If you can read this, either the style sheet didn't load or you have an older browser that doesn't support style sheets. Try clearing your browser cache and refreshing the page.

(Wisconsin Gazette)   Want to get married in Utah? State says you must be straight and should want to be involved in responsible procreation   (wisconsingazette.com) divider line 89
    More: Stupid, Utah, discrimination laws, Freedom to Marry, personal rights, same-sex couples  
•       •       •

5268 clicks; posted to Main » on 14 Oct 2013 at 2:12 PM (44 weeks ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



89 Comments   (+0 »)
   
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest

First | « | 1 | 2 | » | Last | Show all
 
2013-10-14 01:21:32 PM
I have a very hard time believing that straights are better than gays when it comes to responsible procreation.
 
2013-10-14 01:29:44 PM
If I get married it will have to be in Utah, as I'm already married.
 
2013-10-14 01:31:14 PM
Responsible procreation? As in, checking your mirrors and blind spots before intercourse?
 
2013-10-14 01:37:23 PM

miss diminutive: Responsible procreation? As in, checking your mirrors and blind spots before intercourse?


Also, external genitalia must be in the upright and locked position.
 
2013-10-14 01:41:59 PM

dittybopper: miss diminutive: Responsible procreation? As in, checking your mirrors and blind spots before intercourse?

Also, external genitalia must be in the upright and locked position.


Beware though, objects in mirrors can be larger than they appear.
 
2013-10-14 01:43:23 PM

miss diminutive: dittybopper: miss diminutive: Responsible procreation? As in, checking your mirrors and blind spots before intercourse?

Also, external genitalia must be in the upright and locked position.

Beware though, objects in mirrors can be larger than they appear.


Depress the clutch and ease it into gear.
 
2013-10-14 01:43:48 PM
Attorneys for the state of Utah are defending a state constitutional amendment that defines marriage as a union of a man and woman, saying it promotes the state's interest in "responsible procreation" and the "optimal mode of child-rearing."

Clearly the Mormon state doesn't pay much attention to other religions.  Catholic Priests have been trying child rearing for years and it hasn't worked out so well.
 
2013-10-14 01:49:22 PM

dittybopper: miss diminutive: dittybopper: miss diminutive: Responsible procreation? As in, checking your mirrors and blind spots before intercourse?

Also, external genitalia must be in the upright and locked position.

Beware though, objects in mirrors can be larger than they appear.

Depress the clutch and ease it into gear.


Keep pace with traffic and signal before changing positions.
 
2013-10-14 01:56:57 PM

miss diminutive: dittybopper: miss diminutive: dittybopper: miss diminutive: Responsible procreation? As in, checking your mirrors and blind spots before intercourse?

Also, external genitalia must be in the upright and locked position.

Beware though, objects in mirrors can be larger than they appear.

Depress the clutch and ease it into gear.

Keep pace with traffic and signal before changing positions.


Avoid distractions like applying make-up, shaving, or texting.
 
2013-10-14 01:56:59 PM
Want to get married in Utah?

No.
 
2013-10-14 01:58:27 PM
This is, of course, why old people and those who are sterile can't get married in Utah.
 
2013-10-14 02:00:17 PM

dittybopper: miss diminutive: dittybopper: miss diminutive: dittybopper: miss diminutive: Responsible procreation? As in, checking your mirrors and blind spots before intercourse?

Also, external genitalia must be in the upright and locked position.

Beware though, objects in mirrors can be larger than they appear.

Depress the clutch and ease it into gear.

Keep pace with traffic and signal before changing positions.

Avoid distractions like applying make-up, shaving, or texting.


Keep rear bulbs clean and functioning.
 
2013-10-14 02:04:30 PM

miss diminutive: dittybopper: miss diminutive: dittybopper: miss diminutive: dittybopper: miss diminutive: Responsible procreation? As in, checking your mirrors and blind spots before intercourse?

Also, external genitalia must be in the upright and locked position.

Beware though, objects in mirrors can be larger than they appear.

Depress the clutch and ease it into gear.

Keep pace with traffic and signal before changing positions.

Avoid distractions like applying make-up, shaving, or texting.

