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(Talking Points Memo)   Yesterday, six counties voted overwhelmingly to secede from Colorado and form their own state. It isn't known yet what they plan to call their new conservative paradise as "Somalia" is already taken   (talkingpointsmemo.com ) divider line
    More: Stupid, Colorado, Somalia, counties voted, secession, party favors  
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3387 clicks; posted to Politics » on 06 Nov 2013 at 10:52 AM (3 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



146 Comments     (+0 »)
 
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2013-11-06 09:32:08 AM  
fark it. let 'em. give DC statehood to offset the two new derpbagger senators and congressman they'd no doubt send to washington. but i personally would love to see how these rubes govern themselves.
 
2013-11-06 09:34:32 AM  
You can split your senators with the existing state of Colorado, because we already have enough nut cases in DC.

And you don't have enough people to have a house member, I'm afraid.  So suck it.
 
2013-11-06 09:37:15 AM  
"Trailer Park" has a nice ring to it.
 
2013-11-06 09:40:43 AM  
Oh God, they're not going to want to join Kansas, are they?
 
2013-11-06 10:05:13 AM  
Salute to the Great State of Southeast Idaho
 
2013-11-06 10:20:20 AM  
I'm with FlashHarry.  Let 'em.  Offset them with DC Home Rule.  Done, and done.
 
2013-11-06 10:20:48 AM  
Maybe they will draw Texas' secessionists up there!! SECDEE, y'all!
 
2013-11-06 10:32:16 AM  
Meh,

Marcus Aurelius: You can split your senators with the existing state of Colorado, because we already have enough nut cases in DC.

And you don't have enough people to have a house member, I'm afraid.  So suck it.


Pretty sure each state is entitled to at least one representative, regardless of population.

Let's make them a territory instead of a state.
 
2013-11-06 10:41:40 AM  
So, by my quick math, if the 6 counties that did vote to secede from Colorado were, in fact, made into a new state, the population of said state would be around 29,000.

Excuse me while I laugh.
 
2013-11-06 10:49:23 AM  

serial_crusher: Meh, Marcus Aurelius: You can split your senators with the existing state of Colorado, because we already have enough nut cases in DC.

And you don't have enough people to have a house member, I'm afraid.  So suck it.

Pretty sure each state is entitled to at least one representative, regardless of population.

Let's make them a territory instead of a state.


I'm OK with that.
 
2013-11-06 10:54:59 AM  
North Colorado is Best Colorado
 
2013-11-06 10:55:15 AM  

Angry Drunk Bureaucrat: So, by my quick math, if the 6 counties that did vote to secede from Colorado were, in fact, made into a new state, the population of said state would be around 29,000.

Excuse me while I laugh.


That's a town.
 
2013-11-06 10:55:45 AM  
NO federal money.
 
2013-11-06 10:56:31 AM  
welcome to coloradeux

a wholly owned subsidiary of Wal-Mart Stores, Inc.
 
2013-11-06 10:57:20 AM  

shifty lookin bleeder: North Colorado is Best Colorado


Behold Glorious North Colorado! A beacon for business with zero taxes and no population or heavy infrastructure.
 
2013-11-06 10:57:45 AM  

Angry Drunk Bureaucrat: So, by my quick math, if the 6 counties that did vote to secede from Colorado were, in fact, made into a new state, the population of said state would be around 29,000.

Excuse me while I laugh.


And of course they would immediately vote to lower all their taxes by like 90% as well. Wonder how long they'd manage to keep basic infrastructure services going? 2 years?
 
2013-11-06 10:58:26 AM  

sprawl15: welcome to coloradeux

a wholly owned subsidiary of Wal-Mart Stores, Inc.


Coloraderp
 
2013-11-06 10:59:18 AM  
good luck with your infrastructure upkeep on that relatively vast expanse of land with taxes (or not?) from 30,000 people.
 
2013-11-06 10:59:21 AM  
Doesn't seem to be a problem for the Georgias.
 
2013-11-06 10:59:27 AM  
Teabagistan?
 
2013-11-06 11:00:05 AM  

jayhawk88: Angry Drunk Bureaucrat: So, by my quick math, if the 6 counties that did vote to secede from Colorado were, in fact, made into a new state, the population of said state would be around 29,000.

