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(Gawker)   Ring -ring -ring -ring -ring -ring -Bana-AHHH SPIDERS GET 'EM OFF ME   (gawker.com) divider line 91
    More: Scary, venomous spiders, Taylor's  
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9818 clicks; posted to Main » on 04 Nov 2013 at 6:49 PM (44 weeks ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



91 Comments   (+0 »)
   
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2013-11-04 05:04:50 PM
They make great pets.
i1068.photobucket.com

Come Mr. silly man turn over banana
 
2013-11-04 05:09:53 PM
There's two reasons they're called "banana spiders"

One is they like to hang out in conditions found in banana packs facilities and often get shipped out all over the world like this.

The other? Well look up what happens when they bite a man.
 
2013-11-04 05:16:54 PM
d2tq98mqfjyz2l.cloudfront.net
 
2013-11-04 05:17:02 PM
"An urban legend joined forces with a recurring nightmare and the worst case scenario to permanently traumatize a young mother who found dozens of the world's most venomous spiders crawling all over the banana she was preparing to consume."

Perfect.
 
2013-11-04 05:18:30 PM

doglover: The other? Well look up what happens when they bite a man.


Daylight come and he wan' go home?
 
2013-11-04 05:19:29 PM
A month or two ago, I was in the grocery store and decided to buy some snack mix. They have it in these tubes and you pull a lever and dispense it into a little ziplock bag yourself, etc.

They didn't have the kind I normally get, so I got the "fiesta" mix. A day or two later, I ate some. It was okay.

A few days after that I decided to have some more. I got a bowl, got the bag out of the pantry and then got distracted for a minute.

When I came back, there were 7-8 weird beige flies fluttering around the sealed bag.

"NOPE," I said, and tossed the bag into the trash.
 
2013-11-04 05:28:51 PM

exick: doglover: The other? Well look up what happens when they bite a man.

Daylight come and he wan' go home?


You could call them Viagra spiders.
 
2013-11-04 05:32:40 PM

Shostie: A month or two ago, I was in the grocery store and decided to buy some snack mix. They have it in these tubes and you pull a lever and dispense it into a little ziplock bag yourself, etc.

They didn't have the kind I normally get, so I got the "fiesta" mix. A day or two later, I ate some. It was okay.

A few days after that I decided to have some more. I got a bowl, got the bag out of the pantry and then got distracted for a minute.

When I came back, there were 7-8 weird beige flies fluttering around the sealed bag.

"NOPE," I said, and tossed the bag into the trash.



So ... I guess fly larvae are tasteless, then?
 
2013-11-04 06:05:41 PM

Shostie: When I came back, there were 7-8 weird beige flies fluttering around the sealed bag.


Obviously you need more spiders in your foodstuffs in order to eat the flies.
 
2013-11-04 06:18:41 PM
That Tracy Morgan GIF in one of the Weenerss is farking hilarious.
 
2013-11-04 06:27:05 PM
Dammit.
 
2013-11-04 06:50:22 PM
I'm not afraid of regular spiders. I live in an older home, and they came with the place. But these? Loose in my house?

Yeah, I'd be burning the place to the ground.

It's the only way to be sure, really.
 
2013-11-04 06:51:48 PM
She was initially offered £10 ($16) for her trouble, but after sending a photo of the spider to a pest control specialist, Taylor, her husband Richard, and their two small children were ordered to get the hell out of the house and never look back.

NOPE.

images2.wikia.nocookie.net
 
2013-11-04 06:53:15 PM
I found a nondescript spider in the bananas in the local Meijer store the other week.  Wanted to take it home but the idiot guy who was stocking the produce stand killed it.  Asshole.
 
2013-11-04 06:53:18 PM

namegoeshere: I'm not afraid of regular spiders. I live in an older home, and they came with the place. But these? Loose in my house?

Yeah, I'd be burning the place to the ground.

It's the only way to be sure, really.


Request tactical nuclear strike on our position.
 
2013-11-04 06:56:14 PM
Come, Mister tally man, tally me banana.
Spiders come and me wan' go home.
 
2013-11-04 06:56:38 PM

fusillade762: She was initially offered £10 ($16) for her trouble, but after sending a photo of the spider to a pest control specialist, Taylor, her husband Richard, and their two small children were ordered to get the hell out of the house and never look back.

NOPE.

[images2.wikia.nocookie.net image 605x489]


i.imgur.com
 
2013-11-04 06:57:17 PM

doglover: exick: doglover: The other? Well look up what happens when they bite a man.

Daylight come and he wan' go home?

You could call them Viagra spiders.


If they can turn botulism into a billion dollar industry, we can make this work.
 
2013-11-04 06:57:18 PM
upload.wikimedia.org
The supermarket chain insisted it has "rigorous controls on imported products at all stages" which significantly reduce the instances of killer spiders bursting from bananas and attacking patrons.
 
2013-11-04 06:57:50 PM

doglover: exick: doglover: The other? Well look up what happens when they bite a man.

Daylight come and he wan' go home?

You could call them Viagra spiders.


If there's one thing I've learned from years of Farking, it's to never look up an image someone dares me to look up.
 
2013-11-04 06:59:55 PM

oldwolf49: I found a nondescript spider in the bananas in the local Meijer store the other week.  Wanted to take it home but the idiot guy who was stocking the produce stand killed it.  Asshole.


