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(Daily Star)   111-year-old woman's secret to long life? 20 cigs a day, a pint of sherry for breakfast, not having kids   (dailystar.co.uk) divider line 66
    More: Spiffy, New Years  
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6358 clicks; posted to Main » on 29 Sep 2013 at 1:19 AM (48 weeks ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2013-09-28 10:30:57 PM
Whenever they interview these 100+ year olds they always gloat that they smoked and drank their whole life.
 
2013-09-28 10:34:17 PM
Winston Churchill breakfast of champions.  Of course I think he did cognac.
 
2013-09-28 10:46:51 PM
Jesus Christ, what are the odds?

I'm thinking like 1 in 7 billion!
 
2013-09-28 11:32:36 PM
Unfortunately, 20 cigs a day and a pint of sherry for breakfast is also the secret to a very short life.  Go figure.
 
2013-09-29 01:26:45 AM
It's the not having kids part.

She looks very good. I wouldn't have thought she was any older than her late 70's.
 
2013-09-29 01:27:19 AM
Nobody likes to acknowledge the reality that longevity is mostly due to random factors you can't control.
 
2013-09-29 01:31:33 AM
Some of us are so amazing we owe it to humanity to pass our genetic data forward. With her longevity she sounds like one of us. Fark you, selfish coont!
 
2013-09-29 01:38:53 AM
I'd party with this lady.

you only get one turn at life. May as well enjoy it!
 
2013-09-29 01:41:05 AM
It's the difference between Keith Richards and Gram Parsons.
 
2013-09-29 01:42:20 AM
 
2013-09-29 01:46:36 AM

Watching_Epoxy_Cure: Nobody likes to acknowledge the reality that longevity is mostly due to random factors you can't control.


Mostly?... I doubt it. (see: cancer, heart disease, liver disease, obesity...)
In ether case, she's definitely an outlier.

/Maybe she embalmed herself with nicotine.
//Maybe it's Maybelline.
 
2013-09-29 01:52:39 AM
I want to be her BFF
 
2013-09-29 01:52:49 AM
In 60 or 70 years, when we can casually regrow organs internally as a preventative measure rather than transplantation at the point of failure, the Queen is going to have a bloody load of 100th birthday letters to write every day.


/Queen Elizabeth IV
 
2013-09-29 02:03:33 AM

jst3p: Some of us are so amazing we owe it to humanity to pass our genetic data forward. With her longevity she sounds like one of us. Fark you, selfish coont!


Yep.  Hers has been a pointless existence.

She may as well have never been born to tell us that the Titanics demise was a sad event.
 
2013-09-29 02:07:04 AM

Watching_Epoxy_Cure: Nobody likes to acknowledge the reality that longevity is mostly due to random factors you can't control.


Aww someone doesn't understand statistics. Cute.
 
2013-09-29 02:10:54 AM

2wolves: Winston Churchill breakfast of champions.  Of course I think he did cognac.


Well he lived into his 90s.
 
2013-09-29 02:11:00 AM
I better get on that sherry then.
 
2013-09-29 02:22:33 AM
With no kids, there's a shot that her tits are still perky.

A long shot.
 
2013-09-29 02:42:00 AM

TomD9938: jst3p: Some of us are so amazing we owe it to humanity to pass our genetic data forward. With her longevity she sounds like one of us. Fark you, selfish coont!

Yep.  Hers has been a pointless existence.

She may as well have never been born to tell us that the Titanics demise was a sad event.


Not having kids is possibly a contributor to her longevity. When they studied those who live to over one hundred there was an over-representation of childless people. Women who have never married make up the largest proportion of those living over one hundred. It is possible that had this woman had children she's not be in this article in the first place.

As an aside, eunuchs live between 14 to 19 years longer than uncastrated men. So if you are male and are really serious about living for a long time, you know what to do.
 
2013-09-29 02:42:17 AM
111-year-old woman's secret to long life? 20 cigs a day, a pint of sherry for breakfast, not having kids genetics.
 
2013-09-29 02:44:07 AM

Marcus Aurelius: With no kids, there's a shot that her tits are still perky.

A long shot.


Just pull off her socks and check for yourself.
 
2013-09-29 02:58:31 AM
I quit smoking 9 months ago, I have no children, and if she was cute I would have some Sherry everyday. I want to live until I'm not able to enjoy the things that I like in this world and not a minute after.
 
