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(Black Sports Online)   OJ Simpson busted for stealing cookies out of Prison cafeteria   (blacksportsonline.com) divider line 43
    More: Stupid, O.J. Simpson  
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1662 clicks; posted to Sports » on 26 Sep 2013 at 12:03 PM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



43 Comments   (+0 »)
   
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2013-09-26 10:22:51 AM  
Sources say that the other prisoners originally thought OJ had a cell phone or some other item that was absolutely forbidden behind bars, but when everyone saw that it was cookies, the whole cafeteria exploded with laughter.

Oh to be a fly on the wall to see that
 
2013-09-26 10:23:44 AM  
He claims he's innocent, but he's already working on a book.

www.blogcdn.com
 
2013-09-26 10:25:41 AM  
If there are no chips, you must acquit
 
2013-09-26 10:26:49 AM  
Who stole the cookies from the cookie jar?
OJ Stole the cookies from the cookie jar!

blacksportsonline.com

Who me?
 
2013-09-26 10:27:43 AM  
Will he dedicate the remainder of his sentence to finding the real cookie thief?
 
2013-09-26 10:27:56 AM  
Too bad their only evidence is a dark leather glove in the jar
 
2013-09-26 10:41:57 AM  
Those Keebler Elves are the REAL killers!
 
2013-09-26 10:43:10 AM  
If it got no chip, you must acquit.
 
2013-09-26 10:45:15 AM  
That face is begging to be photoshopped
 
2013-09-26 10:54:18 AM  
OJ "Cookie Monster" Simpson
blacksportsonline.com
 
2013-09-26 11:02:04 AM  

Lucky LaRue: Who stole the cookies from the cookie jar?
OJ Stole the cookies from the cookie jar!

[blacksportsonline.com image 635x447]

Who me?


Yes you!
 
2013-09-26 11:39:57 AM  

MaudlinMutantMollusk: OJ "Cookie Monster" Simpson
[blacksportsonline.com image 635x447]


Oh ferchrissake. I know the guy's a sociopath, but that picture makes me feel sorry for him. He's just so desperate to be loved and believed, and doesn't have a clue that he is sick and unloved.

This is how I ended up with so many bad boyfriends.
 
2013-09-26 12:07:15 PM  
Steal cookies, get in a pickle.
 
2013-09-26 12:12:29 PM  
I'd only ask three cookies apiece for my co-workers, if that seems fair. I think a man working outdoors feels more like a man if he can have a oatmeal cookie. That's only my opinion.
 
2013-09-26 12:13:26 PM  
Man. I feel really bad for Buffalo sometimes.
 
2013-09-26 12:14:15 PM  

ChrisDe: I'd only ask three cookies apiece for my co-workers, if that seems fair. I think a man working outdoors feels more like a man if he can have a oatmeal cookie. That's only my opinion.


Get a load of this guy! 'Coworkers.' Heh.
 
2013-09-26 12:15:12 PM  
I TOLD you we has a criminal! i1182.photobucket.com
 
2013-09-26 12:20:20 PM  

bionicjoe: ChrisDe: I'd only ask three cookies apiece for my co-workers, if that seems fair. I think a man working outdoors feels more like a man if he can have a oatmeal cookie. That's only my opinion.

Get a load of this guy! 'Coworkers.' Heh.


As for OJ, he spent that break hunkered in the shade, a strange little smile on his face, watching us eat his oatmeal cookies.
 
2013-09-26 12:31:11 PM  

Captain Steroid: I TOLD you we has a criminal! [i1182.photobucket.com image 35x35]


The image did it. I love you.
 
2013-09-26 12:39:15 PM  
Has he vowed to search for the real cookie thief?

blog.beknownforsomething.com
 
2013-09-26 12:50:05 PM  
farking mark furman always framing the juice.  now for petty thief in the clink?  for shame mark.
 
2013-09-26 12:53:45 PM  
"Ladies and gentlemen of the jury, this is not the face of a man who stole a dozen oatmeal cook... dammit."

pixel.nymag.com
 
2013-09-26 12:58:18 PM  

A Fark Handle: farking mark furman always framing the juice.  now for petty thief in the clink?  for shame mark.


Mark Furman's success story should be an inspriation to us all.

www.cnn.com

Only in American can a young white cop go from calling OJ Simpson a N*gger and causing an acquittal in one of the most cut and dry murder trials in American history, to being an attractive and successful Fox News commenter.

cloudfront.mediamatters.org

He, like Oliver North, should be an inspiration to us all. GOD BLESS AMERICA!
 
2013-09-26 01:04:42 PM  
Oh well....that's the way the cookie crumbles
 
2013-09-26 01:06:41 PM  
2.bp.blogspot.com
 
2013-09-26 01:28:47 PM  
4.bp.blogspot.com
 
2013-09-26 01:39:48 PM  

T.rex: [4.bp.blogspot.com image 850x531]


so you're saying someone should have locked their god damn cookie jar and there would be no cookie thieves?
 
2013-09-26 01:39:52 PM  
The fact OJ Simpson is in prison makes me happy.  Doesn't matter what he's there for, just the fact his sorry, no-good, getting-away-with-double-homicide ass is in jail makes me smile a little brighter.  I hope he doesn't even look his children in the eye anymore.
 
2013-09-26 01:48:54 PM  

freak7: Coco LaFemme: The fact OJ Simpson is in prison makes me happy.

The fact that he hasn't been shanked and/or ass raped makes me sad. :(


Yeah, like they let a guy like that in gen-pop. It's like dangling a baby in front of a pack of dingoes.
 
