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(The Raw Story)   Why are young men increasingly spurning marriage and fatherhood in favor of "Porn, beer, video games with the guys, freedom and fleeting sexual encounters"? Because gays, of course, duh   (rawstory.com ) divider line
    More: Dumbass, Maggie Gallagher, Human sexual activity, political freedom, same-sex marriages, video games, Terry McAuliffe  
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2980 clicks; posted to Politics » on 06 Nov 2013 at 5:40 PM (2 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2013-11-06 06:27:35 PM  

DarwiOdrade: Smelly McUgly: Because family law means that if your marriage fails, you're 2/7ths of a dad AND destroyed financially, where at least if you are a woman, you're destroyed financially, but you still have your kids.

It isn't gay dudes, they always want to play WiiU, and I'm like "ZombiU sucks, I'd rather play GTA V."

Unless we're talking about gay dudes with PCs. I would hang out with them based on our apparent shared love of Civilization, at least based on the small sample size of gay, PC-game playing dudes that I know.

What were we talking about again?

Add one more to your sample of gay, PC-game playing dudes who love Civ. My new liquid-cooled rig arrives any day. :D


fc02.deviantart.net
Glorious PC guy looks faaaaaaabulous!
 
2013-11-06 06:29:16 PM  
My ex got hooked on drugs, cost us about $40,000 while we were married, and STILL got the court to take me for 6-figures in the divorce.

I now have money, freedom, and women 10 years my junior chasing me on a daily basis.  Fark marriage.
 
2013-11-06 06:30:09 PM  
Could it also be young women are in no hurry to "settle down" as well?

Maybe some large scale economic uncertainty?

Wait, no, it's the gays.
 
2013-11-06 06:30:35 PM  
I think the issue is well, we grew up hearing from our parents how they wish they had gone to school frist, or lived life before getting tied down, or did this or that, etc.
 
2013-11-06 06:33:36 PM  
Yeah, like she's an expert on sex.
 
2013-11-06 06:33:56 PM  
Why buy the cow when you can get the milk for free?
 
2013-11-06 06:38:28 PM  

theknuckler_33: ladodger34: I was 30 when I got married and my wife was 27. I think 30 was a good age. The porn, beer, and video games sounds like my 20s and I had a great time. I think having some fun before I got married has made me a better husband and dad.

This. I was 32, my wife was 28. We have 1 child, a daughter, she's 11 now.

/my lawn, etc.


There is definitely some truth in that. But I'm married and I still play video games (and RPGs, and board games, and card games) on a very regular basis. It's almost like my spouse is my best friend!
 
2013-11-06 06:39:18 PM  
Let's do the math.

If you get married, have some kids, buy a house (get a mortgage), you are supposed to be happy.  Except your wife could suddenly decide that her life is not fullfilling and she divorces you.  She takes the house (you get the mortgage, though), the car (you get the payments), the kids (you will pay child support).  Oh, and good luck getting time with your kids.  She might decide you don't and the family courts rarely do anything if a woman violates the agreement.  If a man did all of these things to his wife for the exact same reason, he would denounced as worse than Hitler.

Or you can stay single.  You can do what the fark you want when you want.  You don't have a wife and kids that suck your wallet dry.  You can tell your boss "no, I'm not working this weekend" because you don't have to suck up because of your family responsibilities.
 
2013-11-06 06:41:35 PM  

AngryDragon: I now have money, freedom, and women 10 years my junior chasing me on a daily basis. Fark marriage.


I wish I could get some women 10 years my junior to chase me.  Unfortunately, I don't exactly have good looks.   The claim that having money is enough is a lie unless you have a SHIATLOAD of money.
 
2013-11-06 06:41:47 PM  

Mr. Shabooboo: Carn: The author of this article has clearly not played Fallout or Skyrim.

"I was a heterosexual Christian like you, until i took a penis to the butt."


I do not want to download that mod haha
 
2013-11-06 06:48:35 PM  

Smelly McUgly: Because family law means that if your marriage fails, you're 2/7ths of a dad AND destroyed financially, where at least if you are a woman, you're destroyed financially, but you still have your kids.

