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(Daily Mail)   Gaydar: Bahrain, Kuwait, Qatar, Oman, Saudi Arabia and the UAE plan to introduce medical testing on travelers to 'detect' gay people and stop them from entering   (dailymail.co.uk) divider line 231
    More: Misc, Oman, United Arab Emirates, Saudi Arabia, Kuwait, Qatar, Gulf Cooperation Council, penal codes, Episcopal Church  
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7915 clicks; posted to Main » on 07 Oct 2013 at 8:47 PM (39 weeks ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



231 Comments   (+0 »)
   
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2013-10-07 09:14:24 PM

gja: mjjt: They are using those wands that also detect suicide bombers

It has a "machine that goes 'beep' function"

[blackholesandstars.files.wordpress.com image 256x195]

It's 'ping' old boy, not 'beep'.


Ah, I see you have the machine that goes 'ping!'. This is my favorite. You see, we lease this back from the company we sold it to - that way it comes under the monthly current budget and not the capital account.
 
2013-10-07 09:15:58 PM
The only way a doctor can certify medical gayness in a man is if the penis is found to be literally inserted into the anus or rectum of another man during the examination. Medical gayness in a woman is much easier to prove - if she does not sleep with you, she is a lesbian.
 
2013-10-07 09:16:51 PM
So, if one of the 'inspectors' tastes shiat on your dick, you're not allowed in?
 
2013-10-07 09:17:06 PM
Well, if homosexuality is innate and unchangeable, then presumably it's caused by some biological feature that could -- theoretically at least -- be tested for.  In all probability it would be too subtle for current technology though.  ...but who knows?  I have no idea what research has been published on the topic, if any.  For obvious reasons it would be highly non-PC to even investigate the topic, regardless of the findings.
 
2013-10-07 09:17:45 PM
Damn, all of the multitudes of gay people wanting to enter Saudi Arabia will have to find some other place with no beer and lots of sand.
 
2013-10-07 09:18:04 PM
Our allies, ladies and gentlemen.
 
2013-10-07 09:20:09 PM

AverageAmericanGuy: This wouldn't be something you could test for unless there was something physically different about homosexuals.


Allegedly, homosexuals are born homosexuals. The Bedouin savages must have found the gene and some kind of cobalt-thiocyanate-esque reagent. Hopefully they'll test their own citizens, too.
 
2013-10-07 09:20:09 PM

jshine: Well, if homosexuality is innate and unchangeable, then presumably it's caused by some biological feature that could -- theoretically at least -- be tested for.  In all probability it would be too subtle for current technology though.  ...but who knows?  I have no idea what research has been published on the topic, if any.  For obvious reasons it would be highly non-PC to even investigate the topic, regardless of the findings.


A lot of closeted Republicans and Catholics suddenly change their travel itineraries.
 
2013-10-07 09:20:21 PM

you are a puppet: tekmo: Imagine the outrage if any nation introduced testing on travelers to detect Muslims for the purpose of barring their entry.

Imagine if hamburgers ate you!


In their defense, I am delicious.
 
2013-10-07 09:20:25 PM
Remember, this is the part of the world that enthusiastically bought fake bomb detectors and still use them.
 
gja [TotalFark]
2013-10-07 09:21:19 PM

Snarfangel: Damn, all of the multitudes of gay people wanting to enter Saudi Arabia will have to find some other place with no beer and lots of sand.


Highlighted for emphasis on FAIL. 100+ farking degrees and no beer?
3.bp.blogspot.com
 
2013-10-07 09:21:32 PM

Gyrfalcon: Okay.

Next time you get invaded by someone, we won't bother sending US troops to protect you.


Allow me to repeat something I said in 1990: fark Kuwait.  It was, and is, a nation of misogynistic, homophobic, thieving asshats.
 
2013-10-07 09:21:34 PM
media.boreme.com
 
ecl
2013-10-07 09:21:43 PM

TommyymmoT: So, if one of the 'inspectors' tastes shiat on your dick, you're not allowed in?


I heard he licks the inside of the butt for dick residue.
 
2013-10-07 09:21:44 PM
I never understood why anyone gives a fark what sexual preference someone has
 
2013-10-07 09:22:39 PM

tekmo: Imagine the outrage if any nation introduced testing on travelers to detect Muslims for the purpose of barring their entry.


