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(New York Daily News)   Eight students were hospitalized after which hazardous material was released in their school? A) benzene, B) carbon monoxide, or C) Axe body spray   (nydailynews.com) divider line 72
    More: Sick, Medgar Evers College Preparatory School, college preparatory school, Medgar Evers College  
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4874 clicks; posted to Main » on 31 Oct 2013 at 1:48 PM (45 weeks ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2013-10-31 02:28:18 PM

LarryDan43: sigdiamond2000: All you beta males laugh, but AXE has done more for children with their "Don't Be A Scrote, Broseph" campaign than any of your weak-ass topical junk sprays combined. They've even developed a new scent for b*tches that cuts down on cutter stank.

Seriously bro, at our house we've charted and tracked every axe product. We seperate them by success and disaster stories then we have a contest where a bros pick a spray and try to get laid. Depending on the scent you score higher or lower points. You score wearing the scent with the most disasters and you get the most points. Can't tell you the which scent is the best though so don't even ask.


So which one gets you the most Top Shelf?

/
 
2013-10-31 02:30:28 PM

ikanreed: No, but seriously, we're raising an entire generation to learn that deodorant makes you smell worse.  This will result in the offices of the future being populated with a combination of BO loaded assholes and axe wearing douchebags.


Are you suggesting Barack Obama is stinky?
 
2013-10-31 02:34:47 PM

oryx: Some college prep school. Somebody pulls a frat boy style prank and eight students run to the hospital all scared. They're not teaching the right things.


Calling bullshiat behavior "a prank" automatically gets you a pass and henceforth no one can criticize it.
 
2013-10-31 02:35:47 PM

sigdiamond2000: Thing about AXE is its like a gun. It needs to be treated with respect. My guess is someone without proper training tried to make it taintworthy by turning it 'zontal and spraying up. If you're gonna go gooch, you gotta at least lie on your back, and preferably employ stirrups. Great thing is while your down there you can totally blast your abs with some killer isos.


Are you up to 1000?  What about the gel mask?
 
2013-10-31 02:36:08 PM

ikanreed: No, but seriously, we're raising an entire generation to learn that deodorant makes you smell worse.  This will result in the offices of the future being populated with a combination of BO loaded assholes and axe wearing douchebags.

//ban axe before society falls apart.


Or both. BO smell and overabundance of Axe body spray (or cologne) are not mutually exclusive. In fact, it seems to be the regimen of choice for middle eastern men. I have a couple of guys in my freshman physics class that stink up the room so bad the class after us refuses to go in the classroom. It's not like I can tell my students not to wear the shiat either.
 
2013-10-31 02:38:33 PM

cynicalbastard: There used to be a doc where I worked that friggin' bathed in the stuff. While working in a "No-Scents" area. Got away with it because "fark u, I'm a doctor" apparently trumps all patient needs.


Was he one of those doctors with a thick axe-scent?
 
2013-10-31 02:42:10 PM

endmile: It's not like I can tell my students not to wear the shiat either.


Why not?
 
2013-10-31 02:55:06 PM
I would hate to see what happens if some kid lets of a really nasty smelling fart in class.  Hell, they probably would call in a hazmat team and wash the kid with a bunch of odor eaters.
 
2013-10-31 02:55:55 PM
Deadly mustard gas?

Gif too big...
 
2013-10-31 02:58:33 PM

DanZero: And the kids were all made equal

by benzene
AXE
and CO2


Very nicely done, excellent RUSH reference there.
 
2013-10-31 03:11:21 PM
All schools get to have one mysterious fumes day each year.  Clear the halls!
 
2013-10-31 03:19:55 PM

sigdiamond2000: All you beta males laugh, but AXE has done more for children with their "Don't Be A Scrote, Broseph" campaign than any of your weak-ass topical junk sprays combined. They've even developed a new scent for b*tches that cuts down on cutter stank.


I'm going to try to use cutter stank in a sentence this week.
 
2013-10-31 03:36:34 PM
Sounds like someone took our suggestion of how to get rid of the chemical weapons...
 
2013-10-31 03:48:10 PM
ACUTE EFFECTS
EYE CONTACT: May cause redness or irritation.
SKIN CONTACT: Overexposure may cause a skin reaction such as redness. Do not use on broken skin.
INGESTION: May cause nausea, vomiting and diarrhea.
RESPIRATORY: Intentional misuse by deliberately concentrating and inhaling the contents can be fatal or
harmful.

That's from Unilever.
 
2013-10-31 04:39:54 PM
Came for a reiteration of "the wave of Axe rolling in like a cloud of chlorine over the Somme..."

/ Leaving disappoint
// Can't remember which Farker wrote that originally
/ May have misremembered it
 
2013-10-31 08:16:50 PM

highendmighty: weapon13: FTA "There were no serious injuries"

No shiate! How the fark can you get serious injuries from spray?

On January 12, 2008 12 year old Daniel Hurley from Derbyshire, England died in a hospital five days after collapsing at his home. The medical coroner ruled that he had suffered from cardiac arrhythmia and died from heart failure as a result of spraying large amounts of Lynx in a confined space.


Or, as we say: Darwin.
 
2013-10-31 08:37:11 PM

Fano: Cutter is cockney rhyming slang for turd butter


Whatever that is. Cockney rhyming slang is utter shiate!
 
2013-10-31 08:56:58 PM
Only surprise is that it took this long.
 
2013-10-31 09:25:32 PM

Medic Zero: Fano: Cutter is cockney rhyming slang for turd butter

Whatever that is. Cockney rhyming slang is utter shiate!


You're right about that. I did assume that cutter meant "turd cutter" ie the ass or anus.

Are there any other languages that have an equivalent to cockney rhyming slang? It really is the stupidest form of communication. The only thing I can think of is the reggae song that has "knife and a fork, a bottle and a cork, that's the way we spell New York."
 
2013-10-31 10:42:56 PM

Fano: Medic Zero: Fano: Cutter is cockney rhyming slang for turd butter

Whatever that is. Cockney rhyming slang is utter shiate!

You're right about that. I did assume that cutter meant "turd cutter" ie the ass or anus.

Are there any other languages that have an equivalent to cockney rhyming slang? It really is the stupidest form of communication. The only thing I can think of is the reggae song that has "knife and a fork, a bottle and a cork, that's the way we spell New York."


I've often maintained that if the Cockneys had put the energy and ingenuity they used in the rhyming slang into self-improvement instead, they could have taken over the British Empire sometime around 1905.
 
2013-11-01 02:35:04 AM

thecpt: My dormmates would duck tape the button on an AXE can down and throw it in someone's room and hold the door closed.

So effective. So tragic.


When you have a compsci that hasn't showered in a week, sometimes dumping a full can of axe is an improvement.

We'd always stab the can to make sure *everything* came out and there was no chance to pull the tape.
 
2013-11-01 12:50:17 PM

highendmighty: weapon13: FTA "There were no serious injuries"

No shiate! How the fark can you get serious injuries from spray?

On January 12, 2008 12 year old Daniel Hurley from Derbyshire, England died in a hospital five days after collapsing at his home. The medical coroner ruled that he had suffered from cardiac arrhythmia and died from heart failure as a result of spraying large amounts of Lynx in a confined space.


That would be a death, not a serious injury. I was looking for examples of serious injuries from Axe spray.
 
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