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(Time)   Washington hasn't seen a weaker hand than John Boehner's since Bob Dole was in the Senate   (swampland.time.com) divider line 41
    More: Obvious, Senate, Boehner, House Republicans, credible threat, reasonable man  
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1262 clicks; posted to Politics » on 08 Oct 2013 at 9:29 AM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



41 Comments   (+0 »)
   
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest
 
2013-10-08 09:30:51 AM  
Bob Dole cries in shame at what the Republicans have become. You know it, Bob Dole knows it, and the American people know it.
 
2013-10-08 09:33:15 AM  

Obama's Reptiloid Master: Bob Dole cries in shame at what the Republicans have become. You know it, Bob Dole knows it, and the American people know it.


Getting you Bob Dole and Ross Perot caricatures mixed up?
 
2013-10-08 09:33:41 AM  
It's only a weak hand if you believe the Boehner's not willing to stand back and watch it all burn. I used to think that was the case, but I'm no longer sure. Regardless, I think we're going to play these stupid farky-fark games right up to the last second.
 
2013-10-08 09:35:16 AM  

incendi: It's only a weak hand if you believe the Boehner's not willing to stand back and watch it all burn. I used to think that was the case, but I'm no longer sure. Regardless, I think we're going to play these stupid farky-fark games right up to the last second.


I called that last week. They will hold everything and pass a CR/Debt-ceiling all at once. It's a bit easier, politically, on Boehner to fold once instead of folding twice in two weeks.
 
2013-10-08 09:35:55 AM  
On a good day the Democrats hate Boehner more than the Tea Party does.  Unfortunately we haven't had a good day in along while.
 
2013-10-08 09:36:20 AM  
I just realized that Boener sounds a lot like Boner.
 
2013-10-08 09:36:24 AM  

kidgenius: I called that last week. They will hold everything and pass a CR/Debt-ceiling all at once. It's a bit easier, politically, on Boehner to fold once instead of folding twice in two weeks.


I hope so. I think that assumption is what's holding the market together right now.
 
2013-10-08 09:37:27 AM  

incendi: I think we're going to play these stupid farky-fark games right up to the last second.


Yes, Boehner's only play is to let it get right up to the edge. Which I would be okay with if he wasn't so farking incompetent and had no control over his caucus.

I blame part of this on earmarks disappearing, that was the grease that kept the wheels turning. I think the answer is to go to the "top two from the primaries run in the general, regardless of party" system that California adopted.

/oh and +1 for subby's headline, well played
 
2013-10-08 09:37:48 AM  
Card game analogies don't work here. In this game, if you call Boner's bluff, everybody loses. What kind of game is that?
 
2013-10-08 09:37:56 AM  

incendi: It's only a weak hand if you believe the Boehner's not willing to stand back and watch it all burn. I used to think that was the case, but I'm no longer sure. Regardless, I think we're going to play these stupid farky-fark games right up to the last second.


I don't see Boehner as a Nero-type who is willing to stand back and watch it all burn. He's more like that one dumb kid on the playground who will try anything if people threaten to call him a wuss. It just never occurs to him that doing that sort of stupid shiat proves that he's a wuss.
 
2013-10-08 09:38:52 AM  
i.imgur.com
 
2013-10-08 09:39:43 AM  

oryx: Card game analogies don't work here. In this game, if you call Boner's bluff, everybody loses. What kind of game is that?


We generally don't refer to that as a "game", so much as a "hostage situation".
 
2013-10-08 09:39:49 AM  

oryx: Card game analogies don't work here. In this game, if you call Boner's bluff, everybody loses. What kind of game is that?


Yeah, it's much easier to ride a bluff out to the bitter end when you're not playing with your own money.
 
2013-10-08 09:40:44 AM  
Turns out that giant sucking sound Ross Perot warned us about was the sound of John Boner's lips around Tea Bagger schlong.
 
2013-10-08 09:41:43 AM  

Zeno-25: [i.imgur.com image 618x415]


That almost looks like a chicken on the left. Couldn't be though, otherwise it'd be bleeding from the farking it's received lately.
 
2013-10-08 09:42:32 AM  
Wow, must be a lot of farkers too young to get that, subby.  Major league lol here at least.
 
2013-10-08 09:47:05 AM  

max_pooper: Obama's Reptiloid Master: Bob Dole cries in shame at what the Republicans have become. You know it, Bob Dole knows it, and the American people know it.

Getting you Bob Dole and Ross Perot caricatures mixed up?


Did you see me with a flip chart and pointer?
 
2013-10-08 09:47:29 AM  

MisterRonbo: incendi: I think we're going to play these stupid farky-fark games right up to the last second.

Yes, Boehner's only play is to let it get right up to the edge. Which I would be okay with if he wasn't so farking incompetent and had no control over his caucus.

