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(Slate)   Hate your spouse? No? Aw, that's sweet. You're a couple of lovebirds. Now, imagine a future where you both live to be 150 years old. Ready to kill yourself yet?   (slate.com) divider line 34
    More: Scary, personalized medicine, Emanuel Cleaver, Jetsons, Joel Garreau, hate  
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9909 clicks; posted to Main » on 21 Oct 2013 at 11:11 PM (52 weeks ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



Voting Results (Funniest)
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest

2013-10-21 11:16:10 PM  
15 votes:

Mr. Eugenides: What does Hallmark suggest for the 125th anniversary?


depends
2013-10-21 11:42:17 PM  
3 votes:

Mr. Eugenides: What does Hallmark suggest for the 125th anniversary?


Let's see, if 75th anniversary is diamond, 125th anniversary would be oxygen.
2013-10-21 10:21:51 PM  
3 votes:
I'm a drunk and she's very fat. We probably won't live too long.
2013-10-21 08:19:19 PM  
3 votes:
Sounds okay. My parents stayed married out of spite.
2013-10-21 08:11:37 PM  
3 votes:
I might need that long for my 401K to mature.
2013-10-22 09:38:18 PM  
2 votes:

KawhostaYucwy: Am I the only one that wouldn't have a problem with this?

/lucky me... an actual happy marriage.


Yes, you are the only one. The very first of all the 151 comments in this thread is utterly meaningless. Ignore it entirely.
2013-10-22 01:20:38 AM  
2 votes:

Praying for the end of time


3.bp.blogspot.com

2013-10-22 12:49:50 AM  
2 votes:

mjjt: TeddyRooseveltsMustache: 150? I don't even plan on being 75....

Funny thing: all 74 year olds have changed their mind on that one


"Who wants to live to be 100? Someone who's 99." -- Bob Hope, before his 100th birthday.

"I'm so old, they cancelled my blood type." -- Bob Hope, after his 100th birthday.
2013-10-21 11:35:18 PM  
2 votes:

IamAwake: Subby:  I'd be perfectly ok with living to 150 with my wife.  Sorry that your life has been so unfortunate as to make you so jaded.


yours reads your fark post history too eh?
2013-10-21 10:03:00 PM  
2 votes:

DamnYankees: I know its rather unironic to say so, but I love my wife more than anything in the world. An extra 60 years would be fine with me.


We need a new On Golden Pond :-)
2013-10-21 08:18:46 PM  
2 votes:

Candygram4Mongo: Actually, I'm kind of okay with this...


She'll murder me in my sleep way before then.
2013-10-21 08:11:40 PM  
2 votes:
Most people will be Soylent Green before having to worry about that.
2013-10-22 09:32:48 AM  
1 votes:
Kill yourself?  You got that part wrong.

Like my father said on his 40th wedding anniversary:  "If I'd just killed her instead of marrying her, I'd be a free man right now."
2013-10-22 08:32:22 AM  
1 votes:

Candygram4Mongo: Actually, I'm kind of okay with this...


Something to be OK with then: Centenarian cougars.
2013-10-22 02:52:46 AM  
1 votes:

Ghastly: Every hundred years or so when you get sick of your physical appearance you can just program yourself a new one.


Great. It takes a woman 3 hours to pick out an outfit to go out to dinner. How long is this gonna take?
2013-10-22 02:08:21 AM  
1 votes:

JonBuck: Living that long would only be worthwhile if your body stayed youthful into your 130s. What's the point of living to 150 if you spend 80 years in a wheelchair?


So one day, if I live that long, I might be saying, "So I'm dating this woman and she's 130, but she's got the body of a 110-year-old." I cringe.
2013-10-22 01:42:11 AM  
1 votes:

Danger Avoid Death: justalittledonedout: Possibly if all other diseases are off the table. If not fark that. Getting old doed not look fun.

No, it doedn't.


Niiiice.
2013-10-22 01:40:09 AM  
1 votes:

justalittledonedout: Possibly if all other diseases are off the table. If not fark that. Getting old doed not look fun.


No, it doedn't.
2013-10-22 01:29:08 AM  
1 votes:

Infernalist: I imagine by the time that we reach a future where the average lifespan reaches 150, we'll have adapted our society to fit.


One would hope.

Imagine if you will [cue Twilight Zone music] someone who had been born in 1850 and was still alive today. Now look at the changes that person has had to go through, adapt to, accept and adjust to. Social mores, dress, lifestyle, housing, language, politics....if you're not a completely flexible and adaptable person, just the environmental changes would drive you mad over the course of your long life. Hell, in my aged grandmother's life (she's 98) we've gone from most people still traveling by horse and train, and using kerosene, to jet travel and the Internet. Not everyone can tolerate that kind of change.

