If you can read this, either the style sheet didn't load or you have an older browser that doesn't support style sheets. Try clearing your browser cache and refreshing the page.

(Slate)   It's perfectly okay to end a relationship by sending an email. IDK I'M F*CKING YOUR BFF JILL LOL   (slate.com) divider line 113
    More: PSA, IDK, Jill Balcon, interpersonal relationship, Double X  
•       •       •

8938 clicks; posted to Main » on 23 Oct 2013 at 11:28 PM (25 weeks ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



113 Comments   (+0 »)
   
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest

First | « | 1 | 2 | 3 | » | Last | Show all
 
2013-10-23 08:27:26 PM
SLAP!
 
2013-10-23 08:49:08 PM
Another blow to the communication, etiquette, and coping skills of our youth.

/pathetic
 
2013-10-23 08:50:37 PM
Counterpoint: Yes, it is a dick move if you've been together long enought to call it a 'relationship' and if you ever see each other in person.
 
2013-10-23 09:00:02 PM

Ashyukun: Counterpoint: Yes, it is a dick move if you've been together long enought to call it a 'relationship' and if you ever see each other in person.


Precisely.  I imagine it's OK to break up via skywriter, too.  That doesn't mean it's not a dick move.
 
2013-10-23 09:15:32 PM
The only real way to break up with someone is to give me $590.37 and wait for the mainpage thread.
 
2013-10-23 09:23:32 PM
Both Britney Spears and Russell Brand have initiated divorces via text message.

Are you suggesting that THAT is a good reason to make it acceptable!?

Britney Spears and Russell Brand are your yardstick!?
 
2013-10-23 09:39:57 PM
If Liz is reading this, I've been cheating on you for like 4 months.
 
2013-10-23 09:53:36 PM

Bareefer Obonghit: If Liz is reading this, I've been cheating on you for like 4 months.


That's OK, I've been cheating on your for 5.
 
2013-10-23 10:02:10 PM
I prefer to break up via Magic Eye.

en.sasibak.com
 
2013-10-23 10:09:37 PM

miss diminutive: I prefer to break up via Magic Eye.

[en.sasibak.com image 850x471]


I have no idea what's in that one but I'm lolling because I can see your SO so pleased you got them one and earnestly staring into it and finally the image comes clear and...BOOM BIATCH!!

Les crestfallen.
 
2013-10-23 10:11:07 PM

miss diminutive: I prefer to break up via Magic Eye.

[en.sasibak.com image 850x471]


Is that a schooner?
 
2013-10-23 10:13:47 PM

miss diminutive: I prefer to break up via Magic Eye.

[en.sasibak.com image 850x471]


I can see the image fine, but can't tell what it says.  Three letters right in the center? First one is an N or H?
 
2013-10-23 10:23:08 PM

Podmore: miss diminutive: I prefer to break up via Magic Eye.

[en.sasibak.com image 850x471]

I can see the image fine, but can't tell what it says.  Three letters right in the center? First one is an N or H?


It's an H. I was limited to three characters, so I had to make them count.

Barfmaker: I have no idea what's in that one but I'm lolling because I can see your SO so pleased you got them one and earnestly staring into it and finally the image comes clear and...BOOM BIATCH!!


And while they're straining their eyes trying to decipher it, I leave with all my shiat. Foolproof.
 
2013-10-23 10:26:43 PM

miss diminutive: Podmore: miss diminutive: I prefer to break up via Magic Eye.

[en.sasibak.com image 850x471]

I can see the image fine, but can't tell what it says.  Three letters right in the center? First one is an N or H?

It's an H. I was limited to three characters, so I had to make them count.

Barfmaker: I have no idea what's in that one but I'm lolling because I can see your SO so pleased you got them one and earnestly staring into it and finally the image comes clear and...BOOM BIATCH!!

And while they're straining their eyes trying to decipher it, I leave with all my shiat. Foolproof.


Well I was gonna guess A2M. Oh well
 
2013-10-23 10:31:22 PM

Peter von Nostrand: Well I was gonna guess A2M. Oh well


It's BBC, but you were close.