Oh, come on, any man might have calluses on their knees.
 
2013-10-07 09:23:21 PM

studebaker hoch: What a joke.

Arabs are some of the hottest gays anywhere.


It's sorta true. I knew this guy from Yemen, gay as the day is long and he even was working as a DJ in gay bar but his dad back in Yemen arranged a marriage for him and he couldn't say no. Somehow he was still a devout Muslim, hell, he wouldn't even drink alcohol, believe me I tried. What? It's weird drinking around people that aren't drinking. Mostly because they make fun of you later because they remember how drunk and stupid you got : /
 
2013-10-07 09:23:25 PM
I'm wondering what they've figured out that the rest of the world hasn't, in terms of testing.

I'm also wondering if, like so many backwards countries, their definition of gay is something preposterous.  You know the spiel, it's only gay if you're the bottom, it's only gay if you kiss, it's only gay if you dress in womens' clothes, etc.  It's not gay if you fark another dude.  It's not gay if you fark a young boy.  It's not gay if you talk about chicks while you do it. That sort of bull poopie.
 
2013-10-07 09:24:11 PM

studebaker hoch: What a joke.

Arabs are some of the hottest gays anywhere.


That's what happens when you live in a flaming desert.
 
2013-10-07 09:24:25 PM
Anybody know where I can buy a couple thousand high tech looking boxes with lots of LED's, some switches, a random number generator and a sensing wand?

I want to bid on the gay-detector contract.
 
gja [TotalFark]
2013-10-07 09:25:00 PM

machoprogrammer: I never understood why anyone gives a fark what sexual preference someone has


Religion. The 'never-changing-never-adapting-mind-so-closed-it's-like-a-DMV-after-5p m' type.
 
2013-10-07 09:25:13 PM
If you can felch the rhinestone-studded collar (from the Audrey Hepburn Pets Collection) off my gerbil
who is wedged inside my bunghole tighter than a breech-babied Chilean miner ....

i.perezhilton.com

then you might be a homosexual.
 
2013-10-07 09:25:32 PM

fusillade762: [www.gay-test.com image 750x577]



I noticed the guy in the background, but I don't think it means I'm gay, I think it means I'm racist.

/Stay away from our wimmin!
 
2013-10-07 09:25:42 PM

sgnilward: AverageAmericanGuy: This wouldn't be something you could test for unless there was something physically different about homosexuals.

They'll see if their dicks taste like shiat


Just had this mental image of some guy, on his knees at customs:
Zip, lick, "clear"
Zip, lick, "clear"
Zip, lick, gags "caught one"
Looks up, "meh, it's a living"
Zip, lick, "clear"
 
2013-10-07 09:26:21 PM
Think about it this way:

Gulf States make this gay test to keep people out. The science is.. well, not real. But them reserving the right to refuse entry to whoever they want has certain advantages.

I'm surprised that no one has posted the infinitely more likely reason they're doing this: They want to be able to refuse entry to their country to any person on their whim. If they call them gay on the way out - they don't care. You have political ideas we don't like? He tested positive. A religion we don't like? Super positive. Anything from a labor activist, to someone who is just totally openly gay, and they can boot you. It's super simple, and I doubt the populace is going to be up in arms about keeping people out who they are being told are gay.

I don't know why the Daily Fail left off Uganda and Palestine as countries that also punish being gay with death... I'm sure there's even more countries to boot. Maybe they hit their word limit.

/my two cents.
 
gja [TotalFark]
2013-10-07 09:26:53 PM

mr_a: Anybody know where I can buy a couple thousand high tech looking boxes with lots of LED's, some switches, a random number generator and a sensing wand?

I want to bid on the gay-detector contract.


Dude, we can go into biz together. You raise the VC,I will production-line a series of models.
For LULZ we can make 1 that actually goes off when it detects hummus or cous-cous farts.
 
2013-10-07 09:27:43 PM
But camel- and sheep-farking are ok, right?
 
2013-10-07 09:28:02 PM

Researcher: I'm surprised that no one has posted the infinitely more likely reason they're doing this: They want to be able to refuse entry to their country to any person on their whim.


Any country can do this, the US included.  Having a visa doesn't guarantee you entry, but having *no* visa does guarantee you'll be turned away.
 
2013-10-07 09:28:51 PM
This from a culture known for farking little boys?
 