It's not a question of "would you want to" live to be 150, or even if you could afford it, it's whether psychologically you could endure the massive alterations you'd experience. Look at all the people anxious to revert to a pre-1950's idyll, and imagine them forced to live a century and a half.
2013-10-22 01:26:32 AM  
1 votes:
Possibly if all other diseases are off the table. If not fark that. Getting old doed not look fun.
2013-10-22 01:01:46 AM  
1 votes:
There comes a time for every vampire when the idea of eternity becomes momentarily unbearable. Living in the shadows, feeding in the darkness with only your own company to keep, rots into a solitary, hollow existence. Immortality seems like a good idea, until you realize you're going to spend it alone. So I went to sleep, hoping that the sounds of the passing eras would fade out, and a sort of death might happen. But as I lay there, the world didn't sound like the place I had left, but something different.
[rock music begins]

Better. It became worthwhile to rise again as new gods were born and worshipped. Night and day, they were never alone. I would become one of them.
[feeds]

Whether it was that first meal, or a hundred years of rest, I'm not sure. But suddenly I was feeling better than ever. My senses so high they led me straight to the instrument of my resurrection, playing in my old house.
2013-10-22 12:37:49 AM  
1 votes:

TeddyRooseveltsMustache: 150? I don't even plan on being 75....


Funny thing: all 74 year olds have changed their mind on that one
2013-10-22 12:07:35 AM  
1 votes:
Quantum Apostrophe:

I just barely saw "space thread" before all my tabs disappeared and I looked around, no space thread here?

No of course it's not. It's a life extension thread, your other bread and butter.

And I just figured out how life extension works in your mind.

Atoms don't age, as of course you know. And entropy is the fate of all matter in the universe as Newton taught us.

So instead of eating food from an external source, thus introducing entropy into your system, you merely recycle your own atoms! Your own urine, feces, and semen you happily lap up, for the sole purpose of regurgitating the same predictable shiat on Fark. You'll live forever this way. Good show!
2013-10-22 12:02:43 AM  
1 votes:

sendtodave: FunkOut: Actually, if you both hate and love your spouse, it keeps things interesting.

I know! Everyone keeps telling you that you should cast her into the fire, but she's precious to you!


Mount Doom?
2013-10-21 11:51:19 PM  
1 votes:

Big_Doofus: DamnYankees: I know its rather unironic to say so, but I love my wife more than anything in the world. An extra 60 years would be fine with me.


Sorry, but she's banging the UPS guy.


Yeah but he gets all his RealDoll replacement orifices a day early, so it evens out.
2013-10-21 11:47:02 PM  
1 votes:
But by the time Ann and John Grant are 150, we may be living in a world where the family has itself become a kind of a cloud, a networked or latticed arrangement of relationships.

I know at least one family like that today. But maybe in the future, it won't just be them Hispanicals.


/hey, they are
//ain't a stereotype if true
2013-10-21 11:44:43 PM  
1 votes:
Actually, if you both hate and love your spouse, it keeps things interesting.
2013-10-21 11:41:16 PM  
1 votes:
Longevity will create an increase in the number of people claiming "waifus" and "husbandos" as legal spouses. Eventually, this will result in the collapse of society and the possible extinction of humanity. It's already starting in Japan.

/moe ruins everything.
2013-10-21 11:35:24 PM  
1 votes:

ISO15693: Don't ask me. I'm Mormon, and sealed to my wife for eternity. 150 years doesnt sound very long at all :)


Only one?

//Sorry, couldn't resist :)
2013-10-21 11:13:36 PM  
1 votes:
What does Hallmark suggest for the 125th anniversary?
2013-10-21 09:56:37 PM  
1 votes:
I know its rather unironic to say so, but I love my wife more than anything in the world. An extra 60 years would be fine with me.
2013-10-21 08:48:05 PM  
1 votes:

djkutch: John marries a woman 20 years younger, ensuring he will have a partner who can look after his well-being, taking him to all his body-part-replacement appointments as he moves toward his first centennial.

Ann, at 120, takes a well-sculpted 70-year-old boyfriend, but prudently decides to live with rather than marry him.

Same shiat as now, but I gotta believe Ann is in pedo territory.


Half your age plus seven. At 120 that puts the floor at 67. So she's fine.
2013-10-21 08:36:12 PM  
1 votes:
John marries a woman 20 years younger, ensuring he will have a partner who can look after his well-being, taking him to all his body-part-replacement appointments as he moves toward his first centennial.

Ann, at 120, takes a well-sculpted 70-year-old boyfriend, but prudently decides to live with rather than marry him.


Same shiat as now, but I gotta believe Ann is in pedo territory.
2013-10-21 08:22:01 PM  
1 votes:

Candygram4Mongo: Actually, I'm kind of okay with this...


Ditto.  Hope I'm not too blind to play video games by then.
 
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