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(CBS DC)   "If ands or buts were candy and nuts, then every day would be Christmas." -John Boehner. I don't quite know how to respond to this   (washington.cbslocal.com) divider line 94
    More: Interesting, Boehner, Obama, Treasury Secretary Jack Lew, Investment Company Institute, Fidelity Investments, Treasury bill, commercial paper, House Republicans  
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1129 clicks; posted to Politics » on 10 Oct 2013 at 2:23 PM (44 weeks ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2013-10-10 12:02:19 PM
I think John is starting to lose it
 
2013-10-10 12:03:30 PM
Sounds like Boehner likes nuts and butts.
 
2013-10-10 12:10:01 PM
Boehner is going to lost his shiat if this keeps up much longer.
 
2013-10-10 12:19:37 PM
He sounds "ginned up".
 
2013-10-10 12:23:42 PM
I guess when they were handing out brains, Boehner thought they said "trains" and said, "I'll wait for the next one."
 
2013-10-10 12:27:51 PM
"It's time for leadership," Boehner said. "It's time for these negotiations and this conversation to begin."

GOP aides tell CBS News that Boehner will present a "clean" bill to Obama that is free of any policy conditions which would raise the borrowing limit for six weeks to allow for more negotiations.


Remember, before it wasn't time for leadership. That's my take away from this.

Obama, turn him down. 6 weeks? Really? No. Just ... no.
 
2013-10-10 12:29:21 PM
oh God, John's off the wagon!
 
2013-10-10 12:30:32 PM
Lord Boehner: There has been too much violence. Too much pain. But I have an honorable compromise. Just walk away. Give me your pump, the oil, the gasoline, and the whole compound, and I'll spare your lives. Just walk away and we'll give you a safe passageway in the wastelands. Just walk away and there will be an end to the horror.
 
2013-10-10 12:33:32 PM
Orange Boner tucked his nuts up his butt? What?
 
2013-10-10 12:34:34 PM
Yeah, and if wishes were horses, every beggar would have two in the hand not one in the bush.  Although that may be a bad thing now that I think about it.
 
2013-10-10 12:36:14 PM
The President better tell them to go f*ck themselves.
 
2013-10-10 12:37:54 PM
If ands and buts were gin and tonic, it'd be Happy Hour all the time
 
2013-10-10 12:38:27 PM
Jesus. Sounds like he had some pretty sh*tty Christmases as a kid. Maybe that's why he turned into an sobbing orange alcoholic.
 
2013-10-10 12:45:44 PM
How about in exchange for a CR and a permanent debt ceiling raise, Obama gives him 70B in structural SS and Medicare reforms.

You know- THE DEAL THAT BOEHNER SAID YES TO BACK IN JULY, BEFORE RENEGGING.
 
2013-10-10 12:51:48 PM

sigdiamond2000: Jesus. Sounds like he had some pretty sh*tty Christmases as a kid. Maybe that's why he turned into an sobbing orange alcoholic.


"I spent my childhood in tanning salons, as my mother loved that. By the time I was in the 3rd grade, someone thought I was a real life Oompa-Lompa. I hated Roald Dahl with a passion. I met Gene Wilder once, and told him I loved him in Blazing Saddles...he looked at me, wide-eyed and exclaimed 'Holy Methuselah! One of them escaped the factory!' I actually liked the movie, it's a secret love of mine. I watched it every sunday once I came to Congress. Willy Wonka and scotch could make Newt Gingrich farking bearable. When Ted Cruz came to me a couple of months ago asking about Obamacare funding, well...I was trying to sober up before the next round of budget talks started and he begged and pleaded with me to let the government shut down. I, shamefully, let him. I was never more sloshed on the floor than that night when we were all awaiting the shut down to start. Later that week, we all gathered round and had a luncheon with Cruz. We biatched at him until our faces were red over all the shiat we now had to pick up because of him. He held fast. I'll give him that. And maybe it was the fact that I was on my 3rd bottle of scotch that morning, but I remember just standing up. The room had fallen silent. I walked over to him, our faces were level, noses barely touching (he had the most punchable face...and I hang around Cantor most days) and I just...I just started singing a tune...

Oompa-Loompa derpity do,
I've got another puzzle for you,
Oopma-Loompa, herpity dee,
If you were wise, then you'll listen to me.

What do you get when Ted Cruz is an ass?
Lots of flak and a boatload of sass,
What would you do if you had him in the room?
Wouldn't you just make his head...go...boom?
I don't like the look of this...

I swear, Ted shiat his pants then and there"

-excerpt from Boehner's new memoir "Orange you glad I went with plaid?"
 
2013-10-10 01:02:25 PM

Nadie_AZ: Obama, turn him down. 6 weeks? Really? No. Just ... no.


Maybe by signing a six week deal they'll get accustomed to doing their jobs.  And a clean CR, no matter how short, will be seen as traitorous by the nilhists controlling the House.  Boehner might be finished.  The GOP would nominate the nuttiest nut they could nut as Speaker, and Obama will completely ignore their screaming next time.  He'll be able to say they're nuts, and even CNN will have a hard time disagreeing.
 
