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(Visual News)   If you don't want to live with this girl after this Craigslist ad, I don't understand you   (visualnews.com) divider line 137
    More: Amusing, Craigslist, roommates, young professional  
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38484 clicks; posted to Main » on 09 Oct 2013 at 2:21 PM (41 weeks ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



137 Comments   (+0 »)
   
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest
 
2013-10-09 02:25:08 PM
Hipster?  No thanks.
 
2013-10-09 02:25:28 PM
Will she let me hook up my play station and spend hours and hours on the couch?
 
2013-10-09 02:25:34 PM
A bit on the creepy side, no?
 
2013-10-09 02:26:09 PM
She sounds exhausting
 
2013-10-09 02:27:50 PM
Hmmm... Ad doesn't seem to mention if she's into casual beej.
 
2013-10-09 02:27:53 PM
Nope nope nope.
 
2013-10-09 02:28:18 PM
I'll let her live with me, oh yeah.

/Come on, girl where are you going?  Was it something I said?  Wait, come back, don't be like this.  I can change!
 
2013-10-09 02:29:21 PM
Ad doesn't feature the critical landlord quote: "She never missed rent and didn't trash the place with clove-cigarettes and drunken hipster douchebag guests."

I don't really care what the cast of "Girls" thinks about her.
 
2013-10-09 02:29:40 PM
I want to live with her based on the picture alone.  F*ck the words, if she can attract sculpted naked men to between her legs, I'm in.
 
2013-10-09 02:29:47 PM

CruJones: She sounds exhausting


This.  I dated a Lauren type once, it was exhausting.  And it was amazing that someone who talked about themselves so much, she had very few stories.  So you get to hear the same ones over and over.
 
2013-10-09 02:29:50 PM
It's not strange that she has had so many roommates?  Testimonials are nice, but the turnover seems to be a big issue for some reason.
 
2013-10-09 02:29:50 PM

CruJones: She sounds exhausting


It also sounds like she needs constant praising and reassurance.
 
2013-10-09 02:30:49 PM
I would have to see her ass.

I don't like a frumpy in the dumper.
 
2013-10-09 02:30:51 PM
I'm suing Lauren for using my picture without permission.
 
2013-10-09 02:31:13 PM

tuna fingers: Hmmm... Ad doesn't seem to mention if she's into casual beej.


Look at her Twitter profile pic and make that decision for yourself. (gotta RTFA)
 
2013-10-09 02:32:20 PM
Ironic naked man?
 
2013-10-09 02:32:38 PM
Well she's apparently good at cooking and will cook for you. I like that, and the cleanness is a plus. Not a big fan of the excessive self-congratulation of it all though. I also am not fond of the idea of having a girl roommate. Or a guy roommate. I would rather pay twice the rent than deal with a roommate again (I've never even argued with roommates before, I just always secretly hate them for being in MY home)
 
2013-10-09 02:32:45 PM

highendmighty: It's not strange that she has had so many roommates?  Testimonials are nice, but the turnover seems to be a big issue for some reason.


Meh, she can move in with me. I have a fully furnished dungeon, I mean apartment, in the basement. Shower, sink, stove, St. Andrews Cross, spanking bench, and swing all included.
 
2013-10-09 02:32:46 PM

trucktrash: tuna fingers: Hmmm... Ad doesn't seem to mention if she's into casual beej.

Look at her Twitter profile pic and make that decision for yourself. (gotta RTFA)


post pic for those of us at work.
 
2013-10-09 02:33:03 PM
Might as well say, "Turn your life into a television sitcom!"
 
2013-10-09 02:33:12 PM
Attention whore. Thinks world revolves around herself.
 
2013-10-09 02:33:36 PM
She may have impeccable taste but her designs skills suck. She's the Powerpoint of friends.
 
2013-10-09 02:33:37 PM
She can make scrambled eggs, can she also boil water?
 
2013-10-09 02:33:46 PM
definitely not neurotic = neurotic as a motherf*cker.
 
2013-10-09 02:34:01 PM
I don't care what "Daphna" and "Neiki" think.  They never get my coffee order correct.
 
2013-10-09 02:35:30 PM
She sounds annoying.  I'm guessing she's trying to "make it" in graphic design.  She'd probably pester you constantly about anything and everything and since she "makes awesome mac and cheese" and "always shares" I'm guessing she NEEDS you to eat her food and tell her how awesome it is.

/I make good curry.
//fulfil me with your "mmm" sounds.
 
2013-10-09 02:35:42 PM
Copy paste for the work firewall challenged?
 
2013-10-09 02:35:56 PM

CruJones: She sounds exhausting


Yeah that's my impression.

The best room mate I ever was the stoner who played WoW all the time.  Living with him was pretty much the same as removing one bedroom from your apartment, cutting the rent in half and getting a free upgrade for the internet package.  The only sings we ever saw of him were the occasional pizza delivery and a faint aroma of pot on the balcony. It was like living with an overweight,  slightly flatulent ninja.
 
