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(Deadspin)   Why most of your paycheck disappears when you head to a bar   (deadspin.com) divider line 65
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11048 clicks; posted to Main » on 01 Nov 2013 at 4:58 PM (37 weeks ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2013-11-01 04:57:50 PM
It's easier and cheaper to keep the bar at home.  Man...I can get a 1.75 of Smirnoff for $21 (get the plastic...you can squeeze it and the liquor comes out faster).
 
2013-11-01 05:02:56 PM

Why most of your paycheck disappears when you head to a bar


Because booze.

This is a mystery now?
 
2013-11-01 05:02:58 PM
It's almost as if the bar is trying to make money off you.
 
2013-11-01 05:03:31 PM
The worst deal for the consumer is bottom-shelf liquor. The bar can get a liter of generic vodka for $7; now they're down to 31 cents worth of booze per drink as opposed to the $1.22 they shell out for Stoli. Throw in the 13 cents worth of soda and nonsense and it's 44 cents for a drink they sell for $5.75.

This guy's bar sucks.  I can get 3 well drinks for $5 at my local shiathole dive.
 
2013-11-01 05:03:49 PM
Because I keep thinking there will be sex in the champagne room.
 
2013-11-01 05:04:37 PM
If you've seen the atmosphere and the wonderful service at my local bourbon bar, you'd get it.  I don't go a lot, so a visit once in a while to try some new labels and get a smile from Katherine is worth $50 for a couple of hours.
 
2013-11-01 05:06:08 PM
Are you seriously trying to tell me that it's cheaper to drink at home than it is at a bar???
 
2013-11-01 05:06:15 PM

tricycleracer: The worst deal for the consumer is bottom-shelf liquor. The bar can get a liter of generic vodka for $7; now they're down to 31 cents worth of booze per drink as opposed to the $1.22 they shell out for Stoli. Throw in the 13 cents worth of soda and nonsense and it's 44 cents for a drink they sell for $5.75.

This guy's bar sucks.  I can get 3 well drinks for $5 at my local shiathole dive.


I can't find a decent shiathole dive in Austin anymore. There's exactly one bar in my neighborhood, and it was made clear to me that I was not welcome there (there was a language barrier, but not enough of one for me to not get the hint...). Every other dive bar that I used to visit is now taken over by hipsters swilling Lone Star and PBR for five dollars a can. It makes me sad.
 
2013-11-01 05:07:22 PM
It's because I as always get the good prostitute, isn't it? I KNEW I should have gotten meth Mary...
 
2013-11-01 05:07:42 PM

UberDave: It's easier and cheaper to keep the bar at home.  Man...I can get a 1.75 of Smirnoff for $21 (get the plastic...you can squeeze it and the liquor comes out faster).


If your drink comes out of a plastic bottle, you've got a problem.
 
2013-11-01 05:08:16 PM
Here's what I want to know.  Why is booze so cheap in Europe?  I was just in Spain and a decent glass of wine everywhere you go - even the tourist places - is about $2.66  (I'm converting).  Wine and beer is equal  in price or cheaper than a bottle of water.   In a supermarket, a cheap bottle of wine is $2 and decent drinking wine will set you back $3.50 tops.  I was picking up the 3 Euro bottles all day.  In the US that quality would have cost me $12.

What the hell is it with the US?  Taxes?
 
2013-11-01 05:10:23 PM
There are cheap places to drink in almost all cities, find one.

My local Texas Road House has $2.50 22oz Ziegenbocks all the time. It's not a bad beer for a budweiser product and does what it is supposed to do.
 
2013-11-01 05:11:00 PM

UberDave: It's easier and cheaper to keep the bar at home.  Man...I can get a 1.75 of Smirnoff for $21 (get the plastic...you can squeeze it and the liquor comes out faster).


It's under a dollar for the plastic in WalMart for the same stuff!!

www.theofficedealer.com

/Seriously - that is exactly what is tastes like to me... LOL  Now, I can drink Popov and enjoy it and sense none of that rubbing alky taste
//have had a collector's "Nutcracker" Smirnoff bottle in with my bottles for a good 6-7 years.. only about 1/4th of it gone and wasn't by me!!!! (do like the bottle tho - only reason I bought it lol)
 
2013-11-01 05:11:50 PM

Rapmaster2000: Here's what I want to know.  Why is booze so cheap in Europe?  I was just in Spain and a decent glass of wine everywhere you go - even the tourist places - is about $2.66  (I'm converting).  Wine and beer is equal  in price or cheaper than a bottle of water.   In a supermarket, a cheap bottle of wine is $2 and decent drinking wine will set you back $3.50 tops.  I was picking up the 3 Euro bottles all day.  In the US that quality would have cost me $12.

