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(Mother Nature Network)   Despite what environmentalists have been telling us over the decades, it turns out lots of animal species love to eat ocean plastics   (mnn.com) divider line 45
    More: Cool, marine debris, species, environmentalists  
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7171 clicks; posted to Main » on 24 Oct 2013 at 9:40 AM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



45 Comments   (+0 »)
   
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest

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2013-10-24 09:35:23 AM  
Yeah subby, real cool.
 
2013-10-24 09:41:11 AM  
Another lie from the Koch brothers.
 
2013-10-24 09:41:36 AM  
What's it mean if he always walks a respectful distance behind her, but only to check out her ass?
 
2013-10-24 09:42:40 AM  
Clearly I mixed up my threads. Although I think the above post applies to most any situation.
 
2013-10-24 09:43:38 AM  
I love eating deep fried things, that doesn't mean it's healthy to do so.
 
ZAZ [TotalFark]
2013-10-24 09:43:49 AM  
Let me know when an animal loves to digest plastic. That's what we need. We have oil-eating bacteria. Have Monsanto hack up a plastic-eating bacterium. (Yes, I know bacteria are not animals. I also remember the fictional polyethylene eating bacterium from Larry Niven's SF novels, but we could use less ultraprocessed food on supermarket shelves.)
 
2013-10-24 09:44:22 AM  
I would eat the plastics too...

web-images.chacha.com
 
2013-10-24 09:45:06 AM  
My dog loves to eat plastic, specifically water bottles. Judging from what comes out the other end she isn't digesting any of it.
 
2013-10-24 09:46:44 AM  
God, the stupid contained in that headline makes my teeth itch.

In short, lots of species are 'eating' the plastic, but none of them are 'digesting' it.  It's just getting turned into a bunch of much smaller pieces that may well be harder to clean up than the huge pieces that the animals are consuming.
 
2013-10-24 09:49:22 AM  
I seem to remember a cartoon subtitled something like "A dog's internal monologue."

"Can I eat that? Can I eat that? Can I eat that? Can I eat that? Can I eat that? Can I eat that?"

GIS fails me. Curses.
 
2013-10-24 09:49:36 AM  
ingested and eating are not necessarily the same thing subby.

What we need to do is bio-engineer a bacterium that eats all petroleum products, and then we can start our new societies ala The Uglies.
 
2013-10-24 09:50:47 AM  
This isn't cool subby.

It's no different than any animal eating random objects, it doesn't mean that the object is good or safe to eat.

The environment is so littered with trash that the creatures are eating it, maybe hoping it's food, or are desperate, or they're just dumb animals eating stuff cause it's there.

And as TFA says, the experts are currently unsure what the long term effects of this will be. My guess is it won't be all rosy happy, since waste & pollution doesn't normally have positive effects.

Either way, not cool. Step and claim your boot to the head subby.
 
2013-10-24 09:51:12 AM  
... I am really, really hoping you are being satirical, subby. Just 'cause something *can* eat a thing doesn't mean it's good for it.

I'm sure you'd love the taste of cyanide-Almonds!-But that doesn't mean it's GOOD for you.
 
2013-10-24 09:54:39 AM  
Stubby fails at reading. Saddest part is that I'm sure we're now going to start hearing Derpers repeat this bullshiat that ocean animals are eating the plastic so it doesn't matter if we dump more.
 
2013-10-24 09:55:22 AM  
+1 subby. You're getting the desired results with your headline. I see what you did there. ;)
 
2013-10-24 09:56:39 AM  

ZAZ: Let me know when an animal loves to digest plastic. That's what we need. We have oil-eating bacteria. Have Monsanto hack up a plastic-eating bacterium. (Yes, I know bacteria are not animals. I also remember the fictional polyethylene eating bacterium from Larry Niven's SF novels, but we could use less ultraprocessed food on supermarket shelves.)


Congrats, you've just made plastics useless in the long-term as the bacteria spread around the globe.
 
2013-10-24 09:57:05 AM  

Carn: ingested and eating are not necessarily the same thing subby.

