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(MassLive)   There's "single man tries to cook" and then there's "fire department responds to single man's cooking for third time this year"   (masslive.com) divider line 26
    More: Dumbass, fire departments, retirement home, grease fire  
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2006 clicks; posted to Main » on 31 Oct 2013 at 12:25 PM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



26 Comments   (+0 »)
   
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2013-10-31 12:11:52 PM  
They said a grease fire on the stove was worsened when the occupant threw water on the burning grease.

mrwgifs.com
 
2013-10-31 12:24:19 PM  
I honestly want to know how fat this guy is.  He has to be fat.
 
2013-10-31 12:29:38 PM  
and they said that Taking Home Economics was a stupid idea way back in middle school.
 
2013-10-31 12:30:16 PM  
Old people shouldn't drive or have access to fire
 
2013-10-31 12:30:48 PM  
fta They said a grease fire on the stove was worsened when the occupant threw water on the burning grease.

Wings, dude! That's some aerial deep frying.
 
2013-10-31 12:30:53 PM  
Church Street School Senior Housing

Is that the name of where he lives or did this guy just put spaces for 5 nouns and mad lib it?
 
2013-10-31 12:43:03 PM  
Man, I know it doesn't indicate single in the article, but that's really offensive and incorrect, subby.  Anyone who was at some point single for an extended period of time knows that Ramen noodles are not flammable.  This actually indicates he's married and living with his wife in senior housing.  Because anyone who's been married for an extended period of time knows exactly what happened.  if she doesn't shut up, I'm burning the whole f*ing house down.
So lastly, as he's failed three times to carry out his uncontrollable anger on his wife and used a stove instead of a gun, we know he's just dumb.  And Italian.

/this happened in Ware?
 
2013-10-31 12:46:28 PM  
Do not use water on a grease fire people!  Use a wet towel or blanket, baking soda, or worst case fire extinguisher.  Jesus.
 
2013-10-31 12:48:10 PM  
images.wikia.com
 
2013-10-31 12:49:48 PM  

Endive Wombat: I honestly want to know how fat this guy is.  He has to be fat.


Not if he burns up all his food!
 
2013-10-31 12:52:17 PM  

Carn: Do not use water on a grease fire people!  Use a wet towel or blanket, baking soda, or worst case fire extinguisher.   Jesus.


Do not throw Jesus onto a fire.  He just bought a new robe.
 
2013-10-31 12:55:24 PM  
CSB:

One of my roommates after college came from an Ivy League school where they had full housekeeping and cooking done for them.

One Saturday morning, he decided to cook some eggs.  He knew that you were supposed to put something in the pan first, but he didn't know what.  So he just put some water in the pan, put it on the stove, cracked some eggs in, fired up the burner, and walked out.

Fifteen minutes later - smoke alarm and charred pan.  Love telling the story whenever possible, because - Water?  Really?
 
2013-10-31 01:01:12 PM  

Carn: grease fire people


Don't stop, believin', hold on to that feeeeeelin, grease fire people, aaaaaaaaahhhhhhh!!!!
 
2013-10-31 01:02:16 PM  

noitsnot: CSB:

One of my roommates after college came from an Ivy League school where they had full housekeeping and cooking done for them.

One Saturday morning, he decided to cook some eggs.  He knew that you were supposed to put something in the pan first, but he didn't know what.  So he just put some water in the pan, put it on the stove, cracked some eggs in, fired up the burner, and walked out.

Fifteen minutes later - smoke alarm and charred pan.  Love telling the story whenever possible, because - Water?  Really?


Not just men, either. Girl I dated used to make biscuits in the oven, but for some damn reason the bottom half would always stick. I watched her one day and she was greasing up the pans no problem. Then I noticed it. The oven is supposed to be preheated to like 400 degrees, then you put the biscuits in for 20 mins. She was putting the biscuits in the oven right when she turned it on to 400 degrees...

People do that with bbq all the time. You should start your bbq and let it heat up to the temperature you want to cook at before throwing your stuff on. Otherwise it'll likely stick to the grill and be charred while still not fully cooked in the center.
 
2013-10-31 01:12:52 PM  
25.media.tumblr.com

25.media.tumblr.com
 
2013-10-31 01:17:15 PM  
DUDE.

If you weren't able to cook in your younger years, NOW IS NOT THE TIME TO START.
 
2013-10-31 01:23:36 PM  

Genju: noitsnot: CSB:

One of my roommates after college came from an Ivy League school where they had full housekeeping and cooking done for them.

One Saturday morning, he decided to cook some eggs.  He knew that you were supposed to put something in the pan first, but he didn't know what.  So he just put some water in the pan, put it on the stove, cracked some eggs in, fired up the burner, and walked out.

Fifteen minutes later - smoke alarm and charred pan.  Love telling the story whenever possible, because - Water?  Really?

Not just men, either. Girl I dated used to make biscuits in the oven, but for some damn reason the bottom half would always stick. I watched her one day and she was greasing up the pans no problem. Then I noticed it. The oven is supposed to be preheated to like 400 degrees, then you put the biscuits in for 20 mins. She was putting the biscuits in the oven right when she turned it on to 400 degrees...

People do that with bbq all the time. You should start your bbq and let it heat up to the temperature you want to cook at before throwing your stuff on. Otherwise it'll likely stick to the grill and be charred while still not fully cooked in the center.


That's how I like my steak :)
 
2013-10-31 01:35:19 PM  

xanadian: Carn: grease fire people

Don't stop, believin', hold on to that feeeeeelin, grease fire people, aaaaaaaaahhhhhhh!!!!


ok I'm laughing but I did not need Journey stuck in my head today damn you.
 