What the hell is it with the US?  Taxes?


You can get 3 liters of 7.5% Frosty Jack cider in the UK for $4.76.  You can get black-out drunk for less than 5 bucks.  That's incredible.
 
2013-11-01 05:12:31 PM
I worked in a college bar that did penny beer night.  $3 to get in the door and a penny a beer all night.  The bar made bank on this night because:

1.  Keg prices for Busch or Bud Light (we would get whatever he was getting rid of) were about $30 (this was 1996).
2.  10 guys can drink a keg, but they're likely not going to.  It takes time to do that.
3.  The beers were in 8 ounce cups, so we keep the waste low.
4.  Everything else was full price.  Girls do not want to drink piss beer, so they'll pay the $3 and pay for other drinks.

They'd get over 1,000 people in the door on a Wednesday so it worked out pretty well.  Plus the pyscho owner made us get all the damn pennies up off the floor.   The sucky part was breaking up all the fights.
 
2013-11-01 05:13:33 PM

pedobearapproved: It's almost as if the bar is trying to make money off you.


This.

It's not the price of liquor.  It's (the price of liquor + rent + insurance + bartender) * (average number of drinks you buy in a night)/(number of people you can fit into the bar).

Or since the bartenders tend to be pretty busy late at night, (the price of liquor + rent + insurance + bartender) / (number of drinks that your bartenders can serve in 5 hours).

/Which is why we always start the night off at the $2.75/drink dive bar, and slowly graduate to the $7.00/drink bar across the street.
 
2013-11-01 05:14:54 PM
Sometimes I'm kind of glad that I'm enough of a lightweight to drink two beers (or even one), and be able to call it a night. It can be frustrating, however.
 
2013-11-01 05:15:25 PM

tricycleracer: Rapmaster2000: Here's what I want to know.  Why is booze so cheap in Europe?  I was just in Spain and a decent glass of wine everywhere you go - even the tourist places - is about $2.66  (I'm converting).  Wine and beer is equal  in price or cheaper than a bottle of water.   In a supermarket, a cheap bottle of wine is $2 and decent drinking wine will set you back $3.50 tops.  I was picking up the 3 Euro bottles all day.  In the US that quality would have cost me $12.

What the hell is it with the US?  Taxes?

You can get 3 liters of 7.5% Frosty Jack cider in the UK for $4.76.  You can get black-out drunk for less than 5 bucks.  That's incredible.


Maybe this explains why seemingly every British tourist in Europe is shiatfaced.
 
2013-11-01 05:15:53 PM

1000 Ways to Dye: UberDave: It's easier and cheaper to keep the bar at home.  Man...I can get a 1.75 of Smirnoff for $21 (get the plastic...you can squeeze it and the liquor comes out faster).

If your drink comes out of a plastic bottle, you've got a problem.


Probably 99, but broken glass ain't one.
 
2013-11-01 05:16:47 PM

Snarfangel: 1000 Ways to Dye: UberDave: It's easier and cheaper to keep the bar at home.  Man...I can get a 1.75 of Smirnoff for $21 (get the plastic...you can squeeze it and the liquor comes out faster).

If your drink comes out of a plastic bottle, you've got a problem.

Probably 99, but broken glass ain't one.


That's why I only drink can beers in the shower.  That was a bad night.
 
2013-11-01 05:16:54 PM
Dude needs a new bar.  My prefferred watering hole is $2.50 for a 16oz draught and $3.50 for a generous pour of Jim Beam.  $6.00 rounds, yes please.
 
2013-11-01 05:17:33 PM
Because I'm an alcoholic?
 
2013-11-01 05:18:08 PM
My aforementioned dive, The Flamingo Sports Lounge:

www.tampabay.com

This is where Jack had his last drink before dying of liver failure on the walk home.
 
2013-11-01 05:18:53 PM
Wished I paid taxes...............

/hahahaha, no I don't. Good luck and follow the Kitty Dukakis method of drinking.
 
