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(Brentwood Gazette)   Drivers told to take extra care when driving through forests. Deers like to fark at this time of year, you see   (brentwoodgazette.co.uk) divider line 39
    More: Spiffy, Epping Forest, forests  
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1833 clicks; posted to Main » on 28 Oct 2013 at 3:21 PM (46 weeks ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



39 Comments   (+0 »)
   
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2013-10-28 03:24:34 PM
More like Effing forest
 
2013-10-28 03:25:21 PM
They should really put those deer crossings in a safer place.
 
2013-10-28 03:26:52 PM
Do a deer, a female deer...
 
2013-10-28 03:27:17 PM
How do the deer know where to cross anyway?
 
2013-10-28 03:27:51 PM
davidmixon806.tripod.com
 
2013-10-28 03:28:56 PM
That's an Elk crossing sign.
 
2013-10-28 03:28:57 PM
images.wikia.com
 
2013-10-28 03:29:36 PM

blatz514: [davidmixon806.tripod.com image 125x71]


Dear blatz, always hit preview...ya farking moran
 
2013-10-28 03:32:04 PM
Nah, nah, nah.  It's all those damned deer murders rampaging through the forests with their AR-47s.  The few surviving members of this incredibly endangered species flee in fear which forces them into the roads and oncoming traffic.
 
2013-10-28 03:34:02 PM
Oh dear. Just think of all the doe you would have to spend if you hit one.
 
d23 [TotalFark]
2013-10-28 03:36:52 PM
Driving through the forest?

Here's is an idea: STAY ON THE farkING PAVEMENT!  Don't drive THROUGH the forest, jackass.
 
2013-10-28 03:37:03 PM
If you don't mind incredibly offensive language, watch Louis CK's bit on deer.
 
2013-10-28 03:37:49 PM
Look, people. Deer are like squirrels. Keep your speed consistent and don't slam the brakes when you see them. They have the timing all worked-out. Your doing something stupid is what causes wrecks.

Of course, you can't account for the crazy ones.
 
2013-10-28 03:42:43 PM

fappomatic: Look, people. Deer are like squirrels. Keep your speed consistent and don't slam the brakes when you see them. They have the timing all worked-out. Your doing something stupid is what causes wrecks.

Of course, you can't account for the crazy ones.


Keep your speed down through deer crossings. It gives you more time to react. Deer ain't gonna run into a car doing 15 mph, but it's not very good at judging 75 mph. Also, you have more time to avoid at 15 mph than at 75 mph.
 
2013-10-28 03:44:46 PM

blorpen: They should really put those deer crossings in a safer place.


agreed

so does she

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RFCrJleggrI
 
2013-10-28 03:45:58 PM
Another good reason to strap your beer down coming back from the store.
If you hit a deer and you spill that iced cold 6 pack you were saving for later that was just sitting, unrestrained in the back seat, the cops will call it an alcohol involved accident, whether or not you blow pretty numbers.
 
2013-10-28 03:48:24 PM

JungleBoogie: fappomatic: Look, people. Deer are like squirrels. Keep your speed consistent and don't slam the brakes when you see them. They have the timing all worked-out. Your doing something stupid is what causes wrecks.

Of course, you can't account for the crazy ones.

Keep your speed down through deer crossings. It gives you more time to react. Deer ain't gonna run into a car doing 15 mph, but it's not very good at judging 75 mph. Also, you have more time to avoid at 15 mph than at 75 mph.


LOLWUT

You think deer only cross at areas that are marked with deer crossing signs?  Where I grew up, the entire county was a deer crossing area.
 
2013-10-28 03:48:54 PM

JungleBoogie: fappomatic: Look, people. Deer are like squirrels. Keep your speed consistent and don't slam the brakes when you see them. They have the timing all worked-out. Your doing something stupid is what causes wrecks.

Of course, you can't account for the crazy ones.

Keep your speed down through deer crossings. It gives you more time to react. Deer ain't gonna run into a car doing 15 mph, but it's not very good at judging 75 mph. Also, you have more time to avoid at 15 mph than at 75 mph.


I was almost hit in my car by two deer one time. I had stopped my car because a 3rd deer had jumped in front of me and I know that where there is one deer, there is usually another one right behind, especially during the rut. Just then a doe being chased by a buck ran at full speed right around my car. There was one right in front of my car, one behind. It was both scary and awesome at the same time. They couldn't have been more than a foot from my bumpers.
 
2013-10-28 03:52:36 PM

skinink: Do a deer, a female deer...


It is a very good thing iPads don't have normal keyboards...
 
2013-10-28 03:56:01 PM

smoky2010: JungleBoogie: fappomatic: Look, people. Deer are like squirrels. Keep your speed consistent and don't slam the brakes when you see them. They have the timing all worked-out. Your doing something stupid is what causes wrecks.

Of course, you can't account for the crazy ones.

Keep your speed down through deer crossings. It gives you more time to react. Deer ain't gonna run into a car doing 15 mph, but it's not very good at judging 75 mph. Also, you have more time to avoid at 15 mph than at 75 mph.

I was almost hit in my car by two deer one time. I had stopped my car because a 3rd deer had jumped in front of me and I know that where there is one deer, there is usually another one right behind, especially during the rut. Just then a doe being chased by a buck ran at full speed right around my car. There was one right in front of my car, one behind. It was both scary and awesome at the same time. They couldn't have been more than a foot from my bumpers.


I live out in the country. The entire 30 mile drive is a deer crossing. I have a small pickup. Two does ran into the side of the truck and a third hit the side and flipped over the top into the bed. It sounded like the back of my truck was filled with concrete footballs. Looked like it, too.