/not really
 
2013-10-23 10:43:11 PM

miss diminutive: Peter von Nostrand: Well I was gonna guess A2M. Oh well

It's BBC, but you were close.

/not really


Dammit, I almost had it but my eyes crossed and now I have a migraine
 
2013-10-23 11:30:44 PM

DanZero: SLAP!


Done in one.

xspblog.com
 
2013-10-23 11:32:49 PM

Peter von Nostrand: miss diminutive: Podmore: miss diminutive: I prefer to break up via Magic Eye.

[en.sasibak.com image 850x471]

I can see the image fine, but can't tell what it says.  Three letters right in the center? First one is an N or H?

It's an H. I was limited to three characters, so I had to make them count.

Barfmaker: I have no idea what's in that one but I'm lolling because I can see your SO so pleased you got them one and earnestly staring into it and finally the image comes clear and...BOOM BIATCH!!

And while they're straining their eyes trying to decipher it, I leave with all my shiat. Foolproof.

Well I was gonna guess A2M. Oh well


Considering she's a lady...
 
2013-10-23 11:34:19 PM

basemetal: Another blow to the communication, etiquette, and coping skills of our youth.

/pathetic


75% of my gfs have dumped me over email.  2 on Christmas day (thankfully they kept their presents...), 1 on Thanksgiving... and people wonder why I refuse to do anything for the holidays.  And for the last one... thanks for mentioning something before I spent $900 on custom made earring for you.

/bitter
//drinks
 
2013-10-23 11:36:31 PM

Ashyukun: Counterpoint: Yes, it is a dick move if you've been together long enought to call it a 'relationship' and if you ever see each other in person.


That's not even a counterpoint, because the author of that crap had no real point. She actually starts with the narrative that something is OK to do, when anyone with a sense of decency knows immediately it is not OK and is in fact, very much a "dick move."

I hope after a 10 yr "relationship" her SO drops her a twitter telling her they're breaking up.  Then she can get back to me with whether or not she thinks that a tad bit impersonal, insulting and cold-hearted.
 
2013-10-23 11:36:46 PM
So the headline of the article is "Breakup email is not a dick move". FFS what the f*ck is wrong with these kids today? For the record, children, breaking up via e-mail, twitter, Facebook, text message or even via an answering machine is a horrible, reprehensible thing to do, something only the most cowardly and spineless of douchenozzles would even contemplate. If any of you disagree, you should slap the shiat out of your parents for raising you wrong.

/rant off
 
2013-10-23 11:37:14 PM

Ashelth: basemetal: Another blow to the communication, etiquette, and coping skills of our youth.

/pathetic

75% of my gfs have dumped me over email.  2 on Christmas day (thankfully they kept their presents...), 1 on Thanksgiving... and people wonder why I refuse to do anything for the holidays.  And for the last one... thanks for mentioning something before I spent $900 on custom made earring for you.

/bitter
//drinks


You're doing something really wrong. I suspect your hanging your sucker sign crooked.
 
2013-10-23 11:37:25 PM
I broke up with a girl via e-mail. It was a long distance relationship. I was told by pretty much everyone it was a bad thing. Oops oh well.
 
2013-10-23 11:38:01 PM

miss diminutive: I prefer to break up via Magic Eye.

[en.sasibak.com image 850x471]


GTH, i think. Can never do those things on screens, just paper.
 
2013-10-23 11:39:18 PM

Ashelth: basemetal: Another blow to the communication, etiquette, and coping skills of our youth.

/pathetic

75% of my gfs have dumped me over email.  2 on Christmas day (thankfully they kept their presents...), 1 on Thanksgiving... and people wonder why I refuse to do anything for the holidays.  And for the last one... thanks for mentioning something before I spent $900 on custom made earring for you.

/bitter
//drinks


Did they meet each other?
 
2013-10-23 11:42:35 PM

Lsherm: miss diminutive: I prefer to break up via Magic Eye.

[en.sasibak.com image 850x471]

Is that a schooner?



Ha ha ha ha. You dumb bastard. It's not a schooner... it's a Sailboat.
 
2013-10-23 11:43:02 PM

Lsherm: miss diminutive: I prefer to break up via Magic Eye.

