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(Salon)   The Counselor is the worst movie ever made. Yes, worse than Ishtar, Pretty Woman, Gravity, and Manos: The Hands of Fate   (salon.com ) divider line
    More: Obvious, Jean-Luc Godard, Lawrence Kasdan, humans, showgirls, Javier Bardem, Michael Fassbender, Cormac McCarthy, named stars  
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8471 clicks; posted to Entertainment » on 26 Oct 2013 at 8:26 PM (2 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



232 Comments   (+0 »)
   
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2013-10-26 06:29:42 PM  
This is more like having Alice Waters and Mario Batali labor in the kitchen for a while and then serve you a gray-green burger on Wonder Bread, with what looks like somebody's pubic hair stuck to it. But surrounded with whimsical garnishes of fresh herbs.

Pungently said.
 
2013-10-26 07:01:42 PM  
I've seen Meatballs 4. You, Counselor, are no Meatballs 4.
 
2013-10-26 07:20:04 PM  
Forgot one more:


images2.wikia.nocookie.net
 
2013-10-26 07:25:31 PM  
Worse than Schindler's List?

Worst. Comedy. Ever.
 
2013-10-26 07:30:36 PM  
I just bought "Hollow Man 2", because I consider the original one of the worst films in existence, in a laugh out loud sense of bad. "Duct tape! It fixes everything." I have hopes that the sequel will be even worse, it that's possible.
 
2013-10-26 07:43:37 PM  
No one saw Jaws 4?
 
2013-10-26 07:44:04 PM  

NewportBarGuy: Worse than Schindler's List?

Worst. Comedy. Ever.


really? i thought it was a gas!

/aisle seat, please.
 
2013-10-26 07:44:20 PM  

simplicimus: I just bought "Hollow Man 2", because I consider the original one of the worst films in existence, in a laugh out loud sense of bad. "Duct tape! It fixes everything." I have hopes that the sequel will be even worse, it that's possible.


I got kicked out of Hollow Man for snickering so loudly during the scary scenes.
 
2013-10-26 08:05:15 PM  

God Is My Co-Pirate: simplicimus: I just bought "Hollow Man 2", because I consider the original one of the worst films in existence, in a laugh out loud sense of bad. "Duct tape! It fixes everything." I have hopes that the sequel will be even worse, it that's possible.

I got kicked out of Hollow Man for snickering so loudly during the scary scenes.


I was there with some co-workers, and we MST3K'd the hell out of it.
 
2013-10-26 08:11:13 PM  
Highlander 2
Cloverfield
 
2013-10-26 08:16:28 PM  
Sorry. Not worse than Gigli.
 
2013-10-26 08:23:49 PM  

enry: Highlander 2
Cloverfield


Penalty points assessed for violation of Fark meme, there were no sequels to Highlander.
 
2013-10-26 08:24:25 PM  
It's a good thing that there was only one Highlander movie, because a sequel would have been worse than The Counselor,
 
2013-10-26 08:28:42 PM  
And yet, it's only 36% on RT with 121 reviews.
 
2013-10-26 08:30:03 PM  

B.L.Z. Bub: And yet, it's only 36% on RT with 121 reviews.


FTFM
 
2013-10-26 08:30:29 PM  
The Room would like to have a word with you, subby.
 
2013-10-26 08:30:55 PM  
Couldn't have been worse than JJ Star Trek.
 
2013-10-26 08:31:46 PM  

simplicimus: I just bought "Hollow Man 2", because I consider the original one of the worst films in existence, in a laugh out loud sense of bad. "Duct tape! It fixes everything." I have hopes that the sequel will be even worse, it that's possible.


I loved Hollow Man for the same reason, though I thought they might have mistaken "invisible" for "invincible."
 
2013-10-26 08:32:29 PM  
Space Mutiny!!!!

archive.sci-fi-london.com
 
2013-10-26 08:33:06 PM  
worse than Clambake?
 
2013-10-26 08:35:02 PM  
I liked Gravity.
 
2013-10-26 08:36:55 PM  
IIRC Salon.com did not like The Avengers so I will go elsewhere for movie reviews.
 
2013-10-26 08:39:23 PM  
Jeanne Dielman, 23 quai du Commerce, 1080 Bruxellesis the only real choice for worst film ever.

Behold:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YSa4z6OioeY
 
2013-10-26 08:39:46 PM  
There's no way it can be as bad as Gravity.
 
2013-10-26 08:39:46 PM  
Javier Bardem is overrated. There, I said it.
 
2013-10-26 08:40:15 PM  

Gergesa: Space Mutiny!!!!

[archive.sci-fi-london.com image 340x264]


It was a great movie!  It starred Santa and Sting. And who can forget Calgon, one of the greatest screen villains of all-time.
 
