Do you have adblock enabled?
If you can read this, either the style sheet didn't load or you have an older browser that doesn't support style sheets. Try clearing your browser cache and refreshing the page.

(Reason Magazine)   First The War on Drugs came for the heroin, and I didn't speak out because I wasn't a mainliner. Then they came for the Mt. Dew, and "Oh, it's on now, motherfarker"   (reason.com) divider line 47
    More: Stupid, dew, Mountain Dew, tooth decay, cola, heroin  
•       •       •

7665 clicks; posted to Main » on 28 Sep 2013 at 4:59 PM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



47 Comments   (+0 »)
   
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest
 
2013-09-28 04:04:01 PM  
We kept telling you fatties that your day would come, now you get to lay in your (over sized & reinforced) bed.

-Smokers
 
vpb [TotalFark]
2013-09-28 04:35:18 PM  
Maybe it's the combination of sugary drinks and being ignorant hillbillies who don't own a tooth brush?
 
2013-09-28 05:05:32 PM  
I wonder if this has anything to do with the combination of the facts that dental care is the first medical care to be ignored when money's tight and that Appalachia is poor as shiat?
 
2013-09-28 05:07:13 PM  
The cracked article mentioned in tfa was both entertaining and effective at ripping that study apart.
 
2013-09-28 05:08:00 PM  

BumpInTheNight: We kept telling you fatties that your day would come, now you get to lay in your (over sized & reinforced) bed.

-Smokers


I love you a little bit.
 
2013-09-28 05:08:46 PM  
The toothbrush was invented in Kentucky. Otherwise it would be called the teeth brush.
 
2013-09-28 05:12:40 PM  
I think the word they're looking for is "meth".
 
2013-09-28 05:17:16 PM  
This article brought to you by the American Beverage Association.
 
2013-09-28 05:19:05 PM  
I have to go facepalm now.
 
2013-09-28 05:19:48 PM  
It's not what they drink or how much they drink.
It's the fact that they sip it constantly throughout the day, never giving their teeth time to rinse off.
 
2013-09-28 05:20:18 PM  
Subby sounds fat toothless.
 
2013-09-28 05:21:35 PM  

darwinpolice: I wonder if this has anything to do with the combination of the facts that dental care is the first medical care to be ignored when money's tight and that Appalachia is poor as shiat?


Actually, most of them are so poor they have free dental, and the extreme costs are why this issue came to light in the first time.
 
2013-09-28 05:22:49 PM  
Don't tell my dentist, but I have been guzzling Coca Cola and its equivalent for decades now at a rate of two litres (quarts) a day. That's about 30 sugar cubes per litre, or 60 cubic centimeters of sugar per day. I think I am at risk of diabetes. That would be a bummer. They still haven't found a cheap pill for that.

My "stable mouth" (that's stable as in unchanging, not as in a place where horses are kept) exists despite this massive over-consumption of the nutritionist's pet monster, soda pop, or possibly because of it. It is despite not brushing my teeth nearly as often as I should, and not being able to floss much because my teeth are too tight.

Most of the damage to my teeth is the result of accidents, weak wisdom teeth and wear and tear rather than diet.

My dentist recently revealed that he thought I was ten or more years younger than he had been assuming and admited that this meant my teeth were in better shape by that much time than he had thought.

Now I know that anecdote is the weakest form of evidence and that you are bound to get some smokers and alcoholics who live to ripe old ages. It might be that they would have lived to even riper old ages if they had been more abstemious--after all, genetics and a carefree attitude seems to contribute most to the lifespan and health of the super-centenarians. My grandparents lived into their 80s with much worse diets and health care than I have had.
 My Father got sensitive teeth by brushing them too hard. He would squash a toothbrush's bristles in less than the manufacturer's suggested lifespan. My teeth have already out-lasted his by virtue of not brushing the enamel off of them and thanks to acrylic coatings by my dentist.


