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(io9)   Researchers discover that all mammals take about 21 seconds to pee - unless they've been drinking beer   (io9.com) divider line 111
    More: Interesting, mammals, researchers, Zoo Atlanta, urination  
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5584 clicks; posted to Main » on 18 Oct 2013 at 8:07 PM (48 weeks ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



111 Comments   (+0 »)
   
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2013-10-18 07:44:12 PM
 
2013-10-18 08:09:33 PM
tax dollars etc.
 
2013-10-18 08:10:25 PM
Science: It's mostly useless outside of bar trivia.
 
2013-10-18 08:13:13 PM
Does this count the 90 seconds of standing there trying to get it to start?

/getting old
 
2013-10-18 08:13:32 PM
When I had an ultrasound done on my kidney, I was told to drink as much as I could possibly handle.

I literally peed full force for more than 2 full minutes after that.
 
2013-10-18 08:15:38 PM

CruJones: Does this count the 90 seconds of standing there trying to get it to start?

/getting old


I understand, TOTALLY.
 
2013-10-18 08:15:55 PM

Ennuipoet: Relevant...moronic, childish, and funny, but relevant.


I figured it was either Sandler or Ogre.
 
2013-10-18 08:18:36 PM
I knew there was something wrong with me. It seriously takes me about 8-10 seconds to get it all out, and I pee like ten times a day. Is there a bell curve for bladder size? I think mine is like in the bottom 2% of grown men.
 
2013-10-18 08:18:54 PM

HaywoodJablonski: Ennuipoet: Relevant...moronic, childish, and funny, but relevant.

I figured it was either Sandler or Ogre.


My money was on Austin Powers, fresh out of cryo.
 
2013-10-18 08:19:59 PM

SevenizGud: tax dollars etc.


thankfully there are no diseases effecting mammal urinary systems.
 
2013-10-18 08:20:33 PM
How much was the guy with the stopwatch paid?
 
2013-10-18 08:22:35 PM
Thanks Subby. Now I have to put a stop watch by the litter box to see if it's true.
 
2013-10-18 08:22:43 PM
This just isn't true.

/the pisses I saw working at a horse farm.
//I swear to you they hold it until they can make the biggest mess possible for you to clean up.
///And they shiat whenever you try and clean their hooves.
 
2013-10-18 08:23:17 PM
What about the "don't break the seal" rule?
 
2013-10-18 08:23:41 PM

uncleacid: How much was the guy with the stopwatch paid?


Madonna did it for free.

/obscure?
 
2013-10-18 08:25:04 PM
Top image: An elephant on a toilet

Thanks IO9. I needed that clarification.
 
2013-10-18 08:26:06 PM
I really want one of those elephant's giant toilets as shown in the article in my house, invite people over and casually not even mention it.
 
2013-10-18 08:32:39 PM

berylman: I really want one of those elephant's giant toilets as shown in the article in my house, invite people over and casually not even mention it.


I like your style.
 
2013-10-18 08:32:43 PM

big pig peaches: Thanks Subby. Now I have to put a stop watch by the litter box to see if it's true.


Just tried it. 49 seconds at full stream pressure; 64 seconds to complete cessation of flow. Then again, I had a full-to-bursting bladder, and I've been told more than once that I take long pees.
 
2013-10-18 08:35:41 PM
It doesn't matter how long I take to pee, I always flush the toilet too soon, and have to flush it again when I'm really done.

/Hofstadter's law
 
2013-10-18 08:36:32 PM
i.qkme.me
 
2013-10-18 08:37:06 PM
Yes, but did they "wait for the shake"?

prairiefirenews.com
 
2013-10-18 08:42:02 PM

Triumph: What about the "don't break the seal" rule?


THAT needs a scientific study. Seriously, whats the deal with that, 5 or 6 beers before i have to pee, but then once i do, its ever 20 minutes.
 
2013-10-18 08:42:03 PM

Sgt Oddball: HaywoodJablonski: Ennuipoet: Relevant...moronic, childish, and funny, but relevant.

I figured it was either Sandler or Ogre.

My money was on Austin Powers, fresh out of cryo.


I believe you mean this...
 
2013-10-18 08:43:19 PM
I've seen videos of women online that beg to differ.
 
2013-10-18 08:45:27 PM

CruJones: Does this count the 90 seconds of standing there trying to get it to start?

/getting old


Or the 5 min shaking it watching the other guys

/note this only happens at gay bars
// and airport bathrooms if you are a republican who has been elected to national office
 
2013-10-18 08:49:29 PM

Uzzah: big pig peaches: Thanks Subby. Now I have to put a stop watch by the litter box to see if it's true.

Just tried it. 49 seconds at full stream pressure; 64 seconds to complete cessation of flow. Then again, I had a full-to-bursting bladder, and I've been told more than once that I take long pees.


In the litter box? Weirdo.
 
2013-10-18 08:49:30 PM

a particular individual: It doesn't matter how long I take to pee, I always flush the toilet too soon, and have to flush it again when I'm really done.

/Hofstadter's law


Exactly how complex is taking a piss?
 
2013-10-18 08:49:56 PM
Damn, if only. I can go longer than that 9 out of 10 times. Big dude, big bladder I guess.
 
2013-10-18 08:53:59 PM

Cyno01: Triumph: What about the "don't break the seal" rule?