2013-10-10 01:10:54 PM

somedude210: sigdiamond2000: Jesus. Sounds like he had some pretty sh*tty Christmases as a kid. Maybe that's why he turned into an sobbing orange alcoholic.

"I spent my childhood in tanning salons, as my mother loved that. By the time I was in the 3rd grade, someone thought I was a real life Oompa-Lompa. I hated Roald Dahl with a passion. I met Gene Wilder once, and told him I loved him in Blazing Saddles...he looked at me, wide-eyed and exclaimed 'Holy Methuselah! One of them escaped the factory!' I actually liked the movie, it's a secret love of mine. I watched it every sunday once I came to Congress. Willy Wonka and scotch could make Newt Gingrich farking bearable. When Ted Cruz came to me a couple of months ago asking about Obamacare funding, well...I was trying to sober up before the next round of budget talks started and he begged and pleaded with me to let the government shut down. I, shamefully, let him. I was never more sloshed on the floor than that night when we were all awaiting the shut down to start. Later that week, we all gathered round and had a luncheon with Cruz. We biatched at him until our faces were red over all the shiat we now had to pick up because of him. He held fast. I'll give him that. And maybe it was the fact that I was on my 3rd bottle of scotch that morning, but I remember just standing up. The room had fallen silent. I walked over to him, our faces were level, noses barely touching (he had the most punchable face...and I hang around Cantor most days) and I just...I just started singing a tune...

Oompa-Loompa derpity do,
I've got another puzzle for you,
Oopma-Loompa, herpity dee,
If you were wise, then you'll listen to me.

What do you get when Ted Cruz is an ass?
Lots of flak and a boatload of sass,
What would you do if you had him in the room?
Wouldn't you just make his head...go...boom?
I don't like the look of this...

I swear, Ted shiat his pants then and there"

-excerpt from Boehner's new memoir "Orange you glad I went with plaid?"


Nice.
 
2013-10-10 01:10:56 PM
If tears were beers, you'd be set Boner.
 
2013-10-10 01:11:31 PM
If clues were shoes the GOP would be barefoot.
 
2013-10-10 01:13:43 PM
FTFA:

Boehner is calling on Obama to negotiate the reopening of the federal government in an effort to go forward with the debt ceiling proposal.

In other words, negotiate now before the second round of extortion.
 
2013-10-10 01:15:00 PM

Marcus Aurelius: Nadie_AZ: Obama, turn him down. 6 weeks? Really? No. Just ... no.

Maybe by signing a six week deal they'll get accustomed to doing their jobs.  And a clean CR, no matter how short, will be seen as traitorous by the nilhists controlling the House.  Boehner might be finished.  The GOP would nominate the nuttiest nut they could nut as Speaker, and Obama will completely ignore their screaming next time.  He'll be able to say they're nuts, and even CNN will have a hard time disagreeing.


They'll amp up the crazy if he does this. We both know it. They'll be furious they had no concessions and demand double the concessions.

The Republican factions leading the war on Obamacare, the federal government shutdown-and attacking other Democratic priorities such as preserving safety nets, expanding civil rights and regulating big business-are going to become more extreme and intransigent, top Democratic pollsters have concluded.

Link
I say push em til the GOP bails on them and shuns them. The fight isn't Us v Them, Obama v House or Repub v Dem. It is GOP v GOP. And until that battle is over, we'll never get anywhere. It is happening and has to happen. Sadly (and gladly) the default is going to cause one side or the other to capitulate. One will work with Obama and the Dems, the other won't. We know who is going to lose, but they have to actually lose first.
 
2013-10-10 01:21:45 PM

Nadie_AZ: We know who is going to lose, but they have to actually lose first.


The price we pay as a country is going to be huge.
 
2013-10-10 01:26:27 PM

NewportBarGuy: Nadie_AZ: We know who is going to lose, but they have to actually lose first.

The price we pay as a country is going to be huge.


Imagine the Terminator. Can't be reasoned with? Doesn't care? Yeah, that's them. How do you stop them? Pipe bomb and heavy duty metal press? Drop them in liquid magma?

Come to think of it that might be entertaining ....
 
2013-10-10 01:27:13 PM
How do they expect Obama to square "debt cieling is non-negotiable" with "new debt cieling negotiations in 6 weeks?"
 
2013-10-10 01:39:54 PM

doyner: How do they expect Obama to square "debt cieling is non-negotiable" with "new debt cieling negotiations in 6 weeks?"


If they pass a clean debt ceiling increase, even for just 6 weeks, Obama should take it.  It doesn't mean that the Democrats will have to make any concessions to the GOP in the negotiations they want, they're just agreeing to sit down and talk, I can respect that.

Six weeks will give Obama enough time to find a work around for the problem if it turns out that the GOP's is unwilling to negotiate in good faith in their proposed talks, which, I fear, is likely.
 
