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(Dallas Observer)   The top Republican candidate for Texas governor asks his Facebook followers for advice on how to make Texas better. Derpilarity ensues   (blogs.dallasobserver.com) divider line 291
    More: Dumbass, Texas, Republican, Facebook, Texas Governor, pledge allegiance, United States National Forest, Try Harder, American way of life  
•       •       •

7952 clicks; posted to Politics » on 25 Oct 2013 at 4:42 PM (25 weeks ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



291 Comments   (+0 »)
   
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2013-10-25 03:08:57 PM
Most or all of the suggestions came from Abbott supporters, and most were divisive. It was refreshing, then, to see a significant minority expressing a nonpartisan hope that Texas will have a bright future:

Wallercounty Redreck Truckclub: "Succeed!!!"

Josh Keal: Succeed now!

John Harris: "Succeed!"

Sue Weaver-Spencer: "Succeed!"

Curtis Ballew: "succeed from the union"


This is amazing.
 
2013-10-25 03:13:08 PM
Wow, I love Texas--but these people make me ashamed to call it home. Illiterate, hateful, ignorant, and intolerant. That is so sad.

But--the lady from Cypress who thinks drones are watching her--now that is funny!!
 
2013-10-25 03:18:47 PM
FOX News and Rush Limbaugh have had a big effect on these people.
 
2013-10-25 03:21:06 PM
Wow.  This was on Facespace?

That kinda pokes a few holes in the theory that people are stupid trolls on the internet because of anonymity.  Maybe most people are just stupid trolls?
 
2013-10-25 03:23:24 PM

The RIchest Man in Babylon: Maybe most people are just stupid trolls?

 
2013-10-25 03:32:20 PM

markie_farkie: The RIchest Man in Babylon: Maybe most people are just stupid trolls?


Correction accepted.
 
2013-10-25 03:43:09 PM
The obvious answer is, "Kick Abbott's followers out of Texas."
 
2013-10-25 03:56:21 PM
The RIchest Man in Babylon:That kinda pokes a few holes in the theory that people are stupid trolls on the internet because of anonymity.  Maybe most people are just stupid trolls?

They are all egotistical enough to think their opinion matters - they want people to know they said it. It does little to reduce the daily idiots, but it is good for blocking the obsessive trolls that keep coming back.
 
2013-10-25 04:07:06 PM
Jamie Fuller: "Stop micro managing the mobile home Bueness"

That's not a typo.  In border towns, that's spanglish for "goodness".
 
2013-10-25 04:08:41 PM
"Stop micro managing the mobile home Bueness"
 
2013-10-25 04:45:00 PM
Succeed!!

Hilarious
 
2013-10-25 04:45:35 PM
The gene pool in Texas could use a healthy dose of chlorine.
 
2013-10-25 04:46:38 PM
FTA: 'Mike McLain: "How about making people pass an iq test before they can move here from another state, and especially before they can vote."'

lol
 
2013-10-25 04:46:43 PM

what_now: Most or all of the suggestions came from Abbott supporters, and most were divisive. It was refreshing, then, to see a significant minority expressing a nonpartisan hope that Texas will have a bright future:

Wallercounty Redreck Truckclub: "Succeed!!!"

Josh Keal: Succeed now!

John Harris: "Succeed!"

Sue Weaver-Spencer: "Succeed!"

Curtis Ballew: "succeed from the union"

This is amazing.


What do you have against people that want to succeed?
 
2013-10-25 04:46:56 PM
God, every single comment is hilarious. Succeed!
 
2013-10-25 04:46:58 PM
These people reek of fear.
 
2013-10-25 04:47:09 PM
Are they trying to spell suck seed?
 
2013-10-25 04:47:10 PM
Curtis Ballew: "succeed from the union"

I like this thought. Its a great message that we are all in this together and it acknowledges the federal role in a brighter future.
 
2013-10-25 04:47:39 PM

PsyLord: what_now: Most or all of the suggestions came from Abbott supporters, and most were divisive. It was refreshing, then, to see a significant minority expressing a nonpartisan hope that Texas will have a bright future:

Wallercounty Redreck Truckclub: "Succeed!!!"

Josh Keal: Succeed now!

John Harris: "Succeed!"

Sue Weaver-Spencer: "Succeed!"

Curtis Ballew: "succeed from the union"

This is amazing.

What do you have against people that want to succeed?


I think we all know these people will never succeed.
 
2013-10-25 04:48:05 PM
DO IT
 
2013-10-25 04:48:11 PM
Oh dear God. How can anyone defend these people.
 
2013-10-25 04:48:15 PM
Man, I wish they would succeed.

