it still deserves a sequel since it made a ton in DVD sales and overseas.
 
2013-11-07 02:55:13 PM  
The only thing Golden Compass had going was Daniel Craig and Sam Elliot.
 
2013-11-07 02:55:57 PM  
BTW, the American reboot of Godzilla is due out in May of 2014, and from what I've seen, it's a somewhat more traditional look.

http://godzilla.wikia.com/wiki/Godzilla_(2014_film)
 
2013-11-07 02:56:00 PM  

MithrandirBooga: However this is becoming an increasingly large problem with most blockbusters nowadays. 3 of the top 10 movie flops of all time were released just this summer (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_box_office_bombs#Biggest_box_of fi ce_bombs ); Hollywood has got to stop spending so much money on gigantic films and spending money on smaller niche films. This idea that every movie has to appeal to everyone is watering down films so much that it's actually turning off most viewers.


There are some decent movies on that list, sadly. Hugo may have been a little overrated by critics (as are all movies about movies) but it was still decent. Treasure Planet really wasn't bad either.
 
2013-11-07 02:56:31 PM  
i171.photobucket.com

There's 20 of these farkers.
 
2013-11-07 02:58:24 PM  

whereisian: Master and Commander was an amazing movie. I wish more like it were made.


It's one of my favorites.
 
2013-11-07 02:59:45 PM  

ArkPanda: dittybopper: OK, now, this is odd:
Cowboys and Aliens (2011)
Harrison Ford as the iron-fisted Colonel Dolarhyde and Daniel Craig as a stranger with no memory of his past in Cowboys & Aliens.
Timothy White / Universal Studios and DreamWorks II
Source: Scott Mitchell Rosenberg's graphic novel
Budget: $163 million
Domestic Gross: $100 million
Post-Mortem: The title seemed like a no-brainer, and yet the movie failed to deliver even on the fun promised by those three words. Even with $75 million in overseas grosses, the movie failed to recoup its costs.

Correct me if I'm wrong, but if the film cost $163 million, made $100 million domestically, and an additional $75 million overseas, then it made $175 million total, which, last time I checked, was more than $163 million.

I actually liked the film, btw, but it's not really sequel material anyway.  There really wasn't anywhere to go with it, except having more alienses invade the West.

Rule of thumb is you always divide by two.  About half the gross goes to the theaters, distributors, etc.  So a $163 million movie needs to make $326 million to be successful for the studio.


Basically everything loses money, just ask Art Buchwald.
 
2013-11-07 03:08:14 PM  
Nobody's mentioned Mac and Me? They threatened us with a sequel at the end of that movie.
 
2013-11-07 03:23:19 PM  

steve_wmn: Jake Leg: I've often wondered if those who hate John Carter so much have actually seen it. I went into it thinking it was going to stink, and found it to be pretty damn enjoyable. It is a fun, entertaining and well made diversion - what more could you ask for? Sure it was flop, but that doesn't make it a bad movie. Disney just screwed the release because they had no idea how to market it, same as they did with Lone Ranger (which I also thought was a decent action flick).

The marketing didn't help.  It made it look like Tarzan versus the critters in the pit from Star Wars Episode II.  But good reviews or good word of mouth might've overcome that.  That would've required a more compelling plot.  But the plot was overcomplicated with too many alien bad guys and no time to sort them all out.


I didn't see it in the theaters either.  As you said, the marketing was freaking horrible.  I honestly thought it was a g-rated children's movie from the tv advertisements.
 
2013-11-07 03:25:58 PM  

Jake Leg: I've often wondered if those who hate John Carter so much have actually seen it. I went into it thinking it was going to stink, and found it to be pretty damn enjoyable. It is a fun, entertaining and well made diversion - what more could you ask for? Sure it was flop, but that doesn't make it a bad movie. Disney just screwed the release because they had no idea how to market it, same as they did with Lone Ranger (which I also thought was a decent action flick).


The main problem with John Carter is it had 100% less dong than the books.
 
2013-11-07 03:35:15 PM  

mechgreg: JayCab: It at least lives on today as my "official movie to test the sound system" whenever I upgrade/move the home theater setup. The opening, up through the battle, is great to put speakers through its paces.

That's funny, that is totally what I use that movie for too. It is amazing how during pretty much the whole movie you can constantly hear the creak of the ship and the splashing of waves against the boat just faintly, but not enough to over power any talking. Plus the sound of the wood cracking when cannons hit is awesome.


Same here.  It's got the clearest multi-channel, positional audio and lots of low frequency.  And a good movie to boot.

