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(Right Wing Watch)   Republican plan to replace Obamacare: praying to God to heal your cancer. But missing limbs aren't covered - they're a pre-existing condition   (rightwingwatch.org) divider line 49
    More: Interesting, obamacare, god, praying, cancers  
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1948 clicks; posted to Politics » on 09 Oct 2013 at 12:22 PM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



49 Comments   (+0 »)
   
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest
 
2013-10-09 10:54:59 AM  
Walk it off.  If that doesn't work, try laying in the sun for awhile.
 
2013-10-09 10:59:42 AM  
Rub some dirt on it.
 
2013-10-09 11:07:05 AM  
"In my medical opinion you should stop being such a Nancy and bootstrap that lung cancer the fark out of your body."
 
2013-10-09 11:07:11 AM  
Just walk it off...oh.
 
2013-10-09 11:07:31 AM  
 
2013-10-09 11:21:46 AM  
Oh Pat, you card.
 
2013-10-09 12:24:10 PM  
I was hoping my doctor and I could barter with chickens.
 
2013-10-09 12:24:31 PM  
"It's a different level of faith," Robertson said.

"I'm just a level 5 evangelical, our Healing Prayer ability isn't strong enough for limbs, you'd need like, 5 straight 100s on a d100 for that."
 
2013-10-09 12:25:20 PM  
Senile old fark says what?
 
2013-10-09 12:25:31 PM  

mediablitz: Rub some dirt on it.


Then put an acorn in the dirt and you'll grow an awesome tree arm!
 
2013-10-09 12:25:42 PM  
Tussin.
 
2013-10-09 12:27:11 PM  
Basically "Don't expect us to pray for anything that would actually never happen without a miracle, just trust us when we tell you that things that could happen without a miracle can surely only be attributed to god, and when when anyone prays to one of those 'false' gods and gets the same results we do, that doesn't count."

Amazing how that "works" isn't it? Only those things which could have occurred with or without god existing are ever attributed to god.
 
2013-10-09 12:28:01 PM  

nmrsnr: "It's a different level of faith," Robertson said.

"I'm just a level 5 evangelical, our Healing Prayer ability isn't strong enough for limbs, you'd need like, 5 straight 100s on a d100 for that."


Be an atheist Ur-priest, cleric spells at double progression stealing power from the gods.
 
2013-10-09 12:29:32 PM  
Obama should just agree to repeal and replace. With Medicare-for-all. Fark the insurance companies and their GOP healthcare plan.
 
2013-10-09 12:29:44 PM  
If god handed out miracles like lollipops I'd be banging Halle Berry right now instead of typing this crap.
 
2013-10-09 12:29:47 PM  
What an evil fark. It's an injustice that that tumor on humanity's consciousness still draws breath.
 
2013-10-09 12:29:54 PM  
Use that miracle spray you see in soccer games that allows a person who behaves like they were just shot in the knee to get up fifteen seconds later to chase down the ball again at full throttle.
 
2013-10-09 12:33:08 PM  

Muta: I was hoping my doctor and I could barter with chickens.


The best part about bartering with chickens is that they always want chicken feed.
 
2013-10-09 12:33:19 PM  
"Republican plan to replace Obamacare: praying to God", which is doing nothing and thinking you are.
Purest stupidity and the biggest scam in the history of mankind.
 
2013-10-09 12:34:30 PM  

syrynxx: http://whydoesgodhateamputees.com/


It's similar to the argument about how people say that ten passengers survived the airplane crash is a miracle, while ignoring the 138 other passengers who died
 
2013-10-09 12:44:01 PM  

Lord Dimwit: syrynxx: http://whydoesgodhateamputees.com/

It's similar to the argument about how people say that ten passengers survived the airplane crash is a miracle, while ignoring the 138 other passengers who died

 
2013-10-09 12:47:33 PM  

TheBigJerk: mediablitz: Rub some dirt on it.

Then put an acorn in the dirt and you'll grow an awesome tree arm!


Miracle-Gro.
 
2013-10-09 12:51:43 PM  

randomjsa: Basically "Don't expect us to pray for anything that would actually never happen without a miracle, just trust us when we tell you that things that could happen without a miracle can surely only be attributed to god, and when when anyone prays to one of those 'false' gods and gets the same results we do, that doesn't count."

