If you can read this, either the style sheet didn't load or you have an older browser that doesn't support style sheets. Try clearing your browser cache and refreshing the page.

(The Atlantic Wire)   Since 12 million Americans can't be wrong, here's a handy guide to spotting the Reptiloids who are secretly running our government   (theatlanticwire.com) divider line 196
    More: Amusing, Americans, U.S. government, reptiles  
•       •       •

13268 clicks; posted to Main » on 01 Nov 2013 at 3:01 PM (23 weeks ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



196 Comments   (+0 »)
   
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest

First | « | 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | » | Last | Show all
 
2013-11-01 12:18:54 PM
4% of Americans believe in lizard people. Just under 70% believe in angels. We need a poll to find out how many believe Angelic Lizard people are involved in the myth of human created global warming.
 
2013-11-01 12:36:05 PM

mediablitz: 4% of Americans believe in lizard people. Just under 70% believe in angels. We need a poll to find out how many believe Angelic Lizard people are involved in the myth of human created global warming.


Truly, you have a dizzying intellect.
 
2013-11-01 12:40:11 PM

Magorn: mediablitz: 4% of Americans believe in lizard people. Just under 70% believe in angels. We need a poll to find out how many believe Angelic Lizard people are involved in the myth of human created global warming.

Truly, you have a dizzying intellect.


Don't think we can't tell you're a shill for the lizard people.
 
2013-11-01 12:45:30 PM
FTFA: "deep compassion for fate of mankind"

Then it's safe to assume that there are few republican lizeroids, or whatever.
 
2013-11-01 01:07:05 PM
If you believe that there is a super powerful, secret conspiracy that is running the world, wouldn't the smart move be to join it, rather than try to fight it?
 
2013-11-01 01:43:50 PM

FloydA: If you believe that there is a super powerful, secret conspiracy that is running the world, wouldn't the smart move be to join it, rather than try to fight it?


i42.tinypic.com
 
2013-11-01 01:54:02 PM
Paging Obama's Reptiloid Master to thread 8000396 or pick up the nearest white courtesy phone...

Paging Obama's Reptiloid Master to thread 8000396 or pick up the nearest white courtesy phone
 
2013-11-01 02:07:59 PM

FloydA: If you believe that there is a super powerful, secret conspiracy that is running the world, wouldn't the smart move be to join it, rather than try to fight it?


You can't unless you're a reptilozoid... or have they gotten to you too? :O Yioyu are oen¬!!! Panic typing!!
 
2013-11-01 02:10:42 PM
"true red or reddish hair"

Confirming what I already suspected.
 
2013-11-01 02:13:12 PM

Slaxl: FloydA: If you believe that there is a super powerful, secret conspiracy that is running the world, wouldn't the smart move be to join it, rather than try to fight it?

You can't unless you're a reptilozoid... or have they gotten to you too? :O Yioyu are oen¬!!! Panic typing!!


i105.photobucket.com

(Granted, my ability to disrupt electrical appliances is mainly restricted to unplugging them, and I don't so much have a "sense of not belonging to the human race" as an occasional wish that I didn't.)
 
2013-11-01 02:17:46 PM
Hahaha, oh the things we humans will believe. Lizard people! As though beautifully ridged scales could ever compare to our oddly warm and squishy mammalian flesh that most certainly does not reek of prey-smell!
 
2013-11-01 02:20:09 PM
Well shiat, I have blue eyes, reddish blond hair, low blood pressure, have seen a ufo (still think it had property of us government stamped on it somewhere), love science, have great eyesight, (even for my age) and hearing,  have a couple of scars that I have no idea how I got, and I care about humanity and I go through watch batteries like crazy............I better not start getting a craving for insects dammit!
 
2013-11-01 02:22:35 PM

FloydA: Slaxl: FloydA: If you believe that there is a super powerful, secret conspiracy that is running the world, wouldn't the smart move be to join it, rather than try to fight it?

You can't unless you're a reptilozoid... or have they gotten to you too? :O Yioyu are oen¬!!! Panic typing!!

[i105.photobucket.com image 640x616]

(Granted, my ability to disrupt electrical appliances is mainly restricted to unplugging them, and I don't so much have a "sense of not belonging to the human race" as an occasional wish that I didn't.)


hmmm my wife is a red head whose eyes are a fairly reliable "mood-ring" as they go from Blue to grey to green depending on how she's feeling, and despite being a bit big has a blood pressure that draw admiring  approval from Dr.s she sees....so....oh...oh. crap...this would explain so much..
 
2013-11-01 02:32:44 PM

Magorn: FloydA: Slaxl: FloydA: If you believe that there is a super powerful, secret conspiracy that is running the world, wouldn't the smart move be to join it, rather than try to fight it?

