If you can read this, either the style sheet didn't load or you have an older browser that doesn't support style sheets. Try clearing your browser cache and refreshing the page.

(Pittsburgh Post-Gazette)   "My God, it's full of penises"   (post-gazette.com) divider line 82
    More: Amusing, Heidelberg, Pat Martin, state Department of Transportation  
•       •       •

12252 clicks; posted to Main » on 27 Sep 2013 at 10:13 AM (28 weeks ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



82 Comments   (+0 »)
   
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest

First | « | 1 | 2 | » | Last | Show all
 
2013-09-27 08:35:57 AM
Posts are by their very nature phallic, these really aren't that bad.
 
2013-09-27 08:52:11 AM
It wouldn't be so bad if they hadn't installed the Georgia O'Keefe paintings across the road.
 
2013-09-27 09:17:57 AM
That's not so bad. Nearly every one of the light fixtures in our house look like breasts.
 
2013-09-27 09:39:47 AM
Are there over nine-thousand of them?
 
2013-09-27 09:44:39 AM

Dimensio: Are there over nine-thousand of them?


Ok, I laughed. Good point.
 
2013-09-27 10:01:25 AM
Now someone just needs to take a can of black spray paint and make a little line on each one.
 
2013-09-27 10:06:08 AM
I see this is the majority of where most of the Fark community lives.
 
2013-09-27 10:14:31 AM
It's like Chatroulette, but on a sidewalk!
 
2013-09-27 10:15:57 AM
"I think those posts are too far apart. I think a small car like a Volkswagen could get through," he said.

That sounds uncomfortable.
 
2013-09-27 10:19:52 AM
Just whack a few of these about to sort the problem out.

us.123rf.com
 
2013-09-27 10:21:19 AM
memestorage.com
 
2013-09-27 10:22:07 AM

blatz514: I see this is the majority of where most of the Fark community lives.


No, there wouldn't be any complaints.

/except about size
 
2013-09-27 10:23:53 AM
From TFA:
Commissioner Bill Wells wondered whether the tops of the offending bollards could be flattened
Yes - its called circumcision
 
2013-09-27 10:26:56 AM
I've seen these in other cities and without someone pointing out what they look like I really didn't give it much thought.   Maybe because penises are on my mind enough.
 
2013-09-27 10:27:07 AM
I suggest the good people of Scott calm down unless their teenage daughters start frotting the bollards.
 
2013-09-27 10:27:28 AM
Instead of flattening the tops, I think they should drill a hole down the center and plumb them as fountains.  You could have a syncronized water display that would be the envy of Las Vegas and a year-round tourist destination.  Think outside the box, people.
 
2013-09-27 10:29:29 AM
I learned a new word, "bollard". Sounds like British slang for a dick.
 
2013-09-27 10:30:27 AM
Never mind the bollards.
 
2013-09-27 10:30:43 AM
Nobody has painted them pink?
Or black for the taller ones.
 
2013-09-27 10:30:46 AM
Sometimes a bollard is just a bollard.

If you flatten the tops, there'll be a sharper rim around the top, more likely to cause injury, and there'll be a flat surface where people will leave cups and other trash.

Much cheaper and more effective to just let the "adults" in your community get over their sixth-grade mindsets.
 
2013-09-27 10:31:22 AM
fta "People need to get their minds out of the gutters," Carnegie manager Steve Beuter said

No.

img.photobucket.com
 
2013-09-27 10:32:18 AM
Whatever it is I think I see, becomes a Tootsie Roll to me.

That was a childhood anthem that was popular among the tots back in my day, when we were breast fed on a healty slurry of patriotism, LSD, and a mandatory draft.

Now with the the Lady Gogas and the hippety hop and the feel good dipwads glorping around their padded Nintendo cubes molly coddled on no-contact sports and feel-good traffic barriers wouldn't know how to miss-see a roadside barrier if it was spoon fed to them.  If I didn't think some Castro Street funboy would sneak up behind me, throw Nipsy Russell's jockstrap over my eyes, and mount me like Trigger, I'd bend over and dry-heave.

Kids nowadays are raised to look at the world with penis-colored glasses. It sickens me.

How I long for a simpler age.

Yours in rage,

Ed Anger
 
2013-09-27 10:35:25 AM
Such a boring design.  They could have gone with:
designyoutrust.com
 
2013-09-27 10:35:47 AM

jfarkinB: Sometimes a bollard is just a bollard.

If you flatten the tops, there'll be a sharper rim around the top, more likely to cause injury, and there'll be a flat surface where people will leave cups and other trash.

Much cheaper and more effective to just let the "adults" in your community get over their sixth-grade mindsets.


No.

img.photobucket.com
 
2013-09-27 10:36:34 AM
Good thing they dont live in Amsterdam

static.autoblog.nl
 
2013-09-27 10:37:15 AM
i41.tinypic.com
 
2013-09-27 10:37:33 AM
i.imgur.com
 
2013-09-27 10:38:27 AM
FTFA:But the elongated shape and rounded top of the bollards has drawn some derision.

Dear Post-Gazette: I understand your need to maintain some level of decorum for the sake of the rapidly-aging tea-sippers who are the core readership of the Suburban Living section. But seeing as the word penis already made it past at least one editor, let's address the whole problem.

It's not just the elongated shape. It's not just the rounded top. It's the seemingly gratuitous groove molded into said top. What function could it have other than as a designer's private (snicker) joke?

db66abc2c256b763aaef-ce5d943d4869ae027976e5ad085dd9b0.r76.cf2.rackcdn.com
 
2013-09-27 10:40:17 AM
We have a few similar, but shorter and wider concrete "penises" in the city. Some of them are painted to resemble R2D2. They look cool.
 