Amazing how that "works" isn't it? Only those things which could have occurred with or without god existing are ever attributed to god.


If God is limited to only those acts which could be performed by man ... then what good is He?
 
2013-10-09 01:02:41 PM  
Pat, you're doing it again.  Talking out of your ass.  And getting paid to do so.  Talk to a biologist about how regeneration works.

I hope the karma train runs you over and then backs up over you.  And those poor people you suckered into giving you their money get refunds.
 
2013-10-09 01:03:18 PM  
...and when playing football, try to favor the other leg.
 
2013-10-09 01:22:18 PM  
Eileen?
 
2013-10-09 01:27:58 PM  

Lord Dimwit: syrynxx: http://whydoesgodhateamputees.com/

It's similar to the argument about how people say that ten passengers survived the airplane crash is a miracle, while ignoring the 138 other passengers who died


Back when I was a firefighter the story -- always attributed to a nameless hosehead -- used to circulate that "One time in (name of local town) they had a really bad burner -- started in a row home and ended up taking the block down. (Ever-changing number) of people died in the fire and dozens were homeless. When they finally knocked it down the Fire Marshal was going through the wreckage and, in the midst of the destroyed home, he found a Bible (or Virgin Mary photo, or Jesus statue, or complete DVD set of "BJ and the Bear" or whatever) that was pristine -- totally undamaged by the flames and water. There's proof of the unmistakable power of the Almighty."

The children that were asphyxiated and then roasted and the people left with nothing except what they could escape the flames with in their hands apparently were not worthy of protection, but that $1.99 printed-in-Taiwan Bible from Woolworth's demanded Divine Intervention.
 
2013-10-09 01:36:37 PM  

Mr. Coffee Nerves: Lord Dimwit: syrynxx: http://whydoesgodhateamputees.com/

It's similar to the argument about how people say that ten passengers survived the airplane crash is a miracle, while ignoring the 138 other passengers who died

Back when I was a firefighter the story -- always attributed to a nameless hosehead -- used to circulate that "One time in (name of local town) they had a really bad burner -- started in a row home and ended up taking the block down. (Ever-changing number) of people died in the fire and dozens were homeless. When they finally knocked it down the Fire Marshal was going through the wreckage and, in the midst of the destroyed home, he found a Bible (or Virgin Mary photo, or Jesus statue, or complete DVD set of "BJ and the Bear" or whatever) that was pristine -- totally undamaged by the flames and water. There's proof of the unmistakable power of the Almighty."

The children that were asphyxiated and then roasted and the people left with nothing except what they could escape the flames with in their hands apparently were not worthy of protection, but that $1.99 printed-in-Taiwan Bible from Woolworth's demanded Divine Intervention.


God wants his Merch kept intact damnit.
 
2013-10-09 01:45:32 PM  

Mr. Coffee Nerves: Lord Dimwit: syrynxx: http://whydoesgodhateamputees.com/

It's similar to the argument about how people say that ten passengers survived the airplane crash is a miracle, while ignoring the 138 other passengers who died

Back when I was a firefighter the story -- always attributed to a nameless hosehead -- used to circulate that "One time in (name of local town) they had a really bad burner -- started in a row home and ended up taking the block down. (Ever-changing number) of people died in the fire and dozens were homeless. When they finally knocked it down the Fire Marshal was going through the wreckage and, in the midst of the destroyed home, he found a Bible (or Virgin Mary photo, or Jesus statue, or complete DVD set of "BJ and the Bear" or whatever) that was pristine -- totally undamaged by the flames and water. There's proof of the unmistakable power of the Almighty."

The children that were asphyxiated and then roasted and the people left with nothing except what they could escape the flames with in their hands apparently were not worthy of protection, but that $1.99 printed-in-Taiwan Bible from Woolworth's demanded Divine Intervention.


God does NOT fark with the Gideons.
 
2013-10-09 01:55:01 PM  

monoski: Eileen?

Irene?  (Chinese)

 
2013-10-09 01:58:12 PM  

TheBigJerk: nmrsnr: "It's a different level of faith," Robertson said.

"I'm just a level 5 evangelical, our Healing Prayer ability isn't strong enough for limbs, you'd need like, 5 straight 100s on a d100 for that."

Be an atheist Ur-priest, cleric spells at double progression stealing power from the gods.


So, not to split hairs, but by definition Ur-priests cannot be atheists.

