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(Washington Post)   Comprehensive IPCC report confirms Manbearpig as the leading cause of climate change. Just kidding, it's humans   (washingtonpost.com) divider line 314
    More: Interesting, ManBearPig, IPCC, IPCC reports, Intergovernmental Panel, climate change, Antarctic ice sheet, global warming, almost surely  
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1028 clicks; posted to Main » on 27 Sep 2013 at 12:09 PM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2013-09-27 12:10:30 PM  
Supercereal?
 
2013-09-27 12:12:09 PM  
They can't predict a thing and yet they KNOW the cause of these wrong predictions.  Report doesn't CONFIRM anything.
 
2013-09-27 12:12:50 PM  

feeder: They can't predict a thing and yet they KNOW the cause of these wrong predictions.  Report doesn't CONFIRM anything.


I know you're supercereal because you capitalize certain words.
 
2013-09-27 12:13:51 PM  

feeder: They can't predict a thing and yet they KNOW the cause of these wrong predictions.  Report doesn't CONFIRM anything.



Greenlighting stories about hoaxes may or may not cause humans to warm globes because it does unless it doesn't, doesn't it?
 
2013-09-27 12:14:26 PM  
In before graphs.
 
2013-09-27 12:14:36 PM  

feeder: They can't predict a thing and yet they KNOW the cause of these wrong predictions.  Report doesn't CONFIRM anything.


WHAT.
 
2013-09-27 12:14:53 PM  
I'm sure this report will be dismissed just like the last ones by the "ZOMG AL GORE WANTS TO TAKE MAH HUMMER AWAY" crowd of "skeptics."
 
2013-09-27 12:14:57 PM  
Oh, yea? Well I read 'Up a Yellow River' by IPDLY and he completely disagrees.
 
2013-09-27 12:16:10 PM  

Prank Call of Cthulhu: I'm sure this report will be dismissed just like the last ones by the "ZOMG AL GORE WANTS TO TAKE MAH HUMMER AWAY" crowd of "skeptics."


One of my neighbors wants to take all our grills away. Seriously, she's a farking loon.
 
2013-09-27 12:16:16 PM  
I'm not giving up my affordable meat, cheap transportation, and industry jobs.

Hey third worlders: stop using your damned wood stoves and rice paddies!
 
2013-09-27 12:16:51 PM  
This sounds like just what the UN would say before using it as an excuse to invade the US and implement martial/Sharia law.
 
2013-09-27 12:17:14 PM  
Because the interglacial warming cycle that began 14,000 years ago and continues today and which melted the glaciers, the water from which raised the sea levels 350 feet was caused by humans.
Got it.

To whom do I write the check to stop the evil warming?
Who wants to be RICH now?
 
2013-09-27 12:17:20 PM  
So, it's a biology science problem and not a climate science problem.
 
2013-09-27 12:18:43 PM  

Jclark666: This sounds like just what the UN would say before using it as an excuse to invade the US and implement martial/Sharia law.


Unlikely. They would send a bunch of strongly worded letters first, then argue over which sanctions to implement.
 
2013-09-27 12:18:58 PM  

cameroncrazy1984: feeder: They can't predict a thing and yet they KNOW the cause of these wrong predictions.  Report doesn't CONFIRM anything.

WHAT.



It makes perfect sense: We can't predict weather accurately, so there is no way we could possibly know why it happened the way it did.
Then you toss in some stuff about ivory-tower elites and money-grubbing scientists.
 
2013-09-27 12:19:28 PM  
Possibly relevant to the thread...

www.broward.k12.fl.us
 
2013-09-27 12:21:46 PM  
Cool fiction. Would read again.
 
2013-09-27 12:22:28 PM  
Since Al Gore invented climate science; let's ask him!
 
2013-09-27 12:23:05 PM  
...except CO2 is a horrible reflector of thermal and visual spectrum radiation, and water vapor isn't.  Guess which is more predominant in the atmosphere...?

Expansive areas of asphalt causing increased H2O vapor introduction into the atmosphere are the culprit, not CO2 emissions.  Our production is piss in the bucket compared to nature's CO2 output.  What we've done is reduce rapid surface absorption of water, causing more to evaporate back into the air during daylight hours.
 
2013-09-27 12:23:34 PM  
In before green text.
 