2013-10-09 02:36:00 PM

theflatline: trucktrash: tuna fingers: Hmmm... Ad doesn't seem to mention if she's into casual beej.

Look at her Twitter profile pic and make that decision for yourself. (gotta RTFA)

post pic for those of us at work.


si0.twimg.com
 
2013-10-09 02:36:20 PM
So there are six people who don't live with her anymore, I wonder why?
 
2013-10-09 02:37:58 PM
I don't want to live with her, but I wouldn't mind adopting her. That's my plan to have people to take care of me when I'm old. Adopt a competent young adult. You get grandkids, and never have to change a diaper/bail out a troubled teen.
 
2013-10-09 02:38:20 PM

blatz514: theflatline: trucktrash: tuna fingers: Hmmm... Ad doesn't seem to mention if she's into casual beej.

Look at her Twitter profile pic and make that decision for yourself. (gotta RTFA)

post pic for those of us at work.

[si0.twimg.com image 500x500]


This could work!
 
2013-10-09 02:39:00 PM
Seems needy...I'll pass
 
2013-10-09 02:39:12 PM

Slaves2Darkness: highendmighty: It's not strange that she has had so many roommates?  Testimonials are nice, but the turnover seems to be a big issue for some reason.

Meh, she can move in with me. I have a fully furnished dungeon, I mean apartment, in the basement. Shower, sink, stove, St. Andrews Cross, spanking bench, and swing all included.


Wait, do I know you?
 
2013-10-09 02:39:39 PM
Did anyone else stare at 2 chicks in bikinis and then find Waldo the NSFW "ironic naked man" ?  Was that a test?
 
2013-10-09 02:39:42 PM

GooberMcFly: I want to live with her based on the picture alone.  F*ck the words, if she can attract sculpted naked men to between her legs, I'm in.


How hard could that be?

/admittedly I've never tried to
 
2013-10-09 02:40:22 PM
How bout no?
 
2013-10-09 02:40:27 PM
What is this word I see used so much?  Ironic? What does it mean? Ironic?

Ironic naked man in the background?

So Ironic means random...
 
2013-10-09 02:40:53 PM
Is this not the chick that used to be fat on "friends"?
 
2013-10-09 02:41:18 PM
I'd sleep with her but I'm gonna have to say no on the roommate thing.
 
2013-10-09 02:41:44 PM

kiroh: A bit on the creepy side, no?


I was going to say: ATTENTION WHORE!!

But maybe I'm just misreading her. I volunteer to check her out, thoroughly
 
2013-10-09 02:42:29 PM
well.  if i were to get a new roommate, i would look for the following:

1) committed relationship with someone else who lives alone

2) works a lot (80 hours or more per week)
 
2013-10-09 02:42:52 PM
Best roommate ad:

"I'm never there, but I pay my share of the rent on time."
 
2013-10-09 02:42:58 PM
I have had cheerful roommates who talk a lot and can cook.  I'm a'ight with that. It's the moody, depressive types who leave the sink full of dishes that I got tired of.
 
2013-10-09 02:44:10 PM
The ad is obviously fake.  I can tell by the picture:

i105.photobucket.com
There's no way that could be me.  I'd never look that good in a two piece.
 
2013-10-09 02:44:24 PM

Gaseous Anomaly: GooberMcFly: I want to live with her based on the picture alone.  F*ck the words, if she can attract sculpted naked men to between her legs, I'm in.

How hard could that be?

/admittedly I've never tried to


Pretty easy, actually - unless you're a man. Then, it's a little more difficult (but not impossible).
 
2013-10-09 02:45:41 PM

Agnes Gonxha's Confidant: What is this word I see used so much?  Ironic? What does it mean? Ironic?

Ironic naked man in the background?

So Ironic means random...


don't get me started.  Ironic in the Hipster sense usually means "opposite" or "purposely contradictory for attention", but in this pic it's "random" as you say, and still completely misused.  Fark doesn't need more reasons to dislike hipsters and all they stand for.  Why do they make it so easy?!!!
 
2013-10-09 02:45:49 PM
The use of every font except Comic Sans tells me everything I need to know.
 
2013-10-09 02:45:51 PM

vudukungfu: Is this not the chick that used to be fat on "friends"?


Ha, she's on my TV screen right now, because Cougar Town is on for some reason. Funny thing is her face isn't the most farked up via surgery one on this show. Kate from Drew Carey looks like a weird mannequin.
 
2013-10-09 02:46:39 PM

Nadie_AZ: Ironic naked man?


Well, were you expecting a naked man to be in the background of the picture?
 