2013-11-01 05:19:54 PM

Kygz: Dude needs a new bar.  My prefferred watering hole is $2.50 for a 16oz draught and $3.50 for a generous pour of Jim Beam.  $6.00 rounds, yes please.


Ugh.  I go out to enjoy myself.  If I was so desperate to save money that I'd drink something awful like Jim Beam, I'd either stay home or quit drinking.
 
2013-11-01 05:20:54 PM
Awesome! Now I'm waiting for Deadspin to show me why I shouldn't pay sticker price for that new car.
 
2013-11-01 05:21:50 PM

kwame: Kygz: Dude needs a new bar.  My prefferred watering hole is $2.50 for a 16oz draught and $3.50 for a generous pour of Jim Beam.  $6.00 rounds, yes please.

Ugh.  I go out to enjoy myself.  If I was so desperate to save money that I'd drink something awful like Jim Beam, I'd either stay home or quit drinking.


His draught of choice is probably Bud Miller or Coors, too.
 
2013-11-01 05:24:18 PM

UberDave: It's easier and cheaper to keep the bar at home.  Man...I can get a 1.75 of Smirnoff for $21 (get the plastic...you can squeeze it and the liquor comes out faster).


You.  I like you.
 
2013-11-01 05:24:27 PM
My favorite hole in the wall has $2 Boulevard Wheat drafts and bad karaoke. I love it.
 
2013-11-01 05:24:31 PM

1000 Ways to Dye: UberDave: It's easier and cheaper to keep the bar at home.  Man...I can get a 1.75 of Smirnoff for $21 (get the plastic...you can squeeze it and the liquor comes out faster).

If your drink comes out of a plastic bottle, you've got a problem.



No rug on my tile behind the bar?


/My GG, Absolute, obscure premium 5-distilled russian that I can't name, and 5-6 flavored are all in glass.
 
2013-11-01 05:27:32 PM
Damned child services always takin' ma kids away when I'm just trying to have a good time!
 
2013-11-01 05:30:13 PM

Rapmaster2000: I worked in a college bar that did penny beer night.  $3 to get in the door and a penny a beer all night.  The bar made bank on this night because:

1.  Keg prices for Busch or Bud Light (we would get whatever he was getting rid of) were about $30 (this was 1996).
2.  10 guys can drink a keg, but they're likely not going to.  It takes time to do that.
3.  The beers were in 8 ounce cups, so we keep the waste low.
4.  Everything else was full price.  Girls do not want to drink piss beer, so they'll their boyfriends, or the guys hitting on them, will pay the $3 and pay for other drinks.

They'd get over 1,000 people in the door on a Wednesday so it worked out pretty well.  Plus the pyscho owner made us get all the damn pennies up off the floor.   The sucky part was breaking up all the fights.


FTFY...
 
2013-11-01 05:35:00 PM
Two words;

Ladies Night!

Bow Chicka Bow Bow
 
2013-11-01 05:37:07 PM
That was very well written and funny. Thanks subs!
 
2013-11-01 05:48:29 PM

WinoRhino: kwame: Kygz: Dude needs a new bar.  My prefferred watering hole is $2.50 for a 16oz draught and $3.50 for a generous pour of Jim Beam.  $6.00 rounds, yes please.

Ugh.  I go out to enjoy myself.  If I was so desperate to save money that I'd drink something awful like Jim Beam, I'd either stay home or quit drinking.

His draught of choice is probably Bud Miller or Coors, too.


Bud Light, good call!  I'd drink some of the nicer bourbons but the price increases pretty quickly above the house level.  I go out to enjoy myself as well, but if i spent $50 bucks every time I wanted to do so, I'd be able to go out far less than I like to.
 
2013-11-01 05:50:06 PM

1000 Ways to Dye: If your drink comes out of a plastic bottle, you've got a problem.


I inherited my grandfather's collection of rotgut gin and vodka after he died.  The tax stamps on the plastic bottles showed that they were about 20 years old.  None of it tasted like the rubbing alcohol I was expecting.  So maybe rotgut is fine if you toss it into a dark hole for two decades.  Nice gift for your newborn when they reach the legal age.

OTOH, plastic breathes, so for all I know, a good chunk of the alcohol had evaporated.
 
2013-11-01 05:50:42 PM

UberDave: It's easier and cheaper to keep the bar at home.  Man...I can get a 1.75 of Smirnoff for $21 (get the plastic...you can squeeze it and the liquor comes out faster).


