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(WHNS Fox 21)   Megachurch pastor gives Sunday sermon where he details how God loves us all, how his wife of 23 years became a whore with multiple affairs   (foxcarolina.com) divider line 110
    More: Dumbass, god, sermons, FOX Carolina 21, loves, multiples  
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12737 clicks; posted to Main » on 16 Oct 2013 at 8:57 PM (38 weeks ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2013-10-16 09:26:08 PM
Nice veneers, brah. Sorry about your slutty wife though. Maybe to her, church was getting plowed by other dudes. God works in mysterious ways.
 
2013-10-16 09:26:22 PM

SovietCanuckistan: If you can't see the absolute vanity and greed oozing from these people, I am starting a new, better Christianity tomorrow.
[imageshack.com image 640x478]


Dudes on the left and right? Queerer than a football bat. And the one in the middle's a tranny.
 
2013-10-16 09:27:07 PM

buzzcut73: Bslim: That there is a closeted man.

This. He's a closet case, the marriage was a sham to keep up appearances for the megachurch they were founding, she didn't want a life of celibacy (she's a preacher's wife, not a nun after all) and started getting it elsewhere.

Book it, done.


Wouldn't be surprised if she plays for the other team, either.  In that way, they had the perfect marriage of convergence.
 
2013-10-16 09:28:22 PM
So, in addition to God's love, she was spreading her legs?
did she speak in tongues or just use it?
Was there a laying on of hands?
Whips & money changers?
Theology is fascinating
 
2013-10-16 09:32:52 PM

TheDirtyNacho: The eyes, the weird foreheads.  The faces are all off.

Those aren't people, they're reptilians in human skin suits.


I'm not saying they're aliens, but ...  yeah, aliens. Walk-ins we call em. Always cracks me up to see that sign on the door of the haircut place: Walk-ins welcome. Yeh ... if you only knew.
 
2013-10-16 09:38:34 PM

TheDirtyNacho: The eyes, the weird foreheads.  The faces are all off.

Those aren't people, they're reptilians in human skin suits.


content8.flixster.com

Evil PURE AND SIMPLE by way of the Eighth Dimension!
 
2013-10-16 09:42:23 PM
So what is her telephone number, and do I need to bring my own condoms?
 
2013-10-16 09:42:43 PM
theadvocate.com

Home-schooled.
 
2013-10-16 09:44:11 PM

Hector Remarkable: Confabulat: What is a one year isolation program ?

My spider sense says he killed her.

Of course, all I did was put a spider in the microwave, and it didn't really bite me. i just kind of squished its hot carcass into my arm, started calling myself Peter and telling people I work for the Daily Bugle. As far as I know, there isn't even a real Daily Bugle.

But he killed her, I bet.


Yep, she is spread out across 3 states now
 
2013-10-16 09:45:27 PM

Confabulat: What is a one year isolation program ?


Whatever it is, it doesn't happen in my basement. I promise.
 
2013-10-16 09:46:32 PM

johnny_vegas: Hector Remarkable: Confabulat: What is a one year isolation program ?

My spider sense says he killed her.

Of course, all I did was put a spider in the microwave, and it didn't really bite me. i just kind of squished its hot carcass into my arm, started calling myself Peter and telling people I work for the Daily Bugle. As far as I know, there isn't even a real Daily Bugle.

But he killed her, I bet.

Yep, she is spread out across 3 states now


FTA it sounds like she's been spread out across states for the better part of 10 years.
 
2013-10-16 10:01:20 PM

tylerdurden217: johnny_vegas: Hector Remarkable: Confabulat: What is a one year isolation program ?

My spider sense says he killed her.

Of course, all I did was put a spider in the microwave, and it didn't really bite me. i just kind of squished its hot carcass into my arm, started calling myself Peter and telling people I work for the Daily Bugle. As far as I know, there isn't even a real Daily Bugle.

But he killed her, I bet.