But I suspect that bad teeth has more to do with bad dentistry and no dentistry than bad habits. Remember, a lot of the People of WalMart get their dentistry from a van or station wagon in the parking lot. Also, remember that hillbillies, unlike most Americans in the Eastern and Western coastal cities have British teeth. They are naturally nasty because the British did not breed for good looks the way the Mediterranean peoples did. They bred for other qualities, vices, and virtues. And their diet has traditionally been horrible, unlike the French or Greek diets, which are quite wholesome and wise.
 
2013-09-28 05:24:07 PM  

megarian: BumpInTheNight: We kept telling you fatties that your day would come, now you get to lay in your (over sized & reinforced) bed.

-Smokers

I love you a little bit.


And she still won't tlak to me. :p

In other news: I call bullshiat. I us4ed to drink Mountain Dew by the case when I was in college, and my teeth are as close to perfect as they can get after years of orthodontics...
 
2013-09-28 05:24:38 PM  

Dwindle: It's not what they drink or how much they drink.
It's the fact that they sip it constantly throughout the day, never giving their teeth time to rinse off.


Back when I worked at a job with a free soda fountain, I was drinking 4 liters of Dew a day. My gums were so swollen from the constant soaking in the stuff that my dentist said he couldn't clean my teeth without risking damage to them. I eventually kicked the habit, and now have a permanent waterline on my teeth where the swelling prevented further staining and erosion.
 
2013-09-28 05:28:01 PM  

Dwindle: Actually, most of them are so poor they have free dental


Not in the USA they don't.
 
2013-09-28 05:28:18 PM  
 
2013-09-28 05:34:30 PM  
I have been in surgery with a dental surgeon and most of the time it meth heads that would come in for full extractions for preprosthetic surgery. Once or twice he would point one out and say "Mountain Dew Mouth". So I think that it's a real thing.

Or he could have been farking with me.
 
2013-09-28 05:40:56 PM  

Dwindle: darwinpolice: I wonder if this has anything to do with the combination of the facts that dental care is the first medical care to be ignored when money's tight and that Appalachia is poor as shiat?

Actually, most of them are so poor they have free dental, and the extreme costs are why this issue came to light in the first time.


Please tell me where I can go to get free dental care. Seriously, I need it.
 
2013-09-28 05:42:56 PM  
Isn't that Mello Yello or Sun Drop territory?

/Cheerwine
 
2013-09-28 05:44:28 PM  

JuniorII: I have been in surgery with a dental surgeon and most of the time it meth heads that would come in for full extractions for preprosthetic surgery. Once or twice he would point one out and say "Mountain Dew Mouth". So I think that it's a real thing.

Or he could have been farking with me.


Hmm... I do not drink dew or do math and my teeth are all falling apart at 35. Not much decay just weak. Must be the little bit of British in me...
 
2013-09-28 05:45:32 PM  
I don't do meth either...
 
2013-09-28 05:46:28 PM  
Really?  So the toothless hillbilly stereotype is something that has came about since Mountain Dew?  Give me a farking break.
 
2013-09-28 05:52:01 PM  

Skyrmion: I think the word they're looking for is "meth".


Smoked from an old Mt. Dew can...
 
2013-09-28 05:52:25 PM  
memestorage.com
 
2013-09-28 05:54:46 PM  
img.fark.net
 
2013-09-28 06:01:53 PM  

BatardAmericain: [img.fark.net image 404x402]


Hey look he's reaching for the diet soda.
 
2013-09-28 06:02:47 PM  

BatardAmericain: [img.fark.net image 404x402]


He needs Tip-Assist.
 
2013-09-28 06:06:09 PM  

Slappajo: Really?  So the toothless hillbilly stereotype is something that has came about since Mountain Dew?  Give me a farking break.



Well, they certainly helped to spread that stereotype.

www.youtube.com/watch?v=dyu4Tpoq8hc

i28.photobucket.com
i28.photobucket.com
i28.photobucket.com
 
2013-09-28 06:10:43 PM  
Debunked by Cracked. That's the state of our media.
 
