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(Some Guy)   Here is some super good Jesus art of Him helping Adam sex up Eve and a tiger   (happynicetimepeople.com) divider line 70
    More: Amusing, pimps, Christian Identity, art  
•       •       •

5022 clicks; posted to Entertainment » on 21 Oct 2013 at 1:10 PM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



70 Comments   (+0 »)
   
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest

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2013-10-21 01:12:30 PM  
Jesus and the happy ending?
 
2013-10-21 01:13:34 PM  
Notice that Jesus wasn't there in the last two pictures?  That's when he was carrying them on the beach, or something.
 
2013-10-21 01:15:35 PM  

gnosis301: Notice that Jesus wasn't there in the last two pictures?  That's when he was carrying them on the beach, or something.


i.imgur.com
He was just nodding off somewhere. Typical Jesus.
 
2013-10-21 01:19:52 PM  
Jesus looked more like the 9/11 hijackers than he did the third guitarist from The Eagles.
 
2013-10-21 01:21:23 PM  
He kinda reminds me of Kenny Powers.
 
2013-10-21 01:25:06 PM  

OH GOD NOT COMIC SANS WHY GOD WHY

 
2013-10-21 01:27:34 PM  
Jesus looked more like the 9/11 hijackers than he did the third guitarist from The Eagles.

Why don't people realize that?  He was a short, dark skinned Jew. When people make up a God to worship, they have to look like them, otherwise they wouldn't worship him.
 
2013-10-21 01:28:31 PM  
happynicetimepeople.com

Jesus closes the deal to get Ron Livingston a small part in Aziz Ansari's latest comedy special.
 
2013-10-21 01:30:57 PM  
happynicetimepeople.com
Sorry I had to give your daughter cancer. You should've loved me moar. Totes your fault.
 
2013-10-21 01:32:11 PM  

gnosis301: Notice that Jesus wasn't there in the last two pictures?  That's when he was carrying them on the beach, or something.


He wasn't in the Subway ad, but:

FTFA: Why is Jesus not on this battlefield? TRICK QUESTION. Jesus, obviously, is a Confederate soldier, giving succor to his enemies, those dastardly Union thugs what broke the Constitution Jesus wrote.
 
2013-10-21 01:33:26 PM  
Man that Eve is smokin. And I wonder where Adam got his chest waxed at?
 
2013-10-21 01:33:54 PM  
I find it interesting that the tag "Christian Identity" is being used.  Only because a quick Google search shows me that "Christian Identity" is a racist, white supremacist theology that basically states that only white people are saved and everyone else is going to Hell.  And if you click on said tag, the results take you to this article and another one about a Catholic school girl doing martial arts.
 
2013-10-21 01:36:32 PM  
img.fark.net

This is the last time you and I are meeting like this. From now on you'll deliver all the payments to Jesus directly. If you have a problem, pray to Jesus. If someone doesn't pay, Jesus will handle it.
 
2013-10-21 01:39:43 PM  
Touching all the children?  Could this be where the priests learned the behavior?  Did you ever think of that Jesus?  You go around hugging and kissing and rubbing all up on little crippled children and saying you're "healing" them and then wonder why your priests think this is OK.

THEY LEARNED IT FROM WATCHING YOU JESUS!
 
2013-10-21 01:44:24 PM  

GalFriday: Touching all the children?  Could this be where the priests learned the behavior?  Did you ever think of that Jesus?  You go around hugging and kissing and rubbing all up on little crippled children and saying you're "healing" them and then wonder why your priests think this is OK.

THEY LEARNED IT FROM WATCHING YOU JESUS!


Well, priests are supposed to be the alter Christus...
 
2013-10-21 01:46:23 PM  
Entertainment tag, huh?
 
2013-10-21 01:48:58 PM  

Disgruntled Goat: Entertainment tag, huh?


i.qkme.me
 
2013-10-21 01:50:26 PM  
s2.postimg.org
I don't care what the ACA says. Republican Jesus gotsta get paid, son.
 