2013-10-09 02:49:52 PM
Gotta see if she is on time with the rent. Cause the slug that lives on the couch right now is 9 days late. But I am digging the cooking and cleaning part. Now will she point out and hook me up with her sleazy friends? Because my current roomate hated when I did that.
 
2013-10-09 02:49:57 PM
How does she feel about filling 90% of the fridge space with beer, being consistently late on the rent and spending the better part of my day playing XBox? Oh, and fapping. Lots of fapping at all hours of the day.
 
2013-10-09 02:50:54 PM
I don't have a pony in this race but I'll point out that not everyone has roommates one at a time. Some people share a house with 6 people (*cough* college *cough*).
 
2013-10-09 02:52:57 PM

Gecko Gingrich: Nadie_AZ: Ironic naked man?

Well, were you expecting a naked man to be in the background of the picture?


Well, if its on Fark, yes.
 
2013-10-09 02:55:40 PM
If she is that great why hasn't she managed to land a husband yet?

Also super trendy is not a good thing.
 
2013-10-09 02:56:16 PM

Egoy3k: CruJones: She sounds exhausting

Yeah that's my impression.

The best room mate I ever was the stoner who played WoW all the time.  Living with him was pretty much the same as removing one bedroom from your apartment, cutting the rent in half and getting a free upgrade for the internet package.  The only sings we ever saw of him were the occasional pizza delivery and a faint aroma of pot on the balcony. It was like living with an overweight,  slightly flatulent ninja.


I've almost been that guy before and yeah, my roommates loved me. I played video games in my room all the time, had an uncle who supervised Nabisco plants and would regularly give me huge boxes full of cookies that I don't eat, I BBQ'd all the time and was happy to share, fixed problems around the house so we wouldn't need to wait weeks for our landlord to find some distant relative to do it... etc. One of my roomies even had a baby when we shared a place and I'm such a deep sleeper I didn't lose a wink of sleep. Heck even my GF (now my wife) was sweet and unobtrusive... sometimes she'd chill with the ladies upstairs (I did the Jack Tripper thing for years with 2 female roomies) most of the time she'd hang with me in my room.
 
GBB
2013-10-09 02:56:35 PM

highendmighty: It's not strange that she has had so many roommates?  Testimonials are nice, but the turnover seems to be a big issue for some reason.


Suicides
 
2013-10-09 02:56:54 PM
Unless it's a friends with benifits type situation, I wouldn't have the time to dedicate to a girl like that.... to much training required.
1. Mac and Cheese isn't food and does not add to a cooking resume. Learn to cook some real food and get back to me. A woman sacred of tackling the grill and some 14oz Rib Eye Steaks need not apply.
2. Saying you are tidy means jack shiat. Saying you can press my shirts and pants for me and have suit jackets dry cleaned for me means something.
3. Display some real skills if you are going to use the term housewife, otherwise you are insulting woman who can actually manage a household.


Of course if she can make a decent Martini and Tom Collins we could have something to start with.
 
2013-10-09 02:57:16 PM

mcreadyblue: Gecko Gingrich: Nadie_AZ: Ironic naked man?

Well, were you expecting a naked man to be in the background of the picture?

Well, if its on Fark, yes.


Okay, maybe I'm missing the joke, here, but everyone actually sees the naked man in the background of the picture, right?
 
2013-10-09 02:57:24 PM

DubyaHater: How does she feel about filling 90% of the fridge space with beer, being consistently late on the rent and spending the better part of my day playing XBox? Oh, and fapping. Lots of fapping at all hours of the day.


And the freezer being 90% full of pizzas.  And I'm not cleaning the pubes off the toilet...they'll eventually go away.
 
2013-10-09 02:57:46 PM

Agnes Gonxha's Confidant: So Ironic means random...


that's ironic, I thought is was like rain on your wedding day.
 
2013-10-09 02:58:13 PM

Typhoid: I don't have a pony in this race but I'll point out that not everyone has roommates one at a time. Some people share a house with 6 people (*cough* college *cough*).


yeah, one of my 6 roomates used to take a dump in a plastic Solo cup and put it under people's beds.  One of them practiced drums every day but wasn't ever in a band.  One was a violent blackout drunk.  One used to scream out our livingroom window down to people on the street every night.  (one was kind of normal)  None of them paid bills or cleaned or did dishes.  I'll take the attention craving bikini girl who cooks.
 
2013-10-09 02:58:30 PM

mcreadyblue: Well, if its on Fark, yes.


Touche.
 
2013-10-09 02:59:15 PM
Yeah..but look close at the tits....uhhh...pass.
 
2013-10-09 02:59:55 PM
Ad doesn't say she puts out. I have a rule, if I'm living with a woman that I'm not related to and who is at least reasonably attractive, she must either put out for me or regularly and frequently have reasonably attractive women friends (no pros) over who will take up the slack.

It's a rule, and I live by it. We all need rules to live by, after all.
 
