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(Washington Post)   Ted Cruz's world is crumbling like a sack of cards stacked on dominoes that have fallen in the forest   (washingtonpost.com) divider line 58
    More: Sad, Ted Cruz, forests  
•       •       •

9230 clicks; posted to Politics » on 03 Oct 2013 at 2:50 PM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



Voting Results (Funniest)
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest


Archived thread
2013-10-03 03:04:24 PM  
11 votes:

I_C_Weener: usernameguy: Checkmate.

[i586.photobucket.com image 250x265]


25.media.tumblr.com
2013-10-03 02:08:35 PM  
10 votes:

Nadie_AZ: I like the jab at Rubio. He disappeared pretty quickly.


He must have been thirsty.
2013-10-03 02:28:22 PM  
7 votes:
I enjoy hearing about Ted Cruz getting kicked in the balls so much I finished the first Jennifer Rubin article ever.
2013-10-03 02:24:23 PM  
7 votes:

usernameguy: Checkmate.


i586.photobucket.com
2013-10-03 01:34:36 PM  
5 votes:
Checkmate.
2013-10-03 05:44:08 PM  
4 votes:
i232.photobucket.com
2013-10-03 04:29:30 PM  
4 votes:

fortheloveof: am i the only person that thinks cruz looks a bit like the gay tv guy from v for vendetta


Stephen Fry has passed hundreds of turds smarter and with more class than Ted Cruz.
2013-10-03 03:25:23 PM  
4 votes:
Ted Cruz isn't stupid.

He's evil.

Oh, also he's stupid.
2013-10-03 06:06:23 PM  
3 votes:
Ted Cruz, you made me agree with Jennifer Rubin.  God damn you Sir, GOD DAMN YOU!
2013-10-03 05:40:21 PM  
3 votes:

sendtodave: sendtodave: Slaves2Darkness: Skleenar: sendtodave: The tea party wants the government shut down. The tea party gets what it wants.

Are liberals getting what they want?

Absolutely not.  That's why this isn't time to cave!  This is the time to ADD pressure.

Victory is ours!

"Evacuate? In our moment of triumph? I think you overestimate their chances."

In this case, the tea party are the rebels.

Winning.jpg

I mean, think about it. Who were the rebels? Monarchists and religious types, trying to spread democracy by fighting a bland, faceless "new order" that made everyone dress the same.

The rebel alliance was right wing. The evil empire was liberal communist.


The Tea Party is the Separatists.  A fake uprising controlled by a puppet master to cement himself in power, and who will send Darth Vader to kill them the moment they're no longer useful.
2013-10-03 05:31:08 PM  
3 votes:

Skleenar: sendtodave: The tea party wants the government shut down. The tea party gets what it wants.

Are liberals getting what they want?

Absolutely not.  That's why this isn't time to cave!  This is the time to ADD pressure.

Victory is ours!


i457.photobucket.com
2013-10-03 04:40:01 PM  
3 votes:

Scorpitron is reduced to a thin red paste: she's typing with one hand sort of thing.


I don't think this is the sort of thing she usually masturbates to.
2013-10-03 11:07:13 PM  
2 votes:

fortheloveof: am i the only person that thinks cruz looks a bit like the gay tv guy from v for vendetta


I always think of this

www.texasmonthly.com

i.telegraph.co.uk
2013-10-03 06:34:01 PM  
2 votes:

I_C_Weener: usernameguy: Checkmate.

[i586.photobucket.com image 250x265]


Is it trying to escape? I half expected "nope-nope-nope-squid" to hop out of it when it stopped.
2013-10-03 06:23:24 PM  
2 votes:

CptnSpldng: I do see more than a passing resemblance.


Ted Cruz looks like Liberace and Joe McCarthy had a kid.
2013-10-03 05:10:19 PM  
2 votes:
As a Texan he's pretty revolting. If I spent the rest of my life working to shame public figures like him into a life of quiet irrelevance I'd consider my time well-spent, and my life a resounding success.
2013-10-03 03:44:09 PM  
2 votes:
Separated at birth?
i41.tinypic.com
voxxi.wpengine.netdna-cdn.com
2013-10-03 03:30:51 PM  
2 votes:
Ted Cruz's ship has not only sailed, but it's more full of shiat than a Carnival cruise.
2013-10-03 03:04:01 PM  
2 votes:

God's Hubris: SnakeLee: Holy fark this is a Jennifer Rubin article?  Hahaha he is toast.  It's too bad because he was going to be funny in the primaries


I disagree. We are looking at the next Republican Presidential Front Runner.