2013-10-21 02:01:27 PM  
Not a single dinosaur represented in the the garden.  For shame!
 
2013-10-21 02:16:41 PM  
happynicetimepeople.com
Jesus and his golden retriever, Sam, have cured your son of being in a wheelchair. That's just dumb. Who has this painting? Someone with a baby in a wheelchair? Don't you love your baby as he is? Do you want him to feel even worse because Jesus has not cured him of being in a wheelchair? Go fark yourself.

Eh, comment is only so-so, but also so wrong, and missing out on a whole range of witty material.  Jesus didn't cure the kid, the kid's dead, and no longer needs the wheelchair.  Hence, the shining city in the background.

All those kids in the background?  Dead.

And the wheelchair kid?  He's still sad and needs a hug.  Even though he's in Heaven now and can walk, he's still sad, because he's dead.

Time to start drinking now.
 
2013-10-21 02:20:53 PM  
happynicetimepeople.com

Looks like Jesus didn't rate a private room. Wonder what he is in there for?
 
2013-10-21 02:22:31 PM  
Hmmm...tiger.

i171.photobucket.com

Tiger tiger tiger.

/bird
/Jesus looks like the other guy from My Two Dads.
 
2013-10-21 02:24:24 PM  

GameSprocket: [happynicetimepeople.com image 342x472]

Looks like Jesus didn't rate a private room. Wonder what he is in there for?



Judging from the other paintings? I suspect he's in there for the kids.
 
2013-10-21 02:35:12 PM  
Nice but I like the way the colors pop on black velvet.  Besides I did the rec room in post modern Elvis
 
2013-10-21 02:41:58 PM  
A friend of mine used to be this guy's next door neighbor. Pretty nice guy, actually. As far as subject matter goes, if you are going to sell art to protestants, this is what it needs to look like.
 
2013-10-21 02:44:46 PM  
www.mindhuestudio.com
 
2013-10-21 02:47:27 PM  
I've used the "businessman Jesus" pic as my profile pic for years, but had no idea until now where it came from.
 
2013-10-21 02:48:53 PM  

Hollie Maea: A friend of mine used to be this guy's next door neighbor. Pretty nice guy, actually. As far as subject matter goes, if you are going to sell art to protestants, this is what it needs to look like.


media.smithsonianmag.com
And this is what it looks like when you sell it to Catholics.
m3.i.pbase.com
/this too
 
2013-10-21 02:57:05 PM  

Shrinkwrap: Man that Eve is smokin. And I wonder where Adam got his chest waxed at?


I'm more concerned about his mid-90s haircut.  I don't remember anything in Genesis concerning the creation of hair stylists.
 
2013-10-21 02:59:24 PM  

carrion_luggage: [img.fark.net image 574x451]

This is the last time you and I are meeting like this. From now on you'll deliver all the payments to Jesus directly. If you have a problem, pray to Jesus. If someone doesn't pay, Jesus will handle it.


Now the guy's got Jesus as a partner. Any problems, he goes to Jesus. Trouble with the bill? He can go to Jesus. Trouble with the cops, deliveries, Judas, he can call on Jesus. But now the guy's gotta come up with Jesus' tribute every Sunday, no matter what.

/fark you, pray to me
 
2013-10-21 03:02:59 PM  

Dwight_Yeast: Shrinkwrap: Man that Eve is smokin. And I wonder where Adam got his chest waxed at?

I'm more concerned about his mid-90s haircut.  I don't remember anything in Genesis concerning the creation of hair stylists.


Or the fact that apparently Adam doesn't have nipples. Guess that they were a Version 2.0 and later feature...
 
2013-10-21 03:05:48 PM  

Trocadero: Hollie Maea: A friend of mine used to be this guy's next door neighbor. Pretty nice guy, actually. As far as subject matter goes, if you are going to sell art to protestants, this is what it needs to look like.

