BravadoGT: But between (a) those people who want to protect their business relationships and (b) those people who won't dare to risk offending Muslims (either out of fear or political correctness)...
_____ before you start reading the email just remember that sometimes releasing hate filled invective at absolute corruption is a healthy thing.Am I still asleep, possibly high, perhaps inadvertently tripping on LSD from some under cooked moldy bread? With a little luck perhaps I will collapse have a series of convulsions and accuse some one of being a witch and using malevolent forces against me. Cause there is just no way that I just read that Qatar got the 2022 World Cup. On the positive side, after accusing some one of being a witch I am pretty sure that Qatar has a legal system all set up for the burning of witches. And, considering the country's average summer temperatures being lit on fire could in fact be more comfortable then playing on one of the still nonexistent 15 air conditioned stadiums. On the plus side, this should help the US team as we could spend several months preparing for this by practicing in Texas. This of course depends upon whether the inevitable terrorist attack doesn't take out the US team as Qatar is a well thought out rational place who literally have dozens of neighbors who hobbies don't include strapping a dynamite filled vest then going out for a picnic. Oh wait, never mind, I was confusing Qatar with some other country that wasn't totally surrounded by a whole series of the most unstable nut bag countries with terroristic tendencies in the world.What truly boggles my mind about this decision is not that that FIFA is corrupt, but the staggering shortsightedness of its corruption. Think about this just for a minute the difference in simply the ticket sale revenues between running he World Cup in Qatar and in the US is going to be at the minimum tens of million dollars. Since, I find it unlikely that all of the new stadiums they are going to build will seat 80,000 plus. Instead, their new indoor stadiums will most likely be in the 30,000-50,000 seat range. So lets just conservatively estimate that they are giving up a minimum of 1 to 2 million fewer tickets sold at the gate. At the conservative estimate of the price of about 70 dollars a ticket, well that is simply leaving $140 million off the table. Know I don't have the economic knowledge to figure what the difference is in the TV rights that that FIFA just gave up, but let's conservatively put this in the billions. Simply guessing I believe that Qatar is about ~10 hours ahead of the East Coast, so this means that a game that starts at 11am there (to avoid the afternoon heat) will start at 1am here. Perfect for the amphetamine using serial killers that FIFA apparently believes make up the majority of its audience in the Western hemisphere.In so many ways what makes this staggering is that FIFA just walked away from a lot more money for short term bribes. Their executive committed decided that it was better to enrich themselves today then enrich the entire organization on a far vaster scale over the next 10 years. So if you're a lower member of the FIFA organization you know must be aware that they just stole from your future marketing and television kick backs, for a relatively few short term bribes. By the way you know when an organization is to corrupt when there corruption is so staggering that there is no logical argument for choice other then Swiss bank accounts. I mean, wow 840,000 people in a nation slightly smaller then Connecticut, (amusingly the population doubles if you count their slave-like indentured workforce). I don't count them since they can't vote and have no rights. However you can get up to 1.3 million if you count them as 3/5 of a person.Don't even get me started on the cultural Mecca that is Qatar. Did you hear that they have an indulgent monarch who actually always drinking at the hotel's mainly frequented by Westerns, and all other people from countries that don't specialize in wife beating, camel humping, and domestic servant abuse? But don't worry if any thing happens you can appeal to Qatar legislative branch, oh wait it hasn't been in service since 1970, and coincidentally that's when they had their last election, but don't worry the King has 35 appointed advisers. Whose advice probably goes along the line of "Yes, its glorious that the king has an eight inch cock.", and "After careful consideration we do believe that the Filipino and Pakistani domestic workers enjoy getting raped, their screams are simply a cultural way to announce enjoyment." When you think about this World Cup could be described as a delightful visit to a cultural wasteland that will make East Texas look like farking Broadway. They're really just one step from being asked the question "Can I bring my slave?", "If my six year old wife resists sexual relations, can I beat her until she is dead or simply until I have broken here soul?" _____, I am sure at this point your asking "Are you sure you're not just over reacting and stereotyping the complex centuries old culture of the Middle East due to your well know anti-Muslim bias?" Well, NO! Here's how the CIA World Fact book describes Qatar.Current Situation: Qatar is a destination country for men and women from South and Southeast Asia who migrate willingly, but are subsequently trafficked into involuntary servitude as domestic workers and laborers, and, to a lesser extent, commercial sexual exploitation; the most common offense was forcing workers to accept worse contract terms than those under which they were recruited; other conditions include bonded labor, withholding of pay, restrictions on movement, arbitrary detention, and physical, mental, and sexual abuse.Tier Rating: Tier 2 Watch List - the Government of Qatar does not fully comply with the minimum standards for the elimination of trafficking; however, it is making significant efforts to do so; in February 2009, Qatar enacted a new migrant worker sponsorship law that criminalizes some practices commonly used by trafficking offenders, and it