[en.sasibak.com image 850x471]

Is that a schooner?


Hahahaha, you dumb bastard.  That's not a schooner, it's a sailboat.
 
2013-10-23 11:48:01 PM

LucklessWonder: miss diminutive: I prefer to break up via Magic Eye.

[en.sasibak.com image 850x471]

GTH, i think. Can never do those things on screens, just paper.


I think it's H8U.

/never broken up by e-mail or phone. Did break up via cop once.
 
2013-10-23 11:48:42 PM

basemetal: Another blow to the communication, etiquette, and coping skills of our youth elderly.


Don't worry, I'm getting old too.
 
2013-10-23 11:49:36 PM

miss diminutive: I prefer to break up via Magic Eye.

[en.sasibak.com image 850x471]


H8U

/whaaa?
//what did *I* ever do to you??
 
2013-10-23 11:49:51 PM
I wonder if the "BFF Jill" girl is hot yet.

/what? That commercial was  like 7 years ago
 
2013-10-23 11:51:54 PM

TheLopper: Lsherm: miss diminutive: I prefer to break up via Magic Eye.

[en.sasibak.com image 850x471]

Is that a schooner?


Ha ha ha ha. You dumb bastard. It's not a schooner... it's a Sailboat.


*shakes tiny fist of rage*

Missed it by that much.
 
2013-10-23 11:52:01 PM
I once received a "Dear John" birthday card.
 
2013-10-23 11:52:11 PM

bingo the psych-o: basemetal: Another blow to the communication, etiquette, and coping skills of our youth elderly.

Don't worry, I'm getting old too.


The elderly know how to communicate, they can even hold a conversation while looking at you and not be all awkward and needing their pacifier phone.
 
2013-10-23 11:52:52 PM

miss diminutive: Peter von Nostrand: Well I was gonna guess A2M. Oh well

It's BBC, but you were close.

/not really


that BC was so B it made me go cross-eyed

/now i have a headache
 
433 [TotalFark]
2013-10-23 11:53:31 PM
"The Breakup Email Is Not a Dick Move"

Oh, yes it is.  And it is also a b*tch move.

Electronic and unable to communicate is no way to go through life, son/daughter.
 
2013-10-23 11:58:42 PM

TheLopper: Lsherm: miss diminutive: I prefer to break up via Magic Eye.

[en.sasibak.com image 850x471]

Is that a schooner?


Ha ha ha ha. You dumb bastard. It's not a schooner... it's a Sailboat.


Neondistraction: Lsherm: miss diminutive: I prefer to break up via Magic Eye.

[en.sasibak.com image 850x471]

Is that a schooner?

Hahahaha, you dumb bastard.  That's not a schooner, it's a sailboat.


A schooner is a sailboat, stupidheads!
 
2013-10-23 11:59:48 PM

miss diminutive: I prefer to break up via Magic Eye.

[en.sasibak.com image 850x471]


farm8.staticflickr.com
 
2013-10-24 12:02:33 AM

Mugato: I wonder if the "BFF Jill" girl is hot yet.

/what? That commercial was  like 7 years ago


The BFF Jill is probably hotter. Girls named Jill are always hot.

/My first crush ever was named Jill.
//I never actually talked to her because 1. I was a coward and 2. Her dad would have shot me with a bow and arrow.
 
2013-10-24 12:03:17 AM
How is breaking up by text or email any different from a "Dear John" letter?Same impersonal stuff that's been going on forever. Didn't Henry VIII break up with his wives by beheading them?

miss diminutive: I prefer to break up via Magic Eye.

[en.sasibak.com image 850x471]


Wow, it's a schooner!
 
2013-10-24 12:04:34 AM
It's how you know that you were an idiot in the first place, to have been in the relationship with such a horrible person.
 
2013-10-24 12:06:03 AM
Hell, I was dumped by e-mail over a decade ago (July 2002).

I had a girlfriend in college, we'd been dating for around 2 years, but over the last few months she'd been getting more and more distant and refusing to talk to me.  She had graduated and I was still a year from graduation, and as soon as she had her degree in hand she started to pretty clearly phase me out.  I was too naive to see this, so I was trying to make things work.  Every time I asked to meet her someplace or go on a date, she would be busy, I'd gone from seeing her daily to seeing her at most maybe once every few weeks.  Most of the time when I would call, she'd not be home (this before cell phones were common).

