If you can read this, either the style sheet didn't load or you have an older browser that doesn't support style sheets. Try clearing your browser cache and refreshing the page.

(KFOR Oklahoma City)   Satan: "Okay, let's get this meeting started. Ba'al the Flayer, nice work on your last job. Sch'uzdra the Mind devourer, keep up the good work. Uh, Dru'ush the homosexual rape demon? We're going to have to ask you dial it back a bit"   (kfor.com) divider line 136
    More: Dumbass, Oklahoma City, Bibles, Satans, broken windows, Oklahoma County  
•       •       •

18732 clicks; posted to Main » on 28 Oct 2013 at 1:28 PM (25 weeks ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



136 Comments   (+0 »)
   
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest

First | « | 1 | 2 | 3 | » | Last | Show all
 
2013-10-28 11:49:04 AM
Anderson told officers he met a "possessed homosexual demon" who wanted drugs from him and performed sexual acts on him.

So... he was at a pretty awesome Halloween party?
 
2013-10-28 12:15:42 PM
At the hospital, officers said Anderson told them he had not done anything wrong, that he was just remodeling his house.

That's just awesome.
 
2013-10-28 12:19:41 PM
FTFA: He said he "wasn't gay, just high" and when he came to his senses, he couldn't believe he let the male demon touch him.

upload.wikimedia.org

Yeah, that's what Asmodeus said!

Things have never been the same for poor Jeremy J. Anderson  he dumped the Queen of the Demonweb Pits.
 
2013-10-28 12:27:16 PM
Moments later he admitted he knew he needed to be on medication.

[you_don't_say.jpg]

As hilarious as this story is, hopefully this man will get the help he needs.
 
2013-10-28 12:28:30 PM
He must have slept with our governor.
 
2013-10-28 12:29:57 PM
Ah, mental illness. You never cease to deliver a barrel of laughs.
 
2013-10-28 12:57:15 PM

Somacandra: FTFA: He said he "wasn't gay, just high" and when he came to his senses, he couldn't believe he let the male demon touch him.

[upload.wikimedia.org image 213x270]

Yeah, that's what Asmodeus said!

Things have never been the same for poor Jeremy J. Anderson  he dumped the Queen of the Demonweb Pits.

img.fark.net
It clearly spells out in the Monster Manual that Orcus was the Rape Demon, I mean Asmo is a Lawful Evil DEVIL Dude!  Get it right!
 
2013-10-28 01:05:19 PM
So, he needed meds, but I also wonder if he self medicated with some bath salts.

/bath salts.........not even once
 
2013-10-28 01:14:47 PM

clownyclownzomby: He must have slept with our governor.


So you're saying he's Fallin on hard times?
 
2013-10-28 01:31:08 PM
So he's an Oklahomo?
 
2013-10-28 01:33:14 PM
What about Gozer the Gozerian?  Is he still cool?
 
2013-10-28 01:34:02 PM
Do not taunt the homosexual rape demon.
 
2013-10-28 01:34:14 PM
What the fark was this guy on?
 
2013-10-28 01:34:18 PM
typical Swede
 
2013-10-28 01:34:21 PM

hardinparamedic: Ah, mental illness. You never cease to deliver a barrel of laughs.


That's why god put them on this earth, after all.
 
2013-10-28 01:34:38 PM
Let's at least commend the officers for not medicating him with lead after the tasers didn't work the first time.
 
2013-10-28 01:34:48 PM

"When that didn't work they tried to taze him to bring him under control but Anderson ripped the probes from his skin and yelled the tazer wouldn't affect him."



"No no. Don't do that, don't do that. If you shoot him you'll just make him mad."


www.stancourtney.com

 
2013-10-28 01:34:49 PM
I'm sure there are ways to exorcise homosexual demons that don't involve fire, but I guess that works as well.
 
2013-10-28 01:34:58 PM
I remember him from the cracked version of Dialbo I picked up a few weeks back. You had to fight Ball and Dialbo to save the world. I was a moonk in it. It was pretty cool.
 
2013-10-28 01:35:17 PM
Oh, everybody knows the type... as soon as they cum they are all jumping around yelling about how they aren't gay.
 
2013-10-28 01:35:20 PM
Funny, he didn't look Dru'ush
 
2013-10-28 01:35:53 PM
Funny, he didn't look Dru'ush.
 
2013-10-28 01:35:53 PM
Came for the bath salts reference, leaving satisfied.
 
2013-10-28 01:36:10 PM
I remember so old comic from the 80s which had the old guy from Up, Andy Dick, and generic 50s guy talking about how the gay will destroy society. The cover had a bunch of protesting zombies marching on Washington.
 
2013-10-28 01:36:33 PM
images2.wikia.nocookie.net

Approves.
 
