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(Rocketnews 24)   Final assignment from dearly departed teacher. Uh, teacher, we're gonna need some extra time with all this dust in the air   (en.rocketnews24.com) divider line 49
    More: Sad, homework  
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14460 clicks; posted to Main » on 06 Oct 2013 at 2:53 AM (27 weeks ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



49 Comments   (+0 »)
   
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest
 
2013-10-06 12:31:32 AM
Sounds fake to me. But I'm a cynical a-hole
 
2013-10-06 12:31:36 AM
Boobies.

This is only a test.
 
2013-10-06 12:32:18 AM

Peter von Nostrand: Sounds fake to me. But I'm a cynical a-hole


Dammit, you messed up my test.
 
2013-10-06 02:11:03 AM
image1.findagrave.com

/dnrtfa
 
2013-10-06 02:55:37 AM
Did the teacher die of natural causes or commit suicide? Post is lax on details.
 
2013-10-06 02:56:53 AM
He who fly upside down liable to have crack up.
 
2013-10-06 02:59:47 AM
"I'll be waiting for you."

Urban Legend:

The students from that class now have to find happiness everyday, or else, the spirit of their dead teacher will haunt them.
 
2013-10-06 03:13:17 AM
What, no Hero tag?
 
2013-10-06 03:39:41 AM
I suppose it's less terrifying than if he asked them to seek out dark magic in an effort to bring himself back from the other side.
 
2013-10-06 03:42:11 AM
Mr White, my chemistry teacher in New Mexico wouldn't even give me 2 lousy points on my chemistry test when I made a 58. 2 freaking points between passing and failing. When I asked him to "let it go just this one time", he told me "not to try and bullsh*t a bullshi*tter". You think I cried when he died? And the best part, later we found out he was some kind of drug dealer. Karma is a biatch, man. He's dead, and I'm still gonna get my GED.Now who's the 'dumbass', Mr White?
 
2013-10-06 03:42:35 AM

gnosis301: I suppose it's less terrifying than if he asked them to seek out dark magic in an effort to bring himself back from the other side.


"Find my killer and avenge me"

=Smidge=
 
2013-10-06 03:49:45 AM

DarkSoulNoHope: Did the teacher die of natural causes or commit suicide? Post is lax on details.


According to the Reddit thread it was stomach cancer.

But the other detail that's omitted is whether the teacher was there to give this assignment in person, or if it was a substitute relaying the assignment. Seems unlikely that someone dying of stomach cancer is teaching a class but you never know.
 
2013-10-06 03:59:18 AM
www.funnyonlinepictures.com
 
2013-10-06 04:18:56 AM

Danger Avoid Death: [www.funnyonlinepictures.com image 600x631]


I'll complete number 6.  Number 5 would probably end up with me being in jail.
 
2013-10-06 04:19:08 AM
 
2013-10-06 04:52:02 AM

Dahnkster: Mr White, my chemistry teacher in New Mexico wouldn't even give me 2 lousy points on my chemistry test when I made a 58. 2 freaking points between passing and failing. When I asked him to "let it go just this one time", he told me "not to try and bullsh*t a bullshi*tter". You think I cried when he died? And the best part, later we found out he was some kind of drug dealer. Karma is a biatch, man. He's dead, and I'm still gonna get my GED.Now who's the 'dumbass', Mr White?


You shouldn't lead with New Mexico. Steps on the punchline.
 
2013-10-06 05:06:43 AM

MrSplifferton: Danger Avoid Death: [www.funnyonlinepictures.com image 600x631]

I'll complete number 6.  Number 5 would probably end up with me being in jail.


I've actually managed to accomplish #5.
Took a few years, but the guy who stole the (at the time) love of my life eventually broke up with her, ie she dumped him for being a right bastard and he finally moved out of my building. (Yes, it's a complicated story).
Didn't get me back together with her even though I tried. For the best, would not have ended well.
Oddly enough she's moved back into the neighborhood and the same day I saw her I saw him downtown. Weird karma.

/Use 2 in 1, don't know how I'd accomplish 6.
 
2013-10-06 05:11:00 AM

tjassen: MrSplifferton: Danger Avoid Death: [www.funnyonlinepictures.com image 600x631]

I'll complete number 6.  Number 5 would probably end up with me being in jail.