I  try drinking at home, but it's just not the same.   It's just  lacking something.   What exactly is it?   I dunno.  Hard to put my finger on it.  Oh yeah, I know.  Drunk sluts.
 
2013-11-01 05:57:30 PM

Heraclitus: Two words;

Ladies Night!

Bow Chicka Bow Bow


Three words:

Illegal in Illinois!

Wah wah wah wahhhhhhhh
 
2013-11-01 05:59:14 PM

InmanRoshi: I  try drinking at home, but it's just not the same.   It's just  lacking something.   What exactly is it?   I dunno.  Hard to put my finger on it.  Oh yeah, I know.  Drunk sluts.


So invite your mom over.

/can I get an [ohsnap.jpg]?
 
2013-11-01 06:00:38 PM
I go to bars to get tap beers, particularly tap beers of stuff that is a pain to find in the stores or costs a bunch in stores.  Beers that are 10+ bucks a bomber are often not much more expensive (and in some cases less expensive) than buying it at the store, and at least I know the keg of that double IPA is likely to be fresh (AHEM THREE FLOYDS AND YOUR REFUSAL TO BOTTLE DATE).
 
2013-11-01 06:01:25 PM
More proof to never bother with bottom shelf. Tastes like crap and is watered down. You get what you pay for.

Which reminds me, I need to get to the bar in 26 min.

See you there Farkers
 
2013-11-01 06:02:50 PM
All of this talk of bars on a Friday afternoon is making me want to abandon work!

Someone have a maker's & coke for me
 
2013-11-01 06:04:13 PM
When you go out to a bar you are not paying those high prices just to get drunk you are paying them for the night out of the house and the ambiance of the location. It is the same reason why a cheeseburger that probubaly costs $2 to make at home, would cost $10 at a restourant.
 
2013-11-01 06:05:08 PM

tricycleracer: You can get 3 liters of 7.5% Frosty Jack cider in the UK for $4.76.  You can get black-out drunk for less than 5 bucks.  That's incredible.


You can get black out drunk in the states for 5 bucks.  You're just not going to want to admit how you did it.
 
2013-11-01 06:11:12 PM

tricycleracer: The worst deal for the consumer is bottom-shelf liquor. The bar can get a liter of generic vodka for $7; now they're down to 31 cents worth of booze per drink as opposed to the $1.22 they shell out for Stoli. Throw in the 13 cents worth of soda and nonsense and it's 44 cents for a drink they sell for $5.75.

This guy's bar sucks.  I can get 3 well drinks for $5 at my local shiathole dive.


yeah, was going to say something along these lines... maybe not 3 for 5... because i tip people...

but, a local dive bar has 1.25 drinks 24 hours a day.  (used to be a $1, but they had to raise prices.  it actually caused quite an outrage).

but, I am accustomed to well stuff being from $2-5.  more than 5, and their well better be some premium stuff.

also, i can't remember the last cheap bar I went to that only gave me 1.5 ounces per drink.
 
2013-11-01 06:23:38 PM

AbuHashish: That was very well written and funny. Thanks subs!


this, times this much
 
2013-11-01 06:23:55 PM
i43.tinypic.com
 
2013-11-01 07:18:06 PM

tricycleracer: Rapmaster2000: Here's what I want to know.  Why is booze so cheap in Europe?  I was just in Spain and a decent glass of wine everywhere you go - even the tourist places - is about $2.66  (I'm converting).  Wine and beer is equal  in price or cheaper than a bottle of water.   In a supermarket, a cheap bottle of wine is $2 and decent drinking wine will set you back $3.50 tops.  I was picking up the 3 Euro bottles all day.  In the US that quality would have cost me $12.

What the hell is it with the US?  Taxes?

You can get 3 liters of 7.5% Frosty Jack cider in the UK for $4.76.  You can get black-out drunk for less than 5 bucks.  That's incredible.


Yeah, we don't really consider that a  positive over here...

/still better than White Lightning
//also known as "apple flavoured paint stripper"
 
2013-11-01 07:24:59 PM
Legal prostitution?
 
2013-11-01 07:40:58 PM
These guys have "16 oz pints" for sale on their blackboard.  They pour you 14oz of beer with a finger of head and a finger of air.  Measures out to 14oz.  This is at the on-site brew pub, where the fermentation tanks are literally an arms' length away from the bar.
 
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