I don't get all the hate for the Broderick Godzilla; I mean it's no masterpiece, but it's a fine popcorn munching monster movie.  My guess is the rabid fans of Japanese Godzilla movies would have been fine with it as a monster movie if only it didn't have the Godzilla name stamped on it.
 
2013-11-07 03:57:15 PM  
Just wanted to drop in and say I liked Speed Racer

/Never saw the cartoon.
//Watch back to back with Killer Joe
 
2013-11-07 03:59:14 PM  

cirby: bungle_jr:
but at any rate, it at least broke even, according to this stat.

You're forgetting "Hollywood Accounting 101."

Any movie that loses money is a disaster.

Any movie that breaks even is a huge money loser.

Any money that seems to show a profit is also actually a big money loser, and you'll probably never see a dime from it, even if the studio has to invent expenses to make that happen.

New Line swore up and down that the Lord of the Rings lost money. Really.

Warner Brothers said Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix - a movie that grossed $600 million - lost $167 million.

The king of this might be "Return of the Jedi." It cost $32 million to make in 1983. It grossed $475 million. It still hasn't shown a profit.


Forest Gump lost money.
When the studio came to the author (who had a cut of the net, so nothing) to ask about doing Gump & Co, he said that he could not sell them another story that would lose them money.
 
Ant
2013-11-07 04:00:02 PM  
I want a Golden Compass sequel. Maybe a reboot.

/if you think the church in the Golden Compass in any way reflects your church, you belong to one really farked up church!
 
2013-11-07 04:01:25 PM  

SinisterDexter: I don't get all the hate for the Broderick Godzilla; I mean it's no masterpiece, but it's a fine popcorn munching monster movie.  My guess is the rabid fans of Japanese Godzilla movies would have been fine with it as a monster movie if only it didn't have the Godzilla name stamped on it.


Exactly.

And the people who weren't Godzilla fans stayed away because "Oh, another rubber suit monster movie".

So you ended up with a film that had no constituency, but in fact it is a pretty darn good giant monster movie.  I mean, we're not talking "Doctor Zhivago", here, but within its genre, it's a decent effort.
 
2013-11-07 04:04:56 PM  

Car_Ramrod: I liked Cowboys & Aliens...


It did have at least one redeeming feature:

mattcampbellart.com

Olivia Wilde nude is always a selling point, even if it is only implied.
 
2013-11-07 04:20:22 PM  
Missing from the list:
www.entertainmentwallpaper.com

/Most blatant sequel setup since Buckaroo Banzai
 
2013-11-07 05:36:55 PM  

DjangoStonereaver: Car_Ramrod: I liked Cowboys & Aliens...

It did have at least one redeeming feature:

[mattcampbellart.com image 800x343]

Olivia Wilde nude is always a selling point, even if it is only implied.


So sad. People get excited about the thought of nudity to the point that becomes a positive argument for a super huge piece of shiat movie?
 
2013-11-07 05:52:30 PM  
Master & Commander is an amazing movie! It's in my top 5 of all time.

puckrock2000: Missing from the list:
[www.entertainmentwallpaper.com image 850x680]

/Most blatant sequel setup since Buckaroo Banzai


I actually really enjoyed Sorcerer's Apprentice. I expected crap and was very pleasantly surprised.
 
2013-11-07 05:53:10 PM  

Satanic_Hamster: steve_wmn: Jake Leg: I've often wondered if those who hate John Carter so much have actually seen it. I went into it thinking it was going to stink, and found it to be pretty damn enjoyable. It is a fun, entertaining and well made diversion - what more could you ask for? Sure it was flop, but that doesn't make it a bad movie. Disney just screwed the release because they had no idea how to market it, same as they did with Lone Ranger (which I also thought was a decent action flick).

The marketing didn't help.  It made it look like Tarzan versus the critters in the pit from Star Wars Episode II.  But good reviews or good word of mouth might've overcome that.  That would've required a more compelling plot.  But the plot was overcomplicated with too many alien bad guys and no time to sort them all out.

I didn't see it in the theaters either.  As you said, the marketing was freaking horrible.  I honestly thought it was a g-rated children's movie from the tv advertisements.


There was some speculation around here that Disney bombed the advertising on purpose to sabotage the movie because they knew at that point they were buying star wars and didn't want to have two sci-fi franchises self competing.

Who knows how true that is.
 
2013-11-07 05:54:56 PM  

dittybopper: frepnog: dittybopper: You know that almost all of the scenes in Jurassic Park featuring the raptors, they were puppets, right?

dudes in suits, captain of wrong.  dudes in suits.

http://www.stanwinstonschool.com/blog/jurassic-park-evolution-of-a-r ap tor-suit

Same thing.  They were practical effects, not CGI for almost the entire film, which was my point.