I've actually managed to accomplish #5.
Took a few years, but the guy who stole the (at the time) love of my life eventually broke up with her, ie she dumped him for being a right bastard and he finally moved out of my building. (Yes, it's a complicated story).
Didn't get me back together with her even though I tried. For the best, would not have ended well.
Oddly enough she's moved back into the neighborhood and the same day I saw her I saw him downtown. Weird karma.

/Use 2 in 1, don't know how I'd accomplish 6.


Even if she was the love of your life, why would you want her back after this dude had her? Damaged goods, man. Damaged goods.
 
2013-10-06 05:17:20 AM

Peter von Nostrand: Sounds fake to me. But I'm a cynical a-hole


I taught in Japanese schools for years, and I vote that you're right. There's not much chance this happened. Sick teachers (this usually includes the merely pregnant) aren't allowed to associate with students in any way. Even if a student commits suicide, their classmates often aren't told if there's some way to hide the fact.

That's not even a Japanese chalkboard in the photo. It looks like a 'shop of a western one (yeah, they're different).

I'm not saying that there's no way that this happened. I'm just saying that it's extremely unlikely, considering the nature of the educational beast there. If it's a true story, YAY.
 
2013-10-06 05:17:56 AM

doglover: Dahnkster: Mr White, my chemistry teacher in New Mexico wouldn't even give me 2 lousy points on my chemistry test when I made a 58. 2 freaking points between passing and failing. When I asked him to "let it go just this one time", he told me "not to try and bullsh*t a bullshi*tter". You think I cried when he died? And the best part, later we found out he was some kind of drug dealer. Karma is a biatch, man. He's dead, and I'm still gonna get my GED.Now who's the 'dumbass', Mr White?

You shouldn't lead with New Mexico. Steps on the punchline.


Dude, leading with "Mr. White, my chemistry teacher" steps on the punchline.  And I never even watched Breaking Bad.
 
2013-10-06 06:27:04 AM

robohobo: tjassen: MrSplifferton: Danger Avoid Death: [www.funnyonlinepictures.com image 600x631]

I'll complete number 6.  Number 5 would probably end up with me being in jail.

I've actually managed to accomplish #5.
Took a few years, but the guy who stole the (at the time) love of my life eventually broke up with her, ie she dumped him for being a right bastard and he finally moved out of my building. (Yes, it's a complicated story).
Didn't get me back together with her even though I tried. For the best, would not have ended well.
Oddly enough she's moved back into the neighborhood and the same day I saw her I saw him downtown. Weird karma.

/Use 2 in 1, don't know how I'd accomplish 6.

Even if she was the love of your life, why would you want her back after this dude had her? Damaged goods, man. Damaged goods.


Exactly. But took me a while to figure it out.
Which is why "love of my life" is in past tense, very much past tense.
And she was hot... like exactly my kind of hot at the time.
But eventually I realized what I took for "eccentric" was general weirdness and wasn't worth the hotness.
Didn't help that none of my friends or family really liked her. But I guess that goes with the territory.
 
2013-10-06 06:48:09 AM

tjassen: robohobo: tjassen: MrSplifferton: Danger Avoid Death: [www.funnyonlinepictures.com image 600x631]

I'll complete number 6.  Number 5 would probably end up with me being in jail.

I've actually managed to accomplish #5.
Took a few years, but the guy who stole the (at the time) love of my life eventually broke up with her, ie she dumped him for being a right bastard and he finally moved out of my building. (Yes, it's a complicated story).
Didn't get me back together with her even though I tried. For the best, would not have ended well.
Oddly enough she's moved back into the neighborhood and the same day I saw her I saw him downtown. Weird karma.

/Use 2 in 1, don't know how I'd accomplish 6.

Even if she was the love of your life, why would you want her back after this dude had her? Damaged goods, man. Damaged goods.

Exactly. But took me a while to figure it out.
Which is why "love of my life" is in past tense, very much past tense.
And she was hot... like exactly my kind of hot at the time.
But eventually I realized what I took for "eccentric" was general weirdness and wasn't worth the hotness.
Didn't help that none of my friends or family really liked her. But I guess that goes with the territory.


crazyhotscale.jpg
 
2013-10-06 06:58:44 AM

impaler: If this doesn't make you want to cry, you have no heart.