2013-10-09 03:02:17 PM

blatz514: Hipster?  No thanks.


Some of my best roommates have been hipsters.

What turns me off is the repeated use of the word "creative".  Anyone that describes themselves with the word "creative" repeatedly is going to actually spend 90% of her time  telling everyone in earshot about how hipster she is.  This means she's boring and also won't shut the hell up, kind of a killer for a room-mate relationship.

I didn't hang out with or even really talk to my hipster roomie much.  That was a big part of why we really liked each other and stayed together for almost three years.  Completely divergent majors (in undergrad at the time), different schedules, different social circles, and the extent of three years of conversation was about an hour or two about contract renewal and about half an hour accumulated of "Hey, Jim, want a beer?" "Sure" and "Hey, Shane, got some leftover rice in that can" "Thanks."  farking roommate perfection.

//For reference, this was even though our apartment was a one-room that we shared with 1-2 additional roommates.  I's poor.
 
2013-10-09 03:04:08 PM
 

GooberMcFly: F*ck the words, if she can attract sculpted naked men to between her legs, I'm in.


That's a notorious gay nude beach in San Francisco.
 
2013-10-09 03:04:30 PM

Dadoo: mcreadyblue: Gecko Gingrich: Nadie_AZ: Ironic naked man?

Well, were you expecting a naked man to be in the background of the picture?

Well, if its on Fark, yes.

Okay, maybe I'm missing the joke, here, but everyone actually sees the naked man in the background of the picture, right?


How long have you been seeing these invisible naked men?
 
2013-10-09 03:04:42 PM

blatz514: theflatline: trucktrash: tuna fingers: Hmmm... Ad doesn't seem to mention if she's into casual beej.

Look at her Twitter profile pic and make that decision for yourself. (gotta RTFA)

post pic for those of us at work.

[si0.twimg.com image 500x500]


The background pic on her Twitter page is staged to make her look like a celebrity surrounded by bodyguards and paparazzi. She's a full-throttle attention whore.
 
2013-10-09 03:06:02 PM

GBB: highendmighty: It's not strange that she has had so many roommates?  Testimonials are nice, but the turnover seems to be a big issue for some reason.

Suicides


Yeah...that's the ticket.  "Suicides."
 
2013-10-09 03:07:05 PM
Meh I hate hipsters but maybe she can suck a mean cawk.
 
2013-10-09 03:11:56 PM
I'm pretty social normally, but a roommate selling themselves as some sort of super awesome partygoer sounds like a potential nightmare. The day I left college pretty much marked the day I started to go to bed on most weeknights by 10:30pm. I only need about 6 hours of sleep to function, but damn it, anything less than that and I'm not suitable to interact with other humans for the next 24 hours.

Even if she doesn't drink herself stupid, she sounds like the kind of person that just LOVES to have people over all the damn time. Sorry kid, but even if you bring friends over who put out, I'm going to be pretty cross if your "Taco Tuesday" parties go past midnight.
 
2013-10-09 03:12:02 PM
I was into rooming with Lauren before she sold out and went mainstream.  Got a really cool roommate now but you probably never heard of her
 
2013-10-09 03:13:40 PM
Jesus Christ, pick a typeface!!
 
2013-10-09 03:13:43 PM

you are a puppet: Well she's apparently good at cooking and will cook for you. I like that, and the cleanness is a plus. Not a big fan of the excessive self-congratulation of it all though. I also am not fond of the idea of having a girl roommate. Or a guy roommate. I would rather pay twice the rent than deal with a roommate again (I've never even argued with roommates before, I just always secretly hate them for being in MY home)


Yeppers. Had a roomie who went from being laidback, hardworking and liked to cook but changed immediately once she was in MY apartment. Suddenly, she couldn't work because she had "headaches" that only pot and a 3am trip to the ER for morphine/demerol would cure. The only thing she was willing to be awake for was downloading music on Napster and trolling for suckers in chat rooms. Never had money for rent, always had money for pot.

I waited until she visited friends out of town, then I moved to a new location by myself, leaving her without a single stick of furniture or pots and pans. Then she showed up at my workplace, claiming I was only hurting myself by not paying for all her bills and giving her a free place to live. WTF? She didn't know I'd paid a fee and gotten my name taken off the lease. Heh.
 
2013-10-09 03:17:21 PM

busy chillin': definitely not neurotic = neurotic as a motherf*cker.


This.  Learn to decrypt.
 
2013-10-09 03:17:23 PM

Agnes Gonxha's Confidant: What is this word I see used so much?  Ironic? What does it mean? Ironic?

Ironic naked man in the background?

So Ironic means random...


Yeah.. a naked man isn't the opposite of what I'd expect to see in between her legs.
 
Bf+
2013-10-09 03:18:44 PM
Run
 
2013-10-09 03:19:30 PM
... Ah, why the hell not.
 