They were originallt stop motion puppets. There's a screen test on the DVD of them. They were creepy. Had flicking tongues and shiat. I guess when they switched to CGI half way through production they figured that guys in suits would be less jarring against CGI than the jerky motion of stop motion.
 
2013-11-07 05:55:45 PM  

IdBeCrazyIf: Mugato: Remember the competing Mars movies that came out at the same time, Mission to Mars and Red Planet? Yeah, they sucked too.

I almost walked out of that one, I stuck through till the end and then we it got to the got damn insect part I wanted to go get a plane ticket to LA just so I could find the writers and kick them in the junk


I walked out on that movie and I was watching it in my own home.
 
2013-11-07 05:56:44 PM  

Slaves2Darkness: Exactly. It's like the people biatching about the Speed Racer movie never ever saw the horrible one dimensional cartoon that my 8 year old self loved. I mean honestly the cartoon was crap, utter and complete crap, and you had to be a little boy to enjoy it.

The movie was fun, but Susan Sarandon and John Goodman make that movie into something that was awesome.

Speed Racer

was exactly what it was intended to be... and a whole lot more.  Way too much more.  If they'd cut about half an hour out, it would have been a much tighter and better movie.

Still, I enjoyed it, and I too believe a lot of its negative criticism and box office disappointment was simply backlash against the Matrix sequels.  I suspect Cloud Atlas had a similar backlash, which is a shame since that one actually got a lot of positive reviews.
 
2013-11-07 06:07:42 PM  

Ned Stark: There was some speculation around here that Disney bombed the advertising on purpose to sabotage the movie because they knew at that point they were buying star wars and didn't want to have two sci-fi franchises self competing.

Who knows how true that is.


Sounds like a crazy theory but so is the notion that Disney unintentionally can't market something
 
2013-11-07 06:08:33 PM  

Ned Stark: There was some speculation around here that Disney bombed the advertising on purpose to sabotage the movie because they knew at that point they were buying star wars and didn't want to have two sci-fi franchises self competing.

Who knows how true that is.


Seems kind of dumb.  They could have pushed the movie better and then just ignored doing a sequel.  I seriously thought it was a little kids movie from the ads.
 
2013-11-07 06:14:12 PM  

Hebalo: DjangoStonereaver: Car_Ramrod: I liked Cowboys & Aliens...

It did have at least one redeeming feature:

[mattcampbellart.com image 800x343]

Olivia Wilde nude is always a selling point, even if it is only implied.

So sad. People get excited about the thought of nudity to the point that becomes a positive argument for a super huge piece of shiat movie?


You take what you can get where you can get it.  In full disclosure, I haven't seen C&A, but would like to one day
and not just because of Ms. Wilde, who I respect as an artist and health activist:

cdn.fd.uproxx.com
 
2013-11-07 06:19:09 PM  

DjangoStonereaver: You take what you can get where you can get it.  In full disclosure, I haven't seen C&A, but would like to one day
and not just because of Ms. Wilde, who I respect as an artist and health activist:


It's a fairly basic story about aliens invading the old west in search of gold (why is gold rare and valuable everywhere in the galaxy? Same with the Ferengi). And Harrison Ford mumbles and growls a lot.

Question: Who comes off as more bored in the movies they've done in the last 10 years, Harrison Ford or Bruce Willis? I personally don't give a shiat about Willis' movies anymore but I hope they shoot Ford up with something before they start Episode 7.
 
2013-11-07 06:27:13 PM  

NathanAllen: Jake Leg: I've often wondered if those who hate John Carter so much have actually seen it. I went into it thinking it was going to stink, and found it to be pretty damn enjoyable. It is a fun, entertaining and well made diversion - what more could you ask for? Sure it was flop, but that doesn't make it a bad movie. Disney just screwed the release because they had no idea how to market it, same as they did with Lone Ranger (which I also thought was a decent action flick).

The main problem with John Carter is it had 100% less dong than the books.


Didn't read the book but I enjoyed the movie. Granted I came in with low expectations, but it was a decent flick. After I watched it I went back online and was a bit saddened that there would never be a squeal, which could have been better. Then I realized that rarely happens and quickly forgot about the movie.
 