Unless you'd like to explain the logic of how they steal power from something they don't believe in?
 
2013-10-09 02:06:24 PM  

syrynxx: http://whydoesgodhateamputees.com/


Love that site. If limb regrowth ever  really happened, there would be such a buzz in the scientific world, everyone would know about it. The fact that limb regrowth has never been seen or documented (beyond urban legend) in humans is compelling enough evidence that god(s) with the power to heal either do not exist or do not work the way Pat thinks they do.
 
2013-10-09 02:13:02 PM  

grumpfuff: TheBigJerk: nmrsnr: "It's a different level of faith," Robertson said.

"I'm just a level 5 evangelical, our Healing Prayer ability isn't strong enough for limbs, you'd need like, 5 straight 100s on a d100 for that."

Be an atheist Ur-priest, cleric spells at double progression stealing power from the gods.

So, not to split hairs, but by definition Ur-priests cannot be atheists.

Unless you'd like to explain the logic of how they steal power from something they don't believe in?


I would imagine that they believe in the gods, but don't consider them to be truly divine.
After all, what does a god need with a home security system?  Especially one that's broke.
After all, you don't see any of those guys stealing from Lord Ao
 
2013-10-09 02:34:52 PM  
Fictitious solutions for real problems(like healthcare) and real solutions for fictitious problems(like Saddam Hussein's nukes).  That's the republican way.
 
2013-10-09 02:56:52 PM  

nmrsnr: "It's a different level of faith," Robertson said.

"I'm just a level 5 evangelical, our Healing Prayer ability isn't strong enough for limbs, you'd need like, 5 straight 100s on a d100 for that."


IIRC, in AD&D "Deities and Demigods" the Midgard Serpent could only be killed by inflicting 400 hit points of damage on its head in a single round.  It also regenerated 400 hit points per round.  Thor's stats had him able to inflict 10 d10 damage with Mjolnir, and he had four attacks per round.  So during Ragnarok, Thor had to keep swinging away until he managed to roll four 00s in a row in a single round.

Pat Robertson healing an amputee is 100 times harder than that.
 
2013-10-09 03:00:59 PM  

mediablitz: Rub some dirt on it.


Well, the assumption that we need to "replace ObamaCare with something else" is idiotic.  Get rid of ObamaCare, and slowly tweak the present system to slowly mold it into something better and manageable.  Start by letting insurance companies do business across state lines.
 
2013-10-09 03:01:43 PM  
It's not about praying, it's about sending money.   Lots of money.
 
2013-10-09 03:04:01 PM  
You know what, I just realized Heal is a 6th level cleric spell, while Regenerate is 7th level.  Pat Robertson just needs to level up once or twice, and all will be well.

Interestingly, Symbol of Fear and Symbol of Persuasion are also 6th level cleric spells.

Citation:  http://www.dandwiki.com/wiki/SRD:Cleric_Spell_List
 
2013-10-09 03:04:45 PM  
This is why Robertson has to keep his diamond mining operation going.  If he finds the ancient stone of Ra he'll be able to restore missing limbs.
 
2013-10-09 03:05:14 PM  

armoredbulldozer: mediablitz: Rub some dirt on it.

Well, the assumption that we need to "replace ObamaCare with something else" is idiotic.  Get rid of ObamaCare, and slowly tweak the present system to slowly mold it into something better and manageable.  Start by letting insurance companies do business across state lines in whichever state has the loosest regulations and allows them to screw over customers the most..


You know your idea to replace Obamacare is bad when not even WND will agree with you.
 
2013-10-09 03:10:55 PM  

Parthenogenetic: IIRC, in AD&D "Deities and Demigods" the Midgard Serpent could only be killed by inflicting 400 hit points of damage on its head in a single round. It also regenerated 400 hit points per round. Thor's stats had him able to inflict 10 d10 damage with Mjolnir, and he had four attacks per round. So during Ragnarok, Thor had to keep swinging away until he managed to roll four 00s in a row in a single round.

Pat Robertson healing an amputee is 100 times harder than that.


10d10≠1d100.

The odds of getting 100 damage on 10d10 is not 1 in 100, but 1 in 10,000,000,000.
 