2013-10-09 03:20:24 PM

Cybernetic: The background pic on her Twitter page is staged to make her look like a celebrity surrounded by bodyguards and paparazzi. She's a full-throttle attention whore.

i277.photobucket.com

Profile pic. Not "header pic".

/facepalm
 
2013-10-09 03:20:42 PM
Conclusion:Subby doesn't understand me.
 
2013-10-09 03:21:00 PM
Well she's always welcome to come live with me. I've got an extra dungeon er, room down in my basement.

www.scrapbookpages.com

I wonder if she puts the lotion in the basket on the first 'date'?
 
2013-10-09 03:21:04 PM

Dadoo: mcreadyblue: Gecko Gingrich: Nadie_AZ: Ironic naked man?

Well, were you expecting a naked man to be in the background of the picture?

Well, if its on Fark, yes.

Okay, maybe I'm missing the joke, here, but everyone actually sees the naked man in the background of the picture, right?


Only homosexuals can see him.

/NTTAWWT
 
2013-10-09 03:21:34 PM
I thought it was funny. Why am I supposed to be crabby when someone makes a boring everyday mundane event slightly fun?
 
2013-10-09 03:29:54 PM

thecpt: I thought it was funny. Why am I supposed to be crabby when someone makes a boring everyday mundane event slightly fun?


Because hipsters, or something.
 
2013-10-09 03:32:34 PM
In college I rented a room from a guy that was the slob from hell. He had a dog that pissed all over the living room so you had to wear shoes there or you would find a wet spot on the carpet. I pretty much kept to myself, if I had used a plate or glass I would have to clean the whole months worth of dishes he had in the sink. I pretty much ate off of paper plates and solo cups to avoid listening to him whine. One day I got home from class and was just planning on studying and working on a paper and he was cleaning the living room. He told me I had to help him clean because he was having people over. I told him to point out what was my mess and I would clean it up, the pile of dog poop? Nope not mine. The beer bottles, nope not mine. The clothes? Nope. The chair in the wall? Nope. I was glad a month later school was done.
 
2013-10-09 03:33:05 PM

Dadoo: mcreadyblue: Gecko Gingrich: Nadie_AZ: Ironic naked man?

Well, were you expecting a naked man to be in the background of the picture?

Well, if its on Fark, yes.

Okay, maybe I'm missing the joke, here, but everyone actually sees the naked man in the background of the picture, right?



i105.photobucket.com
 
2013-10-09 03:34:17 PM
She had me at the shorts.
 
2013-10-09 03:34:57 PM

Inchoate: thecpt: I thought it was funny. Why am I supposed to be crabby when someone makes a boring everyday mundane event slightly fun?

Because hipsters, or something.


GIS for "Hipsters!"

cdn0.lostateminor.com

/sorry
 
2013-10-09 03:37:19 PM
"housewife trapped in a hipster body" ?

Betting that's the first time that sentence has ever appeared in an ad for roommates
 
2013-10-09 03:38:05 PM
img.fark.net
The guy in the background looks a whole lot like Jemaine Clement.
 
2013-10-09 03:40:21 PM

you are a puppet: vudukungfu: Is this not the chick that used to be fat on "friends"?

Ha, she's on my TV screen right now, because Cougar Town is on for some reason. Funny thing is

ironically her face isn't the most farked up via surgery one on this show. Kate from Drew Carey looks like a weird mannequin.

FTFHipsters
 
2013-10-09 03:43:17 PM
Craigslist? There can be only one ...

www.metalinsider.net
 
2013-10-09 03:47:30 PM
Judging by some of the responses here, a lot of you aren't ready to give up mom's basement quite yet.
 
2013-10-09 03:52:25 PM
Meh, I'd PIITB.
 
2013-10-09 03:56:24 PM
Found another pict of Lauren....

buskfilms.com
 
2013-10-09 03:57:36 PM

vudukungfu: Agnes Gonxha's Confidant: So Ironic means random...

that's ironic, I thought is was like rain on your wedding day.


Noooo!  It's ironic because...you see...most people wear clothes but in this case....he's NOT wearing clothes...to make a statement...wait...no...he's ironic because she's including the picture of herself to show that she's cool and down with anything and most people wouldn't....so it's more ironic on her part because...he...

You're right.  It's like-10,000-spoons-when-all-you-need-is-a-knife ironic.

Just don't think about the words in her ad.  The message is that this chick is uber cool and there is absolutely no way you'll come home and find her making a broth from your soiled undergarments.
 
2013-10-09 04:04:20 PM

trippdogg: Judging by some of the responses here, a lot of you aren't ready to give up mom's basement quite yet.


I was thinking the same thing. Nothing wrong with a person getting creative to get a roommate. You see enough ads for roommates and they all start looking the same. I say Good for her.
 