I blame part of this on earmarks disappearing, that was the grease that kept the wheels turning. I think the answer is to go to the "top two from the primaries run in the general, regardless of party" system that California adopted.

/oh and +1 for subby's headline, well played


Political positioning that requires precision driving by a drunk driver.

Sweeeeeet.
 
2013-10-08 09:50:40 AM  
The only Bob Dole I really ever liked was "3rd Person Bob Dole", but busting on his busted hand is tough stuff. I cry a little for him, and of course I cry for what the Red Cross had to endure under the leadership of Elizabeth Dole.
 
2013-10-08 09:54:32 AM  
That's pretty low, Subby. I may not like Dole much, but making fun of war injuries is pretty taboo.
 
2013-10-08 09:58:55 AM  

incendi: It's only a weak hand if you believe the Boehner's not willing to stand back and watch it all burn. I used to think that was the case, but I'm no longer sure. Regardless, I think we're going to play these stupid farky-fark games right up to the last second.


I'm beginning to agree.

Boehner knows that he's done as a Speaker and he knows that this battle is doomed.

He can fold and be forgotten in history or take a stand. Even a losing heroic pose, in his opinion, then a losing forfeit.
 
2013-10-08 09:59:51 AM  

LazarusLong42: That's pretty low, Subby. I may not like Dole much, but making fun of war injuries is pretty taboo.


I'm slow this morning.  I just got it.
 
2013-10-08 10:01:07 AM  
Obama's bluffing?

Sounds like they're trying to be fair and balanced.

I'd keep track of which media outlets have this story all wrong, but it appears to be most of them.
 
2013-10-08 10:02:26 AM  

GoldSpider: Wow, must be a lot of farkers too young to get that, subby.  Major league lol here at least.


It should be funny, but I have a picture of Bob Dole in my mind that blocks out all feeling.
 
2013-10-08 10:05:07 AM  

Zeno-25: [i.imgur.com image 618x415]


Wow.  This might be the only time that it is credible that the chicken did the farking.
 
2013-10-08 10:06:15 AM  

DeaH: incendi: It's only a weak hand if you believe the Boehner's not willing to stand back and watch it all burn. I used to think that was the case, but I'm no longer sure. Regardless, I think we're going to play these stupid farky-fark games right up to the last second.

I don't see Boehner as a Nero-type who is willing to stand back and watch it all burn. He's more like that one dumb kid on the playground who will try anything if people threaten to call him a wuss. It just never occurs to him that doing that sort of stupid shiat proves that he's a wuss.


Boehner can't do anything in the House because if he wanted to enact real legislation he'd have to do it by throwing the Tea Party under the bus (as they entirely deserve). He's close enough of a hardliner that if he did that he'd lose the hardline conservative vote within his caucus and would be pushed out of the leadership position, which is the same thing as a vote of no confidence, and Boehner would pretty much be a has-been.

I love that he decided to go toe to toe with Obama on this though because Obama's not gonna budge - nor should he.

My feeling is that this problem would entirely disappear if a couple of billionaires entirely disappeared.
 
2013-10-08 10:07:53 AM  

Marcus Aurelius: GoldSpider: Wow, must be a lot of farkers too young to get that, subby.  Major league lol here at least.

It should be funny, but I have a picture of Bob Dole in my mind that blocks out all feeling.


Is Viagra involved?
 
2013-10-08 10:09:21 AM  
www.rotodesign.com

Looks pretty strong to me.
 
2013-10-08 10:21:49 AM  
Stupid, and beholden to malevolent idiots is not the same as weak.
 
2013-10-08 10:28:58 AM  

SilentStrider: Marcus Aurelius: GoldSpider: Wow, must be a lot of farkers too young to get that, subby.  Major league lol here at least.

It should be funny, but I have a picture of Bob Dole in my mind that blocks out all feeling.

Is Viagra involved?


OK, the feeling just came back.  And not in a good way.
 
2013-10-08 10:41:13 AM  

LazarusLong42: That's pretty low, Subby. I may not like Dole much, but making fun of war injuries is pretty taboo.


Yeah, I wish someone had told George Bush's campaign that, when Bush came out with his, "Hey, look at me! I'm playing catch with a baseball! I can do that, because I'm not a cripple!" ads. Not quite as despicable as his kid's campaign against McCain, but close.
 
2013-10-08 10:44:30 AM  
burn it all down
 
2013-10-08 10:54:29 AM  

rumpelstiltskin: LazarusLong42: That's pretty low, Subby. I may not like Dole much, but making fun of war injuries is pretty taboo.

Yeah, I wish someone had told George Bush's campaign that, when Bush came out with his, "Hey, look at me! I'm playing catch with a baseball! I can do that, because I'm not a cripple!" ads. Not quite as despicable as his kid's campaign against McCain, but close.


That campaign Rove perpetrated agaist McCain in South Carolina changed the course of history significantly. It is one of the most despicable acts of politics in the modern era.
 
