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(NBC News)   15 year old girl who ran away with 37 year old man found safe, with helpful "I'm bangin' a 15 year old girl" perp pic   (usnews.nbcnews.com) divider line 145
    More: Followup, WDIV, NBC News  
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22622 clicks; posted to Main » on 30 Oct 2013 at 10:01 AM (38 weeks ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2013-10-30 09:10:28 AM
15 will get you 20
 
2013-10-30 09:11:28 AM
same pic as Monday's article.

nothing new here.

/except that they've been found
 
vpb [TotalFark]
2013-10-30 09:21:06 AM
So the family let a 37 year old dude take their 15 year old girl on a hiking trip?  It sounds like something isn't right in that household.
 
2013-10-30 09:26:52 AM

Tellingthem: 15 will get you 20


but that's all right, Cause they're rocking and a rolling' on a Livingston Saturday Night.

vpb: So the family let a 37 year old dude take their 15 year old girl on a hiking trip?  It sounds like something isn't right in that household.


Yup, stripper in training right there.
 
2013-10-30 09:36:44 AM
And he's halfway to "THIS guy" thumbs.
 
2013-10-30 09:41:56 AM
This "relationship" started well before the age of 15. If he didn't act now, she would've been [insert pedobear "too old!".jpg here] a couple years from now

Sick man.
 
2013-10-30 10:02:51 AM
The punishment for someone farking a 15 year-old girl, should be to live with a 15-year-old girl.
 
2013-10-30 10:03:22 AM
Who stocked up on Zima before it was discontinued? This guy.
 
2013-10-30 10:04:35 AM
Damn dude, you could have waited at least a year and then they couldn't touch you. Age of consent is 16 in Michigan, and if I remember right they can be legally emancipated despite parental wishes as well.
 
2013-10-30 10:05:06 AM

vpb: So the family let a 37 year old dude take their 15 year old girl on a hiking trip?  It sounds like something isn't right in that household.


Alternatively, he could've been viewed as the Uncle-From-Another-Mother.
 
2013-10-30 10:05:07 AM
"Schwartz told   on Monday that she felt betrayed by the man who "was like a brother to me" and that the pair who met at church had never showed signs that they had feelings for one another."

It's what Jesus wanted.
 
2013-10-30 10:05:34 AM

vpb: So the family let a 37 year old dude take their 15 year old girl on a hiking trip?  It sounds like something isn't right in that household.


www.caringforourchildrenfoundation.org
 
2013-10-30 10:05:56 AM

vpb: So the family let a 37 year old dude take their 15 year old girl on a hiking trip?  It sounds like something isn't right in that household.


Well they did meet at church. And no one you meet at church is capable of innapropiate behavior with your underage kid. I don't know how that system failed here.
 
2013-10-30 10:06:08 AM

calbert: same pic as Monday's article.

nothing new here.

/except that they've been found


Hence the followup tag.
 
2013-10-30 10:07:27 AM
What has two thumbs and gets a thrill out of statutory rape?

media2.s-nbcnews.com

this guy
 
2013-10-30 10:08:49 AM
Who brought the wine coolers and condoms

media2.s-nbcnews.com

This Guy
 
2013-10-30 10:08:50 AM
Hi photo gives me the chills.
 
2013-10-30 10:09:12 AM
"....And later on that night, him and his entire family were herded outside in front of their homes and beaten viciously by police."

/wishful thinking
 
2013-10-30 10:09:50 AM
Yeah, that guy doesn't look like a sleazeball at all. Nope.
 
2013-10-30 10:09:59 AM
I'm more concerned with the weight loss miracle at the bottom of the page that looks like a cross between a marital aid and a goeduck
 
2013-10-30 10:10:07 AM

padraig: The punishment for someone farking a 15 year-old girl, should be to live with a 15-year-old girl.


That's the part of these stories I can never wrap my head around. Even if she's a well-developed fifteen year old girl and he just completely lacks the most basic level of self control requested by society....

... she's still a fifteen year old girl. Anybody who has ever had to spend any time around them knows that teenage girls are just.... they're just goddamn awful. Like, physical-pain-inducing-stupid type of a awful. Listening to a teenage girl talk for any amount of time is like putting your ear against a jet engine at full throttle. I'd rather drill my ear drums out than spend five minutes in the presence of one.
 
2013-10-30 10:10:32 AM

GonzoNihilist: calbert: same pic as Monday's article.

nothing new here.

/except that they've been found

Hence the followup tag.


no sh*t. really?

half of subby's headline is referencing a pic that was in Monday's article about their disappearance.

remove that part from the headline and I doubt that this would've gone green.
 
2013-10-30 10:10:38 AM
I read that letting the tv babysit your kids is bad, so now I dump them off at church instead.
 
