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(The Smoking Gun)   Florida teen arrested for pistol-dripping her boyfriend   (thesmokinggun.com) divider line 66
    More: Florida, dripping, handguns, teens, boyfriends  
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12310 clicks; posted to Main » on 22 Oct 2013 at 4:08 PM (26 weeks ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



66 Comments   (+0 »)
   
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2013-10-22 04:10:10 PM

Matt Kline · Top Commenter
She pulls a water pistol you pull a bucket, she sends one of yours to the sprinkler you send one of her to the pool! That's the Florida way.
Reply · 19 · Like · Follow Post · about an hour ago


Love this comment.
 
2013-10-22 04:10:13 PM
I heard they make pills for that sort of thing...
 
2013-10-22 04:10:17 PM
That sounds like a euphemism.
 
2013-10-22 04:12:34 PM
She's a squirter man, not sure if you can handle that.
 
2013-10-22 04:13:58 PM
Florida tag trumps asinine.
 
2013-10-22 04:14:31 PM
and the pussification of america progresses
 
2013-10-22 04:14:43 PM

vudukungfu: She's a squirter man, not sure if you can handle that.


Bathe her and send her to my plastic-sheet-lined chambers.
 
2013-10-22 04:15:45 PM
She should say she was standing her ground.
 
2013-10-22 04:16:47 PM
That article read like the start of sexy time.  What the hell happened?

Also:

Baelz: Florida tag trumps asinine.

 
2013-10-22 04:25:18 PM
Next week on America's Most Wanted:

www.worldofstock.com
 
2013-10-22 04:27:25 PM

exick: vudukungfu: She's a squirter man, not sure if you can handle that.

Bathe her and send her to my plastic-sheet-lined chambers.


You going to need the Stanley Charger for the toys this time?
 
2013-10-22 04:31:18 PM

blatz514: That article read like the start of sexy time.  What the hell happened?

Also:

Baelz: Florida tag trumps asinine.


This.

Water gun/pillow fight? I'm in.
 
2013-10-22 04:32:44 PM

vudukungfu: She's a squirter man, not sure if you can handle that.


Speaking of squirting, you owe me a keyboard.
 
2013-10-22 04:33:08 PM
Boyfriend has pole position for "pussy of the year".

/ balls
//grow some
 
2013-10-22 04:34:29 PM
Bucket of water? That's one way to get her wet.
 
2013-10-22 04:35:16 PM
Wait, I missed the part where this is an Onion article.
 
2013-10-22 04:35:17 PM
How big of wimp must the boyfriend be to call the cops on his girlfriend for squirting him with a water gun?
I've heard of Nancy boys but he has to take the cake.
 
2013-10-22 04:35:46 PM

TommyDeuce: Boyfriend has pole position for "pussy of the year".

/ balls
//grow some


Exactly. Apparently he doesn't have siblings. First thing I thought was "Moooooooooom! She's squirting me with waaaaaater! Then she hit me with the piiiillow and said 'I'm not touching yooooou!'"
 
2013-10-22 04:37:53 PM
She was really going Overboard.
 
2013-10-22 04:39:41 PM

megarian: blatz514: That article read like the start of sexy time.  What the hell happened?

Also:

Baelz: Florida tag trumps asinine.

This.

Water gun/pillow fight? I'm in.


I love you.
 
2013-10-22 04:41:35 PM
"she "took a water pistol and squirted him with water." During the ensuing confrontation, Borge added, her boyfriend (whom she has dated for a year) dumped a container of water on her and struck her with a pillow."


That is, far and away, the most adorable domestic disturbance I've ever heard of.
 
2013-10-22 04:42:34 PM

OgreMagi: megarian: blatz514: That article read like the start of sexy time.  What the hell happened?

Also:

Baelz: Florida tag trumps asinine.

This.

Water gun/pillow fight? I'm in.

I love you.


PEW PEW PEW PEW!!!