2013-09-26 01:53:57 PM  

Coco LaFemme: The fact OJ Simpson is in prison makes me happy.


freak7: The fact that he hasn't been shanked and/or ass raped makes me sad. :(


That hertz OJ's feelings!

2.bp.blogspot.com
 
2013-09-26 01:58:27 PM  

freak7: Coco LaFemme: The fact OJ Simpson is in prison makes me happy.

The fact that he hasn't been shanked and/or ass raped makes me sad. :(


to be fair, it's really farked up that anal rape is sort of an accepted part of the american justice system.  the juice maybe a murderer, but everyone should be able to serve time without the rape.
 
2013-09-26 02:04:33 PM  
If only there was a place they could put people who do this kind of thing.
 
2013-09-26 02:46:21 PM  
rjakobi: Yeah, like they let a guy like that in gen-pop. It's like dangling a baby in front of a pack of dingoes.

Not amused by your verbal shenanigans:

4.bp.blogspot.com

A couple of OJ-related CSB moments:

I had a flight to New York scheduled for the afternoon that OJ and Al decided it was a good idea to completely fark up the Los Angeles freeway system in a white Bronco. My friends who were taking me to LAX didn't want to leave, they were riveted by the coverage. I made it with 5 minutes to spare [shakes fist at OJ and Al].

I worked in a large call-center that took up a building the size of a city block during the whole OJ trial. When the verdict was being announced, the place just froze, work completely stopped. When the verdict was read, some people cheered, some cursed. It was the creepiest sound, echoing around that large building.

What I imagine OJ looked like the night Nicole and Ron Goldman were killed:

www.inlander.com
 
2013-09-26 03:18:05 PM  

Henry Holland: What I imagine OJ looked like the night Nicole and Ron Goldman were killed:


he doesn't seem like the sort of man who would wear a dress...
 
2013-09-26 03:55:02 PM  
Man.  What a crumb...
 
2013-09-26 05:10:14 PM  

A Fark Handle: T.rex: [4.bp.blogspot.com image 850x531]

so you're saying someone should have locked their god damn cookie jar and there would be no cookie thieves?


WHAT IS THIS MICKEY MOUSE shiat????
wHAT ARE YOU DOING IN MY THREAD?????
 
2013-09-26 06:31:13 PM  

skrame: "Ladies and gentlemen of the jury, this is not the face of a man who stole a dozen oatmeal cook... dammit."


img.fark.net

Is it just me, or does OJ look like a black Ed Asner in the right photo?
 
2013-09-26 06:48:33 PM  
It actually kind of bothers me that a man who got away scot-free with double murder was essentially given a life sentence for something that in all likelihood didn't deserve any jail time whatsoever. Am I the only one who has a problem with this "two wrongs make a right" miscarriage of justice?  If so, I will retract my objections to the way his kidnapping case was handled.
 
2013-09-26 06:55:48 PM  

Why Would I Read the Article: It actually kind of bothers me that a man who got away scot-free with double murder was essentially given a life sentence for something that in all likelihood didn't deserve any jail time whatsoever. Am I the only one who has a problem with this "two wrongs make a right" miscarriage of justice?  If so, I will retract my objections to the way his kidnapping case was handled.


I should feel bad.  Any decent, freedom-lovin' 'Murican should.  However, I just can't bring myself to give a fark when it comes to OJ Simpson.  I've seen pictures of what he did to those people, especially Nicole.  I have not a single ounce of pity for him, and I never will.  Does that make me a bad person?  In a way, yeah.  I consider this karma righting itself.
 
2013-09-26 07:56:56 PM  

Why Would I Read the Article: It actually kind of bothers me that a man who got away scot-free with double murder was essentially given a life sentence for something that in all likelihood didn't deserve any jail time whatsoever. Am I the only one who has a problem with this "two wrongs make a right" miscarriage of justice?  If so, I will retract my objections to the way his kidnapping case was handled.


Armed robbery isn't deserving of jail time?
 
2013-09-26 08:52:21 PM  

stir22: A Fark Handle: T.rex: [4.bp.blogspot.com image 850x531]

so you're saying someone should have locked their god damn cookie jar and there would be no cookie thieves?

WHAT IS THIS MICKEY MOUSE shiat????
wHAT ARE YOU DOING IN MY THREAD?????


Why is OJ Simpson out of his bunk after lights-out? Why is OJ Simpson holding that weapon? Why aren't you stomping OJ Simpsons guts out?

Sir. Uhhh... he's holding a weapon, dude, I thought I mentioned that... and he's demonstrated a certain proficiency with edged weapons. Imunna let you take this one. ..........Sir.
 
2013-09-27 01:43:43 AM  
Some misguided sailors on this ship still think they can pull a fast one on me. Well, they're very much mistaken. Since you've taken this course, the innocent will be punished with the guilty. There will be no liberty for any member of this crew for three months. I will not be made a fool of! Do you hear me?
.www.nolandalla.com
 
2013-09-27 04:40:15 PM  

Why Would I Read the Article: It actually kind of bothers me that a man who got away scot-free with double murder was essentially given a life sentence for something that in all likelihood didn't deserve any jail time whatsoever. Am I the only one who has a problem with this "two wrongs make a right" miscarriage of justice?  If so, I will retract my objections to the way his kidnapping case was handled.


Please. There's no question OJ deserved to go to jail for what he did. It's armed robbery. Yes, someone stole his stuff, but that's what police are for. You don't break into someones place with guns and demand items back.

The real crime isn't that, but the fact that Thomas Riccio never went to jail also. He basically set OJ up, recorded everyone on tape, sold it for profit to TMZ and news stations, then testified against OJ at trial when he was given immunity. He's a scumbag.
 
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