If you can read this, either the style sheet didn't load or you have an older browser that doesn't support style sheets. Try clearing your browser cache and refreshing the page.

(Gawker)   33-year-old songwriter spends almost $100,000 to look like Justin Bieber, still can't get anyone to carry him up the Great Wall of China   (gawker.com) divider line 37
    More: Dumbass, Justin Bieber, songwriters, hair transplant, british tabloid  
•       •       •

3981 clicks; posted to Entertainment » on 19 Oct 2013 at 1:30 PM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



37 Comments   (+0 »)
   
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest
 
2013-10-19 12:16:07 PM  
And not one person will mistake him for the Bieb.
 
2013-10-19 12:53:09 PM  
Who the hell has $100k just lying around??
 
2013-10-19 01:28:58 PM  
Honestly I think that's just sad and awful. I wanted to mock him but I just feel overwhelming amounts of pity. He looks better before. He looked normal.
 
2013-10-19 01:36:21 PM  
2.bp.blogspot.com

Captain Said
: What is the problem with Michael Jackson?
Sargeant Barlow: What do you mean?
Captain Said: What...Is...The...Problem...With Michael Jackson? You understand my question?
Sargeant Barlow: No, I'm not sure I do.
Captain Said: The king of pop, ooh-hoo, ee-hee.
Sargeant Barlow: Yeah, Michael Jackson.
Captain Said: He come to Egypt, I see picture in newspaper. "Hello" with the white glove. I'm Michael Jackson in my autoroom, with my chop up face. Your country make him chop up his face.
Sargeant Barlow: I don't think so.
Captain Said: Michael Jackson is pop king of sick farking country.
Sargeant Barlow: That's bullshiat, he did it to himself.
(Captain Said hits Sargeant Barlow on the head with a clipboard)
Captain Said: You are the blind bullshiat my main man. It's obvious, a black man make the skin white and the hair straight, and you know why?
Sargeant Barlow: No.
Captain Said: Your sick farking country make the black man hate himself just like you hate the Arab and the children you bomb over here.
 
2013-10-19 01:42:52 PM  
i.imgur.com
 
2013-10-19 01:47:17 PM  

farkingismybusiness: [i.imgur.com image 500x750]


What is this I don't even

/context, please?
 
2013-10-19 01:48:03 PM  
It's sad because Bieber himself can't possibly have a lot of time left. Unless you're the Beatles, the shelf life of pop stars who tweens gush over is not very long. Unless he can switch over to something else like Timberlake did, he had better start investing his millions. Or stop buying Ferraris and monkeys on a whim.
 
2013-10-19 01:48:32 PM  

Slaxl: Honestly I think that's just sad and awful. I wanted to mock him but I just feel overwhelming amounts of pity. He looks better before. He looked normal.


There should be laws about plastic surgeons operating on the clearly deranged.
 
2013-10-19 01:48:43 PM  
what.the.fark
 
2013-10-19 01:53:31 PM  
Your friends calling you, "Toby Bieber" is not a compliment.
 
2013-10-19 01:53:40 PM  

FunkOut: There should be laws about plastic surgeons operating on the clearly deranged.


I always thought that unnecessary and/or harmful plastic surgery violated the Hippocratic Oath somehow. Obviously it doesn't.
 
2013-10-19 01:54:44 PM  

the_vegetarian_cannibal: farkingismybusiness: [i.imgur.com image 500x750]

What is this I don't even

/context, please?


img.pandawhale.com
elitedaily.com
www.theamas.com
All I got.
 
2013-10-19 01:56:06 PM  
i.imgur.com
 
2013-10-19 01:59:55 PM  

Mugato: FunkOut: There should be laws about plastic surgeons operating on the clearly deranged.

I always thought that unnecessary and/or harmful plastic surgery violated the Hippocratic Oath somehow. Obviously it doesn't.


Surgeons unscrupulous enough to do that to people don't give a sh*t about any oaths
 
2013-10-19 02:03:33 PM  
TOBY KEITH JUSTIN BIEBER FACE SWAP PLEASE!

ahem...sorry I got excited.
 
2013-10-19 02:05:28 PM  

The Slush: Mugato: FunkOut: There should be laws about plastic surgeons operating on the clearly deranged.

I always thought that unnecessary and/or harmful plastic surgery violated the Hippocratic Oath somehow. Obviously it doesn't.

Surgeons unscrupulous enough to do that to people don't give a sh*t about any oaths


Yeah I know but I thought there might be some sort of oversight, like how lawyers can get disbarred. But there are a lot of scumbag lawyers so I guess all the rules governing those professions are meaningless
 
2013-10-19 02:05:56 PM  
HOLY SHIAT what a freakshow!
 
2013-10-19 02:11:10 PM  
So, a Nubieber?

img.fark.net
 
2013-10-19 02:19:56 PM  
What's truly sad was that he appeared to be a cute guy who was aging well.