[media.smithsonianmag.com image 631x300]
And this is what it looks like when you sell it to Catholics.
[m3.i.pbase.com image 768x497]
/this too


You can blame the counter-reformation for the drop in the quality of Catholic art. The Church and the inquisition demanded that art be made simple, straighforward and clearly understandable by the illiterate in the 1600s and the style of propaganda art that was invented by so successful it became the model for almost all Catholic art into the middle of the 20th century.
 
2013-10-21 03:24:50 PM  
bornagainpagan.com
 
2013-10-21 03:27:28 PM  
Heh, you guys should do Muhammad next! It's so funny ridiculing other people's religions.
 
2013-10-21 03:44:30 PM  

McGentrix: Heh, you guys should do Muhammad next! It's so funny ridiculing other people's religions.


Please link me to a site of typical Muhammad art ... I will happily mock it if it is ridiculous as Jesus art.
 
2013-10-21 03:45:11 PM  
Oh, get off your cross.
 
2013-10-21 03:49:56 PM  

McGentrix: Heh, you guys should do Muhammad next! It's so funny ridiculing other people's religions.


Challenge accepted.

4.bp.blogspot.com
 
2013-10-21 03:50:02 PM  

serial arseonist: carrion_luggage: [img.fark.net image 574x451]

This is the last time you and I are meeting like this. From now on you'll deliver all the payments to Jesus directly. If you have a problem, pray to Jesus. If someone doesn't pay, Jesus will handle it.

Now the guy's got Jesus as a partner. Any problems, he goes to Jesus. Trouble with the bill? He can go to Jesus. Trouble with the cops, deliveries, Judas, he can call on Jesus. But now the guy's gotta come up with Jesus' tribute every Sunday, no matter what.

/fark you, pray to me


i105.photobucket.com
 
2013-10-21 03:58:52 PM  

Farking Canuck: McGentrix: Heh, you guys should do Muhammad next! It's so funny ridiculing other people's religions.

Please link me to a site of typical Muhammad art ... I will happily mock it if it is ridiculous as Jesus art.


http://www.zombietime.com/mohammed_image_archive/islamic_mo_full/
 
2013-10-21 04:06:23 PM  

Farking Canuck: McGentrix: Heh, you guys should do Muhammad next! It's so funny ridiculing other people's religions.

Please link me to a site of typical Muhammad art ... I will happily mock it if it is ridiculous as Jesus art.


http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Depictions_of_Muhammad

My favorite is the way the Ottomen Turks depicted him in the 1600s: they showed his body but never his face:

upload.wikimedia.org
 
2013-10-21 04:08:56 PM  

McGentrix: Heh, you guys should do Muhammad next! It's so funny ridiculing other people's religions.


You know there's a really simple solution for that, if you don't want to be ridiculed, don't believe ridiculous things.

i1.kym-cdn.com
 
2013-10-21 04:11:16 PM  

McGentrix: Farking Canuck: McGentrix: Heh, you guys should do Muhammad next! It's so funny ridiculing other people's religions.

Please link me to a site of typical Muhammad art ... I will happily mock it if it is ridiculous as Jesus art.

http://www.zombietime.com/mohammed_image_archive/islamic_mo_full/


...which is a great illustration of why fundamentalist Muslims want (well, really, need) to destroy anything which predates the creation of their own beliefs in the late 19th century: Islam has a long and noble history of being a religion of moderation and tolerance.
 
2013-10-21 04:13:22 PM  

ReverendLoki: [happynicetimepeople.com image 358x459]
Jesus and his golden retriever, Sam, have cured your son of being in a wheelchair. That's just dumb. Who has this painting? Someone with a baby in a wheelchair? Don't you love your baby as he is? Do you want him to feel even worse because Jesus has not cured him of being in a wheelchair? Go fark yourself.

Eh, comment is only so-so, but also so wrong, and missing out on a whole range of witty material.  Jesus didn't cure the kid, the kid's dead, and no longer needs the wheelchair.  Hence, the shining city in the background.

All those kids in the background?  Dead.