What we need to do is bio-engineer a bacterium that eats all petroleum products, and then we can start our new societies ala The Uglies.


I look forward to seeing the aforementioned bacterium.  I'm especially curious as to how we'll help the bacterium tell the difference between garbage and 'omfg all my stuff is getting eaten by algae'.
 
2013-10-24 09:58:19 AM  
Yeah, this is really cool! Like how sea turtles eat plastic bags, thinking they are jellyfish! See, we can pollute as much as we want because all these animals that are ingesting plastic surely are digesting it and not just accumulating it in their digestive tracts.
 
2013-10-24 10:03:48 AM  

Infernalist: Carn: ingested and eating are not necessarily the same thing subby.

What we need to do is bio-engineer a bacterium that eats all petroleum products, and then we can start our new societies ala The Uglies.

I look forward to seeing the aforementioned bacterium.  I'm especially curious as to how we'll help the bacterium tell the difference between garbage and 'omfg all my stuff is getting eaten by algae'.


Well the latter is exactly what happened in the book :)
 
2013-10-24 10:06:29 AM  

Wellon Dowd: My dog loves to eat plastic, specifically water bottles. Judging from what comes out the other end she isn't digesting any of it.


I saw a stand-up comedian on John Oliver's comedy show do a joke about pulling a plastic bag out of his dog while walking the dog. Gist of the joke:  worst street magician evar!

The trouble with plastic is that not only that nothing much eats it (yet) but that it tends to break into smaller and smaller pieces as it degrades. This means it start off filling the bellies of sharks and albatross and ends up in pieces so tiny that they are engulfed by microbes. It is the most pervasive and one of the most durable pollutants.

Solution: don't buy a lot of plastic bags and geegaws. Get a steel bowl instead of a plastic bowl. It'll still be around in 100 years, but it won't hurt anything.

Plastic bags not only get swallowed by dogs but also by sea turtles, which mistake them for jellyfish. Sea trutles can eat jellyfish because their metabolisms are slow, but there's not much nutrition in a jellyfish and even less in a plastic bag.

That alone is a first rate reason to remember to carry a shopping bag or to buy those maize-based bags that disintegrate, leaving your plastic bag drawers full of small but harmless confetti.

Thanks to plastic, the anthropocene is a real thing and when aliens land on Earth in ages to come, they will know we have been here.

The pyramids will have returned to the ocean sediment from which they came, our steel will have rusted into ferrous or ferric oxide, but the plastic will endure.

The same thing happened long ago when the Earth was young. There was, for many millions of years, nothing which ate lignin, the woody material in woody plants. All or almost all of the world's coal was laid down during this carboniferous period before a fungus evolved that could process lignin. It is still one of the slowest plant materials to be broken down, but it no longer forms coal seams as much as it used to, partly because we are harvesting wood and peat before it forms ligninite let alone coal.

The lignin molecule looks like a subway map. Worth a quick peak.
 
2013-10-24 10:08:45 AM  
Well I can eat pussy all day long, doesn't mean I can survive on it.
 
2013-10-24 10:10:16 AM  
Umm, Subby, It probably is a good idea for all of us to try and keep as much plastic as possible out of the ocean.. Just sayin...
 
2013-10-24 10:19:23 AM  
There's a world of difference between eating and digesting. If Subby needs a real world demonstration he might try eating his pocketchange.
 
2013-10-24 10:24:05 AM  
i.imgur.com

Good job subby
 
2013-10-24 10:25:06 AM  

dv-ous: I seem to remember a cartoon subtitled something like "A dog's internal monologue."

"Can I eat that? Can I eat that? Can I eat that? Can I eat that? Can I eat that? Can I eat that?"

GIS fails me. Curses.


That's me in a room full of women.
 
2013-10-24 10:31:10 AM  
 
2013-10-24 10:43:55 AM  
Now if only we could get these living organisms to voluntarily enter a seaworthy recycling bin we could do something positive.
 
2013-10-24 10:54:52 AM  
This article brought to you by the American Plastic Association.
 
2013-10-24 10:56:07 AM  
This is what happens when animals eat plastic.

thejunkwave.com

They die.
 