2013-10-30 10:11:07 AM
WHO'S GOT 2 THUMBS AND GETTING AN ASS POUNDING?
media2.s-nbcnews.com
 
2013-10-30 10:12:01 AM
img.fark.net

Look, she's nice looking and all, but I have to find just the right buyer. In the mean time I have to feed her and put a roof over her head. I'll give you $500 for her.
 
2013-10-30 10:12:44 AM
sayanythingblog.com

15 year old?  Best I can do is a used 19 year old.  Take it or leave it.
 
2013-10-30 10:13:28 AM

skozlaw: padraig: The punishment for someone farking a 15 year-old girl, should be to live with a 15-year-old girl.

That's the part of these stories I can never wrap my head around. Even if she's a well-developed fifteen year old girl and he just completely lacks the most basic level of self control requested by society....

... she's still a fifteen year old girl. Anybody who has ever had to spend any time around them knows that teenage girls are just.... they're just goddamn awful. Like, physical-pain-inducing-stupid type of a awful. Listening to a teenage girl talk for any amount of time is like putting your ear against a jet engine at full throttle. I'd rather drill my ear drums out than spend five minutes in the presence of one.


Silence is golden.
Duct Tape is silver.
 
2013-10-30 10:13:42 AM
img.fark.net
 
2013-10-30 10:14:13 AM
cdn.ph.upi.com
Listen, I don't know much about running off with a girl that's 15, but I know a guy that might... let me give him a call...
 
2013-10-30 10:14:26 AM

theBigBigEye: "....And later on that night, him and his entire family were herded outside in front of their homes and beaten viciously by police."

/wishful thinking


I did Nazi that coming.
 
2013-10-30 10:14:28 AM

skozlaw: ... she's still a fifteen year old girl. Anybody who has ever had to spend any time around them knows that teenage girls are just.... they're just goddamn awful. Like, physical-pain-inducing-stupid type of a awful. Listening to a teenage girl talk for any amount of time is like putting your ear against a jet engine at full throttle. I'd rather drill my ear drums out than spend five minutes in the presence of one.


I've met some pretty well developed, mature, and well read teenagers that can carry themselves pretty well in an adult conversation. However I contend we are thinking about this all wrong, the guy couldn't even wait a year to get to legal status, I say he's partially retarded and suffers age regression.
 
2013-10-30 10:14:28 AM

teenytinycornteeth: I'm more concerned with the weight loss miracle at the bottom of the page that looks like a cross between a marital aid and a goeduck


What kind of sick, sad world do you live in where a geoduck is not considered a marital aid?
 
2013-10-30 10:14:32 AM
img.fark.net

She was fifteen going on thirty-five, Doc, and she told me she was eighteen and she was very willing, you know what I mean. She might have been fifteen, but when you get that little red beaver right up there in front of ya, I don't think it's crazy at all and I don't think you do either...No man alive could resist that.
 
2013-10-30 10:14:41 AM
And here they are on a date:


img.fark.net
 
2013-10-30 10:14:48 AM

skozlaw: padraig: The punishment for someone farking a 15 year-old girl, should be to live with a 15-year-old girl.

That's the part of these stories I can never wrap my head around. Even if she's a well-developed fifteen year old girl and he just completely lacks the most basic level of self control requested by society....

... she's still a fifteen year old girl. Anybody who has ever had to spend any time around them knows that teenage girls are just.... they're just goddamn awful. Like, physical-pain-inducing-stupid type of a awful. Listening to a teenage girl talk for any amount of time is like putting your ear against a jet engine at full throttle. I'd rather drill my ear drums out than spend five minutes in the presence of one.


Maybe she was an "old soul." Or maybe they're all just trash. It's gotta be one of those two.
 
2013-10-30 10:15:07 AM

kbronsito: vpb: ...And no one you meet at church is capable of innapropiate behavior with your underage kid....


...especially the priests...
 
2013-10-30 10:15:36 AM

skozlaw: padraig: The punishment for someone farking a 15 year-old girl, should be to live with a 15-year-old girl.

That's the part of these stories I can never wrap my head around. Even if she's a well-developed fifteen year old girl and he just completely lacks the most basic level of self control requested by society....

... she's still a fifteen year old girl. Anybody who has ever had to spend any time around them knows that teenage girls are just.... they're just goddamn awful. Like, physical-pain-inducing-stupid type of a awful. Listening to a teenage girl talk for any amount of time is like putting your ear against a jet engine at full throttle. I'd rather drill my ear drums out than spend five minutes in the presence of one.


Whereas teenage boys are nothing but eloquent discussions of social issues and politics, the best of manners and the funniest jokes...a true joy for everyone.

Or wait...maybe EVERY young adolescent is an awkward, half developed adult.
 
2013-10-30 10:18:42 AM
WTF?  dont fark kids asshole!  I hope they throw him in gen pop.
 