That was interesting.

/Didn't cry
 
2013-10-06 07:00:44 AM

gnosis301: I suppose it's less terrifying than if he asked them to seek out dark magic in an effort to bring himself back from the other side.


1.bp.blogspot.com
 
2013-10-06 07:01:44 AM
This thread epitomizes everything wrong with fark and farkers in general.

/you guys are cynical a-holes, hilarious
 
2013-10-06 07:05:33 AM

impaler: If this doesn't make you want to cry, you have no heart.



s18.postimg.org
/I'll see you and raise you a Hatchi
 
2013-10-06 07:12:47 AM

Dahnkster: Mr White, my chemistry teacher in New Mexico wouldn't even give me 2 lousy points on my chemistry test when I made a 58. 2 freaking points between passing and failing. When I asked him to "let it go just this one time", he told me "not to try and bullsh*t a bullshi*tter". You think I cried when he died? And the best part, later we found out he was some kind of drug dealer. Karma is a biatch, man. He's dead, and I'm still gonna get my GED.Now who's the 'dumbass', Mr White?


Let it go, Jesse.
 
2013-10-06 07:50:41 AM

impaler: If this doesn't make you want to cry, you have no heart.


I was bored about 10 minutes into that lecture. I don't need a terminally ill cancer patient who found meaning in life to tell me how to achieve my "dreams".
/is he kill yet?
 
2013-10-06 08:03:46 AM

DarkSoulNoHope: Did the teacher die of natural causes or commit suicide? Post is lax on details.


It's an exercise left to the students.
 
2013-10-06 08:30:15 AM

DubyaHater: impaler: If this doesn't make you want to cry, you have no heart.

I was bored about 10 minutes into that lecture. I don't need a terminally ill cancer patient who found meaning in life to tell me how to achieve my "dreams".
/is he kill yet?


I don't say this very often, but... I thought maybe, just maybe (even though you hate the poor and disabled) that perhaps you might have some redeeming quality. I was wrong.

I hope one day you find some way to be less like a miserable old fart in life.
 
2013-10-06 08:31:04 AM
The teacher in question:
erikavanr.files.wordpress.com
 
2013-10-06 08:49:52 AM

tjassen: robohobo: tjassen: MrSplifferton: Danger Avoid Death: [www.funnyonlinepictures.com image 600x631]

I'll complete number 6.  Number 5 would probably end up with me being in jail.

I've actually managed to accomplish #5.
Took a few years, but the guy who stole the (at the time) love of my life eventually broke up with her, ie she dumped him for being a right bastard and he finally moved out of my building. (Yes, it's a complicated story).
Didn't get me back together with her even though I tried. For the best, would not have ended well.
Oddly enough she's moved back into the neighborhood and the same day I saw her I saw him downtown. Weird karma.

/Use 2 in 1, don't know how I'd accomplish 6.

Even if she was the love of your life, why would you want her back after this dude had her? Damaged goods, man. Damaged goods.

Exactly. But took me a while to figure it out.
Which is why "love of my life" is in past tense, very much past tense.
And she was hot... like exactly my kind of hot at the time.
But eventually I realized what I took for "eccentric" was general weirdness and wasn't worth the hotness.
Didn't help that none of my friends or family really liked her. But I guess that goes with the territory.


It is strange the the "love of my life" was also disliked by my friends and family. He wound up leaving me for another woman who eventually dumped him. We became "friends" (according to him anyway) and he told me the story of how he told her off and included the fact that she ruined my life. I quickly told him that it was he who decided to fark her and no one ruined my life - it may have changed it dramatically but it was far from ruined.

Now he has some rare cancer and feels the need to text me to talk about life and such. I don't have the heart to be mean to him but I am glad that it is over and I am not dealing with his dumbass anymore.
 
2013-10-06 08:51:59 AM
The students don't have to answer to this guy.  By the time they do see each other, their school lives will be long behind them.  Now someone like James Ryan, yes a fictional character but he's just an example, has someone to answer to.  Several men died to see him get home in one piece, so when that former hs teacher told him to earn it.  He has those men to answer to.