THAT needs a scientific study. Seriously, whats the deal with that, 5 or 6 beers before i have to pee, but then once i do, its ever 20 minutes.


Short version: alcohol is a diuretic. Also, you're peeing out the beers that you started drinking earlier.
 
2013-10-18 08:54:42 PM

TheSwizz: a particular individual: It doesn't matter how long I take to pee, I always flush the toilet too soon, and have to flush it again when I'm really done.

/Hofstadter's law

Exactly how complex is taking a piss?


When you have as many dicks as I do, it's pretty complex. All those zippers...

/My dick is so big it has its own dick, and even my dick's dick is bigger than your dick.
 
2013-10-18 08:56:02 PM

Cyno01: Triumph: What about the "don't break the seal" rule?

THAT needs a scientific study. Seriously, whats the deal with that, 5 or 6 beers before i have to pee, but then once i do, its ever 20 minutes.


http://www.nbcnews.com/health/happy-hour-urban-myth-breaking-seal-re al -thing-1B8030890?franchiseSlug=healthmain

You don't have to pee.
You start drinking.
You have to pee.
You keep drinking.
You keep having to pee.
/give me a grant
 
2013-10-18 08:57:54 PM

Ennuipoet: Relevant...moronic, childish, and funny, but relevant.


First thing I thought about. What does that say about me?
 
2013-10-18 08:59:01 PM
Piss Thread...

img703.imageshack.us
 
2013-10-18 09:02:17 PM

ongbok: Ennuipoet: Relevant...moronic, childish, and funny, but relevant.

First thing I thought about. What does that say about me?


That you once thought Adam Sandler was funny...but don't feel bad, we all did, it was the 90's and Bill Hicks was dead.
 
2013-10-18 09:04:39 PM

Ennuipoet: ongbok: Ennuipoet: Relevant...moronic, childish, and funny, but relevant.

First thing I thought about. What does that say about me?

That you once thought Adam Sandler was funny...but don't feel bad, we all did, it was the 90's and Bill Hicks was dead.


Ahh yes, the 90's. A very strange, but fun decade.
 
2013-10-18 09:04:59 PM
Good choice, subby.
/The obligatory pointer/sitter bladder size/herding behavior battle may now commence.
 
2013-10-18 09:08:36 PM
10 seconds is the usual here.

i've timed it against my toilet flush time.

i'm usually spot on.
 
2013-10-18 09:10:23 PM
Took me so long to pee this one time, I fell asleep ...
 
2013-10-18 09:13:11 PM
So I guess we know what all of those NASA scientists did during their furlough.
 
2013-10-18 09:13:55 PM
I don't know how long it takes for me to pee, but I do know that the toilet water is cold.
 
2013-10-18 09:15:43 PM

ongbok: I don't know how long it takes for me to pee, but I do know that the toilet water is cold.


Deep, too
 
2013-10-18 09:17:03 PM

a particular individual: TheSwizz: a particular individual: It doesn't matter how long I take to pee, I always flush the toilet too soon, and have to flush it again when I'm really done.

/Hofstadter's law

Exactly how complex is taking a piss?

When you have as many dicks as I do, it's pretty complex. All those zippers...

/My dick is so big it has its own dick, and even my dick's dick is bigger than your dick.


Sounds like your dick has a dick-shaped tumor.
 
2013-10-18 09:17:23 PM

a particular individual: TheSwizz: a particular individual: It doesn't matter how long I take to pee, I always flush the toilet too soon, and have to flush it again when I'm really done.

/Hofstadter's law

Exactly how complex is taking a piss?

When you have as many dicks as I do, it's pretty complex. All those zippers...

/My dick is so big it has its own dick, and even my dick's dick is bigger than your dick.


Your name isn't Dick is it? If it is, then your name does you justice. ;)
 
2013-10-18 09:20:22 PM
I take two diuretics everyday... sometimes I go at least 30 seconds. 6 TIMES A DAY!

/fark liver disease
 
2013-10-18 09:34:24 PM

Badafuco: 6 TIMES A DAY!


I wish I only peed six times a day.

I had a kidney stone at some point, so I upped my water intake to "as much as possible" and never really looked back. When I start drinking beer on top of all that water? I'm lucky to make it through a pint without a bathroom break.
 
2013-10-18 09:42:37 PM
I'm downed two Mickey's hand grenades so far, two more and I'll have a data point.
 
2013-10-18 09:44:30 PM

Uzzah: big pig peaches: Thanks Subby. Now I have to put a stop watch by the litter box to see if it's true.

Just tried it. 49 seconds at full stream pressure; 64 seconds to complete cessation of flow. Then again, I had a full-to-bursting bladder, and I've been told more than once that I take long pees.


Why were you peeing in the litterbox?
 
2013-10-18 09:49:48 PM

Tommy Moo: I knew there was something wrong with me. It seriously takes me about 8-10 seconds to get it all out, and I pee like ten times a day. Is there a bell curve for bladder size? I think mine is like in the bottom 2% of grown men.


You have diabetes
 
2013-10-18 09:50:22 PM

MFAWG: uncleacid: How much was the guy with the stopwatch paid?

Madonna did it for free.

/obscure?


Nope:  http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lD13qIlpDq8

/that's some good peeing
 
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