/the trick is to fill the water pistol with whiskey and the pillow with chloroform-soaked rags
 
2013-10-22 04:43:57 PM
I, for one, am glad this menace has to attone for her horrendous crimes.

/Won't somebody help that poor man?!?
 
2013-10-22 04:46:15 PM

megarian: OgreMagi: megarian: blatz514: That article read like the start of sexy time.  What the hell happened?

Also:

Baelz: Florida tag trumps asinine.

This.

Water gun/pillow fight? I'm in.

I love you.

PEW PEW PEW PEW!!!

/the trick is to fill the water pistol with whiskey and the pillow with chloroform-soaked rags


If I use chloroform on you, I can't hear you screaming, "please don't stop!" in esctasy.

Ok, I know it's really "Stop, don't, please," but a guy can dream.
 
2013-10-22 04:47:38 PM

vudukungfu: She's a squirter man, not sure if you can handle that.


Urinary incontinence is a problem for some, yes.
 
2013-10-22 04:48:34 PM

vudukungfu: She's a squirter man, not sure if you can handle that.


You have no idea.  My wife is a squirter and we go through SO much freaking laundry.  Making the bed is a several layers of protection ordeal.
 
2013-10-22 04:50:23 PM

Louisiana_Sitar_Club: "she "took a water pistol and squirted him with water." During the ensuing confrontation, Borge added, her boyfriend (whom she has dated for a year) dumped a container of water on her and struck her with a pillow."


That is, far and away, the most adorable domestic disturbance I've ever heard of.


One that  normally after a good laugh may involve some form of sex.
 
2013-10-22 04:51:54 PM

abfalter: vudukungfu: She's a squirter man, not sure if you can handle that.

You have no idea.  My wife is a squirter and we go through SO much freaking laundry.  Making the bed is a several layers of protection ordeal.


If you love her, you'll sleep in the wet spot.

/obscure, or just old?
 
2013-10-22 04:52:02 PM

OgreMagi: megarian: OgreMagi: megarian: blatz514: That article read like the start of sexy time.  What the hell happened?

Also:

Baelz: Florida tag trumps asinine.

This.

Water gun/pillow fight? I'm in.

I love you.

PEW PEW PEW PEW!!!

/the trick is to fill the water pistol with whiskey and the pillow with chloroform-soaked rags

If I use chloroform on you, I can't hear you screaming, "please don't stop!" in esctasy.

Ok, I know it's really "Stop, don't, please," but a guy can dream.


Pfffft who cares about word order? I heard what I heard.
 
2013-10-22 04:52:22 PM

Louisiana_Sitar_Club: "she "took a water pistol and squirted him with water." During the ensuing confrontation, Borge added, her boyfriend (whom she has dated for a year) dumped a container of water on her and struck her with a pillow."


That is, far and away, the most adorable domestic disturbance I've ever heard of.


The police were involved over that?  WTF?  Around here we call that "foreplay".
 
2013-10-22 04:53:19 PM
Strange. Florida has a stand your ground law and strict anti squirt gun laws.
 
2013-10-22 04:54:03 PM

Delawheredad: How big of wimp must the boyfriend be to call the cops on his girlfriend for squirting him with a water gun?
I've heard of Nancy boys but he has to take the cake.


Same town as this story (PSL), my sister's ex-fiancee had her arrested because she playfully threw a handful of dry dog food at him.

The smartest thing he ever did was not show up for that court date.

After living here for almost 25 years, I can say yes, most of the males here are Nancy boys.
 
2013-10-22 04:54:23 PM

OgreMagi: megarian: OgreMagi: megarian: blatz514: That article read like the start of sexy time.  What the hell happened?

Also:

Baelz: Florida tag trumps asinine.

This.

Water gun/pillow fight? I'm in.

I love you.

PEW PEW PEW PEW!!!

/the trick is to fill the water pistol with whiskey and the pillow with chloroform-soaked rags

If I use chloroform on you, I can't hear you screaming, "please don't stop!" in esctasy.