Excuse me while I laugh.

And of course they would immediately vote to lower all their taxes by like 90% as well. Wonder how long they'd manage to keep basic infrastructure services going? 2 years?


I doubt it.  With a tea party tax rate and that small a human population, it'd be like a zombie-less zombie apocalypse inside of a month.
 
2013-11-06 11:00:34 AM  

sprawl15: welcome to coloradeux

a wholly owned subsidiary of Wal-Mart Stores, Inc.


more like Exon

The primary reason for voting to leave was because of the attempts in Denver to heavily restrict fracking, which brings in a ton of money for these counties
 
2013-11-06 11:00:35 AM  
I'm fine with it as long as we wall them off too.  I think 100 feet tall ought to do it.
 
2013-11-06 11:00:36 AM  
How about no? Does that sound good to you?
 
2013-11-06 11:01:07 AM  
I'm still waiting for someone to latch onto the name Randtopia.  Maybe this could be it.
 
2013-11-06 11:01:12 AM  

FlashHarry: fark it. let 'em. give DC statehood to offset the two new derpbagger senators and congressman they'd no doubt send to washington. but i personally would love to see how these rubes govern themselves.


Isn't Puerto Rico on deck in the statehood lineup?
 
2013-11-06 11:01:23 AM  

Alphax: Angry Drunk Bureaucrat: So, by my quick math, if the 6 counties that did vote to secede from Colorado were, in fact, made into a new state, the population of said state would be around 29,000.

Excuse me while I laugh.

That's a town.


Uhhh...

One proposal I've seen has them adding a few counties from Kansas.
 
2013-11-06 11:01:30 AM  
i.imgur.com
 
2013-11-06 11:01:35 AM  
Article IV, section 3 (First clause):

New States may be admitted by the Congress into this Union; but no new State shall be formed or erected within the Jurisdiction of any other State; nor any State be formed by the Junction of two or more States, or Parts of States, without the Consent of the Legislatures of the States concerned as well as of the Congress.

I think the rest of the state gets a veto.  So no, not yours.  I'd ask the question "Are they stupid" but I already know the answer is "yes".
 
2013-11-06 11:01:37 AM  

Alphax: Angry Drunk Bureaucrat: So, by my quick math, if the 6 counties that did vote to secede from Colorado were, in fact, made into a new state, the population of said state would be around 29,000.

Excuse me while I laugh.

That's a town.


The population of Wyoming is about 20 times that.
 
2013-11-06 11:01:58 AM  

jayhawk88: Oh God, they're not going to want to join Kansas, are they?


The ones in the northeast want to be a new state, while the one in Colorado's northwest wants to become Wyoming's panhandle.
 
2013-11-06 11:02:14 AM  

Alphax: Angry Drunk Bureaucrat: So, by my quick math, if the 6 counties that did vote to secede from Colorado were, in fact, made into a new state, the population of said state would be around 29,000.

Excuse me while I laugh.

That's a town.


My county has a population of 1.7 million. 29,000 isn't even a town, it's a rounding error.
 
2013-11-06 11:02:32 AM  

jayhawk88: Angry Drunk Bureaucrat: So, by my quick math, if the 6 counties that did vote to secede from Colorado were, in fact, made into a new state, the population of said state would be around 29,000.

Excuse me while I laugh.

And of course they would immediately vote to lower all their taxes by like 90% as well. Wonder how long they'd manage to keep basic infrastructure services going? 2 years?


2 years? More like 2 months. Maybe.

Let 'em try. Once they find out that their state won't have ANY ability to get credit, they'll come running back.
 
2013-11-06 11:02:40 AM  
I should get my township with 30k people to secede from NJ. As long as local governments can claim powers delegated to Congress.

Plus I wouldn't have to be in NJ that way.
 
2013-11-06 11:03:28 AM  
Ok, so they succeed, but then they have to apply for statehood.
Until then they're just a territory like Johnson Atoll.  With no shared sovereignty with the federal government.
In other words you're Obama's biatch.
 
2013-11-06 11:03:36 AM  

Mrbogey: One proposal I've seen has them adding a few counties from Kansas.


