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(International Business Times)   Teen literally hits pay dirt on family vacation   (ibtimes.com) divider line 86
    More: Weird, Tana Clymer, Oklahoma City, The Oklahoman  
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15859 clicks; posted to Main » on 21 Oct 2013 at 3:00 PM (26 weeks ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



86 Comments   (+0 »)
   
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2013-10-21 10:19:33 AM
The gem in the story is the one holding the rock.
 
2013-10-21 10:26:15 AM
Clymer found the diamond, which she nicknamed "God's Jewel"

"I think God pointed me to it. I was about to sprint to join my family, and God told me to slow down and look. Then, I found the diamond!"


Oh, for Fark's sake.  "It was God!"  Please.  It was Saturday.  Everybody knows God was busy fixing football games and even individual plays, in exchange for on-camera ass-kissing.
 
ZAZ [TotalFark]
2013-10-21 10:37:54 AM
Some guy is going to be very disappointed when he proposes. "Two carats is nice, but let me tell you about the one I got when I was 14..."
 
2013-10-21 11:42:36 AM

ZAZ: Some guy is going to be very disappointed when he proposes. "Two carats is nice, but let me tell you about the one I got when I was 14..."


"And God gave it to me....what have YOU done for me lately?"
 
2013-10-21 01:16:01 PM

Cewley: The gem in the story is the one holding the rock.


:::: cue Chris Hansen pic ::::
 
2013-10-21 01:29:21 PM
I recently lost that very same 3.85-carat diamond.  It fell out of my tiara when I was visiting Wherever the hell you Wereland.

It can only be described  as the one pictured, unless that was just an elaborate ruse to keep me separated from my royal birthrite.
 
2013-10-21 01:42:10 PM
"I think God pointed me to it. I was about to sprint to join my family, and God told me to slow down and look. Then, I found the diamond!"

-She has an extra chromosome
 
2013-10-21 01:50:39 PM

Benevolent Misanthrope: Oh, for Fark's sake. "It was God!" Please. It was Saturday. Everybody knows God was busy fixing football games and even individual plays, in exchange for on-camera ass-kissing.


No kidding. Every time I complete something difficult or special at work, I'm pretty sure I'd get some strange looks if I dropped to one knee and pointed at the sky.
 
2013-10-21 01:53:56 PM
SurfaceTension:

No kidding. Every time I complete something difficult or special at work, I'm pretty sure I'd get some strange looks if I dropped to one knee and pointed at the sky.

Not even the special or difficult plays but the ones they're supposed to make each rep.
 
2013-10-21 02:16:17 PM

2wolves: Not even the special or difficult plays but the ones they're supposed to make each rep.


I just wrote a line of code! *chest thump, and point to the sky*
 
2013-10-21 02:21:45 PM

SurfaceTension: 2wolves: Not even the special or difficult plays but the ones they're supposed to make each rep.

I just wrote a line of code! *chest thump, and point to the sky*


I wonder if heavily christian coders put in comments that say things like

/* Praise Jesus for the ability to make this code compile */

/I've never run into anything remotely like that.
//I'm sure someone will point something out though.
 
2013-10-21 02:25:21 PM
Teen literally hits pay dirt on family vacation

So she got on her hands and knees and started punching the ground?

Or is her brother named 'pay dirt'?
 
2013-10-21 02:50:53 PM

Benevolent Misanthrope: Clymer found the diamond, which she nicknamed "God's Jewel"

"I think God pointed me to it. I was about to sprint to join my family, and God told me to slow down and look. Then, I found the diamond!"

Oh, for Fark's sake.  "It was God!"  Please.  It was Saturday.  Everybody knows God was busy fixing football games and even individual plays, in exchange for on-camera ass-kissing.


If I heard a voice from above that was saying "You're getting warm... Warmer...warmer" It's entirely possible I'd run.

Not to mention God could have just put it in her pocket instead of playing these childish games you'd do at an Easter Egg hunt.  ....though, now see the connection.  Now I get it!  Ha! Ha!  Very funny, God!
 
2013-10-21 03:05:04 PM
Cute kid, shame that she hears voices. I hope she gets the help that she needs.
 
2013-10-21 03:07:12 PM

dletter: Cewley: The gem in the story is the one holding the rock.