2013-09-28 06:19:20 PM  
Funny story, one of the ingredients listed on Mountain Dew is orange juice. So, there's actually vitamin C in there, not that I'm saying go out and drink it instead of actual juice... but you'd think it would actually *help* a little bit since C helps with calcium absorption...
 
2013-09-28 06:22:47 PM  

cc_rider: Subby sounds fat toothless.


Hmmmm...ok

i149.photobucket.com
 
2013-09-28 06:22:50 PM  
Prof. Harris concluded that if Pepsi won't "do more," then new regulations (including soda taxes) should follow.

Mind your own business Biatch. Jebuz Cripes.
 
2013-09-28 06:26:09 PM  
Or more appropriately, here's a better picture of the effects of massive Mountain Dew consumption.

  i1.ytimg.com
 
2013-09-28 06:26:55 PM  

Ruthven13: JuniorII: I have been in surgery with a dental surgeon and most of the time it meth heads that would come in for full extractions for preprosthetic surgery. Once or twice he would point one out and say "Mountain Dew Mouth". So I think that it's a real thing.

Or he could have been farking with me.

Hmm... I do not drink dew or do math and my teeth are all falling apart at 35. Not much decay just weak. Must be the little bit of British in me...


My mom's teeth are like that too. Mine are pretty normal, despite my utter lack of enamel.

/Seriously, cleanings are  NOT FUN and I  DO NOT enjoy dentist visits
//ever
 
2013-09-28 06:27:58 PM  

BatardAmericain: [img.fark.net image 404x402]


So taking that picture was more important than helping the poor bastard back in his chair.
Booo-yaaaaa, go America go. God I'm proud.
 
2013-09-28 06:29:18 PM  

ladyfortuna: Funny story, one of the ingredients listed on Mountain Dew is orange juice. So, there's actually vitamin C in there, not that I'm saying go out and drink it instead of actual juice... but you'd think it would actually *help* a little bit since C helps with calcium absorption...


Not enough to matter. It's only a few drops of actual OJ per bottle--not enough to matter. But even so, I hardly ever drink regular orange juice myself  anyway because of the high calories and sugar content. I usually drink Trop 50 if I want that sort of thing.

/35 still have all my teeth, no decay, no cavities, good gums,
//dad was from Maine, had dentures at my age.
 
2013-09-28 06:31:19 PM  

Whatchoo Talkinbout: BatardAmericain: [img.fark.net image 404x402]

So taking that picture was more important than helping the poor bastard back in his chair.
Booo-yaaaaa, go America go. God I'm proud.


It probably took six or seven employees to get this lardass upright.
 
2013-09-28 06:32:49 PM  

PsiChick: Ruthven13: JuniorII: I have been in surgery with a dental surgeon and most of the time it meth heads that would come in for full extractions for preprosthetic surgery. Once or twice he would point one out and say "Mountain Dew Mouth". So I think that it's a real thing.

Or he could have been farking with me.

Hmm... I do not drink dew or do math and my teeth are all falling apart at 35. Not much decay just weak. Must be the little bit of British in me...

My mom's teeth are like that too. Mine are pretty normal, despite my utter lack of enamel.

/Seriously, cleanings are  NOT FUN and I  DO NOT enjoy dentist visits
//ever


I'm probably more "British" by blood than most Americans, and still have perfect teeth.
 
2013-09-28 06:33:52 PM  

brantgoose: Don't tell my dentist, but I have been guzzling Coca Cola and its equivalent for decades now at a rate of two litres (quarts) a day. That's about 30 sugar cubes per litre, or 60 cubic centimeters of sugar per day. I think I am at risk of diabetes. That would be a bummer. They still haven't found a cheap pill for that.

My "stable mouth" (that's stable as in unchanging, not as in a place where horses are kept) exists despite this massive over-consumption of the nutritionist's pet monster, soda pop, or possibly because of it. It is despite not brushing my teeth nearly as often as I should, and not being able to floss much because my teeth are too tight.

Most of the damage to my teeth is the result of accidents, weak wisdom teeth and wear and tear rather than diet.

