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(Daily Mail)   Do you feel overqualified in your position as Mobile Sustenance Facilitator? Well, perhaps Highway Environmental Hygienist or Media Distribution Officer would be more suited to your skill set   (dailymail.co.uk) divider line 18
    More: Stupid, recruitment consultants, job titles, Mr Smith, waste collector, vacuum, call centers, jobseeker, facilitators  
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1347 clicks; posted to Business » on 07 Nov 2013 at 7:09 AM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



18 Comments   (+0 »)
   
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest
 
2013-11-07 07:21:29 AM  
I recently acquired a new position as a telephone sanitizer. That allowed me to secure one of the coveted spots on Ark-A. Yep, it's a bright future for me!
 
2013-11-07 08:33:27 AM  
Where I work, "receptionist" == "Lobby Ambassador"
 
2013-11-07 09:16:39 AM  
"Analyst." It's whatever we say you do.
 
2013-11-07 09:30:29 AM  
We're hiring at Nidus. Anyone know a good sandhog or cat's meats man?
 
2013-11-07 10:02:39 AM  
How about 'junior entertainment manager'...
 
2013-11-07 10:05:27 AM  
A long time ago one of the local convenience store chains no longer had cashiers, they had CSR's or Customer Service Representatives.
 
2013-11-07 11:16:00 AM  

Fabric_Man: "Analyst." It's whatever we say you do.


Except actual analysis. That's one thing you'll hardly ever see an analyst do.
 
2013-11-07 12:36:57 PM  
My company used to do this but recently changed a bunch of job titles (including mine) back to their boring roots. I'm only slightly annoyed because my new title, Client Support Specialist, not only makes it sound like I'm much further down the totem pole than I am, its also a pretty inaccurate description of my job.
 
2013-11-07 12:55:18 PM  
i234.photobucket.com
 
2013-11-07 01:54:21 PM  
The Brits are always writing me to "action" things - they want "deliverables" strictly as described in their "discussion decks".

/"gag"
 
2013-11-07 02:18:15 PM  
thumbs.anyclip.com

Thurgood Jenkins: So, now we all live together in New York. I myself, am a master of the custodial arts. Or a janitor, if you wanna be a dick about it.
 
2013-11-07 02:36:22 PM  
upload.wikimedia.org

I am a Waste Management Artisan.
 
2013-11-07 03:09:00 PM  

barefoot in the head: The Brits are always writing me to "action" things - they want "deliverables" strictly as described in their "discussion decks".

/"gag"


I once heard somebody say that he was "efforting that". Wasn't a Brit, though.
 
2013-11-07 04:56:13 PM  

barefoot in the head: The Brits are always writing me to "action" things - they want "deliverables" strictly as described in their "discussion decks".

/"gag"



It's the shiatty management jargon that gets taught on manager away days so that they can sound like they know what they are doing. It's the English version of the crap US MBA's spout.

/We have Teenage Pregnancy Coordinators
//Alcohol Abuse Officers
///Yes we are local government
 
2013-11-07 05:52:38 PM  
The filters will mangle this, but here is a BS job title generator:

http://www.bullshiatjob.com/title/

Change this "s" word to what it should be when doing the copy/pasta

Best Regards,
LeroyB
Legacy Configuration Associate
 
2013-11-07 05:58:57 PM  
Update: The filters filtered what gets displayed but the link itself isn't filtered.

No copy/pasta required

Best Regards,
LeroyB
Global Paradigm Technician
 
2013-11-07 06:27:35 PM  

NeverUseAbsolutes: Where I work, "receptionist" == "Lobby Ambassador"


I saw one a few weeks ago or a Director of First Impressions.  It was...a receptionist position.


Also, as someone who is currently seeking new employment, I cannot farking stand these stupid job titles.
 
2013-11-07 06:44:25 PM  
At a job I had years ago I was pretty much everybody's assistant. I was going to have them put on my cards "Everyone's assistant" but I settled on "Positive Vibe Tech" I stole that from a band, not telling you who.

The most BS job interview I went to was for a face to face marketing job. Found out later when they had me in the field it was door to door sales.
 
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