2013-11-07 06:28:33 PM  

Mugato: DjangoStonereaver: You take what you can get where you can get it.  In full disclosure, I haven't seen C&A, but would like to one day
and not just because of Ms. Wilde, who I respect as an artist and health activist:

It's a fairly basic story about aliens invading the old west in search of gold (why is gold rare and valuable everywhere in the galaxy? Same with the Ferengi). And Harrison Ford mumbles and growls a lot.

Question: Who comes off as more bored in the movies they've done in the last 10 years, Harrison Ford or Bruce Willis? I personally don't give a shiat about Willis' movies anymore but I hope they shoot Ford up with something before they start Episode 7.


Harrison Ford hands down. He's been phoning it in for years. Now I haven't seen Ender's Game yet, but I'll assume he's the exact same as all the other roles.

At least Bruce Willis had fun with RED. That was a great movie. But I heard the sequel kinda sucked.
 
2013-11-07 06:30:51 PM  

Mugato: why is gold rare and valuable everywhere in the galaxy


Gold is rare because it's pretty hard to make. In fact, our sun can't make it. All the gold in our universe is created when suns go supernova, and our sun is too small to do even that. It's valuable because it's pretty and very malleable and doesn't react with other elements to oxidize or tarnish.
 
2013-11-07 06:35:09 PM  
Speed Racer wasn't bad at all, if you viewed it as a live action cartoon with cartoon physics.

/more like a NONja
 
2013-11-07 06:48:11 PM  

Mike Chewbacca: Mugato: why is gold rare and valuable everywhere in the galaxy

Gold is rare because it's pretty hard to make. In fact, our sun can't make it. All the gold in our universe is created when suns go supernova, and our sun is too small to do even that. It's valuable because it's pretty and very malleable and doesn't react with other elements to oxidize or tarnish.


OK, I'll buy that I guess.


scottydoesntknow: Question: Who comes off as more bored in the movies they've done in the last 10 years, Harrison Ford or Bruce Willis? I personally don't give a shiat about Willis' movies anymore but I hope they shoot Ford up with something before they start Episode 7.

Harrison Ford hands down. He's been phoning it in for years. Now I haven't seen Ender's Game yet, but I'll assume he's the exact same as all the other roles.

At least Bruce Willis had fun with RED. That was a great movie. But I heard the sequel kinda sucked.


I guess for me it's that Bruce Willis sort of forgot to play John McClane. And I don't think Harrison Ford did too bad with Indy 4, given the script he was given. But he has looked bored or irritated in everything else he's been in since I dunno, Air Force One.
 
2013-11-07 07:19:31 PM  

sign_of_Zeta: Speed Racer was no masterpiece but it was exactly what a Speed Racer movie should have been.  I thoroughly enjoyed the movie, and in fact, I am going to go buy it today.  Thanks subby.


I did too. I thought it was a fun and entertaining watch. The camera angles and effects were awesome and Christina Ricci looked amazing in that movie. Top it off with john Goodman as pops and a crazy monkey up to crazy antics. Sign me up for a sequel right now.

Also thought john carter was much better than most people gave it credit for.
 
2013-11-07 07:31:15 PM  

Gleeman: Speed Racer wasn't bad at all, if you viewed it as a live action cartoon with cartoon physics.

/more like a NONja


If you liked Speed Racer (or if you didn't, but like the idea of a hyper-kinetic racing animated movie) you should check out Redline.
 
2013-11-07 08:06:13 PM  

Skyrmion: Gleeman: Speed Racer wasn't bad at all, if you viewed it as a live action cartoon with cartoon physics.

/more like a NONja

If you liked Speed Racer (or if you didn't, but like the idea of a hyper-kinetic racing animated movie) you should check out Redline.


Already own it. When I recommend it to friends/family  I say that it is 50% 'Beyond the Impossible', 50% awesome and 50% testosterone.
 
2013-11-07 09:10:50 PM  

Hebalo: DjangoStonereaver: Car_Ramrod: I liked Cowboys & Aliens...

It did have at least one redeeming feature:

[mattcampbellart.com image 800x343]

Olivia Wilde nude is always a selling point, even if it is only implied.

So sad. People get excited about the thought of nudity to the point that becomes a positive argument for a super huge piece of shiat movie?


With that I would have to wonder if you even saw the movie. It might not have been the biggest blockbuster of the year, but it was far from being a piece of shiat.
 
2013-11-07 10:16:01 PM  
I'm still waiting for the next Breakin' movie. Dammit, I want to know what happened to Kelly!!!
 
2013-11-07 11:52:54 PM  

sign_of_Zeta: Speed Racer was no masterpiece but it was exactly what a Speed Racer movie should have been.  I thoroughly enjoyed the movie, and in fact, I am going to go buy it today.  Thanks subby.