2013-10-30 10:19:41 AM

Evil Mackerel: theBigBigEye: "....And later on that night, him and his entire family were herded outside in front of their homes and beaten viciously by police."

/wishful thinking

I did Nazi that coming.


I didn't either. However, I think the guy in TFA did, but couldn't wait, Soviet himself get into all kinds of trouble.
 
2013-10-30 10:19:51 AM

teenytinycornteeth: Or wait...maybe EVERY young adolescent is an awkward, half developed adult.


Maybe, but the subject of this article's not bangin' a dude, now is he?
 
2013-10-30 10:20:14 AM
a.abcnews.com

He heard that her vagina was haunted, so he was checking it for emf readings.
 
2013-10-30 10:20:15 AM
"Teen who ran away with 37-year-old family friend found: cops"

GREAT headline right there.
 
m00
2013-10-30 10:20:50 AM

Raug the Dwarf: 15 year old? Best I can do is a used 19 year old. Take it or leave it.


I'll take it. How used though?
 
2013-10-30 10:21:28 AM
Now the girl's sister's rich suitor sweeps in and forces the guy to marry her, right?
 
2013-10-30 10:22:13 AM

teenytinycornteeth: skozlaw: padraig: The punishment for someone farking a 15 year-old girl, should be to live with a 15-year-old girl.

That's the part of these stories I can never wrap my head around. Even if she's a well-developed fifteen year old girl and he just completely lacks the most basic level of self control requested by society....

... she's still a fifteen year old girl. Anybody who has ever had to spend any time around them knows that teenage girls are just.... they're just goddamn awful. Like, physical-pain-inducing-stupid type of a awful. Listening to a teenage girl talk for any amount of time is like putting your ear against a jet engine at full throttle. I'd rather drill my ear drums out than spend five minutes in the presence of one.

Whereas teenage boys are nothing but eloquent discussions of social issues and politics, the best of manners and the funniest jokes...a true joy for everyone.

Or wait...maybe EVERY young adolescent is an awkward, half developed adult.


15-yo boys are usually far more immature than 15-yo girls, and not that good a company ever. But 15-yo girls usally think that being "more mature" than boys their age mean that they are mature.
No, they are just less immature.

And teenage girls are pure evil incarnate.
 
2013-10-30 10:24:26 AM

padraig: The punishment for someone farking a 15 year-old girl, should be to live with a 15-year-old girl.


It used to be...I believe it was called a "Shotgun Wedding"
 
2013-10-30 10:25:08 AM
Stick to the half your age plus seven rule.
 
2013-10-30 10:25:47 AM

skozlaw: teenytinycornteeth: Or wait...maybe EVERY young adolescent is an awkward, half developed adult.

Maybe, but the subject of this article's not bangin' a dude, now is he?


Actually, the subject of the article is the 37 year old man.  We know nothing of the 15 year old girl, just your assumption. I just think it's funny that people go out of their way to launch into huge monologues on the horrors of teenage girls (as if they're SUPPOSED to have all the poise and eloquence of a grown woman) but you rarely hear that about boys.  (you hear that they're goofy and funny and hormone driven but not "pure evil incarnate")
 
2013-10-30 10:26:11 AM

padraig: teenytinycornteeth: skozlaw: padraig: The punishment for someone farking a 15 year-old girl, should be to live with a 15-year-old girl.

That's the part of these stories I can never wrap my head around. Even if she's a well-developed fifteen year old girl and he just completely lacks the most basic level of self control requested by society....

... she's still a fifteen year old girl. Anybody who has ever had to spend any time around them knows that teenage girls are just.... they're just goddamn awful. Like, physical-pain-inducing-stupid type of a awful. Listening to a teenage girl talk for any amount of time is like putting your ear against a jet engine at full throttle. I'd rather drill my ear drums out than spend five minutes in the presence of one.

Whereas teenage boys are nothing but eloquent discussions of social issues and politics, the best of manners and the funniest jokes...a true joy for everyone.

Or wait...maybe EVERY young adolescent is an awkward, half developed adult.

15-yo boys are usually far more immature than 15-yo girls, and not that good a company ever. But 15-yo girls usally think that being "more mature" than boys their age mean that they are mature.
No, they are just less immature.

And teenage girls are pure evil incarnate.


I know a guy who has two sons from his first marriage and a 2.5-year-old girl with his current wife. He was telling a bunch of us the other week that hands down, girls are way easier than boys to raise. (I don't remember if this was before or after his daughter cut up his passport.) I told him to wait until she turned 14 and then come back and let us know if girls are easier.
 
2013-10-30 10:26:19 AM

thisisarepeat: WTF?  dont fark kids asshole!  I hope they throw him in gen pop.


But, you won't get 'em prego that way...
 
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