2013-09-29 03:00:41 AM

Nidiot: TomD9938: jst3p: Some of us are so amazing we owe it to humanity to pass our genetic data forward. With her longevity she sounds like one of us. Fark you, selfish coont!

Yep.  Hers has been a pointless existence.

She may as well have never been born to tell us that the Titanics demise was a sad event.

Not having kids is possibly a contributor to her longevity. When they studied those who live to over one hundred there was an over-representation of childless people. Women who have never married make up the largest proportion of those living over one hundred. It is possible that had this woman had children she's not be in this article in the first place.

As an aside, eunuchs live between 14 to 19 years longer than uncastrated men. So if you are male and are really serious about living for a long time, you know what to do.


It was only when I saw in the fine print that she was a widow, that I discarded the idea that her longevity might have been due to her being a virgin

Because that would be a great source of hope around here
 
2013-09-29 03:17:46 AM
Living dirty gives you the best bang for your buck.  20 Helens agree!
 
2013-09-29 03:47:14 AM

Marcus Aurelius: With no kids, there's a shot that her tits are still perky.

A long shot.


At least her cooch might still be tight.

/long shot
/but not as long
 
2013-09-29 04:00:02 AM

Mugato: Whenever they interview these 100+ year olds they always gloat that they smoked and drank their whole life.


Its almost like making yourself happy is healthy.
 
2013-09-29 04:14:16 AM
I suspect one secret to her longevity is not giving a toss what a bunch of wankers think about her on the internet.
 
2013-09-29 04:15:41 AM

Mugato: Whenever they interview these 100+ year olds they always gloat that they smoked and drank their whole life.


If I spent a century listening to sanctimonious health nuts tell me everything I do is going to lead to an early grave, you can best believe I'd revel in every cigarette, wallow in every shot of bourbon, boast about every plate of barbeque I'd ever stuffed down my gullet, and defiantly flip off every gym/health spa I passed by.

Ultimately, we all share the same fate--might as well enjoy our time here...

Plus...not having kids is a wonderful decision that should be honored instead of being eyed suspiciously.  The world's got limited resources.  The last thing it needs is more shrieking crotchfruit draining them.,,
 
2013-09-29 04:31:00 AM
20 cigs a day, a pint of sherry for breakfast, not having kids

not having kids

This here:
not having kids
 
2013-09-29 04:31:03 AM

I sound fat: Mugato: Whenever they interview these 100+ year olds they always gloat that they smoked and drank their whole life.

Its almost like making yourself happy is healthy.


Being happy probably is very good for ones health. Even if that were not so, if I had to choose between being healthy but unhappy, or happy but unhealthy, happiness would win every time.
 
2013-09-29 04:44:33 AM
We're all looking at an Ultrafarker here.
 
2013-09-29 05:01:30 AM

Uncle Tractor: 20 cigs a day, a pint of sherry for breakfast, not having kids

not having kids

This here:
not having kids


You know who else didnt have any kids.

Apparently, Germany was barren, the poor dear.
 
2013-09-29 05:26:45 AM

Mugato: Whenever they interview these 100+ year olds they always gloat that they smoked and drank their whole life.


My great grandma would probably tell you that she never smokes or drinks, but she was married to a smoker for over 50 years, so it wouldn't give you an accurate picture of her chemical exposure anyway.

I take retirement planning a little more seriously than most... just in case it's genetics and not sheer luck.
 
2013-09-29 05:54:06 AM
Not having kids is definitely the major factor here. It's no coincidence the the average life expectancy of nuns is much greater that the rest of the female population, even accounting for diet etc...
 
2013-09-29 06:39:57 AM

mungo: Not having kids is definitely the major factor here. It's no coincidence the the average life expectancy of nuns is much greater that the rest of the female population, even accounting for diet etc...


Tell me about it. I just spent most of the night awake with my toddler. Why was he awake? No farkin' clue, other than because he wasn't asleep. I'm sure sleep deprivation plus stress plus germs the kids bring home all shorten life expectancies of parents.
 
2013-09-29 07:16:35 AM

Uncle Tractor: 20 cigs a day, a pint of sherry for breakfast, not having kids

not having kids

This here:
not having kids


Reminds me of Zsa Zsa Gabor, 96 and still around. Being richer than God probably helps to though.
 
