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(New Musical Express)   Geri Halliwell's comeback single sold exactly 393 copies   (nme.com) divider line 62
    More: Fail, Geri Halliwell, Australia's Got Talent, Life Sucks, Digital Spy  
•       •       •

6175 clicks; posted to Entertainment » on 05 Nov 2013 at 10:22 PM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



62 Comments   (+0 »)
   
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2013-11-05 07:56:11 PM  
But does she still have a nice rack?
 
2013-11-05 08:15:31 PM  
That's how many times I would fark her in a week.
 
2013-11-05 08:30:31 PM  
Former Spice Girl Geri Halliwell's comeback single sold just 393 copies in its first week of release.
'Half Of Me' was released in Australia, where Halliwell is currently appearing as a judge on the Australia's Got Talent television show. Despite her exposure in the country, the song only got to Number 281 on the ARIA chart, reports Digital Spy.


Good to know that I could record a song, sell 400 copies, and actually have it chart.
 
2013-11-05 08:53:50 PM  
Link to video for the lazy.

I was expecting bland, overproduced pop that was somewhat listenable- but this is pretty bad.

/left after a minute or so.
 
2013-11-05 09:02:40 PM  

Mugato: But does she still have a nice rack?


www.blastr.com
Wait, what Jerry are we talking about?
 
2013-11-05 09:04:28 PM  
And they all got the "family and friends" discount, too
 
2013-11-05 09:09:48 PM  
static.nme.com

She's kinda got a Cheryl Tiegs thing going there.

I'd still spice her girl,  if you know what I mean.
And I think you do.
 
2013-11-05 09:15:43 PM  
Halliwell is currently appearing as a judge on the Australia's Got Talent television show

She's on TV and still can't sell the single. That's takes a rare talent.
 
2013-11-05 09:20:53 PM  

jamspoon: Halliwell is currently appearing as a judge on the Australia's Got Talent television show

She's on TV and still can't sell the single. That's takes a rare talent.


Or lack of
 
2013-11-05 09:46:23 PM  
She would've sold millions of copies of that song if she had twerked and stuck her tongue out in the video.
 
2013-11-05 10:28:10 PM  

elvisaintdead: She's kinda got a Cheryl Tiegs thing going there.

I'd still spice her girl,  if you know what I mean.
And I think you do.


I miss pizzajedi.
 
2013-11-05 10:30:16 PM  
That's an insane amount of autotune-distortion on her voice. Theoretically she could come within a mile of the correct pitch when she was with the Spice Girls (Autotune wasn't in use at the time, right?), what happened?
 
2013-11-05 10:33:22 PM  
I don't know, as far as pop goes, it's catchy.  I wouldn't BUY it, but it's not the worst song I've ever heard!
I like that she uses the word bullshiat in it.
 
2013-11-05 10:38:56 PM  
She looks like an aged soccer mom in the video, and the song is very obviously highly manufactured.

As for the sales figures... a LOT of pop stars are seeing the same thing, believe it or not. The labels are learning painfully that you can no longer sell garbage.
 
2013-11-05 10:46:38 PM  
i1.ytimg.com
 
2013-11-05 10:53:08 PM  

Suckmaster Burstingfoam: She looks like an aged soccer mom in the video...


If you don't mind me asking, where do your kids play soccer? And would anyone notice if a guy with no kids started hanging out with the moms there?
 
2013-11-05 10:57:52 PM  
Twenty seconds.
(I was replacing the mouse batteries.)
 
2013-11-05 11:01:41 PM  

Mugato: But does she still have a nice rack?


www.newsgab.com
It would appear so.
 
2013-11-05 11:09:00 PM  

dugitman: Link to video for the lazy.

I was expecting bland, overproduced pop that was somewhat listenable- but this is pretty bad.

/left after a minute or so.


19 seconds. The French horns nearly did me in, then she started singing.
 
2013-11-05 11:12:26 PM  

69gnarkill69: Mugato: But does she still have a nice rack?

[www.newsgab.com image 850x1242]
It would appear so.


O_o

One of those is not like the other.
 
