Do you have adblock enabled?
If you can read this, either the style sheet didn't load or you have an older browser that doesn't support style sheets. Try clearing your browser cache and refreshing the page.

(The Raw Story)   Christian groups sue to keep Kansas schools from teaching science as if it's true   (rawstory.com) divider line 36
    More: Fail, Kansas, Kansas schools, faith groups, orthodoxy, creationisms, standards, Pacific Justice Institute  
•       •       •

3629 clicks; posted to Politics » on 27 Sep 2013 at 12:55 PM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



Voting Results (Funniest)
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest

2013-09-27 12:22:55 PM  
5 votes:
These people are embarrassingly stupid and weirdly proud of it.
2013-09-27 01:38:45 PM  
4 votes:
i.imgur.com
2013-09-27 01:08:04 PM  
3 votes:

vudukungfu: Schools are like polling places. And religion is like a penis. It's OK to have one. It's OK to be proud of it.It is NOT OK to wave it around in public.



...or to ram it down childrens' throats.
2013-09-27 12:36:30 PM  
3 votes:
What's science ever done for us?

*clicks add comment*
2013-09-27 12:33:56 PM  
3 votes:
Here, I'll list all of the medical achievements made through an analysis of the bible:
2013-09-27 01:13:00 PM  
2 votes:

Angry Drunk Bureaucrat: Everyone knows that Atun masturbated onto the ground creating the other gods.

Why won't the Kansas school board teach this?

DAMMIT WEENER!


Ned Flanders: We want you to teach alternative theories to Darwinian evolution.

Principal Skinner: You mean, Lamarckian evolution?
2013-09-27 12:58:15 PM  
2 votes:
proudtobeafilthyliberalscum.com
2013-09-27 12:35:21 PM  
2 votes:
That's one of the greatest accompanying photos I've ever seen with an article like this.
2013-09-27 12:33:30 PM  
2 votes:
Next up: renaming Liberal
2013-09-27 12:32:41 PM  
2 votes:
The world needs ditch diggers too.
2013-09-27 12:30:51 PM  
2 votes:
Everyone knows that Atun masturbated onto the ground creating the other gods.

Why won't the Kansas school board teach this?

DAMMIT WEENER!
2013-09-27 12:26:41 PM  
2 votes:

Weaver95: These people are embarrassingly stupid and weirdly proud of it.


And also really non-self-aware: FTFA:

"The statement went on to say that "teaching the materialistic/atheistic ideas to primary school children whose minds are susceptible to blindly accepting them as true" is unconstitutional and dangerous, and therefore the new science standards must be stopped. "

And yet apparently teaching primary school children about religion is not dangerous at all.
2013-09-27 04:41:01 PM  
1 votes:

rinosaurus: I also don't think Paine would have gone along with Christian creationism being taught in the first place.


No, but Paine would have supported the scientific theory of Intelligent Design.  And he certainly would not approve of efforts to prohibit students from learning about Intelligent Design in schools.  He and Jefferson would insist that students should at least have the opportunity to learn of the controversy and of the differing views, so that they should be permitted to think and decide for themselves.  Most reasonable people think so too.
2013-09-27 03:17:11 PM  
1 votes:

FloydA: haolegirl:

I thought they kinda sorta believed in evolution, that a little bit happened cause Noah couldn't fit two of EVERYTHING on the ark, and just brought a sampling and what we have now evolved from that? Or did I dream it?


Not all of them, but some creationists make that claim.  What's amazing about it is that, in order for the claim to make even a tiny bit of sense, they have to propose that evolution can happen a whole hell of a lot faster than even the most extreme PunkEek fan would propose, AND that nobody noticed at the time that a pair of generic deer gave birth to white tails, mule deer, elk, moose, red deer, and caribou all in one litter,  AND that this process of hyper-evolution stopped as soon as we started looking.
They make that argument in an effort to preserve the ark story.

Other creationists just sort of bypass the ark story and assume that God crammed the animals into that small space by magic, or the ark was bigger than it is described, as though it was a Tardis or something.


Meat plants. That's my favorite "no, the ark is totally true!" argument. In short, the animals on the Ark didn't prey on each other because, prior to the flood, they were all herbivores. Post-flood scarcity led to the dietary change of what we now call carnivores. Because pre-flood, there were plants made of meat, and that's what lions and bears ate, and that's why they have predatory teeth and claws where other animals are designed to eat plants.

I'd have laughed myself to death over that except it was the honest assertion of my friend's mom. (My friend, thankfully, is smart enough to think that's bugfark insane. But he's one of 7 kids in a rural PA homeschooled family, and everything you can possibly imagine about them is true) Instead I brought up the genetic bottleneck in cheetahs, which would have happened to every animal in the flood, and her response was that God fixed them all afterward. Letting that one slide, I asked her why the cheetahs didn't get fixed along with all the others then.