2013-10-09 04:08:15 PM
Unless the naked guy is a midget, thos girls look humongous. Sorry Lauren, my house only has 10 foot ceilings.
 
2013-10-09 04:21:10 PM
Grow up and get married.
 
2013-10-09 04:26:48 PM

you are a puppet: I also am not fond of the idea of having a girl roommate. Or a guy roommate. I would rather pay twice the rent than deal with a roommate again (I've never even argued with roommates before, I just always secretly hate them for being in MY home)


I've got a girl roomate. She is my cousin's best friend. She was going through a divorce and I told her she could crash at my place while she got sorted out. She showed up with a moving truck one day. That was 5 years ago. She doesn't pay rent, but does all the cooking (quite well), grocery shopping, cleans all the dishes, does my laundry, vacums, and even does misc stuff like painting the living room . Namely all the stuff I don't want to do. She gets a room I wasn't using, I get all the housework done. It's like having a wife I don't have sex with.
 
2013-10-09 04:30:59 PM

Slaves2Darkness: highendmighty: It's not strange that she has had so many roommates?  Testimonials are nice, but the turnover seems to be a big issue for some reason.

Meh, she can move in with me. I have a fully furnished dungeon, I mean apartment, in the basement. Shower, sink, stove, St. Andrews Cross, spanking bench, and swing all included.


I'll trade off weekends with ya. Don't have a furnished dungeon errr..."basement" but do have a nice big, fenced in back yard with a tether line.
 
2013-10-09 04:31:02 PM

MythDragon:  It's like having a wife I don't have sex with.



That statement is redundant.
 
2013-10-09 04:35:56 PM

MythDragon: you are a puppet: I also am not fond of the idea of having a girl roommate. Or a guy roommate. I would rather pay twice the rent than deal with a roommate again (I've never even argued with roommates before, I just always secretly hate them for being in MY home)

I've got a girl roomate. She is my cousin's best friend. She was going through a divorce and I told her she could crash at my place while she got sorted out. She showed up with a moving truck one day. That was 5 years ago. She doesn't pay rent, but does all the cooking (quite well), grocery shopping, cleans all the dishes, does my laundry, vacums, and even does misc stuff like painting the living room . Namely all the stuff I don't want to do. She gets a room I wasn't using, I get all the housework done. It's like having a wife I don't have sex with.


Well you could always start having sex with her...

Actually that sounds like a great arrangement, I would totally go for that but it would probably upset my wife who doesn't do any of that stuff but does have sex with me.  The real question is which do I value more, sex or a functional home life?

/let me know if she is looking to move to Canada
 
2013-10-09 04:52:41 PM

Egoy3k: MythDragon: you are a puppet: I also am not fond of the idea of having a girl roommate. Or a guy roommate. I would rather pay twice the rent than deal with a roommate again (I've never even argued with roommates before, I just always secretly hate them for being in MY home)

I've got a girl roomate. She is my cousin's best friend. She was going through a divorce and I told her she could crash at my place while she got sorted out. She showed up with a moving truck one day. That was 5 years ago. She doesn't pay rent, but does all the cooking (quite well), grocery shopping, cleans all the dishes, does my laundry, vacums, and even does misc stuff like painting the living room . Namely all the stuff I don't want to do. She gets a room I wasn't using, I get all the housework done. It's like having a wife I don't have sex with.

Well you could always start having sex with her...

Actually that sounds like a great arrangement, I would totally go for that but it would probably upset my wife who doesn't do any of that stuff but does have sex with me.  The real question is which do I value more, sex or a functional home life?

/let me know if she is looking to move to Canada


I like thin asian girls. She's none of those (except for the girl part)
 
2013-10-09 04:52:51 PM
Would hit it but if I'm being critical (hey, this is Fark) she looks a little untoned and flabby. But her weight is good, so that's a start.
 
2013-10-09 04:55:57 PM

MythDragon: you are a puppet: I also am not fond of the idea of having a girl roommate. Or a guy roommate. I would rather pay twice the rent than deal with a roommate again (I've never even argued with roommates before, I just always secretly hate them for being in MY home)

I've got a girl roomate. She is my cousin's best friend. She was going through a divorce and I told her she could crash at my place while she got sorted out. She showed up with a moving truck one day. That was 5 years ago. She doesn't pay rent, but does all the cooking (quite well), grocery shopping, cleans all the dishes, does my laundry, vacums, and even does misc stuff like painting the living room . Namely all the stuff I don't want to do. She gets a room I wasn't using, I get all the housework done. It's like having a wife I don't have sex with.


So, like having a wife then.
 
2013-10-09 05:13:48 PM
The flyer's over-fonted.

Next.
 
2013-10-09 05:15:46 PM

MythDragon: It's like having a wife I don't have sex with.



www.lexisnexis.com

Is there another kind?
 