2013-10-07 09:29:20 PM

FrancoFile: But camel- and sheep-farking are ok, right?


No sir, they usually ride the camel into town and get a whore.
 
gja [TotalFark]
2013-10-07 09:29:22 PM

FrancoFile: But camel- and sheep-farking are ok, right?


C'mere, big boy, once you go sheep, you'll never be able to sleep!
1.bp.blogspot.com
 
2013-10-07 09:30:13 PM

FrancoFile: But camel- and sheep-farking are ok, right?


i15.photobucket.com
 
2013-10-07 09:30:40 PM
Gaydar only tells you if someone is gay.


You need a Homometer to measure exactly how gay that person is.
 
2013-10-07 09:31:07 PM
seattletimes.com
 
2013-10-07 09:31:22 PM
I'll say the same thing I said in the thread about this that got red-lit.

Is this test comparable to the eunuch test from History of the World Part 1?
 
2013-10-07 09:31:59 PM

ciberido: Gyrfalcon: Okay.

Next time you get invaded by someone, we won't bother sending US troops to protect you.

Allow me to repeat something I said in 1990: fark Kuwait.  It was, and is, a nation of misogynistic, homophobic, thieving asshats.


Indeed, first war I ever protested (I was young,foolish), I learned how much good that does.
 
2013-10-07 09:32:03 PM

Gyrfalcon: Okay.

Next time you get invaded by someone, we won't bother sending US troops to protect you.


Oil trumps gay.  At least for now.
 
2013-10-07 09:32:26 PM

TuteTibiImperes: tekmo: Imagine the outrage if any nation introduced testing on travelers to detect Muslims for the purpose of barring their entry.

Well, Saudi Arabia is already on that, but in reverse - you can't enter Mecca unless you're Muslim.


There's a temple in Kathmandu that wont allow non-Hindus to enter.  But it's really just one building in the entire complex.
 
2013-10-07 09:33:23 PM

alabasterblack: Gyrfalcon: Okay.

Next time you get invaded by someone, we won't bother sending US troops to protect you.

Oil trumps gay.  At least for now.


Say what you want about fracking, at least it allows us to start telling the Middle East to frack off.
 
2013-10-07 09:33:26 PM

alabasterblack: Gyrfalcon: Okay.

Next time you get invaded by someone, we won't bother sending US troops to protect you.

Oil trumps gay.  At least for now.


Indeed.  Gay oil wells just produce mud.
 
2013-10-07 09:33:41 PM
It's raining Yemen.
 
2013-10-07 09:33:50 PM
Next!

Sorry, your blood test came back gay. You will have to leave.

Next!

Congratulations, your blood test came back stupid but NOT gay. Welcome to the modern and enlightened kingdom of Saudi Arabia where the punishment for Mohammed jokes is death. Here's your whip for flogging women, if you spot any.

Next!
 
2013-10-07 09:34:58 PM
Someone should be clear, decisive and up-front.  Since all you homos are too scared to say it, here goes.  There is currently no test that will definitely detect whether someone is gay or not.
 
2013-10-07 09:35:13 PM

Quantum Apostrophe: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Fruit_machine_%28homosexuality_test%29

Check eBay?


Fruit Machine?

www.thedrum.com
 
2013-10-07 09:35:29 PM

Gyrfalcon: Okay.

Next time you get invaded by someone, we won't bother sending US troops to protect you.


What are you, some kind of namby-pamby nice guy? I say any oil-based country that homo-hating should get liberated and their camels shipped to Arizona.
 
2013-10-07 09:35:30 PM

TommyymmoT: So, if one of the 'inspectors' tastes shiat on your dick, you're not allowed in?


Mentullam caco.
/that is all
 
2013-10-07 09:36:36 PM
Who ever is selling these gaydars to the Saudis must be the same guys who sold the mine detectors to the Iraqis.
 
2013-10-07 09:36:50 PM

RussianPooper: FrancoFile: But camel- and sheep-farking are ok, right?

No sir, they usually ride the camel into town and get a whore.


A 12 year old male one.
 
2013-10-07 09:39:25 PM
matrixresources.files.wordpress.com
 
2013-10-07 09:40:01 PM

tekmo: Imagine the outrage if any nation introduced testing on travelers to detect Muslims for the purpose of barring their entry.


Being Muslim is a choice.
 
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