2013-11-05 11:13:33 PM  

psychosis_inducing: That's an insane amount of autotune-distortion on her voice. Theoretically she could come within a mile of the correct pitch when she was with the Spice Girls (Autotune wasn't in use at the time, right?), what happened?


She's the Spice Girl I always forget about. I guess the lack of charisma has a lot to do with it. She's... bland. The song is bland and so is she. This is actually... Jeez, this is actually pretty sad.

Mel C is still the best of them. Vocally and otherwise. She always was. I mean, her voice is the sort that you either love or hate, but it's powerful, and it really tied the rest of the group together.

/Spice Girls nostalgia
 
2013-11-05 11:14:00 PM  
I hated the Spice Girls when they were around but they are downright quaint when you compare them to the singing labias on tits that are being foisted on us now.
 
2013-11-05 11:26:57 PM  
393 more than I've ever sold.
 
2013-11-05 11:29:20 PM  
Eh, I'd still hit it. Oh, who am I kidding... I'd still fap to it
 
2013-11-05 11:32:10 PM  

Canton: Mel C is still the best of them. Vocally and otherwise.


*Dana Carvey McLaughlin Group voice*

WRONG!

Baby Spice is best spice.
 
2013-11-05 11:49:04 PM  

fusillade762: Canton: Mel C is still the best of them. Vocally and otherwise.

*Dana Carvey McLaughlin Group voice*

WRONG!

Baby Spice is best spice.


Heh. Yeah, she's good, too.

Sporty's still the best. And "Scary." Honestly, though, Victoria Beckham should have been "Scary," and Mel B should have been "Posh." They really screwed that up royally.

Yes, I'm overthinking this. Manufactured tween pop was just better in the '90s, and I wasn't even that into it...

/What is it like when Victoria smiles?
 
2013-11-05 11:56:55 PM  

Canton: Baby Spice is best spice.

Heh. Yeah, she's good, too.


I'm partial to this song.

Free Me
 
2013-11-06 12:03:01 AM  

69gnarkill69: Mugato: But does she still have a nice rack?

[www.newsgab.com image 850x1242]
It would appear so.


she looks like she's not into too much botox
 
2013-11-06 12:06:12 AM  
I associate the spice girls with memories of me staying all night with my friends and listening to them. So good job?
 
2013-11-06 12:14:42 AM  
www.groceryshopforfree.com
 
2013-11-06 12:20:53 AM  

fusillade762: Canton: Baby Spice is best spice.

Heh. Yeah, she's good, too.

I'm partial to this song.

Free Me


Carolyna is quite good, too.

We all have our favorites. Just, you know, not Geri.

/Sorry Geri
 
2013-11-06 12:34:02 AM  
Uhm... 4 chord song/Pachalbel's Canon.
 
2013-11-06 12:34:33 AM  
Emma/Baby found her niche, working the cute angle on British soul tracks. I love "All I Need To Know" in particular (great remixes from Bimbo Jones, too). Mel C still gets club play on her remixes in the USA - I was a little shocked to hear a visiting Mexican DJ drop a remix of "Think About It" into his set, considering the song is now a couple of years old. But it worked on the floor, so there ya go.

I don't get Mel B, but I understand her popularity as a reality television star is pretty strong outside the USA. Geri has always struck me as the type who tries hard to be hip and trendy, but comes off like your aunt who wears inappropriate revealing clothes to the family picnic. I give Posh credit for realizing a solo singing career was never in her future.
 
2013-11-06 12:36:36 AM  

Earguy: Former Spice Girl Geri Halliwell's comeback single sold just 393 copies in its first week of release.
'Half Of Me' was released in Australia, where Halliwell is currently appearing as a judge on the Australia's Got Talent television show. Despite her exposure in the country, the song only got to Number 281 on the ARIA chart, reports Digital Spy.

Good to know that I could record a song, sell 400 copies, and actually have it chart.


The charts are really worthless when it comes to determining the popularity of a song. They tend to reflect how heavily promoted a song by the label, which is why boring worthless trash charts all of the time.
 
