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(Guardian)   What's worse than living in an impoverished rural area? Living in an impoverished rural area COVERED IN BEES   (theguardian.com) divider line 30
    More: Scary, covered in bees, rural areas, er doctor, Shaanxi Province, bees  
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3122 clicks; posted to Main » on 26 Sep 2013 at 1:56 PM (29 weeks ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



30 Comments   (+0 »)
   
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest
 
2013-09-26 11:34:33 AM
Those are HORNETS, not bees!
 
vpb [TotalFark]
2013-09-26 12:20:44 PM
What's worse than being covered in bees?  Being covered in hornets!
 
2013-09-26 12:53:05 PM
Bees, hornets, whatever

i20.photobucket.com
 
2013-09-26 01:09:20 PM
"You live in a crappy wasteland."

"That's bad."

"But you have to scratch out a living as a subsistence farmer!"

"That's...also bad."

"You can also be an intinerant laborer."

"That's still bad."

"You will be repeatedly swarmed by giant hornets who will sting you in your eyeballs until your kidneys fail."

"..."

"That's bad."

"Can I move now?"
 
2013-09-26 01:25:37 PM
www.rocklamanna.com

Wow, my 2nd Tommy Boy post
 
2013-09-26 01:57:51 PM
BEADS?
 
2013-09-26 02:02:18 PM
I, for one, welcome our new hornet overlords.
 
2013-09-26 02:06:14 PM
www.filmrant.net
Not the bees!!!!!
 
2013-09-26 02:15:09 PM
wtfacts.org

Thanks, God
 
2013-09-26 02:22:34 PM
What's all this buzz about?
 
2013-09-26 02:24:57 PM
Ooh, fertile recruiting territory!

pichars.org
 
2013-09-26 02:34:13 PM
What's worse than living in an impoverished rural area?

Living in an urban area!
 
2013-09-26 02:35:14 PM
First read that as "Living in an impoverished rural area COVERED IN BEETS"
 
2013-09-26 02:42:33 PM
oprahbees.gif

Too lazy to find it.
 
2013-09-26 02:51:59 PM
Come on people:

img.fark.net
 
2013-09-26 02:53:40 PM
Bees would be one thing.  I can handle bees.

These, on the other hand, are NOT bees but are those giant Asian hornets that are a bit of hymenopteran nightmare fuel (which will be injected by their giant stinger which will cause your flesh to dissolve and call the other giant FARK YOU hornets to sting the everloving FARK out of you in a way that Africanised bees can only look at and go "DAMN").

<insert thisisnotabeethisisafarkingwasp.jpg>
 
2013-09-26 02:56:28 PM

Cagey B: "You live in a crappy wasteland."

"That's bad."

"But you have to scratch out a living as a subsistence farmer!"

"That's...also bad."

"You can also be an intinerant laborer."

"That's still bad."

"You will be repeatedly swarmed by giant hornets who will sting you in your eyeballs until your kidneys fail."

"..."

"That's bad."

"Can I move now?"


Wait, why didn't I get my free frogurt?
 
2013-09-26 03:00:04 PM
 
2013-09-26 03:04:58 PM
img.gawkerassets.com

I know, I know. Wrong country. Still.
 
2013-09-26 04:02:42 PM

Great Porn Dragon: Bees would be one thing.  I can handle bees.

These, on the other hand, are NOT bees but are those giant Asian hornets that are a bit of hymenopteran nightmare fuel (which will be injected by their giant stinger which will cause your flesh to dissolve and call the other giant FARK YOU hornets to sting the everloving FARK out of you in a way that Africanised bees can only look at and go "DAMN").

<insert thisisnotabeethisisafarkingwasp.jpg>


5cm long.  That's 2 inches if you don't parlez le metric system.
Holy crap.
 
2013-09-26 04:05:32 PM
Renal failure. It sounds like they sting the piss out of you.
 