My dentist recently revealed that he thought I was ten or more years younger than he had been assuming and admited that this meant my teeth were in better shape by that much time than he had thought.

Now I know that anecdote is the weakest form of evidence and that you are bound to get some smokers and alcoholics who live to ripe old ages. It might be that they would have lived to even riper old ages if they had been more abstemious--after all, genetics and a carefree attitude seems to contribute most to the lifespan and health of the super-centenarians. My grandparents lived into their 80s with much worse diets and health care than I have had.
 My Father got sensitive teeth by brushing them too hard. He would squash a toothbrush's bristles in less than the manufacturer's suggested lifespan. My teeth have already out-lasted his by virtue of not brushing the enamel off of them and thanks to acrylic coatings by my dentist.


But I suspect that bad teeth has more to do with bad dentistry and no dentistry than bad habits. Remember, a lot of the People of WalMart get their dentistry from a van or station wagon in the parking lot. Also, remember that hillbillies, unlike most Americans in the Eastern and Western ...


It's just genetics.  Some people are far more susceptible to enamel wear than others.  I have a twin brother - he got my father's teeth, I got my mother's.  By the time we were 20, having eaten roughly the same diet and drinking the same drinks over the years, he had 13 cavities and I'd never had one.  I'm 45 and I've had one cavity my entire life.  He's up to 19.

I don't think it's actually the teeth, it's probably something to do with saliva.
 
2013-09-28 06:37:04 PM  
 
2013-09-28 07:02:27 PM  

BatardAmericain: [img.fark.net image 404x402]


Where's Wall-E when you need him?
 
2013-09-28 08:08:18 PM  
Are they sure they got the right mountain dew?  are they sure its not the kind made in a still?
 
2013-09-29 06:02:07 AM  
Sometimes I wonder if were suffering from information overload with BS articles like this one.
 
2013-09-29 09:55:41 AM  

BatardAmericain: ladyfortuna: Funny story, one of the ingredients listed on Mountain Dew is orange juice. So, there's actually vitamin C in there, not that I'm saying go out and drink it instead of actual juice... but you'd think it would actually *help* a little bit since C helps with calcium absorption...

Not enough to matter. It's only a few drops of actual OJ per bottle--not enough to matter. But even so, I hardly ever drink regular orange juice myself  anyway because of the high calories and sugar content. I usually drink Trop 50 if I want that sort of thing.

/35 still have all my teeth, no decay, no cavities, good gums,
//dad was from Maine, had dentures at my age.


I haven't bought it in years so I can't look at a label, but I seem to recall it was near the beginning of the list. Perhaps that has changed. Personally I only drink that Simply Orange juice, because all the other kinds just taste odd to me with their additives. /hipster /foodie /douche /whatever
 
2013-09-29 10:48:41 AM  
I drink a 2 of Dew a day.  I rinse my mouth often with plain ol' water.  I brush my teeth twice a day.  My teeth are fine.  For the guy earlier who claimed that Dew left him with a permanent waterline, it's because you didn't brush your teeth.  That simple.

I teach at a middle school and I warn the kids of the dangers of drinking Dew - permanent awesomeness.  One of the kids asked me why I carry a 2-liter of Dew around school everyday, and I answered, "Because they don't sell 3's."

Do the DEW.
 
2013-09-29 08:47:22 PM  
Maybe instead of arguing over which foods to villify we should just educate people to consume them in reasonable quantities and accept that the very stupid may experience negative health consequences as a result of their poor decisions.


And if we're going to go for crazy ideas like that, maybe make health care and dental care affordable and available to everyone


...or we can just tell people that soda is made by the devil and fast food is part of an alien plot to exterminate all human life
 
Displayed 47 of 47 comments

View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest


This thread is closed to new comments.

Continue Farking
Submit a Link »
Advertisement
On Twitter






In Other Media


  1. Links are submitted by members of the Fark community.

  2. When community members submit a link, they also write a custom headline for the story.

  3. Other Farkers comment on the links. This is the number of comments. Click here to read them.

  4. Click here to submit a link.

Report