Do you have adblock enabled?
If you can read this, either the style sheet didn't load or you have an older browser that doesn't support style sheets. Try clearing your browser cache and refreshing the page.

(NBC News)   Iraqi Prime Minister Nouri Al-Malaki in Washington DC today to beg the president and lawmakers to please send US troops to occupy his country again   (worldnews.nbcnews.com) divider line 96
    More: Ironic, Prime Minister of Iraq, Maliki, United States, White House, Washington DC, Iraq, Iraqi government, Sunnis  
•       •       •

5778 clicks; posted to Main » on 01 Nov 2013 at 1:41 PM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



96 Comments   (+0 »)
   
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest

First | « | 1 | 2 | » | Last | Show all
 
2013-11-01 01:44:36 PM  
Sounds like a winning plan, America al-Akbar.
 
2013-11-01 01:47:26 PM  
Yeaaaaa. I'm gonna have to go ahead and say no, umkay?

ts1.mm.bing.net
 
2013-11-01 01:47:28 PM  
I predict this will end well.
 
2013-11-01 01:51:08 PM  
You wanted us out and we are out. Fix it yourself Mr. Prime Minister.
 
2013-11-01 01:51:32 PM  
img.fark.net
 
2013-11-01 01:52:02 PM  
What's Switzerland doing lately?
 
2013-11-01 01:52:11 PM  
Shock and Awe have retired.
 
2013-11-01 01:53:00 PM  
How does a President convey "eat shiat and die?"
 
2013-11-01 01:53:49 PM  
Someone call Cheney and Rumsfeld and ask what to do.
 
2013-11-01 01:54:43 PM  

uncleacid: Shock and Awe have retired.


You mean forced out for not agreeing to order American civilians to be fired upon
 
2013-11-01 01:56:18 PM  
If you want troops for hire, Blackwater's still in business. They're called "Academi" now. Prepare to pony up.
 
2013-11-01 01:57:07 PM  
Well, who saw that coming, shia and sunni killing each other?
 
2013-11-01 01:58:25 PM  
"Imagine how Americans would react if you had a terrorist organization operating on your own soil that killed dozens and maimed hundreds every week,"

tribktla.files.wordpress.com
www.jillstein.org
cdn.theatlantic.com

Imagine.
 
2013-11-01 01:58:31 PM  
i2.kym-cdn.com
 
2013-11-01 01:59:29 PM  
Well your in luck, we just so happen to have a few drones in your area.
 
2013-11-01 01:59:50 PM  
Ahh.. Mercenaries in 1775,  Mercenaries in 2013.

The more things change, the more they stay the same
 
2013-11-01 02:01:36 PM  
It's obvious we need to invade Saudi Arabia and cut off Al Qaeda's finances.
 
2013-11-01 02:02:26 PM  

Nutsac_Jim: Ahh.. Mercenaries in 1775,  Mercenaries in 2013.

The more things change, the more they stay the same


Now there's an idea. What's Blackwater/Xe doing these days?
 
2013-11-01 02:03:40 PM  
TFA isn't clear on this, but in al-Maliki's actual op-ed in the Times (which the Times seems to have pulled from their own search engine, but I was able to find after a few Googling attempts), he's not asking for troops, just equipment:

It has been almost two years since American troops withdrew from Iraq. And despite the terrorist threats we face, we are not asking for American boots on the ground. Rather, we urgently want to equip our own forces with the weapons they need to fight terrorism, including helicopters and other military aircraft so that we can secure our borders and protect our people. Hard as it is to believe, Iraq doesn't have a single fighter jet to protect its airspace.
 
2013-11-01 02:04:34 PM  

JohnAnnArbor: What's Switzerland doing lately?


Arming all it's citizens, yet somehow not having monthly school shootings. Next.

84Charlie: You wanted us out and we are out. Fix it yourself Mr. Prime Minister.


So, they didn't want you/need you there in the first place, you cause mayhem until it stops suiting you to, leaving the country in a position that requires genuine help, and that's your response. Really?

American arrogance is a particular breed of arrogance that the rest of the world hates, and leads America into not being able to understand why it is hated by the rest of the world.

*pukes*
 
2013-11-01 02:05:24 PM  
Maybe they could stop acting like 14th century sand farmers and catch up with the rest of the planet.
 
2013-11-01 02:06:35 PM  
Won't get fooled again.

/probably
 
2013-11-01 02:07:31 PM  

Arkanaut: TFA isn't clear on this, but in al-Maliki's actual op-ed in the Times (which the Times seems to have pulled from their own search engine, but I was able to find after a few Googling attempts), he's not asking for troops, just equipment:


While ceding most of the oil contracts to Chinese state-owned-enterprises.  Go beg for some Chengdu J-10s already.
 
2013-11-01 02:09:10 PM  
Okay. Fine. If and only if you do exactly as we say, exactly when say it. 