Keep rear bulbs clean and functioning.


Use extra caution in wet areas.
 
2013-10-14 02:08:48 PM

dittybopper: miss diminutive: dittybopper: miss diminutive: dittybopper: miss diminutive: dittybopper: miss diminutive: Responsible procreation? As in, checking your mirrors and blind spots before intercourse?

Also, external genitalia must be in the upright and locked position.

Beware though, objects in mirrors can be larger than they appear.

Depress the clutch and ease it into gear.

Keep pace with traffic and signal before changing positions.

Avoid distractions like applying make-up, shaving, or texting.

Keep rear bulbs clean and functioning.

Use extra caution in wet areas.


Brake when approaching reds.
 
2013-10-14 02:14:06 PM

miss diminutive: dittybopper: miss diminutive: dittybopper: miss diminutive: dittybopper: miss diminutive: dittybopper: miss diminutive: Responsible procreation? As in, checking your mirrors and blind spots before intercourse?

Also, external genitalia must be in the upright and locked position.

Beware though, objects in mirrors can be larger than they appear.

Depress the clutch and ease it into gear.

Keep pace with traffic and signal before changing positions.

Avoid distractions like applying make-up, shaving, or texting.

Keep rear bulbs clean and functioning.

Use extra caution in wet areas.

Brake when approaching reds.


Come to a full and complete stop. Look both ways. Count to three.
 
2013-10-14 02:14:43 PM

stpauler: I have a very hard time believing that straights are better than gays when it comes to responsible procreation.


You have a very good point. It's kinda difficult for a gay couple to accidentally get pregnant.
 
2013-10-14 02:14:52 PM

miss diminutive: dittybopper: miss diminutive: dittybopper: miss diminutive: dittybopper: miss diminutive: dittybopper: miss diminutive: Responsible procreation? As in, checking your mirrors and blind spots before intercourse?

Also, external genitalia must be in the upright and locked position.

Beware though, objects in mirrors can be larger than they appear.

Depress the clutch and ease it into gear.

Keep pace with traffic and signal before changing positions.

Avoid distractions like applying make-up, shaving, or texting.

Keep rear bulbs clean and functioning.

Use extra caution in wet areas.

Brake when approaching reds.


Recognize the futility of rushing.
 
2013-10-14 02:15:26 PM

dittybopper: If I get married it will have to be in Utah, as I'm already married.


How many wives do you want?
 
2013-10-14 02:15:45 PM

miss diminutive: dittybopper: miss diminutive: dittybopper: miss diminutive: dittybopper: miss diminutive: Responsible procreation? As in, checking your mirrors and blind spots before intercourse?

Also, external genitalia must be in the upright and locked position.

Beware though, objects in mirrors can be larger than they appear.

Depress the clutch and ease it into gear.

Keep pace with traffic and signal before changing positions.

Avoid distractions like applying make-up, shaving, or texting.

Keep rear bulbs clean and functioning.


Pull here to remove nested tree.
 
2013-10-14 02:15:52 PM

miss diminutive: dittybopper: miss diminutive: dittybopper: miss diminutive: dittybopper: miss diminutive: dittybopper: miss diminutive: Responsible procreation? As in, checking your mirrors and blind spots before intercourse?

Also, external genitalia must be in the upright and locked position.

Beware though, objects in mirrors can be larger than they appear.

Depress the clutch and ease it into gear.

Keep pace with traffic and signal before changing positions.

Avoid distractions like applying make-up, shaving, or texting.

Keep rear bulbs clean and functioning.

Use extra caution in wet areas.

Brake when approaching reds.


The "white zone" is for loading and unloading only.
 
2013-10-14 02:16:22 PM
You don't need to be straight, you just need to marry someone of the opposite sex.   Totally non-discriminatory.
 
gja [TotalFark]
2013-10-14 02:16:48 PM

miss diminutive: dittybopper: miss diminutive: Responsible procreation? As in, checking your mirrors and blind spots before intercourse?

Also, external genitalia must be in the upright and locked position.

Beware though, objects in mirrors can be larger than they appear.


I like that mirror. Can I haz?
 