/parable
 
2013-10-06 09:03:09 AM
But what if my landlord said the rent is late and he may have to litigate?
 
2013-10-06 09:05:29 AM

HindiDiscoMonster: impaler: If this doesn't make you want to cry, you have no heart.


[s18.postimg.org image 425x244]
/I'll see you and raise you a Hatchi


Fry's not coming back...
 
2013-10-06 09:22:49 AM
24.media.tumblr.com
 
2013-10-06 09:32:54 AM

Precious Roy's Horse Dividers: /dnrtfa


Dammit. What movie was that from? My google-fu is off this morning.
 
2013-10-06 10:13:09 AM

Cubs300: Precious Roy's Horse Dividers: /dnrtfa

Dammit. What movie was that from? My google-fu is off this morning.


It's not from a movie.  That's Steven Gilborn as Mr. Collins in The Wonder Years.
 
2013-10-06 10:33:57 AM

Peter von Nostrand: Sounds fake to me. But I'm a cynical a-hole


Yup.  The "message" actually translates as "Thank you very much Mr. Roboto for helping me escape, just when I needed to."  It's true.
 
2013-10-06 10:53:18 AM

DarkSoulNoHope: Did the teacher die of natural causes or commit suicide? Post is lax on details.


From the wording it's pretty obvious he was terminally ill.  Whether he hastened the end or not doesn't really matter.
 
2013-10-06 10:55:41 AM

djones101: Cubs300: Precious Roy's Horse Dividers: /dnrtfa

Dammit. What movie was that from? My google-fu is off this morning.

It's not from a movie.  That's Steven Gilborn as Mr. Collins in The Wonder Years.


Thank you for that...one of those shows from my childhood that hit way too close to home.  I remember that story line being tough to watch.
 
2013-10-06 11:21:02 AM

HindiDiscoMonster: DubyaHater: impaler: If this doesn't make you want to cry, you have no heart.

I was bored about 10 minutes into that lecture. I don't need a terminally ill cancer patient who found meaning in life to tell me how to achieve my "dreams".
/is he kill yet?

I don't say this very often, but... I thought maybe, just maybe (even though you hate the poor and disabled) that perhaps you might have some redeeming quality. I was wrong.

I hope one day you find some way to be less like a miserable old fart in life.


I started watching and really enjoyed it. I don't have time to watch it now, so I saved it for enjoyment later today. Thank you Impaler for putting it up here.
 
2013-10-06 11:26:46 AM

Fast Moon: [24.media.tumblr.com image 500x288]


I am still trying to figure out the point of these gifs. With only a few frames of animation, it looks more like that guy is saying "agent stepmom". And the fact it's an animation of a guy just looking right into the camera and talking (no other action) doesn't really add anything over just a static image with a caption.

I guess the internets are just weird.
 
2013-10-06 12:57:34 PM

gnosis301: I suppose it's less terrifying than if he asked them to seek out dark magic in an effort to bring himself back from the other side.


Was that wrong?  Should I not have done that?
 
2013-10-06 04:12:16 PM

Precious Roy's Horse Dividers: [image1.findagrave.com image 240x180]

/dnrtfa


Clicked on this article looking for Wonder Years Mr. Collins reference, leaving in a nostalgic, bittersweet but satisfied mood.
 
2013-10-06 05:10:48 PM
Felt so vindicated when the Weeners on the original Japanese blog post was "五千せ?" Come on, teacher, 幸 is one of the easiest kanji to write.
 
2013-10-06 11:44:38 PM
I just went to visit my best friend (who now lives out of state), his wife and their five-year-old boy (my godson).

I asked my friend, "Have you had 'The Talk' with him yet?"

My friend looked confused and asked, "Which talk is that? He's only five."

I said, "It's never too early to have the 'if bad people ever kill mommy and daddy, avenge our deaths' talk."

They sat down that night as father and son and had a talk. Presumably, it was the "why you shouldn't take anything your godfather says too seriously" talk.
 
2013-10-07 09:43:00 AM
3.bp.blogspot.com
 
2013-10-07 02:29:50 PM
That's it?  That's the best he could do?
 
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