Sounds like the guy at Meijer's is smarter than you.

/not taking any chances.
 
2013-11-04 07:02:06 PM
It's the most nutritious infestation ever.
 
2013-11-04 07:03:02 PM

born_yesterday: doglover: exick: doglover: The other? Well look up what happens when they bite a man.

Daylight come and he wan' go home?

You could call them Viagra spiders.

If they can turn botulism into a billion dollar industry, we can make this work.


Well they are working on a way to use the toxin as a viagra type med. Also they are working on a way to make a very effective chemo drug out of copperhead and cottonmouth venom.
 
2013-11-04 07:03:27 PM
25.media.tumblr.com

Spider thread! Spider thread!
Freaky Monday full steam ahead!
If your stuff emits squeaks,
It might be:

d2oz5j6ef5tbf6.cloudfront.net


Hey there......Here comes the spider thrrrrrrread!
 
2013-11-04 07:03:36 PM
www.usaap.com
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAaaaaaaaaaaaaaaggggggggghhhhhhh!

/hot
 
2013-11-04 07:05:37 PM
What's the big deal? Spiders are a girl's best friend

4.bp.blogspot.com
 
2013-11-04 07:06:00 PM
My BIL is a picker at a Whole Foods distribution center and they find creatures weekly, if not daily. Far more often than is reported in the news.
 
2013-11-04 07:06:28 PM
ALL OF MY  NOPE!

2.bp.blogspot.com

www.darkgovernment.com

picdit.files.wordpress.com
 
2013-11-04 07:06:36 PM

ciberido: Come, Mister tally man, tally me banana.
Spiders come and me wan' go home.


Tally me banana, eh?

Usually, you have to pay extra for that...
 
2013-11-04 07:07:21 PM
i40.tinypic.com

Steve, send the phone spiders!
 
2013-11-04 07:10:39 PM

born_yesterday: doglover: exick: doglover: The other? Well look up what happens when they bite a man.

Daylight come and he wan' go home?

You could call them Viagra spiders.

If they can turn botulism into a billion dollar industry, we can make this work.


Per the Brazilian wandering spider wikipedia article, a viagra substitute is actually being developed from the venom.
 
2013-11-04 07:10:52 PM
Don't all spiders wander?
 
2013-11-04 07:14:08 PM
i.imgur.com
 
2013-11-04 07:14:59 PM

Kalashinator: born_yesterday: doglover: exick: doglover: The other? Well look up what happens when they bite a man.

Daylight come and he wan' go home?

You could call them Viagra spiders.

If they can turn botulism into a billion dollar industry, we can make this work.

Per the Brazilian wandering spider wikipedia article, a viagra substitute is actually being developed from the venom.


But if it causes paralysis, wouldn't it make you go all whiskey dick?
 
2013-11-04 07:17:42 PM

God Is My Co-Pirate: [i40.tinypic.com image 480x360]

Steve, send the phone spiders!


I guess we're NOT interested!
 
2013-11-04 07:19:23 PM
www.myblackhistory.net

"I tried to warn you all, but did you listen? Noooooo......"
 
2013-11-04 07:19:24 PM
Just to be sure we get them all.

img28.imageshack.us
 
2013-11-04 07:25:30 PM
Who buys bananas in bags?
 
2013-11-04 07:26:24 PM

Stahi: God Is My Co-Pirate: [i40.tinypic.com image 480x360]

Steve, send the phone spiders!

I guess we're NOT interested!


I swear to god, I had two telemarketers call my cell at 6:00 am.  If Dr. Weird ever patented that sucker, I'd be ordering "Spiders-R-Us" in bulk.
 
2013-11-04 07:26:29 PM
Awesome headline is
 
2013-11-04 07:28:40 PM

i36.photobucket.com

 
IP
2013-11-04 07:29:33 PM

Apos: [25.media.tumblr.com image 500x360]

Spider thread! Spider thread!
Freaky Monday full steam ahead!
If your stuff emits squeaks,
It might be:

[d2oz5j6ef5tbf6.cloudfront.net image 150x227]


Hey there......Here comes the spider thrrrrrrread!


Relevant.
 
2013-11-04 07:33:39 PM

uncleacid: Don't all spiders wander?


The ones with a mortgage don't.
 
2013-11-04 07:38:42 PM
 
2013-11-04 07:38:57 PM
i.chzbgr.com
 
2013-11-04 07:42:42 PM

ciberido: Come, Mister tally man, tally me banana.
Spiders come and me wan' go home.


A beautiful bunch, a ripe banana
(Daylight come and me wan' go home)
Hide the deadly, black tarantula
(Daylight come and me wan' go home)
 
2013-11-04 07:42:52 PM

Cagey B: Shostie: When I came back, there were 7-8 weird beige flies fluttering around the sealed bag.

Obviously you need more spiders in your foodstuffs in order to eat the flies.


Now that is funny!!

You're a glass-half-full kinda guy aren't you?
 
2013-11-04 07:44:31 PM

lordargent: Who buys bananas in bags?


Came here to say this.

Seems like a good way to get rotten bananas...with spiders on them.
 
2013-11-04 07:47:03 PM
i.imgur.com


i.imgur.com
 
2013-11-04 07:52:02 PM
'Sup?
www.forafewmoviesmore.com
 
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