2013-10-09 03:13:03 PM  
I really doubt Pat has PC class levels. I have him pegged for a cross-class adept/aristocrat
 
2013-10-09 03:22:07 PM  

abb3w: Parthenogenetic: IIRC, in AD&D "Deities and Demigods" the Midgard Serpent could only be killed by inflicting 400 hit points of damage on its head in a single round. It also regenerated 400 hit points per round. Thor's stats had him able to inflict 10 d10 damage with Mjolnir, and he had four attacks per round. So during Ragnarok, Thor had to keep swinging away until he managed to roll four 00s in a row in a single round.

Pat Robertson healing an amputee is 100 times harder than that.

10d10≠1d100.

The odds of getting 100 damage on 10d10 is not 1 in 100, but 1 in 10,000,000,000.


Aaaaggghhhh something went kablooey between my brain and my fingers.  You are correct, and I meant to type that AD&D Mjolnir inflicts d100, not 10 d10.  For some reason I was thinking of the damage inflicted by the Tiltowait spell.

/neeeerrrrrddddssss
 
2013-10-09 03:35:51 PM  

Parthenogenetic: nmrsnr: "It's a different level of faith," Robertson said.

"I'm just a level 5 evangelical, our Healing Prayer ability isn't strong enough for limbs, you'd need like, 5 straight 100s on a d100 for that."

IIRC, in AD&D "Deities and Demigods" the Midgard Serpent could only be killed by inflicting 400 hit points of damage on its head in a single round.  It also regenerated 400 hit points per round.  Thor's stats had him able to inflict 10 d10 damage with Mjolnir, and he had four attacks per round.  So during Ragnarok, Thor had to keep swinging away until he managed to roll four 00s in a row in a single round.

Pat Robertson healing an amputee is 100 times harder than that.


That's fine, but shouldn't Thor have gotten a strength bonus on his damage rolls?
 
2013-10-09 04:32:58 PM  

grumpfuff: TheBigJerk: nmrsnr: "It's a different level of faith," Robertson said.

"I'm just a level 5 evangelical, our Healing Prayer ability isn't strong enough for limbs, you'd need like, 5 straight 100s on a d100 for that."

Be an atheist Ur-priest, cleric spells at double progression stealing power from the gods.

So, not to split hairs, but by definition Ur-priests cannot be atheists.

Unless you'd like to explain the logic of how they steal power from something they don't believe in?


Like the athar, they consider the gods to be false and merely powerful, manipulative, (and exploitable) beings.
 
2013-10-09 04:37:22 PM  
WWRWJD?

What Would Right-Wing Jesus do?

farm8.staticflickr.com
 
2013-10-09 05:40:20 PM  
grumpfuff: Be an atheist Ur-priest, cleric spells at double progression stealing power from the gods.

So, not to split hairs, but by definition Ur-priests cannot be atheists.

Unless you'd like to explain the logic of how they steal power from something they don't believe in?


Makes as much sense as the link the other day to a story about nutsos who were accusing Atheists of using Chemtrails to poison Angels.

/not going to debate how 'Atheists' would have to *believe* in Angels in order to poison them.  It only has to make sense inside of a completely deranged mind.  And this is coming from a fan of 'Supernatural'.
 
2013-10-09 06:01:15 PM  

Karac: I would imagine that they believe in the gods, but don't consider them to be truly divine.
After all, what does a god need with a home security system? Especially one that's broke.
After all, you don't see any of those guys stealing from Lord Ao


Fair points. Especially the last one(at least for FR).

TheBigJerk: Like the athar, they consider the gods to be false and merely powerful, manipulative, (and exploitable) beings.


Also a fair point, although in the world of D&D, atheism is kinda a demonstrably false belief. But then, the player has the 3rd person view that the character does not. Though I am curious, as Karac pointed out, what they'd make of beings like Ao.
 
2013-10-10 12:56:45 AM  

Karac: armoredbulldozer: mediablitz: Rub some dirt on it.

Well, the assumption that we need to "replace ObamaCare with something else" is idiotic.  Get rid of ObamaCare, and slowly tweak the present system to slowly mold it into something better and manageable.  Start by letting insurance companies do business across state lines in whichever state has the loosest regulations and allows them to screw over customers the most..

You know your idea to replace Obamacare is bad when not even WND will agree with you.


Companies would NEVER screw consumers like that! And if they did, the Invisible Hand of the Free Market would fix everything!

^- That is what Republicans actually believe.
 
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