It shows that Cruz has the guts to stand up to establishment RINOs like the entire rest of the Republican Party.
2013-10-03 02:55:16 PM  
2 votes:
Read an article in CNN that said basically Cruz has backed Boehner into a corner. NOBODY PUTS BOEHNER IN A CORNER!
2013-10-03 02:45:32 PM  
2 votes:
www.paintinghere.org

Took him, what, 8 months?

/Hope that old timey hiney isn't NSFW
IP
2013-10-03 01:59:53 PM  
2 votes:
From yesterday, and it still applies:

Oh, shut up Ted Cruz, you cock.
2013-10-03 01:48:43 PM  
2 votes:
I can hear it now, from the Tea Party

"this is a sign he is kicking the RINO's butts! We will all be better off when all this spending stops for good! We will take the house AND the senate next!  Cruz/Palin 2016 - book it, done!"

pardon me - i have to go bathe in lye now
2013-10-03 01:46:26 PM  
2 votes:
Good. Couldn't have happened to a better man, bless his little heart.
2013-10-03 01:45:26 PM  
2 votes:
Holy fark this is a Jennifer Rubin article?  Hahaha he is toast.  It's too bad because he was going to be funny in the primaries
2013-10-04 01:13:23 AM  
1 votes:

Muta: He's Q

[images.amcnetworks.com image 200x254]

[www.washingtonpost.com image 850x543]


Hell no. The only similarity between Q and Ted Cruz is making Picard facepalm.

tng.trekcore.com
2013-10-03 08:41:18 PM  
1 votes:
I could have told them that this would be their reaction, soon after the shutdown.  I have difficulty feeling any sympathy for them.  Cruz is crazy.  They are stupid.  If you could listen to all of the rightwing hype about how 2012 would "take back Murca," and see Ham-Rove throwing flop-sweat in all directions on election night as the GOP got kicked to the curb, if you could see 41 votes to repeal Obamacare go down in flames, and still not get it, then you are a special kind of willful stupid.  The only possible treatment I can think of to try to help coax you out of the stupid is to do a five-season guest appearance on "Ow, My Balls."

Suck it, GOP senators.

Suck it.
2013-10-03 08:33:03 PM  
1 votes:

CptnSpldng: UNC_Samurai: fortheloveof: am i the only person that thinks cruz looks a bit like the gay tv guy from v for vendetta

Stephen Fry has passed hundreds of turds smarter and with more class than Ted Cruz.

[img.fark.net image 394x296][mimg.ugo.com image 288x288]
I do see more than a passing resemblance.  General Melchett still makes more sense than Senator Cruz does.

/Well bugger me with a fishfork!


i309.photobucket.com

He haz one...
2013-10-03 07:14:33 PM  
1 votes:

Graffito: [i232.photobucket.com image 276x180]


Hey now Walt wasn't that bad.
2013-10-03 05:59:29 PM  
1 votes:

Barry Lyndon's Annuity Cheque: suziequzie: Any one else get their hackles up when they read this paragraph:

FTFA:
He enraged colleagues further by refusing to repudiate his attack dogs at the Senate Conservatives Fund who savaged Republicans. A Senate source tells Right Turn, "Cruz
got the brunt, but Lee too." Perhaps most shocking, no senator, according to three GOP sources, rose in their defense. They have, to be blunt, been repudiated by a newly united GOP caucus. One Senate aide said, "I  don't think Sen. Cruz entered that meeting with a thick skin, but he left learning he needs one going forward, along with a strategy."

The underlined part switched fonts from a serif font to sans serif - font mixing always irks me.

Font mixing is communism.


And a sin. Leviticus must be obeyed!
2013-10-03 05:56:52 PM  
1 votes:

suziequzie: Any one else get their hackles up when they read this paragraph:

FTFA:
He enraged colleagues further by refusing to repudiate his attack dogs at the Senate Conservatives Fund who savaged Republicans. A Senate source tells Right Turn, "Cruz
got the brunt, but Lee too." Perhaps most shocking, no senator, according to three GOP sources, rose in their defense. They have, to be blunt, been repudiated by a newly united GOP caucus. One Senate aide said, "I  don't think Sen. Cruz entered that meeting with a thick skin, but he left learning he needs one going forward, along with a strategy."

The underlined part switched fonts from a serif font to sans serif - font mixing always irks me.


Font mixing is communism.
2013-10-03 05:14:29 PM  
1 votes:

Nadie_AZ: I like the jab at Rubio. He disappeared pretty quickly.


He's very dehydrated.  He's searching for water.
2013-10-03 05:06:16 PM  
1 votes:

sendtodave: Real Americans are fed up with those liberals on the hill. Democrat or republican.