2013-10-09 05:27:25 PM
Serious question here - why do Hipsters were that nasty ski cap pulled half off their head? I'm the type of person who is always hot. Summer, spring fall, winter. I wear polo shirts all year long because I'll sweat through a dress shirt in no time. During the summers, I'll leave a puddle if I stand in one place for any length of time.

Aside from trying to look... let's say "cool", why the fark would you wear a ski cap in the summer?
 
2013-10-09 05:31:21 PM
Ad FAIL. I didn't read one thing about how good she is at BJs and that is pretty much a deal breaker for me.
 
2013-10-09 05:50:21 PM
Imagine that poster trying to snag a girlfriend/boyfriend instead.  Then it's really creepy.
 
m00
2013-10-09 05:50:49 PM

Egoy3k: The best room mate I ever was the stoner who played WoW all the time. Living with him was pretty much the same as removing one bedroom from your apartment, cutting the rent in half and getting a free upgrade for the internet package. The only sings we ever saw of him were the occasional pizza delivery and a faint aroma of pot on the balcony. It was like living with an overweight, slightly flatulent ninja.


Roomie?! Is that you?!
 
m00
2013-10-09 05:53:37 PM

Cheron: I was into rooming with Lauren before she sold out and went mainstream.  Got a really cool roommate now but you probably never heard of her


/thread
 
m00
2013-10-09 05:54:44 PM

Egoy3k: It's like having a wife I don't have sex with.


So... a wife.
 
2013-10-09 05:56:05 PM
Roommate? No. Not looking for one of those. Sex slave? Sure. She looks like she'd be good for a romp in the sack...gotta remember the ball-gag, though.
 
2013-10-09 06:03:58 PM
She sounds boring as shiat. Housework and parties* are for people too dim to have a hobby. Posting offensive jokes on the internet, now there's a hobby!

/*also, politics.
 
2013-10-09 06:07:26 PM
I'm the first?
1.bp.blogspot.com
 
2013-10-09 06:15:33 PM

jnapier: I'm the first?
[1.bp.blogspot.com image 400x256]


What does Justin Bieber have to do with this thread?
 
2013-10-09 06:23:53 PM

Valiente: Ad doesn't feature the critical landlord quote: "She never missed rent and didn't trash the place with clove-cigarettes and drunken hipster douchebag guests."

I don't really care what the cast of "Girls" thinks about her.


Oh, gosh. I smoked cloves for years (still do but not as much since they are now made as heavier "cigars") and only discovered a couple years ago how much they really DO stink up the house.

/I smoke 'em only outside on the porch these days so I guess I'm getting better. Kind of.
 
2013-10-09 06:49:29 PM
Wow. Look at all the people subby doesn't understand!
 
2013-10-09 06:50:22 PM
1. I really don't know how people can bear to have roommates who aren't legally married or related to them. Living with friends SUCKS. It ruins friendships. Living with strangers SUCKS MORE.

2. The girl sounds like a real pain in the ass extrovert. No thanks.

3. Honestly, if you can't afford to live in a bigger place with a bunch of idiots, then find a smaller place and live alone. It's much more comfortable. You can walk around naked and skip doing dishes for a day, and nobody leaves you a passive-aggressive note. You can eat ANYTHING in the fridge or cupboards without someone biatching at you. You can listen to whatever music you want, at whatever volume you want, at any time of the day. You can have sex on the couch without worrying about someone passing through.

How the HELL do people put up with roommates? I'd sooner live in my car than put up with roommates. A wife? Sure. Parents or siblings? Tolerable. Roommates who have no ties to you? FORGET IT.
 
2013-10-09 07:23:18 PM
ZeroCorpse:

How the HELL do people put up with roommates? I'd sooner live in my car than put up with roommates. A wife? Sure. Parents or siblings? Tolerable. Roommates who have no ties to you? FORGET IT.

I always had good experiences with roommates, but then again they were all passive, but smart and interesting stoners, and my friends.  On the flip side, if I had to live with any of my family, I'd have a mental breakdown within days.

I learned many good lessons in patience, picking battles, and just letting shiat slide.

Roommates eating your shiat?  Get a mini fridge.
Not cleaning dishes?  Use paper plates.
Cluttered common rooms?  Start picking shiat up.

To be honest, I don't understand why everyone has such a problem with roommates.  I lived with 5 people in a tiny-ass house, and was none the worse for wear.  Then again, they were all my friends, and I knew how they lived before I moved in... I guess if you are having problems with roommates, you are choosing poorly.
 
2013-10-09 07:41:29 PM

ZeroCorpse: Honestly, if you can't afford to live in a bigger place with a bunch of idiots, then find a smaller place and live alone. It's much more comfortable. You can walk around naked and skip doing dishes for a day, and nobody leaves you a passive-aggressive note. You can eat ANYTHING in the fridge or cupboards without someone biatching at you. You can listen to whatever music you want, at whatever volume you want, at any time of the day. You can have sex on the couch without worrying about someone passing through.