Wait. That doesn't sound right.
 
2013-10-25 04:48:23 PM
David Adcock: "Secession! That is the ONLY solution to the Wimpublican-And-Obammunist Slavery that the National RATS and Moronic-Wimpublicans can HARDLY WAIT to impose upon our children and grandchildren and great-grandchildren - and etc., etc., etc., ... JUST STOP IT! (Doesn't ANYONE in gummint EVER read The Constitution any longer? [Even when these DungHeaps "pledge allegiance" to it?] Or are they Too STUPID to understand it any longer?)"

This guy is reminding me of my favorite schizoid nutball rambler, Francis E. Dec.
 
2013-10-25 04:50:42 PM

theorellior: David Adcock: "Secession! That is the ONLY solution to the Wimpublican-And-Obammunist Slavery that the National RATS and Moronic-Wimpublicans can HARDLY WAIT to impose upon our children and grandchildren and great-grandchildren - and etc., etc., etc., ... JUST STOP IT! (Doesn't ANYONE in gummint EVER read The Constitution any longer? [Even when these DungHeaps "pledge allegiance" to it?] Or are they Too STUPID to understand it any longer?)"

This guy is reminding me of my favorite schizoid nutball rambler, Francis E. Dec.


Wimpublicans, eh? Not bad. Also, "gummint".

At least he spelled "secession" correctly.
 
2013-10-25 04:50:47 PM

miss diminutive: These people reek of fear.


upload.wikimedia.org

"<Sniff> Fear! The state is rank with it!
 
2013-10-25 04:50:57 PM

theorellior: David Adcock: "Secession! That is the ONLY solution to the Wimpublican-And-Obammunist Slavery that the National RATS and Moronic-Wimpublicans can HARDLY WAIT to impose upon our children and grandchildren and great-grandchildren - and etc., etc., etc., ... JUST STOP IT! (Doesn't ANYONE in gummint EVER read The Constitution any longer? [Even when these DungHeaps "pledge allegiance" to it?] Or are they Too STUPID to understand it any longer?)"

This guy is reminding me of my favorite schizoid nutball rambler, Francis E. Dec.


I wonder how long it took him to type that with one hand?
 
2013-10-25 04:51:29 PM
Hilarious - but I do love the fact that not a single one of them had their hand out.
 
2013-10-25 04:51:53 PM

Krymson Tyde: FTA: 'Mike McLain: "How about making people pass an iq test before they can move here from another state, and especially before they can vote."'

lol


I wonder how low it has to be for them to allow people in.
 
2013-10-25 04:52:13 PM

cchris_39: Hilarious - but I do love the fact that not a single one of them had their hand out.


Yes, yes. Whatever you say.
 
2013-10-25 04:52:41 PM
Wow. Its like Free Republic, but with more racism and worse grammar.
 
2013-10-25 04:53:36 PM

vernonFL: Wow. Its like Free Republic, but with more racism and worse grammar.


How is that possible?
 
2013-10-25 04:54:19 PM
Though in all seriousness, if Texas does manage to succeed in seceding, they're going to have a massive problem with the cartels in a very short amount of time.
 
2013-10-25 04:54:58 PM

hardinparamedic: Oh dear God. How can anyone defend these people.


Because unlike libs, they could "pass" an IQ test.
 
2013-10-25 04:55:01 PM

cchris_39: Hilarious - but I do love the fact that not a single one of them had their hand out.


Right because the California Governor's facebook page is all "gimme welfare!!  And food stamps.  I wanna a new Obamaphone!  Pay my rent!!"
 
2013-10-25 04:55:18 PM
A virtual tsunami of derp.  But laugh all you want, Greg Abbot will be the next gov of Texas and there is almost nothing that can be done to stop it.  Only an act of God or Horror could prevent it at this point.

Thankfully I think that the odds of Greg ordering the Texas National Guard to close all the borders or begin a massive expulsion/execution of any group of people to be very very low.  An even lower chance of that than of him losing to be honest.
 
2013-10-25 04:55:33 PM
Don Embrey: "Find a way to remove Federal "Ownership" or Oversight from all the National Forests, Parks, etc, Federal buildings, and ANYTHING controlled by the Federal Government. They are PURE EVIL and nobody i know wants them and their tyrannic behavior inside the boundaries of the State of Texas. There is, in the fine print, rules that give the States rights over federal "property" when the feds shut down and can't do their jobs. Ill be DAMNED if they try to keep me out of any land owned by THE PEOPLE. Washington is a government AGAINST THE PEOPLE. We are STUPID not to draw ANOTHER line in the sand bigger than the Alamo, and Guard it like never before. Obama is PURE EVIL. He should not even be allowed in our State. If i can help, you just let me know."