announced plans to use that law effectively to prevent human trafficking; punishment for offenses related to trafficking in persons remains lower than that for crimes such as rape and kidnapping, and the Qatari government has yet to take significant action to investigate, prosecute, and punish trafficking offenses; the government continues to lack formal victim identification procedures and, as a result, victims of trafficking are likely punished for acts committed as a direct result of being trafficked (2009)My favorite part is the second part where they admit the "Qatari government has yet to take significant action to investigate, prosecute, and punish trafficking offense." When this is just publicly stated, and not even leaked via WikiLeaks let me translate. "Too many government officials including the royal family and probably the King himself are having too much fun raping, torturing, and beating our imported slave workforce to bother with any sort of enforcement of laws that make the conditions so revolting and immoral. That even the US government (note: Qatar is hosting the entire planning and logistic wing of the US Middle Eastern Fleet) cannot morally look the other way." This is the same organization, the CIA, which in the last decade has only abducted, tortured and murdered scores of innocent people, that is actually offended by Qatar's treatment of the labor force. That's right, returning home from secret CIA prisons, which are probably located in Qatar, CIA agents after a hard day of water boarding and beatings are offended with Qatar's treatment of their workforce. Way to farking go Qatar!Actually my favorite part of the above statement is that the first part declares that the government of Qatar is "making significant effort", but within two lines, not even a full paragraph, later the author acknowledges that the government has taken basically no action. You know it's a crappy lie when you can't even maintain the lie for an entire paragraph. I mean this is the equivalent of saying "I did not kill that women, well maybe I chocked her for a while, shot her in the head, lit her on fire, and feed her into a wood chipper, but I am not 100% convinced that I killed her."I am also looking forward to the culture shock in 2022 when soccer fans enter Qatar. I mean no offense to Qatar but how are you going to deal with the European, Asian, South American, African, and North American soccer fans who routinely watch games inebriated? Are you going to start caning them, or is that only for union organizers? What about women I know your more tolerant then some of your neighbors and actually allow people to see the eyes of a woman, any maybe on a non religious holiday even an ankle? Have you meet the European fans? I am not even going to start on the debauchery that is the Brazilian fan base (God bless them! I do every world cup). Is the Qatar government gong to simply look the other way for two months or will in between games there be public canings? By the way has any one bothered to ask what happens if Israel makes the World Cup? Will they be allowed in, or would that be a bridge too far the magical land of Qatar? On a more concerning note are they going to allow Jews who play for other counties to enter their country?Well, hopeful this is all a nightmare and minutes from now I will wake up to discover that we lost the World Cup to Australia, a delightful nation of 20 million with a long history of hosting large sporting events such as the Olympics. A nation whose human rights record could not accurately be described as well it's marginally betters the Saudi Arabia's and North Korea's. By the way, why not North Korea at this point? Since apparently having a government that respects basic human dignity is no longer even a remote requirement, and judging for Russia's and Qatar's wins may in fact be held against you for voting purposes.On a side note doesn't this just make the Olympics look relatively clean and well run? I mean the Olympics are generally decided by who will spend the most money hosting the Olympics, sure there is a tremendous amount of bribery but generally the country that wins is the one that volunteers the most money for the games. At no point have I looked at an Olympic choice and said, "Honestly, that just bribery." I cannot think of a single site chosen for the Olympics that didn't pass the laugh test.On an ancillary side note the Foreign Corrupt Service (FCS) act allows American courts to prosecute third party corruption involving US based organization. Since MLS and US Soccer are each based in the US we should probably start writing our congress man and ask for an investigation. I mean at this point its pretty clear that we will never get another Olympics or World Cup as long as the FCS is law and we cant make it "RAIN!!" for a whole series of unelected corrupt foreign potentates. So, we might as well indict all of their asses for bribery and corruption, and given the fact that just recently the EU forced Switzerland to weaken its privacy laws. I am willing to bet that a good old congressional subpoena could get some nice bits of information.By the way this is probably a record for me. I don't send you my normal hate filled sports emails, but at around 2000 words this has got to be the longest, most bitter hate filled sports related email I have written in some time. I would also like to preemptively apologize for setting off your workplace e-mail filter, but by the time you read this you're probably already expecting a call from IT about the hate filled e-mail.
If you like these links, you'll love
More funny for your money.
Sign up for the Fark NotNewsletter!
Links are submitted by members of the Fark community.
When community members submit a link, they also write a custom headline for the story.
Other Farkers comment on the links. This is the number of comments. Click here to read them.
You need to create an account to submit links or post comments.
Click here to submit a link.
Also on Fark
Submit a Link »
Copyright © 1999 - 2017 Fark, Inc | Last updated: Dec 14 2017 10:33:32
Runtime: 0.248 sec (247 ms)