Bless her heart, she actually used wit. "Because cheetahs never prosper."

/and none of that is a pre-written joke from somewhere
//that legit happened
///slashies evolved in threes
2013-09-27 02:42:25 PM  
1 votes:
controversy.wearscience.comcontroversy.wearscience.comcontroversy.wearscience.comcontroversy.wearscience.comcontroversy.wearscience.comcontroversy.wearscience.comcontroversy.wearscience.comcontroversy.wearscience.comcontroversy.wearscience.comcontroversy.wearscience.comcontroversy.wearscience.comcontroversy.wearscience.comcontroversy.wearscience.comcontroversy.wearscience.comcontroversy.wearscience.comcontroversy.wearscience.comcontroversy.wearscience.comcontroversy.wearscience.comcontroversy.wearscience.comcontroversy.wearscience.comcontroversy.wearscience.comcontroversy.wearscience.comcontroversy.wearscience.comcontroversy.wearscience.comcontroversy.wearscience.comcontroversy.wearscience.comcontroversy.wearscience.comcontroversy.wearscience.comcontroversy.wearscience.comcontroversy.wearscience.comcontroversy.wearscience.comcontroversy.wearscience.comcontroversy.wearscience.comcontroversy.wearscience.comcontroversy.wearscience.comcontroversy.wearscience.comcontroversy.wearscience.comcontroversy.wearscience.comcontroversy.wearscience.comcontroversy.wearscience.com
2013-09-27 02:24:20 PM  
1 votes:

harleyquinnical: cameroncrazy1984: Weaver95: These people are embarrassingly stupid and weirdly proud of it.

And also really non-self-aware: FTFA:

"The statement went on to say that "teaching the materialistic/atheistic ideas to primary school children whose minds are susceptible to blindly accepting them as true" is unconstitutional and dangerous, and therefore the new science standards must be stopped. "

And yet apparently teaching primary school children about religion is not dangerous at all.

Is there any chance of me getting this huge serving of double standards with a side of pasta?


Of course, it's also paired with the White Whine.
2013-09-27 02:21:33 PM  
1 votes:

monoski: dr_blasto: EWreckedSean: Off the subject, but saying science is true is a bit of a misnomer too. Scientific theories, which are the strongest of scientific facts, are often shown to be not 100% accurate (e.g. special relativity to general relativity).

They're testable and repeatable. Sometimes the test gets better and what was once promoted to theory gets washed away based on new evidence. Sometimes it is just new discovery that better explains a process.

That's the thing, though. Testable and repeatable. Wilingness to change accepted theories based on new evidence; these are how we get science. Religion just 'is' because they believe it. Of the two choices here, one is more "true" than the other.

You mean to tell me that whole walking on water thing is not repeatable?


Of course it is repeatable. I get to do it every winter.
2013-09-27 02:16:00 PM  
1 votes:

SkinnyHead: "It has been the error of the schools to teach astronomy, and all the other sciences and subjects of natural philosophy, as accomplishments only; whereas they should be taught theologically, or with reference to the Being who is the author of them: for all the principles of science are of divine origin. Man cannot make, or invent, or contrive principles. He can only discover them; and he ought to look through the discovery to the Author."  ~ Thomas Paine.


Auditioning for the role of Bevets, are we?
2013-09-27 02:14:35 PM  
1 votes:
And, in the evangelical sanctioned history class...

i.imgbox.com
2013-09-27 02:04:30 PM  
1 votes:
"The suit alleges that the new (science) standards will 'promote religious beliefs that are inconsistent with the theistic religious beliefs of plaintiff'"

I think I see your problem..
2013-09-27 02:02:14 PM  
1 votes:
How strong is your faith if science creates a hostile environment? More importantly, how great is your God if you are incapable of using the brain he gave you?
2013-09-27 01:42:11 PM  
1 votes:
"How can I help from believing what is in my own heart? Two plus two are five."
"Sometimes, Winston, sometimes they are four. You must try harder. It is not easy to become sane."
2013-09-27 01:22:32 PM  
1 votes:
peakwatch.typepad.com

Pants full of macaroni!!: they-tried-to-teach-my-baby-science.jpg

/for some reason i am no longer able to post pictures - when i click the icon, it greys the screen but does not pop up the box


here you go...
2013-09-27 01:16:31 PM  
1 votes:

pacified: the real question: why did Jesus put water on Mars?


that's was SATAN

/TRICKSTER!
2013-09-27 01:15:28 PM  
1 votes:

Quasar: cameroncrazy1984: Weaver95: These people are embarrassingly stupid and weirdly proud of it.