:::: cue Chris Hansen pic ::::


imageshack.us
Over there>
 
2013-10-21 03:07:20 PM

Benevolent Misanthrope: Clymer found the diamond, which she nicknamed "God's Jewel"

"I think God pointed me to it. I was about to sprint to join my family, and God told me to slow down and look. Then, I found the diamond!"

Oh, for Fark's sake.  "It was God!"  Please.  It was Saturday.  Everybody knows God was busy fixing football games and even individual plays, in exchange for on-camera ass-kissing.


God loves diamonds and teenagers in wealthy nations, but He sure hates clean water and teenagers in poor nations...
 
2013-10-21 03:07:21 PM
God this God that god damnit you stupid farking coont.
 
2013-10-21 03:07:40 PM
God's Jewel. Yay God!'

Thanks Latoya.

/// Dumbass child needs a strikin
 
2013-10-21 03:09:11 PM
Whenever I hear people talking about what God said or did, I replace the word "God" with "my toaster."
It makes just as much sense and really puts into perspective how unbalanced this stuff sounds to a non-believer.

Clymer found the diamond, which she nicknamed "My Toaster's Jewel" in the 37-acre area of the state park.
"I think my toaster pointed me to it. I was about to sprint to join my family, and my toaster told me to slow down and look. Then, I found the diamond!
 
2013-10-21 03:09:24 PM

HotWingConspiracy: Cute kid, shame that she hears voices. I hope she gets the help that she needs.


Now under the ACA she can.
 
2013-10-21 03:09:32 PM

HotWingConspiracy: Cute kid, shame that she hears voices. I hope she gets the help that she needs.


If voices in my head were leading me to buried diamonds, the only help I'd need is where to find a shovel.
 
2013-10-21 03:10:41 PM

RottNDude: God this God that god damnit you stupid farking coont.


She's 14. She hasn't purged her parental programming yet.
 
2013-10-21 03:14:25 PM
It's always sad to hear young people say this stuff, because it's either tragically true that she heard a voice in her head, or it's a blatant lie told to make adults think she's "godly".

People who grow up always attributing everything good or bad in their life to god seem broken to me. What's the point of living if God's just pushing you around the planet.
 
2013-10-21 03:14:46 PM
She accepted a diamond from God. She better remain celibate and become a nun or he'll be pissed that she broke their engagement.
 
2013-10-21 03:16:27 PM
Well, good for her, she'll be able to pay for college on her own.   Well, part of it anyway given how inflation goes.
 
2013-10-21 03:16:33 PM
See?

God gives everyone what they deserve.
 
2013-10-21 03:16:34 PM

visio: HotWingConspiracy: Cute kid, shame that she hears voices. I hope she gets the help that she needs.

If voices in my head were leading me to buried diamonds, the only help I'd need is where to find a shovel.


God's a dick like that.
 
2013-10-21 03:16:48 PM

WhackingDay: It's always sad to hear young people say this stuff, because it's either tragically true that she heard a voice in her head, or it's a blatant lie told to make adults think she's "godly".

People who grow up always attributing everything good or bad in their life to god seem broken to me. What's the point of living if God's just pushing you around the planet.


Most people only attribute the good in their life to God. The bad is attributed to Obama.
 
2013-10-21 03:18:59 PM
something something HIT PAY DIRT..something something IN HER DIAMOND..something something IF YA KNOW WHAT I MEAN

AM i RITE??
 
2013-10-21 03:19:10 PM

Benevolent Misanthrope: Oh, for Fark's sake. "It was God!" Please. It was Saturday. Everybody knows God was busy fixing football games and even individual plays, in exchange for on-camera ass-kissing.


If Jesus was alive today, you know damn well he'd have front row endzone tickets.
 
2013-10-21 03:19:20 PM

Lt. Cheese Weasel: dletter: Cewley: The gem in the story is the one holding the rock.

:::: cue Chris Hansen pic ::::

[imageshack.us image 140x381]
Over there>


Dude, Cewley is 13.  He's lusting after older women!
 
2013-10-21 03:20:27 PM
Cool story. Coolest thing I ever found were a couple fossils and civil war bullet. Hrm...I did find some garnet embedded in a larger stone once but the bits are way too small to be worth anything.