One day I called her up, her father answered (she still lived at home with her parents, ostensibly to save money while she was in school).  I asked to speak with her.  Her father angrily shouted into the phone that she's not there, and to never call there again.

I was shocked, and confused.  A few hours later I got an e-mail dumping me.

It was basically saying that she's sorry, but it's just not working out and it's all my fault and she's been trying to fix things but I just wouldn't meet her halfway (to which I went "WTF?!".  She basically dumped on me for not being Christian (in the 2 years we'd dated, she'd never even hinted at being Christian, and had even indicated she dabbled with neopaganism, but now she was acting like a Christian fundamentalist and acting like she had been all along), she griped at me for even vaguely trying to hint at sex (she was vehemently a "wait until marriage" girl, and she wasn't in a hurry to get married either.  We had started to vaguely talk about marriage, but it was still something in the indefinite future for us), and had basically wrote a lengthy rant of how much I suck and will always suck.

I find out through mutual friends that within a year of that, she'd come out as a lesbian.  I didn't see her or talk to her for over a decade after that.   Last I saw her was last year, I ran across her in a store we were both shopping at.  She made a point of coming up to me and talking to me, she mentioned that her girlfriend and her were moving to Seattle and getting married. . . and she never apologized for what she said or did, instead making some vague statements about being sorry it could never work out between us.

I made a vague, noncommital nod and walked off, that epilogue to a couple of weird years of my life behind me.
 
2013-10-24 12:07:12 AM

miss diminutive: I prefer to break up via Magic Eye.

[en.sasibak.com image 850x471]


You are pure evil. Can I marry you?
 
2013-10-24 12:08:21 AM

TheLopper: Lsherm: miss diminutive: I prefer to break up via Magic Eye.

[en.sasibak.com image 850x471]

Is that a schooner?


Ha ha ha ha. You dumb bastard. It's not a schooner... it's a Sailboat.


Actually, it's neither.
spacebison.com
 
2013-10-24 12:13:00 AM
I got broken up with over WoW. I met her on WoW, so you know, full circle and what not.

/Never date WoW sluts
//Or lose your virginity to them
///They'll break up with you then fly out to California to fark another dude from the guild.
 
2013-10-24 12:15:04 AM
Weird. I can't get miss diminutive's image, but SpaceBison's I get without even trying.

Maybe it's the size of the image pattern?
 
2013-10-24 12:16:18 AM
 
2013-10-24 12:16:45 AM

SpaceBison: TheLopper: Lsherm: miss diminutive: I prefer to break up via Magic Eye.

[en.sasibak.com image 850x471]

Is that a schooner?


Ha ha ha ha. You dumb bastard. It's not a schooner... it's a Sailboat.

Actually, it's neither.
[spacebison.com image 850x460]


You should mark that NSFW asshole, enjoy bannination asshole!
 
2013-10-24 12:18:04 AM
There was a girl I was doing.Just this past June.She was a F*ck buddy.Although I knew she was not a F buddy.But we called it that.I knew what I was doing.I stuck my dick in crazy.She did not know where I lived,I would go to her place.We had done this on and off for 18 months.
anyhoo.She must have slipped off her meds.I texted her to see how she was.She texted back that if I text her again she would call the police.I said no problem.I will show them your left boob you texted me a few weeks earlier.

/I should see how she is doin.
 
2013-10-24 12:18:54 AM

ArcadianRefugee: Weird. I can't get miss diminutive's image, but SpaceBison's I get without even trying.

Maybe it's the size of the image pattern?


The period is twice as long as it looks like it should be. So when it seems like it should snap into focus, you have to keep going. If you look closely, you see that the pattern doesn't repeat where you think it does.

/does that make sense?
//once you do get it, it's pretty damn hard to read anyway.
 
Displayed 50 of 113 comments

First | « | 1 | 2 | 3 | » | Last | Show all

View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest


This thread is closed to new comments.

Continue Farking
Submit a Link »






Report