Ha, do they promise?

Man you might as well just name that new state Derptania and get it over with. I'm sure they'll be super prosperous too once they drain the Ogallala dry.
 
2013-11-06 11:03:41 AM  
At least they're all contiguous.  Colorado would be very strange with one exclave county.
 
2013-11-06 11:04:07 AM  
t.fod4.com
 
2013-11-06 11:04:59 AM  
Will Glenn Beck be Governor?
 
2013-11-06 11:05:50 AM  

serial_crusher: Meh, Marcus Aurelius: You can split your senators with the existing state of Colorado, because we already have enough nut cases in DC.

And you don't have enough people to have a house member, I'm afraid.  So suck it.

Pretty sure each state is entitled to at least one representative, regardless of population.

Let's make them a territory instead of a state.


I think that's actually their only option.

Of course to successfully secede they'd need not only the standard approval of the state legislature and Congress, they'll have to amend the Colorado constitution, since it turns out our boundaries are right there in the first article. That means it has to pass a public ballot (you'd better try to piss the rest of the state off good real quick).

That just makes them a territory. To become a state, they'd need a bill through Congress, signed by the President.

Good luck, guys!
 
2013-11-06 11:06:39 AM  
secede?

more like fail

lol
 
2013-11-06 11:07:59 AM  
Yea, that worked so well for Puerto Rico.
 
2013-11-06 11:08:09 AM  

MadHatter500: Article IV, section 3 (First clause):

New States may be admitted by the Congress into this Union; but no new State shall be formed or erected within the Jurisdiction of any other State; nor any State be formed by the Junction of two or more States, or Parts of States, without the Consent of the Legislatures of the States concerned as well as of the Congress.

I think the rest of the state gets a veto.  So no, not yours.  I'd ask the question "Are they stupid" but I already know the answer is "yes".


Talk to Virginia about that.http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/West_Virginia
 
2013-11-06 11:08:27 AM  
Will the Taliban move in like they did in Iraq after we decimated the place? Or will it just be the Teahaddists?
 
2013-11-06 11:08:32 AM  
Let them join Wyoming.
 
2013-11-06 11:08:37 AM  

inglixthemad: shifty lookin bleeder: North Colorado is Best Colorado

Behold Glorious North Colorado! A beacon for business with zero taxes and no population or heavy infrastructure.


ALL CAMERAS WILL BE CONFISCATED AT THE BEGINNING OF THE TOUR - ABSOLUTELY NO PHOTOGRAPHS OF THE SOCIALIST FRONT RANGE WILL BE ALLOWED
 
2013-11-06 11:08:50 AM  

Peter von Nostrand: sprawl15: welcome to coloradeux

a wholly owned subsidiary of Wal-Mart Stores, Inc.

Coloraderp


A winner is you!
 
2013-11-06 11:08:58 AM  
I like this.

Let them secede and form their own country-not state, we get to vote to accept them as as state. Once they're a country we can declare a fake war against them and bomb the ever lovin shait our of them.
OR
We can let them starve.

While we're at it, can we please force Louisiana (my state) to secede as well. We far stupider than any colorados
 
2013-11-06 11:09:13 AM  
I live in The State of Jefferson, so I'm getting a kick...... We've got more bears than people where I live, but I guess we can get revenue by promoting tourism to the residents of Green Bay who would probably pay good money to watch a bunch of methbillies fark da bears. Cue the banjos.........
 
2013-11-06 11:09:58 AM  

MadHatter500: Article IV, section 3 (First clause):

New States may be admitted by the Congress into this Union; but no new State shall be formed or erected within the Jurisdiction of any other State; nor any State be formed by the Junction of two or more States, or Parts of States, without the Consent of the Legislatures of the States concerned as well as of the Congress.

I think the rest of the state gets a veto.  So no, not yours.  I'd ask the question "Are they stupid" but I already know the answer is "yes".


No, betting they rest of the state will allow them to split off. Why? They are leeching off the urban areas. So lower taxes for Colorado while the new area stays a territory under Federal jurisdiction because Congress is deadlocked. After a while they'll get tired of their shenanigans and try to go back to Colorado.
 
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