It isn't gay dudes, they always want to play WiiU, and I'm like "ZombiU sucks, I'd rather play GTA V."

Unless we're talking about gay dudes with PCs. I would hang out with them based on our apparent shared love of Civilization, at least based on the small sample size of gay, PC-game playing dudes that I know.

What were we talking about again?


I hope that you're not saying that playing Civilization makes you gay, because I love that game and I really can't afford a divorce. My kids would be pretty disappointed too.
 
2013-11-06 06:48:48 PM  
Oh Maggie Gallagher = the twunt who wants to TELL you about so-called "traditional" marriage.

Except Gallagher is her MAIDEN name. Her married name - that she doesn't use is Srivastav. You never see her and her husband in the same room at any of these gatherings - you'd notice because he'd stand out from most of the audience, given that Srivastav ain't exactly an Irish surname.

So she's basically a hypocrite and a liar; I don't understand why no one in the media isn't calling her on this with every one of her press releases.
 
2013-11-06 06:49:34 PM  

Smelly McUgly: Because family law means that if your marriage fails, you're 2/7ths of a dad AND destroyed financially, where at least if you are a woman, you're destroyed financially, but you still have your kids.

It isn't gay dudes, they always want to play WiiU, and I'm like "ZombiU sucks, I'd rather play GTA V."

Unless we're talking about gay dudes with PCs. I would hang out with them based on our apparent shared love of Civilization, at least based on the small sample size of gay, PC-game playing dudes that I know.

What were we talking about again?


How either Brave New World or my own play style suck donkey balls.

/probably the latter, *sigh*
 
2013-11-06 06:51:32 PM  
i think i get more enjoyment out of other peoples children than i would my own (if i had any), for the simple fact that i can hand the kid over to the parent when the kid gets all uppity.

marriage is just some scam to have an additional target that creditors can attack when they aren't getting their interest payment.
 
2013-11-06 06:52:03 PM  
A big part of it probably is because the current young generation was basically raised to be selfish-raised this way by the same people now complaining about it. However, there are serious economic and social barriers. Unless you can be cheap and find someone else who is also cheap (and also have at least decent-ish jobs), it'll be tough. Plus many people have student loans, high medical expenses, and so forth.

Another fact is just that people are living much longer. Now, this doesn't mean you can just have kids later on-women get menopause, and men start to produce less-than-stellar material after a certain age. However, people are sometimes reluctant to commit themselves to something that might last 70 years. I wouldn't be surprised if we start seeing things like 10-year/20-year marriage licenses in our lifetimes.

One problem is that people tend to be sold a false bill of goods. They're told: "get married and have kids, you'll be happy!" And sometimes, this is true. I honestly think that responsible and happily married parents are among the most commendable people today.

There's also the risk of putting in so much monetary and emotional investment into a partner only to have them turn out to be a terrible person. This is true of kids, too. S

So there are a lot of factors involved, and a lot of uncertainty.
 
2013-11-06 06:56:21 PM  

doglover: themindiswatching: doglover: themindiswatching: It costs less than $100 to get married at the courthouse.

No, it costs upwards of half a million dollars or more over the next 18 years to raise a kid and even more to send 'em to college.

Don't be obtuse you jackaninny. You know what I meant.

You're not required to have kids after getting married.

And yet ....

Thus we get the situation in the article. Ideally you just get married for love and nothing else, but numbers don't lie baby. Look at Japan. Some asshole actually wrote an article about there being no sex over here. False. Actually, there's just no marriage because it's too expensive.


I keep looking at the option of working overtime or having a social life, and remembering how despite 5 years of trying to build my savings to the point I can actually put money IN to my savings accounts/stocks that I've had since I was 8 years old (no really) I'm still just breaking even and whenever I get up a ways random shiat (get rear-ended) knocks me back down.

Dating costs money, probably MORE than marriage, most of us can't afford either, and those of us who don't relish going into debt, well...
 