2013-09-27 10:40:25 AM

Rembrant_Q_Einstein: Good thing they dont live in Amsterdam

img.fark.net


Yeah, i was going to say "At least they're not purple and showing veins".
 
2013-09-27 10:41:53 AM

i upped my meds-up yours: It's not just the elongated shape. It's not just the rounded top. It's the seemingly gratuitous groove molded into said top. What function could it have other than as a designer's private (snicker) joke?


The groove allows you to tether your horse cock to it when you're done riding.
 
2013-09-27 10:47:06 AM

jfarkinB: Sometimes a bollard is just a bollard.

If you flatten the tops, there'll be a sharper rim around the top, more likely to cause injury, and there'll be a flat surface where people will leave cups and other trash.

Much cheaper and more effective to just let the "adults" in your community get over their sixth-grade mindsets.


That's the best solution
 
2013-09-27 10:47:32 AM

Rembrant_Q_Einstein: Good thing they dont live in Amsterdam

[static.autoblog.nl image 225x202]


Or Bhutan?
Or South Korea?
 
2013-09-27 10:47:52 AM
i.qkme.me
 
2013-09-27 10:50:07 AM

brap: Whatever it is I think I see, becomes a Tootsie Roll to me.

That was a childhood anthem that was popular among the tots back in my day, when we were breast fed on a healty slurry of patriotism, LSD, and a mandatory draft.

Now with the the Lady Gogas and the hippety hop and the feel good dipwads glorping around their padded Nintendo cubes molly coddled on no-contact sports and feel-good traffic barriers wouldn't know how to miss-see a roadside barrier if it was spoon fed to them.  If I didn't think some Castro Street funboy would sneak up behind me, throw Nipsy Russell's jockstrap over my eyes, and mount me like Trigger, I'd bend over and dry-heave.

Kids nowadays are raised to look at the world with penis-colored glasses. It sickens me.

How I long for a simpler age.

Yours in rage,

Ed Anger


Now your kids with your loud music, and your Dan Fogleberg, your Zima, hula hoops and pac-man video games, don't you see? People today have attention spans that can only be measured in nanoseconds!

www.11points.com

Ted Denslow
 
2013-09-27 10:50:29 AM
Yeesh, how about warning us about the NSFW images, subby?
 
2013-09-27 10:53:41 AM

HailRobonia: I learned a new word, "bollard". Sounds like British slang for a dick.


We use the term in the US too. Any reinforced obstruction designed to protect doorways, fuel pumps, or whatever from vehicle damage is a bollard. Typically they are steel pipes filled with cement and painted yellow, but any design will do. The Target stores around here have big, red spherical bollards. I like to say that "Target puts the ball in bollard" when I visit their stores. Them my wife shushes me.
 
2013-09-27 10:53:59 AM
Ribbed for her pleasure.

www.idealshield.com
 
2013-09-27 10:54:29 AM

i upped my meds-up yours: FTFA:But the elongated shape and rounded top of the bollards has drawn some derision.

Dear Post-Gazette: I understand your need to maintain some level of decorum for the sake of the rapidly-aging tea-sippers who are the core readership of the Suburban Living section. But seeing as the word penis already made it past at least one editor, let's address the whole problem.

It's not just the elongated shape. It's not just the rounded top. It's the seemingly gratuitous groove molded into said top. What function could it have other than as a designer's private (snicker) joke?


Not everything is about dicks you pansy.
 
2013-09-27 10:57:28 AM

Via Infinito: That's not so bad. Nearly every one of the light fixtures in our house look like breasts.


www.rusticlodgefurnishings.com
 
2013-09-27 11:02:22 AM
I need one of these for my front porch now, to ward off the evil eye.
Perhaps town hall should install one too, to ward off bollard giggles.
 
2013-09-27 11:02:35 AM
www.annarbor.com

Size matters.
 
2013-09-27 11:04:48 AM
Bollocks?
Nah
 
2013-09-27 11:14:37 AM
Add a vertical line on either side to make it look less penis like.
 
2013-09-27 11:14:41 AM
Paris Hilton?
 
2013-09-27 11:18:53 AM
Bollocks!

Well, sort of.
 
2013-09-27 11:19:18 AM

Angry Drunk Bureaucrat: It wouldn't be so bad if they hadn't installed the Georgia O'Keefe paintings across the road.


Why not install the paintings directly on the penises
www.baltimoresun.com
farm9.staticflickr.comwww.trbimg.com
farm9.staticflickr.com
 
2013-09-27 11:22:05 AM
To some people, everything is penises. What can you do, right?
 
2013-09-27 11:22:24 AM

Sybarite: Now someone just needs to take a can of black spray paint and make a little line on each one.


whatsupchuck: Instead of flattening the tops, I think they should drill a hole down the center and plumb them as fountains.  You could have a syncronized water display that would be the envy of Las Vegas and a year-round tourist destination.  Think outside the box, people.


Now, you see - this is the kind of thinking we need more of at the local governmental level.
 
2013-09-27 11:24:43 AM

Canton: To some people, everything is penises. What can you do, right?


unhinge your jaw?
 
Displayed 50 of 82 comments

First | « | 1 | 2 | » | Last | Show all

View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest


This thread is closed to new comments.

Continue Farking
Submit a Link »






Report