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(Slate)   This handy map shows the most popular baby names parents gave their children, broken down by state. There will be a lot of Liams and Emmas running around the Midwest, and Florida will have an abundance of Jaydens and Isabellas   (slate.com) divider line 23
    More: Fail, Midwest, abundance  
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12242 clicks; posted to Main » on 22 Sep 2013 at 12:26 PM (49 weeks ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



Voting Results (Funniest)
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest

2013-09-22 01:26:24 PM
2 votes:
Two tests people:

1) The president or porn star test
Say, out loud "Now, ladies and gentlemen, the president of the united states <name>"  Then say out loud, "Now, Ladies and gentlemen, on pole number 7, <name>!"

2) The Jr High Locker Room test: Take the name and think of all the cruel ways a 7th grade will use that name to mock and insult your child, or make a nickname that rhymes with any common name for genitalia.
2013-09-22 12:55:09 PM
2 votes:
You think these names are weird, but I'd like to see a list of most popular inner-city names.
2013-09-22 12:40:57 PM
2 votes:
The dash isn't silent
2013-09-22 12:35:10 PM
2 votes:
Honestly I'm surprised "Pablo" and "Esperanza" aren't the most popular names in the south what with the way the Spanics are shiatting out little mouths for EBT to feed.
2013-09-22 12:28:58 PM
2 votes:
Met a girl this week with three small kids. Names were Nirvana, Teegan, and Bronx. No, I'm not kidding.
2013-09-22 12:23:51 PM
2 votes:
Listen I can see the two sides of this very much. One side says that if you give the child of you the unique name then they can do the standing out from the crowd. The other side of this says to provide to the child of you the most common names of the others so they can have the sharing in the glory of the name. I do not know which side of this is the correct side and am doing the asking of you the Fark.com members but I can also provide to you the reasons for each of the sides to provide the greater chance of making the decision through the information upon which has been the provision of me. You are welcome.

One side of this says to provide to the child of you the unique name. The reason for this side is the simple one. In the twenty years the child of you can have the LAUGHTERS OLS about the individuals who all have the same names and also play the prankings by doing the drive to Texas and go to the crowd to say JACOBBBBBBB. Or perhaps to Nebraska to say, "LIAMMMMMMMM." Or perhaps to Florida to say, "JAYDENNNNNN." This last one of course is the jokings of me because if the child of you goes to the area of Florida upon which Jayden is said he will be the one who has the shankings provided. Now this side is also saying that perhaps the child of you will stand out on the resume because the person who is doing the hiring will say OH NO NOT THE NEW APPLICANT NAMED SOPHIA! WE HAVE EIGHT OF THOSE ALREADY IN THE OFFICE OF THIS! Then they will wish for hiring the unique named child of you because they will say OH THIS IS THE APPLICANT OF THE NAME DAWNLIZABETH THIS IS THE NAME WHICH IS EASY FOR REMEMBRANCE OF!  Of course there is also the bad parts of this and that is that listen no one cares about the stupid unique name of the child of you. What will you do also continue doing the wiping of this child into the 20s. The unique name does not provide to you the uniqueness because you are not the individual who is that different from the rest of the people who wish for the difference. Do you see this. By trying to be the person upon which is different you are just being the person who is the same. BAM the head of you did the explosion. It is okay I am here for you to do the explanation.

The other side of this is the simple one and that is that if you provide to the child of you the same name as many others then it makes the job of the teacher much easier. The roommate of me is the bigger person and she always is doing the ordering at the Starbucks. She gets the creme frappucino with extra creme and gets three of these at the time and they often say the name of she without ever doing the misspelling of this like they do with many of the names having uniqueness. JESSICA THE ORDER OF YOU IS READY is what is said by they. The other reason for this is that if you provide to the child the name upon which everyone has then they can be the better person of pulling the crime spree because the witness to this will say SHE DID THE ANSWERING TO THE NAME OF EMMA. Well now this does not offer the provision of helping to catch the person because listen to how many of these there are. The problem with choosing the name which is popular is that listen you are being the schmuck. Mason? Really? LAUGHTER OL that is the dumbest name perhaps only rivaled by Liam and Elijah and Noah and Jayden. WT THE F WHO THE F DOES THE NAMING OF THE CHILDS LIKE THESE? Do you wish for the child of you to live with the wedgie by someone else who also mocks the name of these. For the example you are born in Colorado and have the Liam but move to Pennsylvania where suddenly the child of you is being bullied by the boy named Mason. Do they see the irony of this? No they do not. Mason does not realize that he is also the jokings of the person.

So I have given to you one side and then also to you the other side. What is the opinion of you the Fark.com website? If you were to be the judgings of this then who would be provided to you by being the side which has correction?

Also it should be said by me that you are welcome.
2013-09-22 05:31:54 PM
1 votes:
benzeknees.files.wordpress.com

Should not have named her TooMuchTequila, then?...
2013-09-22 03:15:32 PM
1 votes:
When I was in high school, I once took a french class that had a total of 9 students, and 4 of us were named Jason. I'm not sure where I'm going with this, but if I ever have a son his name will be Hercules. If you're going to name your kid after an ancient Greek hero, you might as well go all the way.