What he said. I guess.
 
2013-10-25 04:56:27 PM
What's funny is that this is the true voice of the GOP base. Abbot has to run against a real nutter like Larry Kilgore, and I am sure they will be more nutcases out to "Primary" him.

The fact is, Wendy Davis has a real shot of winning only because the guy she runs against will most likely be certifiably insane.
 
2013-10-25 04:56:38 PM
I love how Republicans call themselves "patriots" but seem to hate everything about the USA.
 
2013-10-25 04:57:06 PM

theorellior: vernonFL: Wow. Its like Free Republic, but with more racism and worse grammar.

How is that possible?


It's not more racism.  You have to unambiguously advocated genocide of non-muslims to break the racism rules on freep.  The grammar is worse because large internet communities tend to reinforce good grammar.  Facebook is toxic, in that regards, in that people only hear to who they choose to.
 
2013-10-25 04:57:20 PM
Mike McLain: "How about making people pass an iq test before they can move here from another state, and especially before they can vote."

I lol'd...
 
2013-10-25 04:57:55 PM

cchris_39: Hilarious - but I do love the fact that not a single one of them had their hand out.


25.media.tumblr.com
 
2013-10-25 04:58:14 PM

Vacation Bible School: Don Embrey: "Find a way to remove Federal "Ownership" or Oversight from all the National Forests, Parks, etc, Federal buildings, and ANYTHING controlled by the Federal Government. They are PURE EVIL and nobody i know wants them and their tyrannic behavior inside the boundaries of the State of Texas. There is, in the fine print, rules that give the States rights over federal "property" when the feds shut down and can't do their jobs. Ill be DAMNED if they try to keep me out of any land owned by THE PEOPLE. Washington is a government AGAINST THE PEOPLE. We are STUPID not to draw ANOTHER line in the sand bigger than the Alamo, and Guard it like never before. Obama is PURE EVIL. He should not even be allowed in our State. If i can help, you just let me know."

What he said. I guess.


"Tyranny" is have park rangers who make sure people aren't harming the lands and are being safe I guess.
 
2013-10-25 04:58:46 PM
img389.imageshack.us
 
2013-10-25 04:59:01 PM
Barry Baudion seems reasonable.  Bet he's one of them "loberals"
 
2013-10-25 04:59:26 PM

FTA....

As his bid to become Texas' next governor ramps up

s3.amazonaws.com

images.wikia.com


Hate to tell ya, Mr. Abbott, the Governor's Mansion is totally not handicap accessible.
Fer reals. There's like one measly ramp as a wink to ADA.
 
2013-10-25 05:00:07 PM

Vacation Bible School: Don Embrey: "Find a way to remove Federal "Ownership" or Oversight from all the National Forests, Parks, etc, Federal buildings, and ANYTHING controlled by the Federal Government. They are PURE EVIL and nobody i know wants them and their tyrannic behavior inside the boundaries of the State of Texas. There is, in the fine print, rules that give the States rights over federal "property" when the feds shut down and can't do their jobs. Ill be DAMNED if they try to keep me out of any land owned by THE PEOPLE. Washington is a government AGAINST THE PEOPLE. We are STUPID not to draw ANOTHER line in the sand bigger than the Alamo, and Guard it like never before. Obama is PURE EVIL. He should not even be allowed in our State. If i can help, you just let me know."

What he said. I guess.


What the hell did he say?
 
2013-10-25 05:00:16 PM

Krymson Tyde: FTA: 'Mike McLain: "How about making people pass an iq test before they can move here from another state, and especially before they can vote."'

lol


It reminded me of this:

Lister: I went to art college.
Rimmer: You.
Lister: Yeah.
Rimmer: How did you get into art college?
Lister: The normal way you get into art college. The same old usual, boring, normal way you get in. Failed my exams and applied. They snapped me up.
 
2013-10-25 05:00:17 PM

ikanreed: theorellior: vernonFL: Wow. Its like Free Republic, but with more racism and worse grammar.

How is that possible?

It's not more racism.  You have to unambiguously advocated genocide of non-muslims to break the racism rules on freep.


... Or suggest that white Americans have an advantage. I believe that's also a banning offence.
 
2013-10-25 05:01:27 PM
JUST STOP IT! (Doesn't ANYONE in gummint EVER read The Constitution any longer? [Even when these DungHeaps "pledge allegiance" to it?] Or are they Too STUPID to understand it any longer?)"
 
2013-10-25 05:01:29 PM
The Observer has some of the best reporting in DFW, and the writers aren't afraid to put trolls in their place. Am quite fond of it.
 
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