2013-10-14 02:16:49 PM

Cagey B: This is, of course, why old people and those who are sterile can't get married in Utah.


I'd applaud the consistency if that was part of it
 
2013-10-14 02:16:52 PM
Why the fark would anyone want to get married in Utah anyway?
 
2013-10-14 02:16:58 PM

klaybc: miss diminutive: dittybopper: miss diminutive: dittybopper: miss diminutive: dittybopper: miss diminutive: dittybopper: miss diminutive: Responsible procreation? As in, checking your mirrors and blind spots before intercourse?

Also, external genitalia must be in the upright and locked position.

Beware though, objects in mirrors can be larger than they appear.

Depress the clutch and ease it into gear.

Keep pace with traffic and signal before changing positions.

Avoid distractions like applying make-up, shaving, or texting.

Keep rear bulbs clean and functioning.

Use extra caution in wet areas.

Brake when approaching reds.

The "white zone" is for loading and unloading only.


I think we both know what this is really about.
 
2013-10-14 02:17:13 PM

monoski: dittybopper: If I get married it will have to be in Utah, as I'm already married.

How many wives do you want?


Why, is there a sale at Macy's?
 
2013-10-14 02:19:13 PM

Smoking GNU: Why the fark would anyone want to get married in Utah anyway?


They can get a wedding-and-Mormon-conversion 2-for-1 discount.
 
2013-10-14 02:21:31 PM

dittybopper: miss diminutive: dittybopper: miss diminutive: dittybopper: miss diminutive: dittybopper: miss diminutive: dittybopper: miss diminutive: Responsible procreation? As in, checking your mirrors and blind spots before intercourse?

Also, external genitalia must be in the upright and locked position.

Beware though, objects in mirrors can be larger than they appear.

Depress the clutch and ease it into gear.

Keep pace with traffic and signal before changing positions.

Avoid distractions like applying make-up, shaving, or texting.

Keep rear bulbs clean and functioning.

Use extra caution in wet areas.

Brake when approaching reds.

Recognize the futility of rushing.


Keep hands at 10 and 2.
 
2013-10-14 02:22:20 PM
Funny how things change with just a little bit of travel time.  I got married in the state next door to Utah. (Nevada)  The only 2 things I remember being asked were "Are you currently married?" (no) and "Are you drunk?" (I was).

/12 year anniversary coming up next month.
 
2013-10-14 02:22:53 PM
Wait - so they can also deny older people remarrying or what about couples who either don't intend or are not capable of having kids?

Do you now have to do a sperm / fertility test to get married?
 
2013-10-14 02:23:28 PM
she being Brand
-new;and you
know consequently a
little stiff I was
careful of her and (having
thoroughly oiled the universal
joint tested my gas felt of
her radiator made sure her springs were O.
K.)i went right to it flooded-the-carburetor cranked her
up,slipped the
clutch (and then somehow got into reverse she
kicked what
the hell) next
minute i was back in neutral tried and
again slo-wly;bare,ly nudg.       ing(my
lev-er Right-
oh and her gears being in
A 1 shape passed
from low through
second-in-to-high like
greasedlightning) just as we turned the corner of Divinity
avenue i touched the accelerator and give
her the juice,good
                              (it
was the first ride and believe I we was
happy to see how nice and acted right up to
the last minute coming back down by the Public
Gardens I slammed on
the
internalexpanding
&
externalcontracting
breaks Bothatonce and
brought allofher tremB
-ling
to a:dead.
stand-
;Still)

     --e. e. cummings
 
2013-10-14 02:25:49 PM

gnosis301: dittybopper: miss diminutive: dittybopper: miss diminutive: dittybopper: miss diminutive: dittybopper: miss diminutive: dittybopper: miss diminutive: Responsible procreation? As in, checking your mirrors and blind spots before intercourse?

Also, external genitalia must be in the upright and locked position.

Beware though, objects in mirrors can be larger than they appear.

Depress the clutch and ease it into gear.

Keep pace with traffic and signal before changing positions.

Avoid distractions like applying make-up, shaving, or texting.

Keep rear bulbs clean and functioning.