2013-10-10 01:41:42 PM

doyner: How do they expect Obama to square "debt cieling is non-negotiable" with "new debt cieling negotiations in 6 weeks?"


Because no one has made a decision, so it doesn't count!

This kind of reasoning led to the sequester.  Kick the can down the road, but when it comes time to catch it, no one is there.
 
2013-10-10 01:42:56 PM
There once was a man from Nantucket...
 
2013-10-10 01:48:48 PM

somedude210: I think John is starting to lose it


Starting????
 
2013-10-10 01:50:50 PM
I think he's starting to drink before breakfast now.  Either that or he's got an IV of Jim Beam we're not seeing.
 
2013-10-10 01:55:14 PM
i.imgur.com
 
2013-10-10 01:55:21 PM

NewportBarGuy: Lord Boehner: There has been too much violence. Too much pain. But I have an honorable compromise. Just walk away. Give me your pump, the oil, the gasoline, and the whole compound, and I'll spare your lives. Just walk away and we'll give you a safe passageway in the wastelands. Just walk away and there will be an end to the horror.


Winnar.
 
2013-10-10 01:56:31 PM

doyner: How do they expect Obama to square "debt cieling is non-negotiable" with "new debt cieling negotiations in 6 weeks?"


6 more weeks of people getting signed up for Obamacare - which looks to be off the table now anyway, it's back to deficit./debt reduction (which is only important when a blah man is President)
 
2013-10-10 02:08:29 PM

Dubya's_Coke_Dealer: doyner: How do they expect Obama to square "debt cieling is non-negotiable" with "new debt cieling negotiations in 6 weeks?"

6 more weeks of people getting signed up for Obamacare - which looks to be off the table now anyway, it's back to deficit./debt reduction (which is only important when a blah man is President)


I don't know... I think he's kind of exciting.
 
2013-10-10 02:18:43 PM
Ive heard that saying as, "if ands and buts were clusters of nuts, we'd all have a bowl of granola"
 
2013-10-10 02:20:02 PM
Insist on it being ten weeks from today.  No more, no less.  Let the GOP try to make the country default one week from Christmas.  Obama can just sit there and smile.  "Hey, most of y'all think I'm Muslim anyway, so why would I give a shiat about Christmas?  Ramadan's over, man."
 
2013-10-10 02:26:07 PM

vernonFL: Ive heard that saying as, "if ands and buts were clusters of nuts, we'd all have a bowl of granola"


If ifs and buts were wishes and nuts...you'd still be a fruitcake?
 
2013-10-10 02:27:03 PM

Dubya's_Coke_Dealer: it's back to deficit./debt reduction


But if they don't wreck Obamacare, they won't have as much of those things to complain about...
 
2013-10-10 02:28:37 PM
If geezers and stoners had trustworthy boners, then every day would be your mom's birthday.
 
2013-10-10 02:28:52 PM
You know a politician has run out of talking points when he starts quoting his grandmother.
 
2013-10-10 02:29:05 PM
deadhomersociety.files.wordpress.com

"If if's and but's were candy and nuts..." eh, how does the rest of that go?

/First thing I thought of.
 
2013-10-10 02:29:07 PM
This was one of those where you click on it thinking, "He didn't really say that". Damned if he didn't. Will he start quoting Pokemon next?
 
2013-10-10 02:29:13 PM

NutWrench: I guess when they were handing out brains, Boehner thought they said "trains" and said, "I'll wait for the next one."



And when they were passing out noses he thought they said "roses" and he said "I'd like a big orange one!"
 
2013-10-10 02:30:13 PM
With Boehner in charge, the 2014 elections are going to be Christmas time for the Democrats.
 
2013-10-10 02:31:31 PM
He continued, "... and if my aunt had balls, I'd drink 15 more Glenlivets."
 
2013-10-10 02:31:47 PM
This is a headlong drive away from the battlefront with white flags being waved as they run screaming for the rear.

The GOP has blinked and we're seeing the end of this current mess.  Obama broke em.

The Freepers are confused.  Half of them are losing their minds with rage and grief, while the other half are sure that this is some sort of intricate political trick that they don't understand, but are still sure is there, waiting to catch Obama in some sort of tiger trap.
 
2013-10-10 02:32:24 PM

vernonFL: Ive heard that saying as, "if ands and buts were clusters of nuts, we'd all have a bowl of granola"


I imagine that's what he was going for. What he said makes no sense.
 
2013-10-10 02:32:31 PM
I almost choked on my trail mix when I read this headline.
 
2013-10-10 02:32:34 PM

Kibbler: If geezers and stoners had trustworthy boners, then every day would be your mom's birthday.


*swish*
 
2013-10-10 02:32:39 PM
I have the saddest boner right now.
 
2013-10-10 02:33:02 PM

Uranus Is Huge!: He continued, "... and if my aunt had balls, I'd drink 15 more Glenlivets."


Because she doesn't, he'll drink 20.
 
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