Judging by the background on the poster, she lives in or somewhere near San Francisco.  A tiny studio apartment in a non-hellish part of town would probably start at $1,500/month.
 
2013-10-09 08:09:52 PM

ZeroCorpse: 1. I really don't know how people can bear to have roommates who aren't legally married or related to them. Living with friends SUCKS. It ruins friendships. Living with strangers SUCKS MORE.

2. The girl sounds like a real pain in the ass extrovert. No thanks.

3. Honestly, if you can't afford to live in a bigger place with a bunch of idiots, then find a smaller place and live alone. It's much more comfortable. You can walk around naked and skip doing dishes for a day, and nobody leaves you a passive-aggressive note. You can eat ANYTHING in the fridge or cupboards without someone biatching at you. You can listen to whatever music you want, at whatever volume you want, at any time of the day. You can have sex on the couch without worrying about someone passing through.

How the HELL do people put up with roommates? I'd sooner live in my car than put up with roommates. A wife? Sure. Parents or siblings? Tolerable. Roommates who have no ties to you? FORGET IT.


I had a roommate for several years when I was in my 20's. We were co-workers, and got along well, but weren't really close friends, which I think actually helped. I did my thing, he did his thing, and we split the bills. That was pretty much it. We shared a townhouse for nearly four years with no problems.
 
2013-10-09 09:14:06 PM

Rindred: Slaves2Darkness: highendmighty: It's not strange that she has had so many roommates?  Testimonials are nice, but the turnover seems to be a big issue for some reason.

Meh, she can move in with me. I have a fully furnished dungeon, I mean apartment, in the basement. Shower, sink, stove, St. Andrews Cross, spanking bench, and swing all included.

Wait, do I know you?


No. People like you are EVERYWHERE.
 
2013-10-09 09:39:08 PM
I found another picture of her...

www.summercampculture.com
 
2013-10-09 10:17:12 PM
She can cook scrambled eggs and mac and cheese? Give her a farking medal!
 
2013-10-09 10:17:57 PM

highendmighty: It's not strange that she has had so many roommates?  Testimonials are nice, but the turnover seems to be a big issue for some reason.


For nyc, no.
 
2013-10-09 10:37:23 PM
 Craigslist? There can be only one ...

[www.metalinsider.net image 563x402]



0.tqn.comt
 
2013-10-09 10:39:20 PM
She seems really, really into wanting to be liked by other people, and that's nice and all, but will she pay rent on time?
 
2013-10-09 10:41:35 PM

MythDragon: you are a puppet: I also am not fond of the idea of having a girl roommate. Or a guy roommate. I would rather pay twice the rent than deal with a roommate again (I've never even argued with roommates before, I just always secretly hate them for being in MY home)

I've got a girl roomate. She is my cousin's best friend. She was going through a divorce and I told her she could crash at my place while she got sorted out. She showed up with a moving truck one day. That was 5 years ago. She doesn't pay rent, but does all the cooking (quite well), grocery shopping, cleans all the dishes, does my laundry, vacums, and even does misc stuff like painting the living room . Namely all the stuff I don't want to do. She gets a room I wasn't using, I get all the housework done. It's like having a wife I don't have sex with.


The question is, if you bring another girl back home what would be her reaction?
 
2013-10-09 10:47:29 PM

boyvoyeur: Serious question here - why do Hipsters were that nasty ski cap pulled half off their head? I'm the type of person who is always hot. Summer, spring fall, winter. I wear polo shirts all year long because I'll sweat through a dress shirt in no time. During the summers, I'll leave a puddle if I stand in one place for any length of time.

Aside from trying to look... let's say "cool", why the fark would you wear a ski cap in the summer?


Because I'm not a human heater and I'd rather be too warm than too cold.

/or just to piss you off
//yeah, it's the second one
 
2013-10-09 11:45:21 PM
Actually, that's brilliant.
 
2013-10-10 12:04:33 AM
Don't forget her's and every other hipster's permanent houseguests:
doblelol.com
 
2013-10-10 03:44:53 AM

stuhayes2010: CruJones: She sounds exhausting

This.  I dated a Lauren type once, it was exhausting.  And it was amazing that someone who talked about themselves so much, she had very few stories.  So you get to hear the same ones over and over.


I've found that hipsters are a lot like talking to people with Alzheimer;s. They think everything they find is new, their stories are the same over and over, they need assistance to function normally, and they generally tend to smell..
 
2013-10-10 09:19:29 AM

Dadoo: mcreadyblue: Gecko Gingrich: Nadie_AZ: Ironic naked man?

Well, were you expecting a naked man to be in the background of the picture?

Well, if its on Fark, yes.

Okay, maybe I'm missing the joke, here, but everyone actually sees the naked man in the background of the picture, right?


I think it's just you.
 
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