Use extra caution in wet areas.

Brake when approaching reds.

Recognize the futility of rushing.

Keep hands at 10 and 2.


Don't tailgate, it's dangerous.
 
2013-10-14 02:28:48 PM
Is Utah going to ban married people from elective vasectomies or tubal ligations too?
 
2013-10-14 02:29:08 PM
Nothing would make me happier then for the courts to force Utah to allow gay marriage.  It would be the worst thing to happen to those bigots since the Supreme Court told them they could only have one wife at a time.
 
2013-10-14 02:30:23 PM
Republicans are against the government getting involved in personal contracts.
Unless it's marriage of course.
 
2013-10-14 02:32:32 PM

wxboy: gnosis301: dittybopper: miss diminutive: dittybopper: miss diminutive: dittybopper: miss diminutive: dittybopper: miss diminutive: dittybopper: miss diminutive: Responsible procreation? As in, checking your mirrors and blind spots before intercourse?

Also, external genitalia must be in the upright and locked position.

Beware though, objects in mirrors can be larger than they appear.

Depress the clutch and ease it into gear.

Keep pace with traffic and signal before changing positions.

Avoid distractions like applying make-up, shaving, or texting.

Keep rear bulbs clean and functioning.

Use extra caution in wet areas.

Brake when approaching reds.

Recognize the futility of rushing.

Keep hands at 10 and 2.

Don't tailgate, it's dangerous.


Come and see the violence inherent in the system.
 
2013-10-14 02:34:55 PM
Oh, this will bite them on the ass. I'm a straight chick. I'm also surgically sterile. So if I got married, am I suddenly not married anymore in Utah?

/single
 
2013-10-14 02:35:53 PM

gnosis301: dittybopper: miss diminutive: dittybopper: miss diminutive: dittybopper: miss diminutive: dittybopper: miss diminutive: dittybopper: miss diminutive: Responsible procreation? As in, checking your mirrors and blind spots before intercourse?

Also, external genitalia must be in the upright and locked position.

Beware though, objects in mirrors can be larger than they appear.

Depress the clutch and ease it into gear.

Keep pace with traffic and signal before changing positions.

Avoid distractions like applying make-up, shaving, or texting.

Keep rear bulbs clean and functioning.

Use extra caution in wet areas.

Brake when approaching reds.

Recognize the futility of rushing.

Keep hands at 10 and 2.


Identify.  Predict.  Decide.  Execute.
 
2013-10-14 02:38:30 PM
It's stuff like this that reaffirms why the government should not be involved in marriage at all.

Who and how you love is none of their damn business.
 
2013-10-14 02:38:34 PM

Duck_of_Doom: gnosis301: dittybopper: miss diminutive: dittybopper: miss diminutive: dittybopper: miss diminutive: dittybopper: miss diminutive: dittybopper: miss diminutive: Responsible procreation? As in, checking your mirrors and blind spots before intercourse?

Also, external genitalia must be in the upright and locked position.

Beware though, objects in mirrors can be larger than they appear.

Depress the clutch and ease it into gear.

Keep pace with traffic and signal before changing positions.

Avoid distractions like applying make-up, shaving, or texting.

Keep rear bulbs clean and functioning.

Use extra caution in wet areas.

Brake when approaching reds.

Recognize the futility of rushing.

Keep hands at 10 and 2.

Identify.  Predict.  Decide.  Execute.


Get inside her OODA loop.
 
gja [TotalFark]
2013-10-14 02:39:35 PM

wxboy: gnosis301: dittybopper: miss diminutive: dittybopper: miss diminutive: dittybopper: miss diminutive: dittybopper: miss diminutive: dittybopper: miss diminutive: Responsible procreation? As in, checking your mirrors and blind spots before intercourse?

Also, external genitalia must be in the upright and locked position.

Beware though, objects in mirrors can be larger than they appear.

Depress the clutch and ease it into gear.

Keep pace with traffic and signal before changing positions.

Avoid distractions like applying make-up, shaving, or texting.

Keep rear bulbs clean and functioning.

Use extra caution in wet areas.

Brake when approaching reds.

Recognize the futility of rushing.