2013-10-26 08:46:36 PM  

NeoCortex42: Gergesa: Space Mutiny!!!!

[archive.sci-fi-london.com image 340x264]

It was a great movie!  It starred Santa and Sting. And who can forget Calgon, one of the greatest screen villains of all-time.


31.media.tumblr.com

31.media.tumblr.com
 
2013-10-26 08:46:47 PM  
Worse than Titanic, Beverly Hills Cops 3 or Gangs of New York?
 
2013-10-26 08:47:06 PM  
No, the worst movie ever was Manhunter.
 
2013-10-26 08:47:30 PM  
 
2013-10-26 08:47:56 PM  
I'm still pondering the whole having sex with a Ferrari thing.

At least it was just a California and not a Ferrari worth a damn.
 
2013-10-26 08:49:46 PM  

AliceBToklasLives: Jeanne Dielman, 23 quai du Commerce, 1080 Bruxellesis the only real choice for worst film ever.

Behold:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YSa4z6OioeY


Something actually has to happen for something to be the worst ever. That's just a painting on film.
 
2013-10-26 08:52:59 PM  
Just saw it today...I'd give it a 5.5 or 6.I live with my mom.

Fassbender was good, Bardem and Pitt were more than adequate as their entertaining, but perhaps over-the-top characters, but casting Cruz and Diaz.  Ech.
 
2013-10-26 08:57:41 PM  
FTA: Oh, and there's a scene where a woman has sex with a car. We'll get to that.

Okay... is there a missing second page to this article?
 
2013-10-26 08:57:46 PM  

Gergesa: Space Mutiny!!!!

[archive.sci-fi-london.com image 340x264]


Rock Hardslab!
 
2013-10-26 08:58:37 PM  
Ohhhhh, I missed the memo that we're all supposed to hate Gravity right now.
 
2013-10-26 09:01:59 PM  
So, this isn't another Friday the 13th movie?
 
2013-10-26 09:02:36 PM  
Xanadu demands a re-count!!
 
2013-10-26 09:05:32 PM  

Ebenator: Ohhhhh, I missed the memo that we're all supposed to hate Gravity right now.


You do have the option of forming your own opinion...
 
2013-10-26 09:06:18 PM  
Everything I've read so far about The Counselor suggests that it will be a flop at the box office, but that it will go on to become a cult classic. It seems like the sort of movie that requires repeated viewings to figure it out.
 
2013-10-26 09:07:21 PM  

Galileo's Daughter: Gergesa: Space Mutiny!!!!

[archive.sci-fi-london.com image 340x264]

Rock Hardslab!


Lump BeefBroth!
 
2013-10-26 09:09:35 PM  

Ebenator: Ohhhhh, I missed the memo that we're all supposed to hate Gravity right now.


Yep. And the same Farkers decreed that John Carter failed intentionally because Disney wanted a sinkhole for tax write-offs.
 
2013-10-26 09:12:17 PM  

Spadababababababa Spadina Bus: Everything I've read so far about The Counselor suggests that it will be a flop at the box office, but that it will go on to become a cult classic. It seems like the sort of movie that requires repeated viewings to figure it out.


If you want to dedicate 8 to 10 hours to a film. No thanks.
 
2013-10-26 09:14:29 PM  
Headline fails without Caddyshack 2.
 
2013-10-26 09:16:37 PM  
Innocent children, with your 'The Room's and your 'Space Mutiny's. There are upper divisions of the competition for the worst movie ever made, and your choices don't qualify.

images.moviepostershop.com

Endure this and become enlightened.
 
2013-10-26 09:17:35 PM  
Number one, do NOT defile  Manos that way.

Number two, I will agree that we need to stop pretending Javier Bardem is an acting sage just because he had one good movie.

Number three....it's times like this I stare at the page and wish that color I only used for  Drew and  TMLO was on it.  I miss  TMLO.
 
2013-10-26 09:20:10 PM  

Darth Macho: Innocent children, with your 'The Room's and your 'Space Mutiny's. There are upper divisions of the competition for the worst movie ever made, and your choices don't qualify.

[images.moviepostershop.com image 520x812]

Endure this and become enlightened.


This is the first I have ever heard of that movie. Not sure how's I've missed it.

FriarReb98: Number one, do NOT defile  Manos that way.

Number two, I will agree that we need to stop pretending Javier Bardem is an acting sage just because he had one good movie.

Number three....it's times like this I stare at the page and wish that color I only used for  Drew and  TMLO was on it.  I miss  TMLO.


Is he not around anymore?  Now that you mention it, I don't think I've seen him in threads in a while.
 
2013-10-26 09:21:32 PM  

ilarge.listal.com

 
2013-10-26 09:22:41 PM  
Problem Child 2.

/done
 
2013-10-26 09:27:46 PM  
Galaxina. Seriously just really, really, really, bad.
 
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