2013-11-06 06:58:32 PM  
We're not spurning marriage, just the parenthood part.

/sure is funny to watch you get riled up over our personal lives though
 
2013-11-06 06:58:36 PM  
Gallagher believes men must lead all households, which must consist of a husband, a wife, and children and twinkies and pie and fried chicken and gravy and more gravy?


..young men are deciding the hard work of becoming marriageable is not worth it

Lady, that isn't why no one wants to fark you. You're a fat gross woman who doesn't want to do the hard work to be farkable.
 
2013-11-06 07:02:18 PM  

TheBigJerk: Dating costs money, probably MORE than marriage, most of us can't afford either, and those of us who don't relish going into debt, well...


Ignorance is bliss.
 
2013-11-06 07:06:57 PM  

MrSteve007: TheBigJerk: Dating costs money, probably MORE than marriage, most of us can't afford either, and those of us who don't relish going into debt, well...

Ignorance is bliss.


My marriage is pretty inexpensive. We have very similar hobbies, so that means we can often just buy one copy of something instead of two. Of course, we do have two XBox 360s and two televisions in our living room so we can play console games together, and we have two PCs (as well as a third "Dungeon Master" PC that we've got HeroLab and other game software on). But it's not like one of us is spending a bunch of the other's money. In most cases, it's stuff we'd have bought on our own if we were single.

Kids, on the other hand, are super farking expensive, and that's part of why we don't have any.
 
2013-11-06 07:09:18 PM  

MrSteve007: TheBigJerk: Dating costs money, probably MORE than marriage, most of us can't afford either, and those of us who don't relish going into debt, well...

Ignorance is bliss.


Well, rumor has it folk are easier and cheaper to bed once you're married.

Other folk, not the one you married, obviously.
 
2013-11-06 07:10:34 PM  
Personally, it's the horror stories about divorce, the unfair treatments in the courts and how if I were to get married, I'd likely lose everything I've spent my life building that puts me off marriage. Well that and people telling me I HAVE to be married to be happy. I'm farking happy now how is the threat of losing everything gonna make that better?
 
2013-11-06 07:11:18 PM  
Yes, PacMan fever, bootleg liquor, and pin-up gals are keeping our younguns from popping out the next generation of conservatives to fight the Soviets, and it's all the homosexual-communist's fault. Do your duty: be a slut who doesn't use any of that commie birth control.
/Crazy lady's views in a nutshell.
 
2013-11-06 07:11:25 PM  

TheBigJerk: doglover: themindiswatching: doglover: themindiswatching: It costs less than $100 to get married at the courthouse.

No, it costs upwards of half a million dollars or more over the next 18 years to raise a kid and even more to send 'em to college.

Don't be obtuse you jackaninny. You know what I meant.

You're not required to have kids after getting married.

And yet ....

Thus we get the situation in the article. Ideally you just get married for love and nothing else, but numbers don't lie baby. Look at Japan. Some asshole actually wrote an article about there being no sex over here. False. Actually, there's just no marriage because it's too expensive.

I keep looking at the option of working overtime or having a social life, and remembering how despite 5 years of trying to build my savings to the point I can actually put money IN to my savings accounts/stocks that I've had since I was 8 years old (no really) I'm still just breaking even and whenever I get up a ways random shiat (get rear-ended) knocks me back down.

Dating costs money, probably MORE than marriage, most of us can't afford either, and those of us who don't relish going into debt, well...


Whatever you say, but the numbers are in and the studies are out. My hypothesis accurately models what goes on at a daily level and these studies. If you can find a woman to drag your ass out of debt? She's probably a keeper. I'd get the JoP on the horn asap if you ain't married already. For the rest of us? It is what it is because it's not just the boys who are selfish.
 
2013-11-06 07:12:09 PM  

Benevolent Misanthrope: Because they've grown up in an era of poor discipline, poor parenting, and instant gratification, coupled with the fact that either they've accepted the fact that they will never get laid, or that women will fark them without them having to buy the sex with financial stability.

Next question.