1) Islamic law? Not anymore. Secular government with no preferential treatment of any religious (or irreligious) group.
2) No more armed divisions of political parties. As bad as the Republican and Democratic parties are in the US, neither would create a standing paramilitary division (no, the Tea Party or NRA doesn't count).
3) Take your Sunni-Shia divide and shove it up your ass.
4) We're going off of the buddy system, and Canada is now your buddy. If they do something, you do it. Why? BECAUSE THEY'RE THE MOST REASONABLE COUNTRY ON THE PLANET.
 
2013-11-01 02:13:05 PM  
The next time we go to war for oil, let's actually GET some oil.
 
2013-11-01 02:14:19 PM  
If only Iraq had a valuable commodity that it could pump from the ground to barter for help.....if only.
 
2013-11-01 02:14:47 PM  

Marine1: 4) We're going off of the buddy system, and Canada is now your buddy. If they do something, you do it. Why? BECAUSE THEY'RE THE MOST REASONABLE COUNTRY ON THE PLANET.


That would be the Netherlands. Just drop enough weed on the country and start a guns for munchies program.
 
2013-11-01 02:15:58 PM  
Just get your Dinar revalued and people will be richer and will want to kick out all the baddies causing trouble, instead of being somewhat complacent about it all.
 
2013-11-01 02:16:20 PM  

simplicimus: Marine1: 4) We're going off of the buddy system, and Canada is now your buddy. If they do something, you do it. Why? BECAUSE THEY'RE THE MOST REASONABLE COUNTRY ON THE PLANET.

That would be the Netherlands. Just drop enough weed on the country and start a guns for munchies program.


One step at a time, man.
 
2013-11-01 02:17:36 PM  

uttertosh: JohnAnnArbor: What's Switzerland doing lately?

Arming all it's citizens, yet somehow not having monthly school shootings. Next.

84Charlie: You wanted us out and we are out. Fix it yourself Mr. Prime Minister.

So, they didn't want you/need you there in the first place, you cause mayhem until it stops suiting you to, leaving the country in a position that requires genuine help, and that's your response. Really?

American arrogance is a particular breed of arrogance that the rest of the world hates, and leads America into not being able to understand why it is hated by the rest of the world.

*pukes*


Hmm. Why do they need fighter jets?
 
2013-11-01 02:20:44 PM  
I am shocked! Shocked I say!

I remember telling my friends that we (the US) apparently didn't understand the Middle East. My family had lived there for a number if years when I was younger so I felt I could do some Monday morning quarterbacking. As much as sadaam sucked, he kept the place somewhat in line. These are a people who are going to struggle governing themselves. Too many tribes and ethnic divisions who hate each other. They need a brutal dictator to keep everyone in line.
 
2013-11-01 02:21:37 PM  
step 1:build a wall around the country
step 2:give everyone a weapon
step 3:open fire
step 4:wait till someone says "i am the last one" and kill him.
step 5:turn out the lights and leave.
step 6:profit ?

/this works for many problems
 
2013-11-01 02:22:56 PM  

uttertosh: JohnAnnArbor: What's Switzerland doing lately?

Arming all it's citizens, yet somehow not having monthly school shootings. Next.

84Charlie: You wanted us out and we are out. Fix it yourself Mr. Prime Minister.

So, they didn't want you/need you there in the first place, you cause mayhem until it stops suiting you to, leaving the country in a position that requires genuine help, and that's your response. Really?

American arrogance is a particular breed of arrogance that the rest of the world hates, and leads America into not being able to understand why it is hated by the rest of the world.

*pukes*


Yes, the dictator who had his opponents' tongues cut out was just such a merry fellow, and we were so wrong to kick him out.

Does the US have some of that arrogance? Yeah. That being said, we're not the only ones with the ability to tell despots to knock it off. Maybe Europe with its grand, infinite wisdom in international affairs would like to step up to the plate for once... though it'd be nice if they didn't enslave all of the dark people and rape the continent for resources this time.
 
2013-11-01 02:23:42 PM  
Why should we waste money propping up an ally of Iran. Fark him. Let them pick up that bill.
 
2013-11-01 02:27:49 PM  

Big_Doofus: I am shocked! Shocked I say!

I remember telling my friends that we (the US) apparently didn't understand the Middle East. My family had lived there for a number if years when I was younger so I felt I could do some Monday morning quarterbacking. As much as sadaam sucked, he kept the place somewhat in line. These are a people who are going to struggle governing themselves. Too many tribes and ethnic divisions who hate each other. They need a brutal dictator to keep everyone in line.


Dictators tend to keep the populace in line. It's one of the things they do well.
 
2013-11-01 02:29:25 PM  
snarla.files.wordpress.com
 
2013-11-01 02:35:41 PM  

vudukungfu: Maybe they could stop acting like 14th century sand farmers and catch up with the rest of the planet.


You mean, like they had until you bombed them, and left them in a position to be terrorised by Al-Quaida. An organisation which has fark all to do with Iraq.

Why am I even replying to you...
 
2013-11-01 02:36:22 PM  

Marine1: Okay. Fine. If and only if you do exactly as we say, exactly when say it. 