I have recently come around to liking alternate spellings of common names. I recently met a girl named Aarica, and I'm absolutely terrible with names, but I always remember hers. The weird spelling acts as a sort of mnemonic.
2013-09-22 02:15:25 PM
1 votes:

Dow Jones and the Temple of Doom: sirbissel: eas81: Tegan Preslay

That's Teagan-- and by the time that'd make any difference, she'll probably be out of the business anyway. (And really, if you stopped naming kids after porn stars, we'd have to drop Rachel, Kelly, Naomi, Ava, Megan, Angelina, Nina, Sarah, Jenny, Katie, Nicole, Amy, Kimberly, April, etc...)

Teagan is a really horrible, trendy name to name your kid. It's not going to age well.


1.bp.blogspot.com



She was one of my favorite of the Dr's companions
2013-09-22 02:14:13 PM
1 votes:
Just think, in 20 years strippers will have stage names like Nancy, Cathy, Mary, Sheila...
2013-09-22 02:11:25 PM
1 votes:
Presumably those Florida Jaydens and Isabellas will grow up and have kids together named Jisabella, which would be a FANTASTIC stripper/porn name.
2013-09-22 01:31:47 PM
1 votes:

12349876: meat0918: I wonder though if we'll see "unique" spellings like Burbura

Ba'abaarrau


tanar'ri
2013-09-22 01:29:39 PM
1 votes:
We named our oldest son Calvin, partly because Mrs Taylor said that 'Hobbes' was a non-starter.  And nothing rhymes with Calvin, so that'll help get him through jr high.
2013-09-22 01:27:08 PM
1 votes:

eas81: jaytkay: fark all the morans using names from movies.

The Irish ones suck, too, unless you're from Ireland.

[i758.photobucket.com image 750x600]


If you're so confused, you're a leprechaun speaking Scots, I'd imagine it'd be a good idea to remove your child naming rights altogether.
2013-09-22 01:19:23 PM
1 votes:
One thing I noticed, its hard to pick a boys name. I'm tempted to test the Freakonomics opinion and let Fark decide.
2013-09-22 01:10:01 PM
1 votes:
One of my husband's cousins named their kids. Kobra-Lee, Viper-Ray, Angel-Rue, Diamond-Jubilee, and Christian Jacob. Can you tell when they grew-up and started going all churchy. LOL. As a side note my niece just had a kid early this year and named him Liam, so this map was right! LOL
2013-09-22 01:09:08 PM
1 votes:

Dow Jones and the Temple of Doom: Seacop: I've got an Ava and an Emma. Unoriginal I guess. I don't really care.

I have a nephew named "Bradock Outlaw"

Ill never understand why people choose such shiatty, trendy names for their kids. Ava, Emma, seriously? I bet you have stainless steel appliances and drive a mid-sized SUV, too.


My kids are 9 and 7. I don't know if we hit the trend or not. Hmm. But I do drive a midsize SUV and my coffee pot and toaster are stainless steel.

Saul T. Balzac: Seacop: I've got an Ava and an Emma. Unoriginal I guess. I don't really care.


I know a couple in South Carolina with an Ava and an Emma.  Is that you?


Nope.

Babbs: Seacop: I've got an Ava and an Emma. Unoriginal I guess. I don't really care.

I have a nephew named "Bradock Outlaw"

But at least Ava and Emma are pretty names. Your nephew's name? WAT. My niece named her kid "Briar". WTF?


I tolod my sister if I have a boy I'm naming him Ninja Copkilla
2013-09-22 01:05:44 PM
1 votes:

Dow Jones and the Temple of Doom: sirbissel: eas81: Tegan Preslay

That's Teagan-- and by the time that'd make any difference, she'll probably be out of the business anyway. (And really, if you stopped naming kids after porn stars, we'd have to drop Rachel, Kelly, Naomi, Ava, Megan, Angelina, Nina, Sarah, Jenny, Katie, Nicole, Amy, Kimberly, April, etc...)

Teagan is a really horrible, trendy name to name your kid. It's not going to age well.


It's better than Jovanka ;) And it's Tegan. And I'm not really seeing how it's particularly trendy: The internet says it broke into the top 1,000 names in 1999, and as of 2007 there were a good 400 more popular names, and it's not especially new since there've been "Tegan"s since at least the 1850s.
2013-09-22 12:57:44 PM
1 votes:

jcmjx: You think these names are weird, but I'd like to see a list of most popular inner-city names.


Same names, but prefixed with "De" and "Ta" and with random apostrophes thrown in.
2013-09-22 12:49:22 PM
1 votes:
Whenever I hear white people make fun of black people's names I think of Jayden... and Caitlyn, Kaitlynn, Kaitlinn, Kaytlynn, Kaytlin, and Caytliynn.
2013-09-22 12:41:45 PM
1 votes:
Saul T. Balzac:
Funny thing about her class, though: a full 50% of the class have names that begin with the letter "A".  Way weird.

You start one page one of the "Baby Book" name, and before you know it, you're so over it you say "screw it" and name the stupid kid Amber.
2013-09-22 12:37:54 PM
1 votes:
Obviously no love for DeTangelo, EpiDoral or Sinutab
2013-09-22 12:29:07 PM
1 votes:
No Katniss?
 
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