Or maybe they grew up in an era where marriages were made and broken in the course of a week and at least 50% end in divorce. They realize that if marriages don't work, they, the men, will probably get screwed financially. They see modern weddings as just an excuse to spend boat loads of money so that your friends can get drunk, rather than a solemn commitment to another human. They see all their predecessors slogging through miserable marriages. Etc, etc. Don't feel that kids are all that great.

But no, it's probably their lack of discipline and poor parenting. Jeez you sound old and grumpy. Am I right?
 
2013-11-06 07:12:30 PM  

EbolaNYC: Gallagher believes men must lead all households, which must consist of a husband, a wife, and children and twinkies and pie and fried chicken and gravy and more gravy?


..young men are deciding the hard work of becoming marriageable is not worth it

Lady, that isn't why no one wants to fark you. You're a fat gross woman who doesn't want to do the hard work to be farkable.


Young men are deciding that meeting the unreasonable expectations of marriage minded women is not worth it.
 
2013-11-06 07:13:10 PM  

commisioner: Personally, it's the horror stories about divorce, the unfair treatments in the courts and how if I were to get married, I'd likely lose everything I've spent my life building that puts me off marriage. Well that and people telling me I HAVE to be married to be happy. I'm farking happy now how is the threat of losing everything gonna make that better?


Yeah, it's a pretty safe bet that if you go into a marriage assuming it'll fail, it'll fail.
 
2013-11-06 07:17:09 PM  

Mike Chewbacca: commisioner: Personally, it's the horror stories about divorce, the unfair treatments in the courts and how if I were to get married, I'd likely lose everything I've spent my life building that puts me off marriage. Well that and people telling me I HAVE to be married to be happy. I'm farking happy now how is the threat of losing everything gonna make that better?

Yeah, it's a pretty safe bet that if you go into a marriage assuming it'll fail, it'll fail.


If I jump into a raging volcano with the expecation that I will die, I will probably die.
 
2013-11-06 07:17:53 PM  

Mike Chewbacca: commisioner: Personally, it's the horror stories about divorce, the unfair treatments in the courts and how if I were to get married, I'd likely lose everything I've spent my life building that puts me off marriage. Well that and people telling me I HAVE to be married to be happy. I'm farking happy now how is the threat of losing everything gonna make that better?

Yeah, it's a pretty safe bet that if you go into a marriage assuming it'll fail, it'll fail.


So how do you not assume it will fail if so many of the examples you've seen end up that way? You could keep telling yourself it'll work, but you won't really believe it.
 
2013-11-06 07:19:34 PM  

Richard C Stanford: Yes, PacMan fever, bootleg liquor, and pin-up gals are keeping our younguns from popping out the next generation of conservatives to fight the Soviets, and it's all the homosexual-communist's fault. Do your duty: be a slut who doesn't use any of that commie birth control.
/Crazy lady's views in a nutshell.


All this time I thought it was Green Lantern comics, Elvis the Pelvis and Lucille Ball saying "pregnant".
 
2013-11-06 07:20:00 PM  
There's also an element of being able to do the latter category on your own time, rather than being compelled to spend your personal time a certain way.  You can go out drinking and play games with the guys when you feel like it, but if you'd rather just hit the couch and watch Daily Show at the end of a long day, you can do that instead, with no pressure to choose one or the other.  With parenthood, your personal life is subsumed, and without kids, there just isn't that much real benefit to formal marriage over a long-term relationship and cohabitation.  She's not entirely wrong that there's been a societal shift, but it has nothing to do with sexual preference, and a lot more with the loss of stigma against the unmarried/childless.
 
2013-11-06 07:21:35 PM  

Mike Chewbacca: Yeah, it's a pretty safe bet that if you go into a marriage assuming it'll fail, it'll fail.


Gotta agree. If you're hesitant about marriage because you're worried about divorce, you're not dating the right girl, and your relationship is in no shape to survive a marriage.

Though I'm still of the opinion it's less fear of divorce and more financial ability and obligation that's leaving men stranded in a college student lifestyle than any fervent desire to remain there.
 