2013-09-27 12:23:55 PM  
Landmark United Nations study finds that the odds that humans are not the cause of climate change is barely 5%.

media.avclub.com

"Tho you're thaying there's a chanthe"
 
2013-09-27 12:24:10 PM  

HotIgneous Intruder: Because the interglacial warming cycle that began 14,000 years ago and continues today and which melted the glaciers, the water from which raised the sea levels 350 feet was caused by humans.
Got it.

To whom do I write the check to stop the evil warming?
Who wants to be RICH now?


Answers to this argument are here.

But you knew that already, right? I mean, we've gone through this before.
 
2013-09-27 12:24:22 PM  

HotIgneous Intruder: Because the interglacial warming cycle that began 14,000 years ago and continues today and which melted the glaciers, the water from which raised the sea levels 350 feet was caused by humans.
Got it.

To whom do I write the check to stop the evil warming?
Who wants to be RICH now?


Either you know more about the climate than most of the world's climate scientists, or.... you're an ignorant farktard spouting crap.

I'm going with option B.
 
2013-09-27 12:24:29 PM  

feeder: They can't predict a thing and yet they KNOW the cause of these wrong predictions.  Report doesn't CONFIRM anything.


YAY! You just won the argument! Creating doubt without presenting any empirical facts! I hope to see you on the talk show circuit soon (along with the other Conservative blabber mouths) because you're a natural, kid! Now the companies you care so much about, while gaining very little out of it (I doubt you own stock in or are employed by these polluting companies you support) can have carte clanche abilities to destroy the earth's ecosystem so they can maintain their profits! Good jorb!
 
2013-09-27 12:24:29 PM  
When are you guys gonna give up? No one cares enough to change anything drastically in their lives to help so just get used to it. Adapt.
 
2013-09-27 12:24:53 PM  
So over the last 15-16 years when global temperatures have be relatively flat while India and China are pumping dramatically increased CO2 into the air we can now definitely say it's humans.  So, humans stopped the warming by adding CO2 to the air.  Let's pump in more because obviously the ideal fixed earth temperature is whatever it was in the year 1900, let's say.  Scientific process!  Where's my Nobel prize??
 
2013-09-27 12:25:53 PM  

HotIgneous Intruder: Because the interglacial warming cycle that began 14,000 years ago and continues today and which melted the glaciers, the water from which raised the sea levels 350 feet was caused by humans.
Got it.

To whom do I write the check to stop the evil warming?
Who wants to be RICH now?


How DARE you question the Gore? He made a PowerPoint presentation for your sins!

/ which is more then a certian Nobel laureate did...
 
vpb [TotalFark]
2013-09-27 12:26:00 PM  

HotIgneous Intruder: Because the interglacial warming cycle that began 14,000 years ago and continues today and which melted the glaciers, the water from which raised the sea levels 350 feet was caused by humans.
Got it.


Them there evil scinsists is trying to trick us into turnin muslins!
 
2013-09-27 12:26:18 PM  
Shocking, since this has been the conclusion of 97% of scientific community.
 
2013-09-27 12:26:38 PM  
My 1000W-on-24-hours-a-day-Intratubes-porn portal agrees. It's humans. And our appliances. And our AC units. And our effluvia. Especially our effluvia.
 
2013-09-27 12:26:57 PM  
That means there's a 5% possibility it's not humans that's causing it.

img.pandawhale.com
 
2013-09-27 12:27:37 PM  
I see the deniers are already here with their tin-foil hats on.
 
2013-09-27 12:27:41 PM  

HeWhoHasNoName: ...except CO2 is a horrible reflector of thermal and visual spectrum radiation, and water vapor isn't.  Guess which is more predominant in the atmosphere...?

Expansive areas of asphalt causing increased H2O vapor introduction into the atmosphere are the culprit, not CO2 emissions.  Our production is piss in the bucket compared to nature's CO2 output.  What we've done is reduce rapid surface absorption of water, causing more to evaporate back into the air during daylight hours.


You know more about the climate than most of the world's climate scientists too? WOW! Truly Fark is lucky to have so many geniuses here.
 
2013-09-27 12:27:46 PM  
The data isn't political. The tinfoil hat crowd don't believe in climate change, but climate change believes in them.
 
2013-09-27 12:28:41 PM  

gnosis301: In before graphs.


Me, too!

Ow! That was my feelings!: Possibly relevant to the thread...