2013-10-28 01:36:35 PM

bhcompy: What about Gozer the Gozerian?  Is he still cool?


IF SOMEONE ASKS YOU IF YOU ARE A DEMON, YOU SAY *YES*.
 
2013-10-28 01:36:41 PM
Man, this shiat never happens to me.  I only meet regular, run-of-the-mill heterosexual rape demons.
 
2013-10-28 01:36:42 PM
I'm a little surprised (and relieved) that the officers didn't shoot him. Nice.
 
2013-10-28 01:37:03 PM

bhcompy: What about Gozer the Gozerian?  Is he still cool?


Sure, if you don't mind spending time inside a giant slor. Kinda the opposite problem of this guy.
 
2013-10-28 01:37:29 PM

Bermuda59: Funny, he didn't look Dru'ush


I see your Schwartz is as big as mine.
 
2013-10-28 01:38:15 PM
Do an internet video search for excited delirium.

Zombies, they indeed walk among us.

/not kidding
 
2013-10-28 01:38:39 PM
"smoke-blinded scuffle" 

This phrase is more disturbing than the actual story.
 
2013-10-28 01:39:13 PM

what_now: What the fark was this guy on?


Well, it started with Bruce on him, then it got dark, and I didn't see the rest.
 
2013-10-28 01:39:13 PM
Dru'ush was just looking to do a few bumps, dance, and have a good time. Its not his fault the guy got some bad molly.

Besides, the guy came on to him.
 
2013-10-28 01:39:46 PM
Homosexual rape demon? Hah, The Simpsons did it first
 
2013-10-28 01:39:50 PM

I AM THE GOAT: Came for the bath salts reference, leaving satisfied.


Apparently demons have day jobs running skeevy gas stations and convenience stores.
 
2013-10-28 01:39:54 PM

UrinalPooper: Let's at least commend the officers for not medicating him with lead after the tasers didn't work the first time.


This. I'm shocked that he cops didn't shoot him.  There are so many stories about the use of lethal force to end what I consider (as an outsider) to be relatively non-violent interactions, and I half-expected this one to end up with the crazy guy getting killed.
 
2013-10-28 01:40:42 PM
www.themovies.co.za
 
2013-10-28 01:41:03 PM

Sybarite: At the hospital, officers said Anderson told them he had not done anything wrong, that he was just remodeling his house.

That's just awesome.


The guy sounds like he might be cool when he's properly medicated.
 
2013-10-28 01:41:28 PM

miss diminutive: Moments later he admitted he knew he needed to be on medication.

[you_don't_say.jpg]

As hilarious as this story is, hopefully this man will get the help he needs.


Nah, that would require universal health care and a culture that doesn't stigmatize mental illness. Instead, let's just let him buy a bunch of semi-automatic weapons.
 
2013-10-28 01:41:52 PM
"Officers said Anderson said if he would have had a gun, he would have shot and killed his neighbors and then shot and killed officers when they arrived."

Police always enjoy hearing this - supprised they held back and only tased him. Glad to hear it though...
 
2013-10-28 01:41:56 PM
Great. Now I just want to play In Nomine again.
 
2013-10-28 01:42:12 PM
What a Dru'ush-bag.
 
2013-10-28 01:42:39 PM
That's why you dont live in apartments. get a cheap rental home especially if you have kids. Paper thin walls separate your wife/children from this guy, meth lab, prostitutes, smoker who fall asleep

/even "good" apartment complexes
 
2013-10-28 01:42:56 PM

error 303: Great. Now I just want to play In Nomine again.


Me too.  Do you have her number?
 
2013-10-28 01:44:29 PM

what_now: What the fark was this guy on?

"


Are you referring to the anti-crazy drugs he stopped taking, or are you wondering what drug you would have to take to act that way?
 
2013-10-28 01:45:32 PM

Agnes Gonxha's Confidant: That's why you dont live in apartments. get a cheap rental home especially if you have kids. Paper thin walls separate your wife/children from this guy, meth lab, prostitutes, smoker who fall asleep

/even "good" apartment complexes


Mowing and raking are worth it to not live in a home connected to other people's homes.
 
2013-10-28 01:46:21 PM
Came for the DnD References, leaving satisfied.
 
2013-10-28 01:46:24 PM

Jeng: what_now: What the fark was this guy on?"


Are you referring to the anti-crazy drugs he stopped taking, or are you wondering what drug you would have to take to act that way?


How can you tell the difference between an unmedicated schizophrenic and someone on a bad trip?
 
2013-10-28 01:47:16 PM

DreamyAltarBoy: Do not taunt the homosexual rape demon.


Good luck applying it to your forehead, too.
 
Displayed 50 of 136 comments

First | « | 1 | 2 | 3 | » | Last | Show all

View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest


This thread is closed to new comments.

Continue Farking
Submit a Link »






Report