2013-11-06 12:52:43 AM  

buntz: I don't know, as far as pop goes, it's catchy.  I wouldn't BUY it, but it's not the worst song I've ever heard!
I like that she uses the word bulls hit in it.


It's not going to help her promote it on the radio.

Quite frankly, the song was a hot mess, but the video to promote it was even worse.
 
2013-11-06 12:53:56 AM  

ElLoco: 69gnarkill69: Mugato: But does she still have a nice rack?

[www.newsgab.com image 850x1242]
It would appear so.

O_o

One of those is not like the other.


Now I don't profess to know for sure whether there has been some artificial inflation so to speak, but that dress has no chance to contain those cannons in an equal proportion.
 
2013-11-06 12:55:01 AM  
393 too many.
 
2013-11-06 01:10:40 AM  
When Spice World first came out on video, they had a giant display of it in Sam's club. Some prankster had put the "10% off" stickers over the "e" in "spice", resulting in a giant display of the movie "Spic World".

/end csb
 
2013-11-06 04:53:46 AM  
Total Milf poprock. Geri is a Milf now, but trying to sing to a younger audience. She's cursing in the song, alienating half of her soccer mom audience. Take out the bad words Geri and you can push this to maybe 2000 copies. Worldwide.
 
2013-11-06 04:56:34 AM  
Who is this soccer mom?
 
2013-11-06 04:56:56 AM  
I'd come on her back 393 times if you know what I mean...

/although past the third or fourth it would be more of a dry cough than an ejaculation
 
2013-11-06 04:57:01 AM  

fusillade762: Canton: Mel C is still the best of them. Vocally and otherwise.

*Dana Carvey McLaughlin Group voice*

WRONG!

Baby Spice is best spice.


I agree!
In order of penising.
1. Baby*
2. Ginger*
3. Scary*
4. Posh*
5. Sporty**

*going by their heyday.
** can't see past Sporty's snaggletooth even though I can see past Jewel's. Must be bewbs.
 
2013-11-06 05:12:04 AM  
im going to go buy it.  393 times.  Maybe she will notice.
 
2013-11-06 06:44:58 AM  
I actually hard this as part of a sountrack on an american show... can't remember which one.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=I2xoW1_GMM8
 
2013-11-06 07:56:22 AM  
i171.photobucket.com

Melvin C, Emma, Melvin B, Victoria, Gary...

You have been found guilty of releasing a single that is by no means as kicking as your previous records, nor does it have such a wicked, dirty, phat bass line.  You are sentenced to having your next record enter the charts at number 179 before dropping straight out the following week.  Furthermore, you are sentenced to 20 years of having to appear on cheesy chat shows in Taiwan taking about how you used to be famous.  And may God have mercy on your lip gloss.

/call Howtie and the Blowfish
 
2013-11-06 08:01:57 AM  
That is genuinely appalling....

and i don't mind the synth french horns, because the PSB used them to great effect for Go West.
 
2013-11-06 08:27:35 AM  

fruitloop: [i171.photobucket.com image 528x356]

Melvin C, Emma, Melvin B, Victoria, Gary...

You have been found guilty of releasing a single that is by no means as kicking as your previous records, nor does it have such a wicked, dirty, phat bass line.  You are sentenced to having your next record enter the charts at number 179 before dropping straight out the following week.  Furthermore, you are sentenced to 20 years of having to appear on cheesy chat shows in Taiwan taking about how you used to be famous.  And may God have mercy on your lip gloss.

/call Howtie and the Blowfish



When the rabbit of chaos is pursued by the ferret of disorder through the fields of anarchy, it is time to hang your pants on the hook of darkness. Whether they're clean or not.
 
2013-11-06 08:47:29 AM  
Bring Ginger and Sporty to me...
Nice way to use BS in the lyrics in Half of Me. She still looks great. Song is meh.

/sold about as many copies with my CD.
 
2013-11-06 09:05:51 AM  

69gnarkill69: It would appear so.


I would disappoint the hell out of her.

/7 years younger than me, so she still looks damn good
 
2013-11-06 09:17:35 AM  

PC LOAD LETTER: That's how many times I would fark her in a week.


Through in two.
 
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