Ok, I know it's really "Stop, don't, please," but a guy can dream.


img.fark.net
 
2013-10-22 04:55:18 PM

Delawheredad: How big of wimp must the boyfriend be to call the cops on his girlfriend for squirting him with a water gun?
I've heard of Nancy boys but he has to take the cake.


It doesn't say who called the po-lice.  My unsubstantiated opinion is she did after he dumped her in the bathtub.
 
2013-10-22 04:55:29 PM
I'm not 100% sure but I think I may have originally stolen that gif from megarian.  I've been dying to use it.
 
2013-10-22 04:58:51 PM

WTP 2: and the pussification of america progresses


Are you serious? You do realize it was more than just the water pistol don't you? At one point they even exchanged shoves.

At first I thought this must have been an article from The Onion disguised as a Smoking Gun piece.

I reckon I better take myself off to the police station and turn myself in. When we were kids I threw a bucket of water over my brother and then flour bombed him. They say it goes easier on one if one hands one's self in, what, what?
 
2013-10-22 05:06:43 PM

abfalter: vudukungfu: She's a squirter man, not sure if you can handle that.

You have no idea.  My wife is a squirter and we go through SO much freaking laundry.  Making the bed is a several layers of protection ordeal.


Go on...
 
2013-10-22 05:07:18 PM

Louisiana_Sitar_Club: I'm not 100% sure but I think I may have originally stolen that gif from megarian.  I've been dying to use it.


crunchiemummy.files.wordpress.com
 
2013-10-22 05:08:04 PM
She should have just shot him with a real gun and anyone nearby,  things would have been just ok then.
 
2013-10-22 05:08:23 PM

ZeroCorpse: She should say she was standing her ground.


This.  Talk about a screwed-up state...
 
2013-10-22 05:10:59 PM
One point for r/mensrights!

Take that, women!  See how you like it!
 
2013-10-22 05:16:00 PM
If only he was armed with a squirt gun this massacre may not have been escalated!  And what next, are we going to start banning super soakers???

/Damn Obama!
 
2013-10-22 05:17:44 PM

Delawheredad: How big of wimp must the boyfriend be to call the cops on his girlfriend for squirting him with a water gun?
I've heard of Nancy boys but he has to take the cake.


Maybe it was a super soaker. He needed teh bucket to stand his ground!

abfalter: vudukungfu: She's a squirter man, not sure if you can handle that.

You have no idea.  My wife is a squirter and we go through SO much freaking laundry.  Making the bed is a several layers of protection ordeal.


Lay down some tarps or get some rubbers sheets. My GF is a squirter, I thought she peed the bed the first time.
 
2013-10-22 05:23:13 PM

jaymanchu: If only he was armed with a squirt gun this massacre may not have been escalated!  And what next, are we going to start banning super soakers???

/Damn Obama!


Pfffft... I bet you're one of those Nerf Gun Nuts.
 
2013-10-22 05:39:03 PM
www.imfdb.org
approves
/was just sick and finally got caught up on old crappy movies
/wary of thinking anything is obscure on fark, but i got high hopes here
 
2013-10-22 05:45:59 PM
"assault with a water pistol" and they all moved away from me on the bench and the hairy eyeball and all sorts of mean and nasty things, 'til I said "and creating a nuisance."
 
2013-10-22 05:52:06 PM
As soon as she squirts me that means sexy time. And the squirt gun can say....
 
2013-10-22 05:55:04 PM

inner ted: [www.imfdb.org image 600x338]
approves
/was just sick and finally got caught up on old crappy movies
/wary of thinking anything is obscure on fark, but i got high hopes here


What, did AT&T Uverse give you a free three-month upgrade on your cable too?
 
2013-10-22 06:00:08 PM

fjnorton: As soon as she squirts me that means sexy time. And the squirt gun can say....


Stay "in sexy time" I was thinking.

\And I know you you thought what I meant
 
2013-10-22 06:02:59 PM
The Doctor approves.
images3.wikia.nocookie.net
 
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