Keep hands at 10 and 2.

Don't tailgate, it's dangerous.


No bum-rushing?

Dammit! Never could get a gal to let me use the trunk.
 
2013-10-14 02:39:41 PM

dittybopper: monoski: dittybopper: If I get married it will have to be in Utah, as I'm already married.

How many wives do you want?

Why, is there a sale at Macy's?


If the answer is more than one, Utah is state for you.
Bonus = You must be at least 15 years old to be married in Utah.
 
2013-10-14 02:40:39 PM
The state further argues the case is "really about who decides, not who is right in this important policy debate," and that Amendment 3 does not discriminate because "neither a man nor a woman may marry a person of the same sex."

So then laws forbidding people marrying different races is not discriminator either then? (that's not what the SCOTUS said)
 
2013-10-14 02:46:34 PM
Responsible what now?

img.fark.net
 
2013-10-14 02:49:05 PM

GoodOmens: Wait - so they can also deny older people remarrying or what about couples who either don't intend or are not capable of having kids?

Do you now have to do a sperm / fertility test to get married?


Come to Arizona, where the answer is yes (if you want to marry your first cousin).
 
2013-10-14 02:50:38 PM
upload.wikimedia.org

'ello.  What's going on in this thread?
 
2013-10-14 02:52:57 PM

wxboy: gnosis301: dittybopper: miss diminutive: dittybopper: miss diminutive: dittybopper: miss diminutive: dittybopper: miss diminutive: dittybopper: miss diminutive: Responsible procreation? As in, checking your mirrors and blind spots before intercourse?

Also, external genitalia must be in the upright and locked position.

Beware though, objects in mirrors can be larger than they appear.

Depress the clutch and ease it into gear.

Keep pace with traffic and signal before changing positions.

Avoid distractions like applying make-up, shaving, or texting.

Keep rear bulbs clean and functioning.

Use extra caution in wet areas.

Brake when approaching reds.

Recognize the futility of rushing.

Keep hands at 10 and 2.

Don't tailgate, it's dangerous.


Take traffic into account when determining how long it will take to reach your destination.
 
2013-10-14 02:53:16 PM
I've always thought it funny about how some people view sex.

First they say "You're not animals, you can control your sexual urges and not have sex until you're married".
Then when you're married they say "all sex is for pro-creation only".....which is what animals do.........

So what are we, animals or humans?!

I'm a 48 year old widow and empty nester.  I will be marrying again and I'll be DAMNED if we are going to be having any children!  Marriage is more than just about children.

/am a human animal, rawrrrrrrr
 
2013-10-14 02:54:31 PM
"Same-sex couples, who cannot procreate, do not promote the state's interests in responsible procreation (regardless of whether they harm it)," the state argues.

Hmm, that sounds familiar. Let's ask Heinrich:

nseuropa.files.wordpress.com

I would like to go over with you a couple of ideas on the issue of homosexuality. Among the homosexuals there are those who take the view: what I do is nobody else's business, it is a purely private matter. However, all things which happen in the sexual sphere are not the private affair of the individual, but impinge upon the life and death of the nation and mean world power or swissification. A people which has many children has the qualifications for world power and world domination. A people of good race which has too few children has a sure ticket for the grave, for insignificance in 50 to 100 years, for burial in two hundred and fifty years.

Also:

Rudolf Diels, the founder of the Gestapo, recorded some of Hitler's personal thoughts on the subject: "He lectured me on the role of homosexuality in history and politics. It had destroyed ancient Greece, he said. Once rife, it extended its contagious effects like an ineluctable law of nature to the best and most manly of characters, eliminating from the reproductive process precisely those men on whose offspring a nation depended. The immediate result of the vice was, however, that unnatural passion swiftly became dominant in public affairs if it were allowed to spread unchecked."
 
2013-10-14 02:58:09 PM

dittybopper: If I get married it will have to be in Utah, as I'm already married.


very...nicely.....done.
 
Displayed 50 of 89 comments

First | « | 1 | 2 | » | Last | Show all

View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest


This thread is closed to new comments.

Continue Farking
Submit a Link »





Report