2013-10-24 11:33:06 AM  

ZAZ: Let me know when an animal loves to digest plastic. That's what we need. We have oil-eating bacteria. Have Monsanto hack up a plastic-eating bacterium.


I foresee some trouble with that approach.

May I interest you in a good read?

www.audioeditions.com
 
2013-10-24 11:47:24 AM  

Deucednuisance: ZAZ: Let me know when an animal loves to digest plastic. That's what we need. We have oil-eating bacteria. Have Monsanto hack up a plastic-eating bacterium.

I foresee some trouble with that approach.

May I interest you in a good read?

[www.audioeditions.com image 250x250]


I can't read that!  It's an audiobook!!

/love me some audio books.  just silly this morning.
 
2013-10-24 11:48:34 AM  

brantgoose: lignin molecule


Cool, thanks for the subway map
 
2013-10-24 11:48:55 AM  

rewind2846: This is what happens when animals eat plastic.

[thejunkwave.com image 500x351]

They die.


I was gonna post that but I didn't want to have my posting privileges revoked again.
 
kgf
2013-10-24 12:28:35 PM  
Let's check on subby's other submitted article:  "Hey cool!!  Inner-city toddlers can eat lead-based paint!"
 
2013-10-24 12:49:56 PM  
Despite what ________ have been telling us over the decades, it turns out ______ love to eat _______

Despite what doctors have been telling us over the decades, it turns out children love to eat lead paint

Despite what veterinarians have been telling us over the decades, it turns out pets love to eat antifreeze

Despite what nutritionists have been telling us over the decades, it turns out Iowans love to eat deep fried pork butts rolled in sugar and encased in a salt cocoon
 
2013-10-24 01:22:53 PM  
Despite all their fervent protests... Subby LOVES to eat cocks in interstate rest stop bathrooms.

Seriously. It would be great if there were organisms that could digest anything more complex than cellulose. I was fooled enough to come in the thread hoping to hear about one. But one of the major selling points of plastics, one of the things we LIKE about them is that they are complex hydrocarbons that are difficult to unwind. This sounds more like the reason you tell kids to never swallow their bubblegum.


Mr McGuire has one word for you.
 
2013-10-24 01:49:42 PM  
It makes the left side of my face all tingly!
 
2013-10-24 02:26:13 PM  
There is nothing that can be done since animals don't understand our words
 
2013-10-24 02:58:13 PM  
There was a science fiction short written back in the 1970's when the Northeastern US looked like Eastern China, brown cloud, flaming rivers stuff like that.

Unfortunately I don't remember who wrote the story. Two come to mind, Piers Anthony or James Blish. But basically there was a very lively "Screwtape Letters" sort of back and forth between some microbial race and their boss back at Central Central. And being microbes, they figured out the best way to help their host was to convert polyethelene plastic into booze.

Anyone who knows the story, I'd be glad to hear from you. But one of the lines that stuck with me was how their host was proud that plastic bottles bobbing in the sea was a sign of how man had conquered.
 
2013-10-24 04:01:05 PM  
The North Pacific gyre ...

Does it gimble in the wabe with all the mome raths outgrabe?
 
2013-10-24 04:53:11 PM  

skozlaw: Despite what ________ have been telling us over the decades, it turns out ______ love to eat _______

Despite what doctors have been telling us over the decades, it turns out children love to eat lead paint

Despite what veterinarians have been telling us over the decades, it turns out pets love to eat antifreeze

Despite what nutritionists have been telling us over the decades, it turns out Iowans love to eat deep fried pork butts rolled in sugar and encased in a salt cocoon


EPIC!
 
2013-10-24 05:11:10 PM  
In the far future, all of the beaches of the Earth will be composed of tiny particles of broken glass.
 
2013-10-24 08:32:45 PM  

Loadmaster: In the far future, all of the beaches of the Earth will be composed of tiny particles of broken glass.


They already are.
 
2013-10-24 08:35:11 PM  
www.souvenirpress.co.uk
 
2013-10-25 01:24:35 AM  
Did Subby even fugging read the damned article? Not cool.
 
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