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(West Volusia Beacon)   The city will happily take cash, check, or a credit card to pay your water bill, but they won't take crack cocaine   (beacononlinenews.com) divider line 21
    More: Florida, crack cocaine, credit cards  
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2314 clicks; posted to Main » on 23 Sep 2013 at 4:44 PM (48 weeks ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



21 Comments   (+0 »)
   
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2013-09-23 04:45:44 PM
This just in, the government will not barter to settle debt.
 
2013-09-23 04:47:36 PM
s24.postimg.org
 
2013-09-23 04:48:00 PM
What about chickens?
 
2013-09-23 04:48:30 PM
...Well, not officially, at least.
 
2013-09-23 04:48:49 PM
It's not like they could have fit any Ningis on the B Ark before landing in Florida. And the leaf is still far too devalued.
 
2013-09-23 04:50:01 PM
media.giphy.com

The offender in question
 
2013-09-23 04:50:24 PM
Repectfully disagrees:

media.nbcwashington.com
 
2013-09-23 04:54:18 PM
ftfa--

"........after a customer handed a cashier an envelope with a white powder in it.........
The powder was tested.
"Interestingly enough, it was crack cocaine," Haught said.
"


I do find it quite interesting because i never knew crack came in powder form. wouldn't powder form simply be COCAINE?

wait. i bet the envelope was handed over by a black man. NOW i get it.
 
2013-09-23 04:59:23 PM
Pro Tip:
If you have two envelopes, say one with rent and one with crack in it, put a label on the envelope.  That way you know which one to give the person for rent.

\I wonder how many of these stories are something like when his girlfriend helped him pack his luggage and forgot to tell him about the loaded revolver.
 
2013-09-23 05:04:16 PM
Yet.
 
2013-09-23 05:05:30 PM
Seems like a logical choice, if I could pay with something that's usually inflated to be 20x its worth, why not?
 
2013-09-23 05:20:12 PM
Subby, that is simply not true.
 
2013-09-23 05:28:03 PM
HA! I just paid my bill with $22 of crack, two oxys (the kind you can't grind up and shoot 'cause it gets all gelly...so subtract like, $50), my "new" TV, my old Tussin with codine, and a pit bull puppy.

Suckers.
 
2013-09-23 05:33:44 PM
I'm reminded of a very young Chris Rock in I'm gonna git you Sucka.

Hammer: How may I help you sir?
Rib Joint Customer: How much for an order of ribs?
Hammer: Two Fifty
Rib Joint Customer: Two Fifty? How many ribs do I get with that?
Hammer: Ahhh, about five
Rib Joint Customer: Five
[does math on his hand]
Rib Joint Customer: So I guess that's about fifty cents a rib, huh?
Hammer: Yeeaaa, about
Rib Joint Customer: K, lemme get one
Hammer: Right on
[yells to the cook]
Hammer: One order
Slammer: One order of ribs
Rib Joint Customer: No, no... no, no... one rib
Hammer: [Holds up finger] One. Rib.
Rib Joint Customer: I sure am hungry
Hammer: Uhhhh, make that... one... rib... to go
Slammer: One rib?
Hammer: One rib...
[sigh]
Hammer: What else?
Rib Joint Customer: You got any soda?
Hammer: [says slowly] One... dolla...
Rib Joint Customer: Aww, come'on now... look out for a brotha... man... come'on... Hey check this out, why don't you let me get a sip for fifteen cents
Hammer: [Pissed] My cups cost more than fifteen cents!
Rib Joint Customer: Alright, F - - the cup, pour it in my hands for a dime
Hammer: [Grabs him by his shirt] Look you greasy hair Jheri curl wearin - - Pay me & get the hell out of my store
Rib Joint Customer: [Takes out change, counts it] ...
[Then, pulls out a HUGE wad of bills]
Rib Joint Customer: ... You got change for a hundred
 
2013-09-23 05:35:09 PM

megarian: Subby, that is simply not true.


Detroit doesn't count.
 
2013-09-23 05:46:47 PM
I don't think cities take any commodities as payment, licit or not.
 
2013-09-23 06:10:45 PM
Let's return to the English language and refer to the substances in question as 'cocaine hydrochloride.' and 'cocaine free-base.'
 
2013-09-23 06:15:33 PM

lockers: megarian: Subby, that is simply not true.

Detroit doesn't count.


We have calculators on our cellphones, asshole.

And we're the shiat at the metric system.

Oh. OH. About the bill payment. Yeah, you're right.
 
2013-09-23 06:56:20 PM

megarian: lockers: megarian: Subby, that is simply not true.

Detroit doesn't count.

We have calculators on our cellphones, asshole.

And we're the shiat at the metric system.

Oh. OH. About the bill payment. Yeah, you're right.


Good thing you have a calculator to figure out Real Merican measurements.
 
2013-09-23 07:01:10 PM

lockers: megarian: Subby, that is simply not true.

Detroit doesn't count.


I was glad to see the FL tag, as I can think of several MI cities where this could happen.
 
2013-09-23 07:23:31 PM
i306.photobucket.com
 
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