[charts&graphs.jpg]


Dammit.
 
2013-09-27 12:28:56 PM  

HotIgneous Intruder: Because the interglacial warming cycle that began 14,000 years ago and continues today and which melted the glaciers, the water from which raised the sea levels 350 feet was caused by humans.
Got it.

To whom do I write the check to stop the evil warming?
Who wants to be RICH now?


You're right guy. It's clearly a conspiracy involving 95% of the world's scientists. That's why those power hungry scientists run everything!!
 
2013-09-27 12:29:27 PM  

iheartscotch: HotIgneous Intruder: Because the interglacial warming cycle that began 14,000 years ago and continues today and which melted the glaciers, the water from which raised the sea levels 350 feet was caused by humans.
Got it.

To whom do I write the check to stop the evil warming?
Who wants to be RICH now?

How DARE you question the Gore? He made a PowerPoint presentation for your sins!

/ which is more then a certian Nobel laureate did...


The deniers just have to keep getting derpier to get through. I don't even understand this one.
 
2013-09-27 12:29:35 PM  
Breaking News!  95% of Ford dealers say now is the right time to buy a new Ford!
 
2013-09-27 12:30:17 PM  
The people that need to be convinced of this will not be convinced by this.

They are sleazy, dullard assholes.
 
2013-09-27 12:30:18 PM  

patrick767: Either you know more about the climate than most of the world's climate scientists, or.... you're an ignorant farktard spouting crap.

I'm going with option B.


Well that's just the bipolarity in your decision paradigm.

The real answer is that we're certainly in an interglacial warming period within a warmin-cooling cycle AND that humans are certainly contributing to climate change toward the warmer.

How do you like those sweet apples?

/There is no political will to stop driving and heating and cooling and lighting our homes and eating or using foods or products produced, processed, or transports using the cheap energy that fossil fuels provide, so there's that.
 
2013-09-27 12:30:55 PM  

here to help: The people that need to be convinced of this will not be convinced by this.

They are sleazy, dullard assholes.


No.
They are poor.
 
2013-09-27 12:31:25 PM  

feeder: Breaking News!  95% of Ford dealers say now is the right time to buy a new Ford!


Good try. But no.
 
2013-09-27 12:32:38 PM  
Forget all the arguing about global warming, climate change, and the associated politics. Would it be so terrible if solar and wind power, hybrid and electric motors, and sustainability initiatives were commonplace? How would that negatively affect anyone? Is it such a terrible thing to have a little responsibility?

Oh, wait, rednecks need big trucks for compensation. I forgot...
 
2013-09-27 12:32:46 PM  

doubled99: When are you guys gonna give up? No one cares enough to change anything drastically in their lives to help so just get used to it. Adapt.


Oh. So, I'm supposed to adapt to rising sea levels and more violent storms...so that you don't have to adapt to a few environmental regulations.


/Take your own advice
 
2013-09-27 12:33:06 PM  
The same "scientists" also claim that tying a plastic bag over your head will result in oxygen loss, so I think we should show them they're wrong
 
2013-09-27 12:33:45 PM  

The Beatings Will Continue Until Morale Improves: The data isn't political. The tinfoil hat crowd don't believe in climate change, but climate change believes in them.


Data isn't political? What sorcery is this? And, another thing, who's data? Everything is political now.

/ In all seriousness, if the warmers are right; we're all doomed to die horrible deaths when the planet freezes over or becomes a desert.
 
2013-09-27 12:33:51 PM  

HotIgneous Intruder: here to help: The people that need to be convinced of this will not be convinced by this.

They are sleazy, dullard assholes.

No.
They are poor.


So..you're poor/
 
2013-09-27 12:33:57 PM  
They didn't mention all the farting cattle.
 
2013-09-27 12:34:02 PM  
I only wish the report said the way to stablize the climate is everyone buys iPhones, listen to Lady Gaga/Miley, and watch soccer.
 
2013-09-27 12:34:18 PM  

feeder: So over the last 15-16 years when global temperatures have be relatively flat while India and China are pumping dramatically increased CO2 into the air we can now definitely say it's humans.  So, humans stopped the warming by adding CO2 to the air.  Let's pump in more because obviously the ideal fixed earth temperature is whatever it was in the year 1900, let's say.  Scientific process!  Where's my Nobel prize??


That's 15 years of weather. Weather does not equal climate, fool.
 
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