Amen.

It's time to really look at our supporters and separate the wheat from the chaff.  I don't think we can tolerate any dissension in our ranks right now.  We've got to make sure that every vote, every voice is from a real real American.  I don't know, but reading through these threads, it seems that some of our supporters aren't really toeing the line, and show some squishiness right when we need certitude.

I, for one, am not afraid to start calling out the splitters in our midst!
2013-10-03 05:02:23 PM  
1 votes:
"His willpower dissolved like a new vegan asked to judge a barbeque contest."
2013-10-03 04:43:56 PM  
1 votes:

incendi: Scorpitron is reduced to a thin red paste: she's typing with one hand sort of thing.

I don't think this is the sort of thing she usually masturbates to.


Not what I was going for, but surrounded by pudgy, pig-faced Karl Rove drones intent on controlling her opinions is precisely what Jennifer Rubin likely masterbates to.
2013-10-03 04:34:52 PM  
1 votes:

Car_Ramrod: Christ, no one likes Ted Cruz. How the hell did he get elected, let alone become a figurehead?

His inexplicable rise is directly correspondent to the incoherence of his party. The GOP is a meaningless jumble of contradicting interests and their one uniting pathology, total hatred of Obama, hurts them as much as helps them. They are permanently factionalized and perpetually vulnerable to being hijacked by the next demagogue-of-the-month.

2013-10-03 04:34:39 PM  
1 votes:

boue67: I refuse to believe this tool has any chance whatsoever to be the nominee. If the GOP threw this guy at Hillary, she would crush him so bad, all his molecules would be spread by the solar wind into deep space.


He would get 47% of the vote*, just like Romney.

* minus the number of old, white, stupid, male racist failures that died between 2012 and 2016
2013-10-03 04:28:55 PM  
1 votes:
I refuse to believe this tool has any chance whatsoever to be the nominee. If the GOP threw this guy at Hillary, she would crush him so bad, all his molecules would be spread by the solar wind into deep space.
2013-10-03 04:16:44 PM  
1 votes:

Nonrepeating Rotating Binary: Came for Grumpy Cat.

Leaving disappointed.


I do not have grumpy cat, but maybe this will help...   maybe...
i237.photobucket.com
2013-10-03 03:52:28 PM  
1 votes:

CPennypacker: Ted Cruz isn't stupid.

He's evil.

Oh, also he's stupid.


Yeah, if he wasn't stupid he'd be a lot better at being evil.
2013-10-03 03:47:18 PM  
1 votes:

Weaver95: Cruz isn't completely stupid...he has to know that his party will sell him out in an instant to save themselves from a howling mob of pissed off voters.


I don't know about that, he was dumb enough that Rand Paul seems like a brilliant politician by comparison. I
2013-10-03 03:41:03 PM  
1 votes:
Exclusive-104,000 Strong: Tea Party Patriots Have Record Turnout for Cruz on Tele-Townhall

http://www.breitbart.com/Big-Government/2013/10/03/Tea-Party-Patriot s- Have-Record-Attendance-for-Cruz-Tele-Townhall
2013-10-03 03:37:05 PM  
1 votes:
The GOP leadership to Rafael Cruz
3.bp.blogspot.com
2013-10-03 03:30:19 PM  
1 votes:

Car_Ramrod: At least W is, from all accounts, a nice enough dude to just hang out with. Every article I've read about Ted describes him as one of the biggest assholes to ever walk the Earth.


They're just jelly because Ted will only hang out with graduates of Harvard, Yale, or Princeton.
2013-10-03 03:28:39 PM  
1 votes:
I imagine the Cruz sees himself like one of the ultramarines facing down tyranids.
2013-10-03 03:27:46 PM  
1 votes:

Car_Ramrod: Christ, no one likes Ted Cruz. How the hell did he get elected, let alone become a figurehead?


"We have to elect him so we can find out what's in him"?

Eh. More like "He'll stick it to the libs, and he's a smart lawyer like Obama (without that one half a drawback). We can elect a freshman Senator to the presidency, too!"

// I've read about Jack Kennedy, sir - and you are not fit to delicately and respectfully clean up pieces of his close from a Dealey Plaza
// you're no Jack Kennedy, sir - not RFK, not JFKJR, not TFK, not Caroline, or Maria Shriver, or Arnold's love-child
// you're a shiathead starfarker with more ambition than common sense, and your mom should have worn you on her forehead rather than house you (rent-free, you freeloading douchestand) in her uterus
2013-10-03 03:25:12 PM  
1 votes:

Smelly McUgly: Tea Partiers aren't only bad at understanding economics or public perception outside of their tiny little gerrymandered districts: They also have no concept of political gamesmanship, apparently.