2013-11-06 07:22:59 PM  
A couple of weeks ago I called the office and said I was taking a week off, hopped on a plane, and went to Boston. Did you know Boston has many bars and loose women? I'm glad I don't have kids at my age (29) and the disposable income to enjoy that fact. Now this week I'm working double shifts and earning tons of overtime and royally screwing my sleep cycle. Which is fine since I'm hitting up a massive party this weekend.

Family and commitment to continuing your genetic lineage is not for everyone.
 
2013-11-06 07:24:32 PM  
Staying single has the advantages of being cheap and having fewer problems for most people.
 
2013-11-06 07:24:46 PM  

odinsposse: Smelly McUgly: Because family law means that if your marriage fails, you're 2/7ths of a dad AND destroyed financially, where at least if you are a woman, you're destroyed financially, but you still have your kids.

And if you aren't going to have kids then there are few real advantages to getting married in the first place.


At least if you don't get married or cohabitate you aren't on the hook paying for her standard of living (alimony or maintenance)
 
2013-11-06 07:26:51 PM  

doglover: TheBigJerk: doglover: themindiswatching: doglover: themindiswatching: It costs less than $100 to get married at the courthouse.

No, it costs upwards of half a million dollars or more over the next 18 years to raise a kid and even more to send 'em to college.

Don't be obtuse you jackaninny. You know what I meant.

You're not required to have kids after getting married.

And yet ....

Thus we get the situation in the article. Ideally you just get married for love and nothing else, but numbers don't lie baby. Look at Japan. Some asshole actually wrote an article about there being no sex over here. False. Actually, there's just no marriage because it's too expensive.

I keep looking at the option of working overtime or having a social life, and remembering how despite 5 years of trying to build my savings to the point I can actually put money IN to my savings accounts/stocks that I've had since I was 8 years old (no really) I'm still just breaking even and whenever I get up a ways random shiat (get rear-ended) knocks me back down.

Dating costs money, probably MORE than marriage, most of us can't afford either, and those of us who don't relish going into debt, well...

Whatever you say, but the numbers are in and the studies are out. My hypothesis accurately models what goes on at a daily level and these studies. If you can find a woman to drag your ass out of debt? She's probably a keeper. I'd get the JoP on the horn asap if you ain't married already. For the rest of us? It is what it is because it's not just the boys who are selfish.


I was agreeing with you.  Just taking it a point further.  ALL the trappings of life and love are expensive.
 
2013-11-06 07:28:19 PM  

Mike Chewbacca: commisioner: Personally, it's the horror stories about divorce, the unfair treatments in the courts and how if I were to get married, I'd likely lose everything I've spent my life building that puts me off marriage. Well that and people telling me I HAVE to be married to be happy. I'm farking happy now how is the threat of losing everything gonna make that better?

Yeah, it's a pretty safe bet that if you go into a marriage assuming it'll fail, it'll fail.


The divorce rate is around 50% I believe. Gives me one in two odds. Not great odds for a lifetime commitment. There's also no safety net for me if it does fail. Even properly done pre-nups (lawyers present, no duress, equal splitting of assets) are routinely thrown out.
 
2013-11-06 07:29:42 PM  

Sergeant Grumbles: Mike Chewbacca: Yeah, it's a pretty safe bet that if you go into a marriage assuming it'll fail, it'll fail.

Gotta agree. If you're hesitant about marriage because you're worried about divorce, you're not dating the right girl, and your relationship is in no shape to survive a marriage.

Though I'm still of the opinion it's less fear of divorce and more financial ability and obligation that's leaving men stranded in a college student lifestyle than any fervent desire to remain there.


I think that's a somewhat narrow view.  With society's current divorce rate, someone not recognizing that divorce is at least a possibility is kind of fooling themselves.  Doesn't mean you think it's likely, or that you can see things that would lead to it.  Knowing you love someone is perfectly reasonable, knowing for a fact how you'll feel in 20 years is fortune telling.
 