You can't unless you're a reptilozoid... or have they gotten to you too? :O Yioyu are oen¬!!! Panic typing!!

[i105.photobucket.com image 640x616]

(Granted, my ability to disrupt electrical appliances is mainly restricted to unplugging them, and I don't so much have a "sense of not belonging to the human race" as an occasional wish that I didn't.)

hmmm my wife is a red head whose eyes are a fairly reliable "mood-ring" as they go from Blue to grey to green depending on how she's feeling, and despite being a bit big has a blood pressure that draw admiring  approval from Dr.s she sees....so....oh...oh. crap...this would explain so much..



Oh you lucky, lucky man.

i105.photobucket.com
 
2013-11-01 03:02:49 PM

Peter von Nostrand: Paging Obama's Reptiloid Master to thread 8000396 or pick up the nearest white courtesy phone...

Paging Obama's Reptiloid Master to thread 8000396 or pick up the nearest white courtesy phone


1.bp.blogspot.com
 
2013-11-01 03:02:58 PM
WTF is this shait?
 
2013-11-01 03:04:43 PM
Reptoloids have an R next to their name, duh.

The ones with the D's are Death Eaters from Harry Potter.
 
2013-11-01 03:04:54 PM

unyon: FTFA: "deep compassion for fate of mankind"

Then it's safe to assume that there are few republican lizeroids, or whatever.


No no. The reps work with the grays. They all have a fondness for anally probing young pages.
 
2013-11-01 03:05:12 PM
 What
 
2013-11-01 03:05:43 PM

Peter von Nostrand: Paging Obama's Reptiloid Master to thread 8000396 or pick up the nearest white courtesy phone...

Paging Obama's Reptiloid Master to thread 8000396 or pick up the nearest white courtesy phone


Damn, beaten to the punch.
 
2013-11-01 03:07:27 PM

A Dark Evil Omen: Peter von Nostrand: Paging Obama's Reptiloid Master to thread 8000396 or pick up the nearest white courtesy phone...

Paging Obama's Reptiloid Master to thread 8000396 or pick up the nearest white courtesy phone

Damn, beaten to the punch.


I had to wait like an hour to post a reply. Luckily Friday is casual basking in the sun day here at the Reptilorium, so I don't have much to do besides randomly activate the subcutaneous shock collar we put on Alex Jones.
 
Ant
2013-11-01 03:08:22 PM
OMG! My wife is an annunaki!
 
2013-11-01 03:08:44 PM

BMFPitt: Reptoloids have an R next to their name, duh.

The ones with the D's are Death Eaters from Harry Potter.


Death Panels --> Death Eaters.  We're through the looking glass, people!
 
2013-11-01 03:09:33 PM
They prefer to be called Leviathans.

i.imgur.com
 
2013-11-01 03:09:53 PM
we're gonna need more tinfoil
 
2013-11-01 03:10:45 PM

FloydA: Slaxl: FloydA: If you believe that there is a super powerful, secret conspiracy that is running the world, wouldn't the smart move be to join it, rather than try to fight it?

You can't unless you're a reptilozoid... or have they gotten to you too? :O Yioyu are oen¬!!! Panic typing!!

[i105.photobucket.com image 640x616]

(Granted, my ability to disrupt electrical appliances is mainly restricted to unplugging them, and I don't so much have a "sense of not belonging to the human race" as an occasional wish that I didn't.)


Hey, I have physic abilities! Maybe I'm secretly a lizard person too.  I should call my Mom tonight.
 
2013-11-01 03:11:37 PM
robot6.comicbookresources.com
 
2013-11-01 03:11:56 PM

mediablitz: Magorn: mediablitz: 4% of Americans believe in lizard people. Just under 70% believe in angels. We need a poll to find out how many believe Angelic Lizard people are involved in the myth of human created global warming.

Truly, you have a dizzying intellect.

Don't think we can't tell you're a shill for the lizard people.


Look like lizards, talk like people.
 
2013-11-01 03:12:36 PM

Sybarite: "true red or reddish hair"

Confirming what I already suspected.


Wait so I'm a lizard person? This explains so much.
 
2013-11-01 03:12:53 PM

Obama's Reptiloid Master: Peter von Nostrand: Paging Obama's Reptiloid Master to thread 8000396 or pick up the nearest white courtesy phone...

Paging Obama's Reptiloid Master to thread 8000396 or pick up the nearest white courtesy phone

[1.bp.blogspot.com image 194x194]


Sh*t just got real, didn't it?
 
2013-11-01 03:12:55 PM
Would humans change their physical attributes to infiltrate and take over cockroach society? Because that makes about as much since as Reptiloids..
 
2013-11-01 03:14:19 PM

mediablitz: 4% of Americans believe in lizard people. Just under 70% believe in angels. We need a poll to find out how many believe Angelic Lizard people are involved in the myth of human created global warming.


