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(WFTV Orlando)   Man shot do death outside Whole Foods. Ironically, it wasn't a natural death   (wftv.com) divider line 47
    More: Florida, whole foods, Hillsborough County Sheriff's Office, fitness instructor, Whole Foods Markets  
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1697 clicks; posted to Main » on 30 Oct 2013 at 10:20 AM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



47 Comments   (+0 »)
   
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest
 
2013-10-30 09:18:12 AM  
Ugh. Mods, please correct that headline. Man shot do death?
 
2013-10-30 09:22:00 AM  
The argument probably started over a parking spot. Yeah sure, it SAYS there was a girl involved, but I've been to Whole Foods, I've seen what people actually get violent about there.
 
2013-10-30 10:04:54 AM  
♪♫♪  A man got shot near a Whole Foods today - Do death, do death... ♪♫♪
 
2013-10-30 10:13:22 AM  
See, at Whole Foods, even the language changes.
 
2013-10-30 10:24:32 AM  
Man shot, do death outside Whole Foods.
 
2013-10-30 10:24:42 AM  
Organically mined lead at least though right?
 
2013-10-30 10:25:49 AM  

IdBeCrazyIf: Organically mined lead at least though right?


Free-range weapons manufacturers.
 
2013-10-30 10:27:18 AM  

HMS_Blinkin: IdBeCrazyIf: Organically mined lead at least though right?

Free-range weapons manufacturers.


With only the best in Fair Trade gunpowder
 
2013-10-30 10:27:20 AM  

bdub77: Ugh. Mods, please correct that headline. Man shot do death?

/Typo is typo.


i.imgur.com
 
2013-10-30 10:29:13 AM  
Do Death?  He may be interested....
images1.wikia.nocookie.net
 
2013-10-30 10:29:35 AM  
You know who else does death?
 
2013-10-30 10:30:50 AM  
Please, let's not start the argument over the definition of irony.
 
2013-10-30 10:31:26 AM  
Apparently it got real.
/oblig
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2UFc1pr2yUU
 
2013-10-30 10:32:50 AM  
images.cdn.bigcartel.com
 
2013-10-30 10:35:08 AM  
Even despite the typo....

img.fark.net
 
2013-10-30 10:35:46 AM  

bdub77: Ugh. Mods, please correct that headline. Man shot do death?


Dat's wacist?
 
2013-10-30 10:44:39 AM  
Dear Shooter,

Next time, please provide a public service and also shoot anyone in the organic foods section.

Thanks,
Everyone Else
 
2013-10-30 10:47:14 AM  
♪♫♪ Do, a death, a tragic death... ♪♫♪
 
2013-10-30 10:49:57 AM  
When I say gluten free, I mean it.

/aaarrrgghh!!!!  You got blood on my Prius!
 
2013-10-30 10:51:51 AM  
Man shot outside Whole Foods--do da, do da.....
 
2013-10-30 11:06:45 AM  
let's just hope the Sheriff's office practices do diligence in prosecuting the killer.
 
2013-10-30 11:08:41 AM  
He's gwine to bleed all night; gwine to bleed all day...

/what's a 'gwine?'
 
2013-10-30 11:10:12 AM  
Man contracts lead poisoning at Whole Foods.
 
2013-10-30 11:10:14 AM  
Who did the subby have to blow to get this greenlit?  I've shiat better headlines than this.  All of them are sadly languishing in Redardedville, but still.
 
2013-10-30 11:11:10 AM  

surewewang: let's just hope the Sheriff's office practices do diligence in prosecuting the killer.


Initial reports suggest a legitimate case of self-defense,meaning that the shooter may be cleared after application of do process.
 
2013-10-30 11:11:50 AM  
The death sounds cruelty free, and I bet the dead dude lived under animal welfare standards of a 1 or 2. So that's good.
 
2013-10-30 11:16:34 AM  
It's a good thing the victim was armed with a gun, otherwise this might have had a tragic outcome.
 
2013-10-30 11:17:04 AM  
This is not ironic. It would be ironic if he were partially eaten by a bear.
 
2013-10-30 11:19:33 AM  
"How did he get it?"

"It was a natural death."

"Huh?"

"It's natural to die with half your head blown off."
 
2013-10-30 11:21:21 AM  

metatronarchetype: It's a good thing the victim was armed with a gun, otherwise this might have had a tragic outcome.


You are correct: had the victim of the now deceased man's assault witha a kitchen knife not been armed with a firearm his ability to defend himself may have been greatly reduced, resulting in his own death instead.
 
2013-10-30 11:21:50 AM  

FoxEWolf: bdub77: Ugh. Mods, please correct that headline. Man shot do death?

/Typo is typo.

[i.imgur.com image 380x240]


TheChaosPath: Even despite the typo....

[img.fark.net image 400x300]


No. Not typo. Braino. You can legitimately claim "typo" if two adjacent letters are interchanged, or if a letter whose key is horizontally adjacent to another letter is typed in its place. Neither is the case here. [T] and [D] are in two separate rows with an intervening key between them.
 
2013-10-30 11:39:35 AM  
The victim now has a bullet whole.
 