And the wheelchair kid?  He's still sad and needs a hug.  Even though he's in Heaven now and can walk, he's still sad, because he's dead.

Time to start drinking now.


Nothing says love like a bunch of dead kids.
 
2013-10-21 04:36:20 PM  
The paintings are twisted enough on their own without the bizarre and moronic commentary.
 
2013-10-21 04:49:17 PM  

Kali-Yuga: McGentrix: Heh, you guys should do Muhammad next! It's so funny ridiculing other people's religions.

You know there's a really simple solution for that, if you don't want to be ridiculed, don't believe ridiculous things.

[i1.kym-cdn.com image 360x600]


Glory Glory Holelujah
 
2013-10-21 05:01:19 PM  

McGentrix: Farking Canuck: McGentrix: Heh, you guys should do Muhammad next! It's so funny ridiculing other people's religions.

Please link me to a site of typical Muhammad art ... I will happily mock it if it is ridiculous as Jesus art.

http://www.zombietime.com/mohammed_image_archive/islamic_mo_full/


Well done. Not sure they have the same level of humor as the christian ones. They depict Mohammad as the correct race and they seem to be attempts at historical representations.

The christian ones are hilarious as they depict Jesus as white and they insert him into modern life (usually with him touching children - It is almost as if they are drawn by catholic priests).
 
2013-10-21 05:14:30 PM  

Farking Canuck: McGentrix: Farking Canuck: McGentrix: Heh, you guys should do Muhammad next! It's so funny ridiculing other people's religions.

Please link me to a site of typical Muhammad art ... I will happily mock it if it is ridiculous as Jesus art.

http://www.zombietime.com/mohammed_image_archive/islamic_mo_full/

Well done. Not sure they have the same level of humor as the christian ones. They depict Mohammad as the correct race and they seem to be attempts at historical representations.

The christian ones are hilarious as they depict Jesus as white and they insert him into modern life (usually with him touching children - It is almost as if they are drawn by catholic priests).


Probably because there aren't a million crazies threatening the artist with death for painting their prophet. I figured you'd pussy out, looks like I was right.
 
2013-10-21 05:41:18 PM  

McGentrix: Farking Canuck: McGentrix: Farking Canuck: McGentrix: Heh, you guys should do Muhammad next! It's so funny ridiculing other people's religions.

Please link me to a site of typical Muhammad art ... I will happily mock it if it is ridiculous as Jesus art.

http://www.zombietime.com/mohammed_image_archive/islamic_mo_full/

Well done. Not sure they have the same level of humor as the christian ones. They depict Mohammad as the correct race and they seem to be attempts at historical representations.

The christian ones are hilarious as they depict Jesus as white and they insert him into modern life (usually with him touching children - It is almost as if they are drawn by catholic priests).

Probably because there aren't a million crazies threatening the artist with death for painting their prophet. I figured you'd pussy out, looks like I was right.


LOL... those nails in your wrists must be making you grumpy.

Please point out what is funny about those pictures. I explained the humor in the white-Jesus, kid fondling paintings. Your turn to point out the humor in the Muhammad paintings.  I look forward to your witty insight.

You do understand that the mocking is centered around humor right? That there are probably thousands of Jesus paintings that are not mocked? Right?
 
2013-10-21 05:47:01 PM  

McGentrix: Probably because there aren't a million crazies threatening the artist with death for painting their prophet. I figured you'd pussy out, looks like I was right.


I didn't, but you've ignored my posts.

I'm not offended, because I know you're trolling.

/cue: "No! You Troll!" in 5... 4... 3...
 
2013-10-21 06:14:17 PM  

Dwight_Yeast: McGentrix: Probably because there aren't a million crazies threatening the artist with death for painting their prophet. I figured you'd pussy out, looks like I was right.

I didn't, but you've ignored my posts.

I'm not offended, because I know you're trolling.

/cue: "No! You Troll!" in 5... 4... 3...


Sorry, didn't realize you needed a pat on the head.

Well done sir!
 
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