2013-11-06 07:33:45 PM  

Benevolent Misanthrope: Because they've grown up in an era of poor discipline, poor parenting, and instant gratification, coupled with the fact that either they've accepted the fact that they will never get laid, or that women will fark them without them having to buy the sex with financial stability.

Next question.


No moreso (besides the instant gratification) than previous generations.

Telos: timujin: Benevolent Misanthrope: Because they've grown up in an era of poor discipline, poor parenting, and instant gratification, coupled with the fact that either they've accepted the fact that they will never get laid, or that women will fark them without them having to buy the sex with financial stability.

Next question.

Yup, my poor discipline, poor parenting and love of instant gratification has led me to a life where i have my own place, a good job and, falling into the second of your options, a good sex life without the obligations that historically come with it.  And I'm not being snarky, I agree with your root argument, but I'm happy, too, so at least there's that.

You're not supposed to be happy, you're supposed to do what society expects of you.  Now go get married and have kids damnit!


This SEEMS to be the argument that some people are legitimately trying to make. USUALLY the people causing the lion's share of the problems in the first place...
 
2013-11-06 07:39:18 PM  
I don't understand how people can stand up for these issues without bothering to talk to people in these situations to find out what they're saying.  Jumping to a pet conclusion and selectively finding evidence to match is not bootstrappy at all.  It is farking lazy.
 
2013-11-06 07:42:25 PM  

optional: Mike Chewbacca: commisioner: Personally, it's the horror stories about divorce, the unfair treatments in the courts and how if I were to get married, I'd likely lose everything I've spent my life building that puts me off marriage. Well that and people telling me I HAVE to be married to be happy. I'm farking happy now how is the threat of losing everything gonna make that better?

Yeah, it's a pretty safe bet that if you go into a marriage assuming it'll fail, it'll fail.

So how do you not assume it will fail if so many of the examples you've seen end up that way? You could keep telling yourself it'll work, but you won't really believe it.


I grew up in an awful household. My parents fought all the time. They almost got divorced when I was in junior high, and I found out years later it was because my mom cheated on my dad. And before you judge my mom, my dad was an asshole and treated my mom like shiat. If ever there were two people who should have gotten a divorce, it was them. Really. I wish my parents had divorced decades ago. Now that my dad has passed, my mom is finally able to enjoy her life and her hobbies. Sure, she misses my dad. We're all thankful he had that 24-day period when he knew he was dying so he could tell my mom over and over again how much he really did love her. He treated her like shiat for 45+ years only to dote on her like a newlywed for the 24 days before he died.

And despite that, despite witnessing my parents terrible marriage that never should have been, I still chose to get married. I didn't get married at 20 like they did, and I didn't get married to the first person I fell in love with. I waited until I'd grown up all the way. I waited until I met someone who had the same interests as me, who wanted the same things out of life, who could appreciate me for who I am and what I do, and who I could appreciate.. I waited until I met the person who became my best friend, whose company I could enjoy every moment of every day for weeks on end. I essentially asked myself, "What would Mom and Dad do if they were in my shoes?" and then I did the exact opposite.

So yeah, you can be bitter and decide that marriage is too hard for you since it was too hard for that couple of there and that other couple over there and that third couple you know. Or, you can decide that if you marry the right person, it's amazing and fulfilling and enlightening rewarding and it makes life worth living and it means home is anywhere your spouse is regardless of what that home may look like.
 
2013-11-06 07:43:45 PM  
Your blog is not bad.
 
2013-11-06 07:44:14 PM  

Empty Matchbook: Benevolent Misanthrope: Because they've grown up in an era of poor discipline, poor parenting, and instant gratification, coupled with the fact that either they've accepted the fact that they will never get laid, or that women will fark them without them having to buy the sex with financial stability.

Next question.

No moreso (besides the instant gratification) than previous generations.

Telos: timujin: Benevolent Misanthrope: Because they've grown up in an era of poor discipline, poor parenting, and instant gratification, coupled with the fact that either they've accepted the fact that they will never get laid, or that women will fark them without them having to buy the sex with financial stability.