Yep, she is spread out across 3 states now

FTA it sounds like she's been spread out across states for the better part of 10 years.


nice rack

/hope carpenter i mean
 
2013-10-16 10:06:50 PM
www.whaleoil.co.nz
 
2013-10-16 10:20:12 PM

HMS_Blinkin: HairBolus: "She's the one who is crazy and needs to be locked up"
[cdn.charismanews.com image 618x340]

Oh my god, that's so creepy and so funny at the same time.  I'm both lol'ing and cringing simultaneously.


I had the same reaction. The rare cringe-LOL.
 
2013-10-16 10:23:52 PM
So the pastor who runs a marriage ministry can't keep his wife happy? Big surprise! If she is an undiagnosed bi-polar woman who has affairs when manic her should FORGIVE and reconcile with her after she is treated as promises to stay on her medication.. If she's just a slut then you pastor are the problem! You can tell by the frosted plugs and the veneers that this guy is dangerously vain and insecure. Your wife discovered a taste for men secure in their manhood and YOU COULD'T HANDLE IT!
 
2013-10-16 10:26:13 PM
Not many stories give me a warm fuzzy feeling anymore.
This one does.
 
2013-10-16 10:55:19 PM
His eyes scream "axe murderer"
 
2013-10-16 10:59:25 PM
img.fark.net
the crazy...it burns.
 
2013-10-16 11:07:21 PM

some_beer_drinker: [img.fark.net image 463x660]
the crazy...it burns.


He looks gayer than three dicks in one asshole.
 
2013-10-16 11:11:07 PM
Only a matter of time before someone steps forward about Pastor Ima Rich Dipshiat having ghey sexy time with a teenager.
 
2013-10-16 11:12:07 PM
"I wouldn't want anyone anywhere to have access to her"

Fail.
 
2013-10-16 11:12:32 PM
With the kind of jack he's raking in, please please get a fashion consultant.  He dresses like a fratboy wannabe douche.  There are times to look presentable and mainstream...in the pulpit may be one them
 
2013-10-16 11:15:09 PM

GungFu: [theadvocate.com image 463x660]

Home-schooled.


I had a coworker with the exact same look, he was a crazy christian but he wasn't home home schooled, it was private school followed by Liberty University.  Yes, he was a completely nonsensical as you'd expect. I suspect this guy is on the same track.
 
2013-10-16 11:16:54 PM
www.screeninsults.com
 
2013-10-16 11:49:07 PM

Soup4Bonnie: [whns.images.worldnow.com image 640x360]

Gah! Quit staring at me!


Did someone run that pic thru Photoshop's Picasso filter?  Everything's...askew.
 
2013-10-16 11:51:22 PM
And you call yourself a rector.
 
2013-10-16 11:54:36 PM
Is it just me or
www.toonopedia.com
hot as a pistol - LowRez for your enjoyment!!
 
2013-10-16 11:56:52 PM
theadvocate.com

He looks E.L. at the end of Road Trip when he is asking for 3 fingers...
 
2013-10-17 12:05:05 AM
On Sunday during his sermon, Carpenter said his wife is in isolation in a one-year treatment program in a situation he called tragic.

Wanna bet she's warming a shallow grave?

"She totally removed herself from ministry, totally removed herself from women of Hope, she never spoke, she never preached," he said.

Perfect ministers wife?

"There were two distinct double lives. This is not a fling. Not an affair. There was a whole other life and culture and dress code and friends," explained Carpenter.

So that WAS her at Sturgis . . .

Carpenter said he doesn't plan to reconcile with Hope and went on to say he has no plans in stepping down as Senior Pastor at Redemption World Outreach.

So really the state police better check in on her.
 
2013-10-17 12:24:01 AM

jaytkay: [img.fark.net image 618x340]
[www.rwoc.org image 500x465]


Could it be Wifey's sister or stun double?

/on the interwebs
//study it out
 
2013-10-17 12:24:43 AM
Odd...I've never before seen actual humans who fell into "uncanny valley" territory.
 
2013-10-17 12:34:23 AM

buckler: Odd...I've never before seen actual humans who fell into "uncanny valley" territory.