*Does GIS for Angelic Lizard People*

Meh, not great.  But I thought this was pretty good.

2.bp.blogspot.com
 
2013-11-01 03:15:04 PM

AgentPothead: Would humans change their physical attributes to infiltrate and take over cockroach society? Because that makes about as much since as Reptiloids..


You guys got some pretty sweet shiat, tbh.

We invented an interdimensional warp drive and artificial gravity, but not once did one of us come up with nachos.

Don't sell yourselves short.
 
2013-11-01 03:15:46 PM
Woah, turns out I am a Reptiloid (I don't have ESP but I have ESPN, close enough).

Where do I report to get my orders?
 
2013-11-01 03:15:54 PM

BMFPitt: Reptoloids have an R next to their name, duh.

The ones with the D's are Death Eaters from Harry Potter.


Actually, they swapped to be more secret.

mediablitz: Magorn: mediablitz: 4% of Americans believe in lizard people. Just under 70% believe in angels. We need a poll to find out how many believe Angelic Lizard people are involved in the myth of human created global warming.

Truly, you have a dizzying intellect.

Don't think we can't tell you're a shill for the lizard people.


Lizards don't have shells.  You're thinking of turtles.
 
2013-11-01 03:16:16 PM
Wait... having "deep compassion for the fate of mankind" marks you as inhuman?
 
2013-11-01 03:16:20 PM
theinfosphere.org
They also run the Catholic Church.
 
2013-11-01 03:16:40 PM
Poppycock. Only I know who the lizard people are, and I'm keeping the secret safe with me in the land of Lickety-Lickety Loo.
 
2013-11-01 03:17:01 PM
Well, that settles it.  We're all reptilian.
 
2013-11-01 03:17:10 PM
Dafuq did I just read?
 
2013-11-01 03:17:37 PM
I bet we get all hot and bothered about evil reptile overlords and it will turn out they're nothing more than grasping, sharp-dealing Investors.
 
2013-11-01 03:18:43 PM
Or shape-shifting Inhumu, who might be kinda annoying but are not really evil, per se.
 
2013-11-01 03:18:53 PM
the number of Americans that believe in lizard people
i.huffpost.com
is too damn high!
 
2013-11-01 03:20:20 PM

theorellior: Or shape-shifting Inhumu, who might be kinda annoying but are not really evil, per se.


Nice.
 
2013-11-01 03:21:13 PM
The whole alien thing is wrong, though. The Reptilians are actually from an alternate timeline where the K-T asteroid was on a slightly different trajectory and missed the Earth entirely. This allowed a sentient saurian species to evolve, which is millions of years ahead of us in technological development. They have developed the tech to sidestep into alternate timelines, and are quietly conquering other realities to give their population to grow.
 
2013-11-01 03:22:14 PM

jst3p: Woah, turns out I am a Reptiloid (I don't have ESP but I have ESPN, close enough).

Where do I report to get my orders?



You don't really have ESPN.  Meyers-Briggs is bullshiat.
 
2013-11-01 03:23:01 PM

mediablitz: 4% of Americans believe in lizard people. Just under 70% believe in angels. We need a poll to find out how many believe Angelic Lizard people are involved in the myth of human created global warming.


Ah but how many Angelic Lizard people can dance on the head of a pin?
 
2013-11-01 03:23:37 PM
Wow, this thread got awesome fast!
 
2013-11-01 03:24:39 PM

palelizard: BMFPitt: Reptoloids have an R next to their name, duh.

The ones with the D's are Death Eaters from Harry Potter.

Actually, they swapped to be more secret.

mediablitz: Magorn: mediablitz: 4% of Americans believe in lizard people. Just under 70% believe in angels. We need a poll to find out how many believe Angelic Lizard people are involved in the myth of human created global warming.

Truly, you have a dizzying intellect.

Don't think we can't tell you're a shill for the lizard people.

Lizards don't have shells.  You're thinking of turtles.


And I looked, and behold, a pale lizard! And its rider's name was Obama's Reptiloid Master, and Alex Jones followed him.
 
2013-11-01 03:24:41 PM

Mad_Radhu: The whole alien thing is wrong, though. The Reptilians are actually from an alternate timeline where the K-T asteroid was on a slightly different trajectory and missed the Earth entirely. This allowed a sentient saurian species to evolve, which is millions of years ahead of us in technological development. They have developed the tech to sidestep into alternate timelines, and are quietly conquering other realities to give their population to grow.


The Yilane frown on your shenanigans, ustuzou.
 
Displayed 50 of 196 comments

First | « | 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | » | Last | Show all

View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest


This thread is closed to new comments.

Continue Farking
Submit a Link »






Report