Slaves2Darkness: yves0010: Speed Racer was awesome! My nephew and I watch it all the time. Saw it in theaters day 1 and bought the DvD day 1 as well. Then again, I have always been a Speed Racer fan so that would be no surprise. I want another Speed Racer movie. It was very well done and kept the campiness of the original show.

Exactly. It's like the people biatching about the Speed Racer movie never ever saw the horrible one dimensional cartoon that my 8 year old self loved. I mean honestly the cartoon was crap, utter and complete crap, and you had to be a little boy to enjoy it.

The movie was fun, but Susan Sarandon and John Goodman make that movie into something that was awesome.


thatguyoverthere70: I'm in the Speed Racer fan club too. I thought it was a great movie, and I'm pretty picky. It has great visuals and each of the races are fun. Come on, any movie with a beehive catapult should get an automatic pass.

Beehive. Catapult.

And it has an extended flash forward. That's something you just don't see in movies, pretty much ever.

I'll have to bust out the movie tonight too. Subby is inspiring!


This This This. I thought they did a fantastic job translating the cartoon into live action.

//Although the skittles comment above did make me  laugh
 
2013-11-08 01:27:16 AM  

FeedTheCollapse: Skyline demands a recount


for what's it worth, maybe it's because it got really bad reviews, but I didn't think Skyline was that bad; probably a bit too presumptuous that it would get a sequel, though.



THIS.
 
2013-11-08 02:39:06 AM  
Master and Commander is pretty fine film.
 
2013-11-08 07:18:15 AM  

ReapTheChaos: Hebalo: DjangoStonereaver: Car_Ramrod: I liked Cowboys & Aliens...

It did have at least one redeeming feature:

[mattcampbellart.com image 800x343]

Olivia Wilde nude is always a selling point, even if it is only implied.

So sad. People get excited about the thought of nudity to the point that becomes a positive argument for a super huge piece of shiat movie?

With that I would have to wonder if you even saw the movie. It might not have been the biggest blockbuster of the year, but it was far from being a piece of shiat.


This.

I liked it.  It's not what I consider a great film, but it's decent enough for an alien invasion film.

Daniel Craig and Harrison Ford were especially good in it.   Remove the aliens from the film, and people would think it was an excellent western.
 
2013-11-08 08:33:33 AM  

MithrandirBooga: bungle_jr: also, listing a movie that was released THIS YEAR in a listicle about being spared a sequel? come on! they could be working on a sequel that we haven't even heard of yet!

Lone Ranger bombed so hard it may have repercussions on Johnny Depp's career. There's no way there's going to be a sequel. It lost almost $200m


I think LR could be 'fixed' by cutting out all the stupid jar jaresque scenes like the horse in the tree. What's left would be better. Maybe not good, but I doubt it would've bombed so hard.
 
2013-11-08 08:36:51 AM  

Riotboy: FeedTheCollapse: Skyline demands a recount


for what's it worth, maybe it's because it got really bad reviews, but I didn't think Skyline was that bad; probably a bit too presumptuous that it would get a sequel, though.


THIS.


the issue with skyline was that they blew the budget on effects and ignored the fact that you need decent acting to make the effects look convincing.

it was a decent invasion movie.  Battle:LA and Battleship were both better at that tho.
 
2013-11-08 11:15:36 AM  
The only movie on that list that I wish had a sequel is Master & Commander.  Excellent movie.
 
2013-11-08 03:28:44 PM  

ReapTheChaos: Hebalo: DjangoStonereaver: Car_Ramrod: I liked Cowboys & Aliens...

It did have at least one redeeming feature:

[mattcampbellart.com image 800x343]

Olivia Wilde nude is always a selling point, even if it is only implied.

So sad. People get excited about the thought of nudity to the point that becomes a positive argument for a super huge piece of shiat movie?

With that I would have to wonder if you even saw the movie. It might not have been the biggest blockbuster of the year, but it was far from being a piece of shiat.


What, because I disagree with your opinion of the movie, I can't possibly have seen it? I did. It was bad...like stinky, awful bad. Like, I'm glad I didn't pay to see this bad. I had high hopes, but they were quickly quashed.
 
2013-11-08 06:17:20 PM  
Master and Commander was great and had a great score to boot, mostly classical pieces mixed with some tribal and original.   Was never clear on why there wasn't a sequel, but the article explains it pretty well.

To me it felt like a more old school film, using suspense and what you don't see as the main plot elements, rather than showy CGI that is obvious.
  -M
 
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