2013-10-08 11:08:33 AM  

LazarusLong42: rumpelstiltskin: LazarusLong42: That's pretty low, Subby. I may not like Dole much, but making fun of war injuries is pretty taboo.

Yeah, I wish someone had told George Bush's campaign that, when Bush came out with his, "Hey, look at me! I'm playing catch with a baseball! I can do that, because I'm not a cripple!" ads. Not quite as despicable as his kid's campaign against McCain, but close.

That campaign Rove perpetrated agaist McCain in South Carolina changed the course of history significantly. It is one of the most despicable acts of politics in the modern era.


It dovetailed nicely into the Florida / Supreme Court debacle.
 
2013-10-08 11:24:05 AM  
MAIN GATE AND HALL - OBAMA'S WHITE HOUSE

Noisily, the main gate lifts to flood the blackness with blinding light and reveal the silhouetted figure of Ted Cruz. He is clad in a robe similar to Reagan's and carries neither bible nor constitution. Ted strides purposefully into the hallway. Two Democrats move to block Ted's path. Ted halts.

Ted raises his hand and points at the puzzled Democrats, who immediately lower their little red books and fall back. The young Tea Party Republican lowers his hand and moves on down the hallway.

Harry Reid appears out of the gloom. He speaks to Ted as they approach each other, but Ted doesn't stop and Reid must reverse his direction and hurry alongside the young Tea Party Republican in order to carry on the conversation. Several other Democrats fall in behind them in the darkness.

TED
I must speak with Obama.

Reid answers in Arabic, shaking his head in denial. Ted stops and stares at Reid; he raises his hand slightly.

TED
You will take me to Obama now!

Reid turns in hypnotic response to Ted's command, and Ted follows him into the gloom.

TED
You serve your master well.

REID responds.

TED
And you will be rewarded.

OBAMA'S THRONE ROOM

Obama is asleep on his throne, with Lady Liberty lying in front of him. The Mainstream Media sits by Obama's tail, watching it wriggle. Lady Liberty is now dressed in the skimpy costume of a dancing girl; a chain runs from a manacle/necklace at her throat to her new master, Obama the Kenyan. Boehner stands behind Obama as Reid comes up to the gangster slug.

BOEHNER
At last! Ted's come to rescue me.

REID
Master.

Obama awakens with a start and Reid continues, in Arabic.

REID
...Ted Cruz, Tea Party Republican.

OBAMA (in Arabic subtitled)
I told you not to admit him.

TED
I must be allowed to speak.

REID (in Arabic subtitled)
He must be allowed to speak.

Obama, furious, clobbers Reid and shoves him away.

OBAMA (in Arabic subtitled)
You weak-minded fool! He's using an old Tea Party mind trick.

Ted stares hard at Obama.

TED
You will bring a bill defunding Obamacare and bringing spending under control to me.

OBAMA (in Arabic subtitled)
Your mind powers will not work on me, boy.

TED
Nevertheless, I'm defunding Obamacare and its unconstitutional mandate. You can either profit by this... or be destroyed! It's your choice. But I warn you not to underestimate my powers.

Obama's laugh is mean and loud. Boehner attempts to warn Ted about the pit.

BOEHNER
Ted, you're standing on...

OBAMA (in Arabic subtitled)
There will be no bargain, young Republican. I shall enjoy watching you die.

The rest, is history.
 
2013-10-08 11:41:56 AM  

vygramul: The rest, is history.


Wonderful! My eyes teared up!
 
2013-10-08 11:52:30 AM  

LazarusLong42: rumpelstiltskin: LazarusLong42: That's pretty low, Subby. I may not like Dole much, but making fun of war injuries is pretty taboo.

Yeah, I wish someone had told George Bush's campaign that, when Bush came out with his, "Hey, look at me! I'm playing catch with a baseball! I can do that, because I'm not a cripple!" ads. Not quite as despicable as his kid's campaign against McCain, but close.

That campaign Rove perpetrated agaist McCain in South Carolina changed the course of history significantly. It is one of the most despicable acts of politics in the modern era.


And the fact that McCain is still a Republican to this day tells me all I need to know about him.
 
2013-10-08 12:12:23 PM  

GoldSpider: Wow, must be a lot of farkers too young to get that, subby.  Major league lol here at least.


This, high five! Now give me ten, Bob...uh, nevermind
 
2013-10-08 12:54:20 PM  
I would have gone with,

There hasn't been a boehner this weak in congress since Bob Dole did those viagra commercials.
 
2013-10-08 02:11:08 PM  

Zeno-25: [i.imgur.com image 618x415]


I raise you a Luckovich.

blogs.ajc.com
 
2013-10-08 05:19:26 PM  
To think, that cripple tried to run for President.  Imagine! A crippled president!  What's next, a Catholic?
 
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