When your only experience in government leadership is watching Boss Hogg on Dukes of Hazzard reruns, you wind up with a government being run by Cletus Hoggs.
2013-10-03 03:21:15 PM  
1 votes:

Shostie: If things went as planned, he should have been kicked out in the primary. But the Texas redistricting lawsuit happened. They couldn't agree on interim maps in time for the planned Texas GOP primary, so the primary was pushed back a few months. This gave Cruz, who was lagging in the polls by a large margin, enough time to turn the derp up to 11 and attract the support of tea party groups. When the primary came around, he crushed his opponent (Dewhurst, if I remember right). After that, it was largely one-sided campaign against a Democratic rival who's name no one could remember.


Exactly right. As I've pointed out in countless threads, Texas had a choice: an asshole (Dewhurst) or a f*cking asshole (Cruz).  Of course the voters here made the bootstappy choice.
2013-10-03 03:17:07 PM  
1 votes:
Tea Partiers aren't only bad at understanding economics or public perception outside of their tiny little gerrymandered districts: They also have no concept of political gamesmanship, apparently.

I'm trying to think of if there have ever been more destructive people running around in Congress. It's like we have a bunch of John C. Calhouns running around in the House, ready to destroy the country if they don't get everything they want (and everything that they want is terrible, by the way).
2013-10-03 03:09:44 PM  
1 votes:
Democratic support for the defund effort never appeared as Sens. Ted Cruz (R-Tex.), Mike Lee (R-Utah) and Marco Rubio (R-Fla.) had assured them it would.

Well, no shiat. Controlling the Senate and the Presidency as they do, Democrats sort of hold the upper hand in all this.

You idiots.

I know it's been said, but it can't be said enough.

/You idiots.
2013-10-03 03:09:23 PM  
1 votes:
upload.wikimedia.org

I like your style.
2013-10-03 03:08:08 PM  
1 votes:
i592.photobucket.com
2013-10-03 03:05:18 PM  
1 votes:

johnnieconnie: I read elsewhere this morning that the GOP is now waking up to the fact that Cruz's entire goal is just to do a victory lap in the Rose Garden upon defeating the ACA.

He has no intention to govern*, or actually has any talent for governing.

*he just wants to watch the government burn

/good times
//bwahahahaha


I know, right? Of course he has no intention to govern. He's in the Tea Party. Like, duh, Republicans.
2013-10-03 02:58:49 PM  
1 votes:

SnakeLee: Holy fark this is a Jennifer Rubin article?  Hahaha he is toast.  It's too bad because he was going to be funny in the primaries



I disagree. We are looking at the next Republican Presidential Front Runner.
2013-10-03 02:26:27 PM  
1 votes:

I_C_Weener: usernameguy: Checkmate.

[i586.photobucket.com image 250x265]


That...

Was actually pretty fun to watch.
2013-10-03 01:49:07 PM  
1 votes:

Cyberluddite: Car_Ramrod: Christ, no one likes Ted Cruz. How the hell did he get elected, let alone become a figurehead?

He's from Texas.  The same state that gave us Geedubya Bush, elected Louis Gohmert to Congress, and elected Rick Perry as Governor.


At least W is, from all accounts, a nice enough dude to just hang out with. Every article I've read about Ted describes him as one of the biggest assholes to ever walk the Earth.
2013-10-03 01:46:01 PM  
1 votes:
That was maybe one of the worst-written articles I have ever agreed with. The grammar and sentence structure were awful. Then I scrolled up and obviously the byline was Jennifer Rubin.
2013-10-03 01:42:54 PM  
1 votes:
"It was very evident to everyone in the room that Cruz doesn't have a strategy - he never had a strategy, and could never answer a question about what the end-game was," an unnamed senator told Politico. "I just wish the 35 House members that have bought the snake oil that was sold could witness what was witnessed today at lunch."

At one point in the meeting, Republicans pressed Cruz to tell them what he would have done had the party united behind his call to filibuster a House-passed continuing resolution to keep the defunding hopes alives. Only 19 Republicans backed Cruz's attempt to block the bill.

"He kept trying to change the subject because he never could answer the question," the anonymous senator said. "It's pretty evident it's never been about a strategy - it's been about him. That's unfortunate. I think he's done our country a major disservice. I think he's done Republicans a major disservice."


Christ, no one likes Ted Cruz. How the hell did he get elected, let alone become a figurehead?
 
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