2013-09-29 07:38:42 AM
I had an aunt that drank a pint of sherry every day, and she did fine. That was in the days when you could bring your own container to the liquor store, and they would fill it from a barrel (in England).
 
2013-09-29 07:51:34 AM
I was honestly surprised masturbation was not mentioned.
 
2013-09-29 08:00:13 AM
There's no way this can be true, if the Fark know-it-alls have taught me anything it's that if a person inhales so much as a puff of second hand smoke they'll die of lung cancer in 5 years. No way someone could actually smoke and live to 111.
 
2013-09-29 08:06:50 AM

Nidiot: TomD9938: jst3p: Some of us are so amazing we owe it to humanity to pass our genetic data forward. With her longevity she sounds like one of us. Fark you, selfish coont!

Yep.  Hers has been a pointless existence.

She may as well have never been born to tell us that the Titanics demise was a sad event.

Not having kids is possibly a contributor to her longevity. When they studied those who live to over one hundred there was an over-representation of childless people. Women who have never married make up the largest proportion of those living over one hundred. It is possible that had this woman had children she's not be in this article in the first place.

As an aside, eunuchs live between 14 to 19 years longer than uncastrated men. So if you are male and are really serious about living for a long time, you know what to do.


As someone currently in labor with her first child, I'm getting a kick...

/literally, little farker's kicking me in between contractions...
 
2013-09-29 08:32:00 AM
So the secret to a long life is addictions and the end of the human race? Sounds about right.
 
2013-09-29 08:37:53 AM
article forgot to mention she still lives with her parents....
 
2013-09-29 08:41:58 AM

Watching_Epoxy_Cure: Nobody likes to acknowledge the reality that longevity is mostly due to random factors you can't control.


It's called genetics, and this is so true.
 
2013-09-29 08:45:50 AM
Odd how some people just don't seem to be effected by a poor diet and stuff like smoking. Yet I know some people that have exercised and eaten right their whole life and still have heart problems fairly early on.

Me and my dad recently ran into a guy when we were out nature watching and got to talking to him. We didn't think he was much older than my dad (dad is mid 60s, this guy looked about 70), until he started talking about working at his dad's gas station during WWII when he was in his early teens, and how the soldiers always tipped well. My dad said "Wait a second...how old are you?" and I can't remember exact age but he was around his mid 80s.

The guy was still in a solid state of mind, had driven himself there, was chain smoking (and didn't even cough once). Said he had drank heavily most of his life, though he had quit awhile back, never had any heart or lung problems. Even his doctor who had tried to get him to quit smoking for years pretty much said don't bother at this point - why change anything you're in your 80s and in good health. He was a country boy and ate rich fatty foods most of his life too, albeit not a lot of processed crap.

Big thing I notice about guys like him though, they tend to be people that have been consistently physically active most of their life, not just working out an hour or so a day to maintain a good figure.
Same thing with my husband's grandmother. She is in her mid 90s and still drives and takes no prescription meds, is sound mind and gets around just fine. But she was a farm girl and has been active her whole life. She was mowing and weed eating her 3 acre yard up into her 70s when it finally got to be kind of tedious, and still walks a few miles every single day.
 
2013-09-29 09:11:46 AM

jst3p: Some of us are so amazing we owe it to humanity to pass our genetic data forward. With her longevity she sounds like one of us. Fark you, selfish coont!


I've heard of survival of the species, but I want no part of it.
 
2013-09-29 09:13:06 AM

mungo: Not having kids is definitely the major factor here. It's no coincidence the the average life expectancy of nuns is much greater that the rest of the female population, even accounting for diet etc...


Yep. And thanks to the Affordable Care Act, I can now get myself fixed for free (except for the anesthesia).

Thanks, Obama!
 
2013-09-29 10:02:32 AM

Uncle Tractor: 20 cigs a day, a pint of sherry for breakfast, not having kids

not having kids

This here:
not having kids


So Andrea Dworkin and Mr. Butts are in agreement on this one?
 
2013-09-29 10:09:57 AM
Does anyone really want to live that long?
 
2013-09-29 10:11:39 AM
Also helped that she lived in a nice riverside university town in the north of England
 
2013-09-29 10:20:46 AM

bborchar: Does anyone really want to live that long?


If I'm still in decent health and mind I would.

If I'm falling apart and have dementia then no, put a farking bullet in me.
 
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