15mph or 75...deer are going to do what they do. There can't be more than a few hundredths of a second difference in reaction time. That does you no good. What happens most often is the deer run into the side of your vehicle, not run in front of you. They have reaction time issues combined with headlight dazzle. They see darkness behind the headlights and think their way is clear.
 
2013-10-28 04:07:09 PM
Someone should write a letter regarding the sexual escapades of the deer in the houses in which they are pent up.
 
2013-10-28 04:08:18 PM
"Deers"?
 
2013-10-28 04:13:07 PM

Loaf's Tray: "Deers"?


Defense Enrollment and Eligibility Reporting System
 
WGJ
2013-10-28 04:23:23 PM
Yep, you gotta be careful when the does are heading into town to blow a few bucks.
 
2013-10-28 04:31:23 PM
For today is the day when they sort it out, sort it out...

/Along the Forest Road, there's hundreds of cars - luxury cars.
 
2013-10-28 04:46:28 PM
A few years ago, my brother-in-law was riding his motorcycle on a country highway in North Georgia. A deer came crashing down a wooded ridge and landed right on top of him. Killed the deer, totaled the bike and farked my BIL right up. He had bruised ribs and all kinds of painful boo-boos.
 
2013-10-28 04:54:29 PM

blorpen: They should really put those deer crossings in a safer place.


You dont happen to be the pperson whose phone call to a radio station is on youtube by any chance?
 
2013-10-28 04:56:54 PM

Loaf's Tray: "Deers"?


DearS.
 
2013-10-28 05:06:16 PM
cdn1.arkive.org

Bucksecks?
 
2013-10-28 05:12:09 PM

uncleacid: That's an Elk crossing sign.


I believe that actually it's a red deer crossing sign.
 
2013-10-28 05:37:33 PM

fappomatic: Look, people. Deer are like squirrels. Keep your speed consistent and don't slam the brakes when you see them. They have the timing all worked-out. Your doing something stupid is what causes wrecks.

Of course, you can't account for the crazy ones.


This time of the year, they're *all* stupid. Horny and stupid.

I hit five in one night. One broke the headlight on my car, the other four were just side glancing blows on the country back roads to my house.
 
2013-10-28 05:46:35 PM

FatherChaos: [cdn1.arkive.org image 650x425]

Bucksecks?


Thanks. Now I need to get that make into an outline with the caption for my truck.
 
2013-10-28 05:47:46 PM

DarthBart: fappomatic: Look, people. Deer are like squirrels. Keep your speed consistent and don't slam the brakes when you see them. They have the timing all worked-out. Your doing something stupid is what causes wrecks.

Of course, you can't account for the crazy ones.

This time of the year, they're *all* stupid. Horny and stupid.

I hit five in one night. One broke the headlight on my car, the other four were just side glancing blows on the country back roads to my house.


Horny and stupid. That's exactly right ..

i43.photobucket.com
 
2013-10-28 05:49:46 PM

Clemkadidlefark: Horny and stupid. That's exactly right ..


So, Teenagers?
 
2013-10-28 05:53:57 PM

Type random string here: For today is the day when they sort it out, sort it out...

/Along the Forest Road, there's hundreds of cars - luxury cars.


Came here for SEBTP reference. Leaving satisfied.
 
2013-10-28 06:17:42 PM
Growing up in rural east central forested part of Alberta the most important rule of the road is, if you see a deer run across the highway slow down, there's always more behind it. My dumbass brother ignored me when I shouted this out after a whitetail pranced across in front if us and we nailed the next one in the hip, shattering it. To this day I hate the liberal gun hating crowd who's political correctness made it unacceptable for the average schmo to have a shotgun in his/her vehicle for just in case. We had a sledgehammer in the box of the truck but the deer wouldn't let me get close to it and god knows what kind of damage and pain it was inflicting on itself trying to scrabble away from my approach. So we had to cal the local fish and game warden to come dispatch it and 3 hours later on our return trip the poor thing was still alive, having dragged itself into the ditch. I suppose some hungry coyotes fed well that evening and that's the way nature works.

  /CSB?
//keep shotgun and slugs in trunk during rural road trips ever since
 
2013-10-28 06:37:22 PM

fappomatic: 15mph or 75...deer are going to do what they do. There can't be more than a few hundredths of a second difference in reaction time. That does you no good.


Some data (you can go to Google and type "15 mph to feet per second" to double check):

15 mph = 22 feet/sec (7 meters/sec)
35 mph = 51 feet/sec (15 meters/sec)
45 mph = 66 feet/sec (20 meters/sec)
55 mph = 81 feet/sec (24 meters/sec)
65 mph = 95 feet/sec (29 meter/sec)
75 mph = 110 feet/sec (33 meters/sec)

So, even a reduction from 55 mph to 45 mph gives you 15 extra feet per second. Don't need to miss the deer - or whatever obstacle - by a lot, just a few feet.

Also, when driving in rural areas, high beams (with no oncoming traffic) help because animals' eyes will shine back in the reflection. Also, increased clarity of surroundings, better to see animals by the side of the road.
 
2013-10-28 07:29:35 PM

DrewFL: If you don't mind incredibly offensive language, watch Louis CK's bit on deer.


This. Very much this. It's on his "Chewed Up" show. Last time I checked it was on Netflix. It's hilarious.

FCN deer.
 
2013-10-28 07:31:07 PM

notyomama: A few years ago, my brother-in-law was riding his motorcycle on a country highway in North Georgia. A deer came crashing down a wooded ridge and landed right on top of him. Killed the deer, totaled the bike and farked my BIL right up. He had bruised ribs and all kinds of painful boo-boos.


I think I met him or heard folks who know him tell the story.

I hate deer unless they're on a plate.
 
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