Next question.

Yup, my poor discipline, poor parenting and love of instant gratification has led me to a life where i have my own place, a good job and, falling into the second of your options, a good sex life without the obligations that historically come with it.  And I'm not being snarky, I agree with your root argument, but I'm happy, too, so at least there's that.

You're not supposed to be happy, you're supposed to do what society expects of you.  Now go get married and have kids damnit!

This SEEMS to be the argument that some people are legitimately trying to make. USUALLY the people causing the lion's share of the problems in the first place...


Meh, ya gotta ignore the haters
 
2013-11-06 07:47:28 PM  
Because marriage is a legal risk that has very little benefit or any payoff.

Children are a legal liability and everyone I know who has them is miserable.
 
2013-11-06 07:47:34 PM  

Last Man on Earth: I think that's a somewhat narrow view. With society's current divorce rate, someone not recognizing that divorce is at least a possibility is kind of fooling themselves. Doesn't mean you think it's likely, or that you can see things that would lead to it. Knowing you love someone is perfectly reasonable, knowing for a fact how you'll feel in 20 years is fortune telling.


I just don't think the fear of a marriage not working out in 20 years is stalling the marriage rate that significantly. That could very well be what it driving the divorce rate, but counting on a divorce in 20 years would also be fortune telling.
You see what I'm saying? No one gets married thinking they'll get divorced? So a fear of divorce might provide more thought to the decision to get married, but it's not actually stopping marriage from happening.
 
2013-11-06 07:49:13 PM  
A lot of women haters and haters of people who are younger in this thread. But the answer is pretty simple. Both men and women are realizing now that they don't have to be married to have sex. And also because the younger generation has seen their parent's generations sky high divorce rate they are putting off marriage and are having more relationships, that include sex, until they find the right person or they feel it is time for them to settle down. This is unlike earlier generations who gave in to the pressure of getting married and having a family early, even if the person wasn't exactly or even close to who they felt they should marry.
 
2013-11-06 07:49:29 PM  
Mike Chewbacca: Wise words

I admire your dedication and optimism. I don't think most people have it, or that they ever will.
 
2013-11-06 07:49:46 PM  
Because we qualify for Obamacare subisidies.
 
2013-11-06 07:50:20 PM  

Last Man on Earth: Sergeant Grumbles: Mike Chewbacca: Yeah, it's a pretty safe bet that if you go into a marriage assuming it'll fail, it'll fail.

Gotta agree. If you're hesitant about marriage because you're worried about divorce, you're not dating the right girl, and your relationship is in no shape to survive a marriage.

Though I'm still of the opinion it's less fear of divorce and more financial ability and obligation that's leaving men stranded in a college student lifestyle than any fervent desire to remain there.

I think that's a somewhat narrow view.  With society's current divorce rate, someone not recognizing that divorce is at least a possibility is kind of fooling themselves.  Doesn't mean you think it's likely, or that you can see things that would lead to it.  Knowing you love someone is perfectly reasonable, knowing for a fact how you'll feel in 20 years is fortune telling.


Don't think of divorce as society failing to uphold America's tradition of long marriages, think of it as Americans now having the freedom to escape bad situations. 50 years ago, women were much more financially dependent on their husbands. Divorce just wasn't a viable option to many women because they didn't work, or worked jobs that didn't pay enough to support themselves or their kids. Meanwhile, men felt trapped (which my dad did, even back in the late 80s) because their wives and kids depended on them to earn the lion's share of the household income. They knew if they divorced their wives, their wives and kids would be put into poverty.

Of course, divorce is still expensive, and so is being a single parent or the ex-husband of a single parent. It's still expensive. It's just not as financially devastating as it was 50 years ago. Not to mention there's much less stigma attached to being divorced than there once was.
 
2013-11-06 07:52:12 PM  

cgraves67: Because their own fathers seemed miserable while setting poor examples of what it is to be a husband and a father. Who wants to follow in the footsteps of misery and failure?


Son?
 
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