2013-10-31 01:35:23 PM  

noitsnot: CSB:

One of my roommates after college came from an Ivy League school where they had full housekeeping and cooking done for them.

One Saturday morning, he decided to cook some eggs.  He knew that you were supposed to put something in the pan first, but he didn't know what.  So he just put some water in the pan, put it on the stove, cracked some eggs in, fired up the burner, and walked out.

Fifteen minutes later - smoke alarm and charred pan.  Love telling the story whenever possible, because - Water?  Really?


Marcy! You've made egg soup!
 
2013-10-31 02:11:30 PM  
friend of mine was trying to impress a new GF, he had a dinner party at his new apartment.  he was making a cajun catfish that he had learned how to make in a cooking class.   The cooking class had professional style vent hoods over the stoves.  His apparment had one of those stupid ones that just blows the air back into the kitchen.  Yes he made pepper spray smoke in his appartment.  All of the rest of the guests fled to the out of doors, while I crawled around the apartment and opened all of the windows and turned on fans.

very memerable dinner party indeed.
 
2013-10-31 02:44:20 PM  

noitsnot: CSB:

One of my roommates after college came from an Ivy League school where they had full housekeeping and cooking done for them.

One Saturday morning, he decided to cook some eggs.  He knew that you were supposed to put something in the pan first, but he didn't know what.  So he just put some water in the pan, put it on the stove, cracked some eggs in, fired up the burner, and walked out.

Fifteen minutes later - smoke alarm and charred pan.  Love telling the story whenever possible, because - Water?  Really?


Sounds like someones never poached an egg before.
 
2013-10-31 03:21:47 PM  

noitsnot: Genju: noitsnot: CSB:

One of my roommates after college came from an Ivy League school where they had full housekeeping and cooking done for them.

One Saturday morning, he decided to cook some eggs.  He knew that you were supposed to put something in the pan first, but he didn't know what.  So he just put some water in the pan, put it on the stove, cracked some eggs in, fired up the burner, and walked out.

Fifteen minutes later - smoke alarm and charred pan.  Love telling the story whenever possible, because - Water?  Really?

Not just men, either. Girl I dated used to make biscuits in the oven, but for some damn reason the bottom half would always stick. I watched her one day and she was greasing up the pans no problem. Then I noticed it. The oven is supposed to be preheated to like 400 degrees, then you put the biscuits in for 20 mins. She was putting the biscuits in the oven right when she turned it on to 400 degrees...

People do that with bbq all the time. You should start your bbq and let it heat up to the temperature you want to cook at before throwing your stuff on. Otherwise it'll likely stick to the grill and be charred while still not fully cooked in the center.

That's how I like my steak :)


Definitely for steak. But even then it's the wrong way to make it. You should heat the bbq up real high then just leave it about a minute on each side with the lid down. Or for seared tuna, you just press it on each side for like 30 seconds. But chicken.... ew.
 
2013-10-31 08:57:06 PM  

madgordy: friend of mine was trying to impress a new GF, he had a dinner party at his new apartment.  he was making a cajun catfish that he had learned how to make in a cooking class.   The cooking class had professional style vent hoods over the stoves.  His apparment had one of those stupid ones that just blows the air back into the kitchen.  Yes he made pepper spray smoke in his appartment.  All of the rest of the guests fled to the out of doors, while I crawled around the apartment and opened all of the windows and turned on fans.

very memerable dinner party indeed.


Wow.  Yeah, blackening has to be done with a real vent hood or outdoors.

/I use the same propane burner I use for boiling wort.  I want a real vent hood, but those things are expensive.
 
2013-10-31 08:58:15 PM  

farm machine: noitsnot: CSB:

One of my roommates after college came from an Ivy League school where they had full housekeeping and cooking done for them.

One Saturday morning, he decided to cook some eggs.  He knew that you were supposed to put something in the pan first, but he didn't know what.  So he just put some water in the pan, put it on the stove, cracked some eggs in, fired up the burner, and walked out.

Fifteen minutes later - smoke alarm and charred pan.  Love telling the story whenever possible, because - Water?  Really?

Sounds like someones never poached an egg before.


Yeah, that's what I was thinking.  Because yes, water, really.
 
2013-10-31 09:01:33 PM  

Nana's Vibrator: Carn: Do not use water on a grease fire people!  Use a wet towel or blanket, baking soda, or worst case fire extinguisher.   Jesus.

Do not throw Jesus onto a fire.  He just bought a new robe.


Also, Mexicans tend to eat a lot of spicy food and are somewhat combustible.  You'll risk pepper spraying yourself out of the kitchen instead of putting out the fire.
 
2013-11-01 12:56:38 PM  

DarkVader: farm machine: noitsnot: CSB:

One of my roommates after college came from an Ivy League school where they had full housekeeping and cooking done for them.

One Saturday morning, he decided to cook some eggs.  He knew that you were supposed to put something in the pan first, but he didn't know what.  So he just put some water in the pan, put it on the stove, cracked some eggs in, fired up the burner, and walked out.

Fifteen minutes later - smoke alarm and charred pan.  Love telling the story whenever possible, because - Water?  Really?

Sounds like someones never poached an egg before.

Yeah, that's what I was thinking.  Because yes, water, really.



It's no big deal for you guys to intentionally misunderstand, since you're so late to the party and all.

All the folks who got it rang in a day earlier :)
 
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