/would totally fark him before plastic surgery
//no way after
 
2013-10-19 02:22:28 PM  

gingerjet: What's truly sad was that he appeared to be a cute guy who was aging well.

/would totally fark him before plastic surgery
//no way after


He looked kinda like Mat Damon in the before picture.
 
2013-10-19 03:45:26 PM  
LA-based "songwriter" Toby Sheldon idolizes Bieber to such an extent

Generally speaking, it can't be a good thing when a publication puts quotation marks around your stated profession.
 
2013-10-19 03:55:58 PM  
If he wants to complete his transition to Justin Bieber, he's going to have to shell out more for the sex change operation.
 
2013-10-19 04:06:56 PM  
There's a worker at a gas station I frequent on the way to college that's a dead ringer for Bieber. She's a girl. I won't be the dick that says she's a lesbian, but, ya kno, it wouldn't be that big of a stretch.
 
2013-10-19 04:14:03 PM  

Killer Cars: LA-based "songwriter" Toby Sheldon idolizes Bieber to such an extent

Generally speaking, it can't be a good thing when a publication puts quotation marks around your stated profession.


When just calling it "self described" doesn't cut it...
 
2013-10-19 04:52:11 PM  
One day, one of these thoroughly depressing articles is going to catch me the wrong way and I'm just going to drink bleach.
 
2013-10-19 05:26:21 PM  
If ever someone needed to be made to cut their own face off and feed it to their dog, it's this guy.
 
2013-10-19 05:43:09 PM  
A Fool and his money are soon parted.............


fear of aging?    only death can cure aging.


something tells me he won't be happy with his 40's.
 
2013-10-19 06:33:51 PM  

Linux_Yes: A Fool and his money are soon parted.............


fear of aging?    only death can cure aging.


something tells me he won't be happy with his 40's.


I doubt he'll make it that long. He's a 33 year old man so obsessed with youth that he's had himself surgically altered to look like a 19 year old. I'm calling it now, suicide by taking a 30 foot drop ass first onto a fire hydrant.
 
2013-10-19 09:13:03 PM  
This guy needs a psychiatrist, stat! He got a Glasgow smile to look more like Justin Bieber?
 
2013-10-19 10:29:49 PM  
With that kind of money, you'd think he could afford a mirror.
 
2013-10-20 01:01:46 AM  

katerbug72: This guy needs a psychiatrist, stat! He got a Glasgow smile to look more like Justin Bieber?


A Glasgow smile would be a major step up from that creepy as fark gash on his face. It's part Stepford Ken, part Cheshire Cat. It's a nightmare face. A nightmare where everybody looks the same, and is always smiling. But they really want to eat your heart.
 
2013-10-20 08:01:30 AM  
How about we let adults do whatever they want to themselves?

If I want to get a boob job or look more like white-Christian's interpretation of Jesus....seems like that should be my business.
 
2013-10-20 08:59:58 AM  

Fark_Guy_Rob: How about we let adults do whatever they want to themselves?

If I want to get a boob job or look more like white-Christian's interpretation of Jesus....seems like that should be my business.


I don't see anyone stopping him. We're just mocking/feeling sorry for him.
 
2013-10-20 09:53:09 AM  
"It's Justin's smile that gives him his youthful look,"

Ummm... No. Its the fact that he's 19 that gives him his youthful look. Hope he gets some help. But I doubt it.
 
2013-10-20 10:06:34 AM  

NewportBarGuy: Who the hell has $100k just lying around??


Every Farker in every real estate or retirement thread.
 
2013-10-20 10:58:20 AM  

LectertheChef: katerbug72: This guy needs a psychiatrist, stat! He got a Glasgow smile to look more like Justin Bieber?

A Glasgow smile would be a major step up from that creepy as fark gash on his face. It's part Stepford Ken, part Cheshire Cat. It's a nightmare face. A nightmare where everybody looks the same, and is always smiling. But they really want to eat your heart.


This.

I was definitely getting a Soundgarden-Black-Hole-Sun vibe from his picture...
 
2013-10-20 12:20:02 PM  

I Am A Leaf On the Wind: LectertheChef: katerbug72: This guy needs a psychiatrist, stat! He got a Glasgow smile to look more like Justin Bieber?

A Glasgow smile would be a major step up from that creepy as fark gash on his face. It's part Stepford Ken, part Cheshire Cat. It's a nightmare face. A nightmare where everybody looks the same, and is always smiling. But they really want to eat your heart.

This.

I was definitely getting a Soundgarden-Black-Hole-Sun vibe from his picture...


That is perfect.
 
Displayed 37 of 37 comments

View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest


This thread is closed to new comments.

Continue Farking
Submit a Link »
On Twitter





In Other Media


  1. Links are submitted by members of the Fark community.

  2. When community members submit a link, they also write a custom headline for the story.

  3. Other Farkers comment on the links. This is the number of comments. Click here to read them.

  4. Click here to submit a link.

Report