2013-09-26 06:31:51 PM
Ive seen those giant asian hornets here in the US. Get ready to have them as an invasive species.
 
2013-09-26 07:11:54 PM

Oldiron_79: Ive seen those giant asian hornets here in the US. Get ready to have them as an invasive species.


We should convince the Chinese that they are an aphrodisiac, and then they'll hunt them down for us.
 
2013-09-26 09:05:49 PM
I prefer my hornets covered in bees.

//Which is how Asian honeybees fight off invading hornets - they form a vibrating "bee ball" around the hornet, cooking it to death!
 
2013-09-27 07:51:13 AM

FrancoFile: Oldiron_79: Ive seen those giant asian hornets here in the US. Get ready to have them as an invasive species.

We should convince the Chinese that they are an aphrodisiac, and then they'll hunt them down for us.


Brilliant! Giant hornet stinger makes your stinger bigger, pass it on.
 
2013-09-27 08:44:52 AM

Oldiron_79: Ive seen those giant asian hornets here in the US. Get ready to have them as an invasive species.


Some idiot will get the idea to cross-breed them with a native hornet and create something ten times worse.
 
2013-09-27 12:08:40 PM
img.fark.net
 
2013-09-27 02:01:25 PM

Oldiron_79: Ive seen those giant asian hornets here in the US. Get ready to have them as an invasive species.


Really? are you sure you didn't see these instead?

Here is a helpful image of the U.S.  nightmare called the European Hornet (although this one is really small):

pics.davesgarden.com

And  picture of their weaponry with a nifty scale for good measure:

upload.wikimedia.org

/why yes, I have been stung by one of them before... the only one that could catch up.
 
2013-09-27 03:49:19 PM

washington-babylon: Oldiron_79: Ive seen those giant asian hornets here in the US. Get ready to have them as an invasive species.

Really? are you sure you didn't see these instead?

Here is a helpful image of the U.S.  nightmare called the European Hornet (although this one is really small):



And  picture of their weaponry with a nifty scale for good measure:



/why yes, I have been stung by one of them before... the only one that could catch up.


Nope, bigger and different head shape.
 
2013-09-27 05:27:18 PM

Oldiron_79: Nope, bigger and different head shape.


And yes, in case people are wondering--these bits of hymenopteran nightmare fuel (the Asian giant hornet) HAVE been detected in parts of the Southeast and Midwest US (particularly around air shipping hubs as accidental imports)--so it's entirely possible he did see the nastier Asian relative.  (There have also been reliable reports of accidental importation in Arlington Heights, IL; again, accidental import, possibly from air freight at O'Hare.  Supposedly they're in Kentucky, too; wouldn't shock me with the big UPS hub at SDF.  Some reliable reports from Indiana too.)

In addition to what folks have noted (courtesy of the Educational Oatmeal Comic), these are things that are literally the size of hummingbirds, VERY aggressive (even more so than Africanised bees--BREATHING near them can be enough to set the farkers off), have overtly neurotoxic venom (enough that ten stings is considered a major medical emergency even in China) that itself contains pheromones to call the whole hive over to fark your shiat up, and explicitly target honeybee nests for nomming their larvae.   (I'm not usually one for killing insects outright--I'm usually content to live and let live as long as they stay in the Big Blue Room outside and are not making nests in my house--but Asian hornets are really one of those things where I say both "Burn it with fire" and "This thing existing--along with the existence of screwworms, Guinea worms and brain-eating amoeba--are proof that if young-earth creationists were right that the Abrahamic God is a sick and twisted farkstick who obviously invented these things for purposes of population control in case the hairless apes got uppity again".)

/then again, the very existence of screwworms and Asian giant hornets and Guinea worms and brain-eating amoebas pretty much is proof in and of itself that if <DEITY> exists it really isn't all that arsed with humanity to begin with
//not to mention that evolution is NOT exactly concerned with What Is Best For Humanity
 
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