He looks like a Fraggle.
 
2013-10-17 12:38:24 AM
Ah, our daily "It's OK to hate and ridicule this man because of his religion, while still claiming I'm tolerant" thread.
 
2013-10-17 12:50:02 AM

taurusowner: Ah, our daily "It's OK to hate and ridicule this man because of his religion, while still claiming I'm tolerant" thread.


No, it's ok to hate and ridicule him because he sounds like a controlling bastard who uses his religion as an excuse. I grew up going to a Baptist church, and NO ONE I knew there would have his kind of attitude towards their spouse.

</endrant>
 
2013-10-17 12:51:07 AM
i.imgur.com
 
2013-10-17 12:59:07 AM

Great_Milenko: it's always been my fantasy to watch my wife have sex with three black guys at once


We know.  We're sending you a tape.
 
2013-10-17 01:09:37 AM
This story brings back warm memories of the Playdoh Fuzzy Pumper Barber Shop.
 
2013-10-17 01:19:04 AM
He's the real life "Freakshow" from Harold and Kumar Go to White Castle.
 
2013-10-17 01:55:49 AM
Well, luckily they're pastors for the Redemption World Outreach. Otherwise they'd be farked. Also:
img.fark.net
That's one hell of a face.
 
2013-10-17 02:45:22 AM

CrackpipeCardozo: What kind of festering asshole makes a public spectacle of his wife's dick obsession? Not just his congregation, but the farking local news. Classy


The kind who is about to be exposed by his wife as some kind of filthy sexual deviant and wants to make it look like she's just saying it because he exposed her as a whore.
 
HBK
2013-10-17 03:37:13 AM

Confabulat: What is a one year isolation program ?


It means he murdered her.
 
2013-10-17 04:48:31 AM
Wow..It's not even Halloween..Spare us the horror show pics people..

Those people are nuttier than a rat in a tin outhouse..If they are like a lot of the other "megachurch"
televangelists, they are sociopaths. It's all about them, getting money and getting power over people.
Mr. frosted tips is in good company for being a closet case..A lot of the TV and "megachurch" preachers
are and have been. They are already leading double lives, trying to pretend to be these pious holy
rollers, when they are really just money grabbing,power mad, attention whores. Then they have this third secret life of being closet cases.
 
2013-10-17 07:23:26 AM
On the one hand, I don't wish his spouse troubles on anyone -- or take pleasure in his misfortunes. On the other hand, this just proves Xians are not immune to life, despite what they preach and pretend to believe. Most self-aggrandizing mega-church pastors are almost invariably "in the ministry" for one thing: money.

/so conflicted
 
2013-10-17 07:26:26 AM
vanity is my favorite sin
...you has it
 
2013-10-17 08:19:28 AM

assjuice: Crewmannumber6:

Reddit-like posting detected.


I don't know what that means
 
2013-10-17 09:12:43 AM

ecmoRandomNumbers: Confabulat: What is a one year isolation program ?

He's gay and he just sent his wife off to the nunnery so he gets a 1-year bachelor vacation.

Can't wait for the follow-up article.


I'm not sure sending her to a brothel is such a great way to cure her of her whoring ways...
 
2013-10-17 09:31:31 AM
Hmmm, David Miscavige's (Scientology head) wife was supposedly sent to a similar isolation program. Hasn't been heard from in years now. How convenient. Imagine if king Henry VIII had thought of this brilliant plan.
 
2013-10-17 09:40:42 AM

CrackpipeCardozo: What kind of festering asshole makes a public spectacle of his wife's dick obsession? Not just his congregation, but the farking local news. Classy


Confession is good for the soul, but only when it's your OWN sins you're confessing.
 
2013-10-17 09:56:51 AM
Maybe he hired the Stewmaker.
 
2013-10-17 10:04:02 AM
So, she "removed herself from ministry" and "never preached"? Sounds like she stopped being an asshole whereas her husband did not. She is not the badguy in this scenario.
 
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