/loves digging in the dirt for buried treasures
//just need a fedora and a bullwhip
 
2013-10-21 03:21:55 PM
Who owns the mineral rights in a state park?
 
2013-10-21 03:22:28 PM

Memoryalpha: Well, good for her, she'll be able to pay for college on her own.   Well, part of it anyway given how inflation goes.


Are you kidding me?  That's about one, two semesters tops.  She's gonna need to spend a little more time at that park.
 
2013-10-21 03:24:27 PM
I got a rock.
 
2013-10-21 03:28:30 PM
Disappointed. Article URL reads "tana clymer oklahoma city teen finds 385 carat diamond state park". Reality of 3.85 carat diamond was a let down.
 
2013-10-21 03:29:07 PM

HotWingConspiracy: Cute kid, shame that she hears voices. I hope she gets the help that she needs.


For the delusions and the anorexia both.
 
2013-10-21 03:31:35 PM
Subby almost missed this article, but God told him to click the link.
 
2013-10-21 03:34:31 PM

Frankentots: Memoryalpha: Well, good for her, she'll be able to pay for college on her own.   Well, part of it anyway given how inflation goes.

Are you kidding me?  That's about one, two semesters tops.  She's gonna need to spend a little more time at that park.


I met a guy at that park who put all seven of his kids through college by finding the diamonds that tourists overlooked when they were panning.

/I didn't find shiat
 
2013-10-21 03:36:18 PM
Now the park will get ten times the tourist. You have to drop a rock now and then.
 
2013-10-21 03:36:51 PM
Arkansas?

*reads article*

Yep.
 
2013-10-21 03:37:36 PM

dletter: I wonder if heavily christian coders put in comments that say things like

/* Praise Jesus for the ability to make this code compile */


I'm an Atheist and have been known to say such things. Not as a comment, though.
 
2013-10-21 03:39:21 PM

Benevolent Misanthrope: Clymer found the diamond, which she nicknamed "God's Jewel"

"I think God pointed me to it. I was about to sprint to join my family, and God told me to slow down and look. Then, I found the diamond!"

Oh, for Fark's sake.  "It was God!"  Please.  It was Saturday.  Everybody knows God was busy fixing football games and even individual plays, in exchange for on-camera ass-kissing.


FTFA:  The canary diamond, named for its yellowish hue, was sent for testing, which revealed the 3.85-carat diamond was gem quality. While it hasn't been appraised, a similar diamond found in 2006 was sold for $30,000.

Maybe she can use the proceeds from her diamond to help pay her tuition to Liberty U.

:P
 
2013-10-21 03:43:46 PM
She needs to thank the Flying Spaghetti Monster, he's the god responsible for helping stupid teenagers find huge diamonds in the dirt. Sheesh, some people.
 
2013-10-21 03:44:00 PM

SurfaceTension: 2wolves: Not even the special or difficult plays but the ones they're supposed to make each rep.

I just wrote a line of code! *chest thump, and point to the sky*



In all fairness, a totally elegant block of code coming together can feel pretty thump-worthy.
 
2013-10-21 03:45:22 PM

SurfaceTension: dletter: I wonder if heavily christian coders put in comments that say things like

/* Praise Jesus for the ability to make this code compile */

I'm an Atheist and have been known to say such things. Not as a comment, though.


I'm a very large fan of Jesus [Expletive] Christ.
 
2013-10-21 03:47:52 PM
oh gawd!
 
2013-10-21 03:51:55 PM

visio: HotWingConspiracy: Cute kid, shame that she hears voices. I hope she gets the help that she needs.

If voices in my head were leading me to buried diamonds, the only help I'd need is where to find a shovel.


Funny 'cause the voices in my head would put me in situation where I would end up needing a shovel as well.
 
2013-10-21 03:53:19 PM
I could have sworn this story was a few months old, at least. I distinctly remember some kid finding a diamond and naming it "God's Jewel" or some sappy shiat like that. Same park, too. Unless since this is in Arkansas, every idiot uses that name for diamonds, which could be very likely. Or am I having an aneurysm?
 
2013-10-21 03:53:50 PM
the God hate in this thread is ginormous.
You guys better hope your right.
Funny how the older one gets the more religious one becomes.
 
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