And also really non-self-aware: FTFA:

"The statement went on to say that "teaching the materialistic/atheistic ideas to primary school children whose minds are susceptible to blindly accepting them as true" is unconstitutional and dangerous, and therefore the new science standards must be stopped. "

And yet apparently teaching primary school children about religion is not dangerous at all.

My brain wanted to climb back into the primordial soup when I read that.


Don't be silly. The primordial soup from which we emerged has been gone for 6,000 years.
2013-09-27 01:14:27 PM  
1 votes:

vudukungfu: qorkfiend: but is there an accepted standard for the courts?

Put your left hand on the bible and raise your right hand.
You you swear to tell the truth the whole truth and nothing but the truth so help you god?

Yes

GTFO.

Suppose the Bible they hand you to swear on is upside-down. Or backward. Or both! And you swear to tell the truth on an upside-down backward Bible. Would that count? Suppose the Bible they hand you is an old Bible and half the pages are missing. Suppose all they have is a Chinese Bible-in an American court. Or a braille Bible, and you're not blind! Suppose they hand you an upside-down backward Chinese braille Bible with half the pages missing. At what point does all of this stuff just break down and become just a lot of stupid shiat that somebody made up? - George Carlin

2013-09-27 01:09:09 PM  
1 votes:

nekom: What's science ever done for us?

*clicks add comment*


The Aqueduct?
2013-09-27 01:07:16 PM  
1 votes:
Just call it Sharia law. Get a Muslim to speak on behalf of the anti-science point of view. Watch support disappear.
2013-09-27 01:05:02 PM  
1 votes:

super_grass: Luckily for them, the hard core post-modernists are also starting to reject empiricism because of "privilege" and "social constructs".

Looks like all derp converges at the top.


The po-mo epidemic peaked in 1996 and has been receding ever since.  The virus will always be endemic because actually understanding things is harder than bulls**ting, but the epidemic is past.
2013-09-27 12:58:09 PM  
1 votes:

parasol: truly frightening the quotes in tfa

reads like - my faith and parenting are weak - therefore, you may not expose my child to anything scientific I may have to explain - or anybody else's child because Jesus

also science fair projects invite the Devil's fire right up to the kitchen table - why else would so many of them feature Volcanos?


Not having to explain things you don't understand to your kids is like 99% of conservative social policy.
2013-09-27 12:55:43 PM  
1 votes:
We need to start treating Christians just like their ululating wacko babby raping worshiper counterparts that squat in the desert.
They are 100% the same kind of ignorant philistine schizospiritual terrorists andthey havenothing to offer society or civilizationexcept for patented fear and prejudice.
There is no place for them on this earth but an insaneasylum.
And whenarmed, they are a clear and present danger to all around.
Period.
2013-09-27 12:50:23 PM  
1 votes:
truly frightening the quotes in tfa

reads like - my faith and parenting are weak - therefore, you may not expose my child to anything scientific I may have to explain - or anybody else's child because Jesus

also science fair projects invite the Devil's fire right up to the kitchen table - why else would so many of them feature Volcanos?
2013-09-27 12:40:28 PM  
1 votes:

MaudlinMutantMollusk: Next up: renaming Liberal


That town has always confused me. It's my mother's hometown and I've been there more times than I can count (I grew up in eastern KS). I remember at a young age asking my mom, "But WHY is it called 'Liberal?'"
2013-09-27 12:38:35 PM  
1 votes:
And most of them will continue to home-school their kids anyway. Or send them to private Christian schools.

Oh, and starve the public schools of funding too. Forgot about that one.

How Jesus-y of them.
2013-09-27 12:37:56 PM  
1 votes:

Blues_X: I hope a teacher starts telling students about the Hindu view of creation.


I hope so too, because it's important to study the major religions of the world in order to understand how they have shaped the world, and how the world has shaped them.  As a computer science major, my absolute favorite non-major course in college was an objective, historic factual study of just that.  BRB I am going to become death, destroyer of worlds.
2013-09-27 12:33:51 PM  
1 votes:

Weaver95: These people are embarrassingly stupid and weirdly proud of it.


Yes. Yes they are.
 
Displayed 36 of 36 comments

View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest


This thread is closed to new comments.

Continue Farking
Submit a Link »
Advertisement
On Twitter





In Other Media


  1. Links are submitted by members of the Fark community.

  2. When community members submit a link, they also write a custom headline for the story.

  3. Other Farkers comment on the links. This is the number of comments. Click here to read them.

  4. Click here to submit a link.

Report