1) Islamic law? Not anymore. Secular government with no preferential treatment of any religious (or irreligious) group.
2) No more armed divisions of political parties. As bad as the Republican and Democratic parties are in the US, neither would create a standing paramilitary division (no, the Tea Party or NRA doesn't count).
3) Take your Sunni-Shia divide and shove it up your ass.
4) We're going off of the buddy system, and Canada is now your buddy. If they do something, you do it. Why? BECAUSE THEY'RE THE MOST REASONABLE COUNTRY ON THE PLANET.


Almost like they had before Bush and Co. went and stuck their dicks in it.
 
2013-11-01 02:37:40 PM  
If you've read the novel 1632, you'd send United Mine Workers and cheerleaders.
 
2013-11-01 02:38:58 PM  
I say sure, fine, no problem. We'll just send in the Israelis! They would love some more beach front property!
 
2013-11-01 02:39:35 PM  
Abe Vigoda's Ghost: Imagine

It's not that easy. The Iraqis don't have an effective police force like the US.
 
2013-11-01 02:39:59 PM  

cameroncrazy1984: Nutsac_Jim: Ahh.. Mercenaries in 1775,  Mercenaries in 2013.

The more things change, the more they stay the same

Now there's an idea. What's Blackwater/Xe doing these days?


Preparing to rename itself yet again to the East Iraq Trading Company (or possibly Tamerlane Industries) after getting a few memorandums of understanding signed of on by the Iraqi "government" would be my guess
 
2013-11-01 02:41:33 PM  
I am shocked! Shocked I say!

That A poorly cobbled together country by the victors of a world war made up of 2 religious factions that have been killing each other since the very begining of their own religion , that  could only be held in check by a ruthless murderous psychopathic dictator, would have any civil trouble after being bombed back to the stoneage, at the enormous cost of lives and  ravaging of the  finanaces, and then left to fend for themselves..

would then fall into being A poorly cobled together country by the victors of a world war made up of 2 religious factions that have been killing each other since the very begining of their own religion , that could only be held in check by a ruthless murderous psychopathic dictator.
 
2013-11-01 02:41:36 PM  

Arkanaut: TFA isn't clear on this, but in al-Maliki's actual op-ed in the Times (which the Times seems to have pulled from their own search engine, but I was able to find after a few Googling attempts), he's not asking for troops, just equipment:

It has been almost two years since American troops withdrew from Iraq. And despite the terrorist threats we face, we are not asking for American boots on the ground. Rather, we urgently want to equip our own forces with the weapons they need to fight terrorism, including helicopters and other military aircraft so that we can secure our borders and protect our people. Hard as it is to believe, Iraq doesn't have a single fighter jet to protect its airspace.


To be fair, we did shoot down or bomb their air force into oblivion (assuming the pilots didn't fly to a neighboring nation and surrender).
 
2013-11-01 02:41:39 PM  

relaxitsjustme: Marine1: Okay. Fine. If and only if you do exactly as we say, exactly when say it. 

1) Islamic law? Not anymore. Secular government with no preferential treatment of any religious (or irreligious) group.
2) No more armed divisions of political parties. As bad as the Republican and Democratic parties are in the US, neither would create a standing paramilitary division (no, the Tea Party or NRA doesn't count).
3) Take your Sunni-Shia divide and shove it up your ass.
4) We're going off of the buddy system, and Canada is now your buddy. If they do something, you do it. Why? BECAUSE THEY'RE THE MOST REASONABLE COUNTRY ON THE PLANET.

Almost like they had before Bush and Co. went and stuck their dicks in it.


7/10. Almost got me to bite.
 
2013-11-01 02:42:42 PM  

Marine1: Take your Sunni-Shia divide and shove it up your ass.


i.imgur.com

Well if that doesn't work, I don't know what will!
 
2013-11-01 02:43:02 PM  
Can recommend a course of action....
img.rp.vhd.me
 
2013-11-01 02:44:07 PM  

Rent Party: How does a President convey "eat shiat and die?"


riehlworldview.com
 
2013-11-01 02:44:33 PM  

Rent Party: How does a President convey "eat shiat and die?"


he  went to his ranch to act like a cowboy and chopped firewood

\ looking at you regean and bush
 
2013-11-01 02:46:46 PM  
Sorry al-Malarkey, you said NO extensions:

 "The last American soldier will leave Iraq" as agreed, he said, speaking at his office in a leafy section of Baghdad's protected Green Zone. "This agreement is not subject to extension, not subject to alteration. It is sealed."

-Wall Street Journal, Dec 28, 2010 (won't let me link)
 
Displayed 50 of 96 comments

First | « | 1 | 2 | » | Last | Show all

View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest


This thread is closed to new comments.

Continue Farking
Submit a Link »
Advertisement
On Twitter





In Other Media


  1. Links are submitted by members of the Fark community.

  2. When community members submit a link, they also write a custom headline for the story.

  3. Other Farkers comment on the links. This is the number of comments. Click here to read them.

  4. Click here to submit a link.

Report