2013-10-30 11:51:28 AM  

Dimensio: surewewang: let's just hope the Sheriff's office practices do diligence in prosecuting the killer.

Initial reports suggest a legitimate case of self-defense,meaning that the shooter may be cleared after application of do process.


yeah because when I go to whole foods I always park around back near the dumpster and loading docks and walk all the way around the store.

I say this was a set up. the girl called and told him to meet her behind the store. then when he shows up he gets a "surprise!" and the man shoots him. they place a kitchen knife in his hand and use to the old "stand your ground" defense.
since he brought his own witness it's an open and shut case.
 
2013-10-30 11:54:46 AM  
I hear they use every part of the shooting victim.  So there's that.
 
2013-10-30 11:56:48 AM  

metatronarchetype: It's a good thing the victim was armed with a gun, otherwise this might have had a tragic outcome.


Really?  You have issue with a psychotic "fitness instructor" for his girlfriend threatening an innocent guy with a knife getting shot and the victim getting away without a scratch??  Seriously?
 
2013-10-30 11:58:25 AM  

Dimensio: metatronarchetype: It's a good thing the victim was armed with a gun, otherwise this might have had a tragic outcome.

You are correct: had the victim of the now deceased man's assault witha a kitchen knife not been armed with a firearm his ability to defend himself may have been greatly reduced, resulting in his own death instead.


you're assuming their story is the truth though.

I'd like to know more. like why were they parked behind the store? how did this guy know they were there?  what was his supposed motive for bringing a kitchen knife?
 
2013-10-30 12:01:41 PM  
Must have complained about the prices.
 
2013-10-30 12:06:11 PM  

AngryDragon: metatronarchetype: It's a good thing the victim was armed with a gun, otherwise this might have had a tragic outcome.

Really?  You have issue with a psychotic "fitness instructor" for his girlfriend threatening an innocent guy with a knife getting shot and the victim getting away without a scratch??  Seriously?


You know, I haven't had enough coffee yet. Reading comprehension shot. Carry on.
 
2013-10-30 12:36:39 PM  

IdBeCrazyIf: Organically mined lead at least though right?


It must be from free-range supernovas.
 
2013-10-30 12:45:51 PM  

Hobodeluxe: Dimensio: surewewang: let's just hope the Sheriff's office practices do diligence in prosecuting the killer.

Initial reports suggest a legitimate case of self-defense,meaning that the shooter may be cleared after application of do process.

yeah because when I go to whole foods I always park around back near the dumpster and loading docks and walk all the way around the store.

I say this was a set up. the girl called and told him to meet her behind the store. then when he shows up he gets a "surprise!" and the man shoots him. they place a kitchen knife in his hand and use to the old "stand your ground" defense.
since he brought his own witness it's an open and shut case.


You should report the extensive evidence that you have observed to derive your conclusion to the relevant district attorney's office.
 
2013-10-30 01:32:50 PM  

LostInTranslation: Please, let's not start the argument over the definition of irony.


Now, that would be ironic....

/ sorry
 
2013-10-30 02:02:49 PM  

COMALite J: FoxEWolf: bdub77: Ugh. Mods, please correct that headline. Man shot do death?

/Typo is typo.

[i.imgur.com image 380x240]

TheChaosPath: Even despite the typo....

[img.fark.net image 400x300]

No. Not typo. Braino. You can legitimately claim "typo" if two adjacent letters are interchanged, or if a letter whose key is horizontally adjacent to another letter is typed in its place. Neither is the case here. [T] and [D] are in two separate rows with an intervening key between them.


False, you hunt and pecker.

/ huntin' pecker.
 
2013-10-30 02:30:51 PM  

COMALite J: No. Not typo. Braino. You can legitimately claim "typo" if two adjacent letters are interchanged, or if a letter whose key is horizontally adjacent to another letter is typed in its place. Neither is the case here. [T] and [D] are in two separate rows with an intervening key between them.


Wrong. According to Merriam-Webster, a typo is ANY typographical error.

Full Definition of TYPO: an error (as of spelling) in typed or typeset material

Examples of TYPO: I spotted three typos on the menu.

Origin of TYPO: short for typographical (error)

First Known Use: 1878
 
2013-10-30 02:36:18 PM  
Irony? Is that what lead the coppers to cesium ?
 
2013-10-30 05:54:01 PM  

bighairyguy: Dear Shooter,

Next time, please provide a public service and also shoot anyone in the organic foods section.

Thanks,
Everyone Else


I hear pesticide consumption can make one violent and irrational!
 
2013-10-31 03:11:54 AM  

bdub77: Ugh. Mods, please correct that headline. Man shot do death?


When I see a misspelling like this, I always check comments to make sure I did not miss a joke.
 
2013-10-31 01:05:12 PM  

7FARK7: bdub77: Ugh. Mods, please correct that headline. Man shot do death?

When I see a misspelling like this, I always check comments to make sure I did not miss a joke.


For some reason, nobody has mentioned that Whole Foods currently has on sale the "do" berries from New Zealand. Only use them in your juicer or breadmaker (the mauve ones are the sweet ones).
 
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