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(Mother Nature Network)   Not that anybody around here would be interested, but NASA is ready to pay people $18,000 just to be professional couch potatoes   (mnn.com) divider line 31
    More: Spiffy, NASA, bone density, vital signs  
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31 Comments   (+0 »)
   
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2013-09-22 02:44:52 AM
Sorry, I'm not looking for a pay cut.
 
2013-09-22 08:30:16 AM
"Before racing to fill out an application, keep in mind that you actually have to be in decent shape to qualify. "

Forget it farkers, You are not getting this gig.
 
2013-09-22 08:51:14 AM
I know lots of people who do this for free.
 
2013-09-22 08:53:05 AM
I'd do it, but someone has to take the kids to school.
 
2013-09-22 08:55:00 AM
Sorry, but that job would bore the absolute shiat out of me.  70 hours, maybe.  70 days, not a chance.
 
2013-09-22 08:55:12 AM

sammyk: "Before racing to fill out an application, keep in mind that you actually have to be in decent shape to qualify. "

Forget it farkers, You are not getting this gig.


Yeah, but look at the guys i the pic, they're not piles of cookie dough, but they don't look ultra-fit to me.
 
2013-09-22 08:55:34 AM
Repeat?
 
2013-09-22 09:01:26 AM
Can I bring my iPad & post to Fark? In that case sign me up.
 
2013-09-22 09:01:56 AM
16 hours a day of internet use? Hell no, that would cut into my porn time.
 
2013-09-22 09:12:22 AM
What if they all played on a single minecraft server?
 
2013-09-22 09:12:24 AM
dammit ... US residents only, and it'll be a cold day in hell before PM Harper gets behind anything science related
 
2013-09-22 09:18:40 AM
They're gonna have to deal with some nasty bed sores.
 
2013-09-22 09:20:25 AM
Not anywhere near enough money.

I suppose if you had some long term unemployed persons, this could work for them.  Or all those people I keep hearing about with doctorates in 18th century German poetry and $100+K in student loans who can't find a job.

If you only count the 16 waking hours a day as work, you are still only making about $16/hr.
 
2013-09-22 09:22:16 AM
That works out to more than 7k a month for 70 days "work".  Sounds great, but TFA says candidates have to already be pretty healthy at the start, so that knocks most Farkers right out of the running.
 
2013-09-22 09:29:53 AM

leevis: They're gonna have to deal with some nasty bed sores.


That was my first thought too. I'm not sure if 18,000 is worth a limb.
 
2013-09-22 09:32:13 AM

Bucky Katt: Sorry, I'm not looking for a pay cut.


You make more than $18,000?  (whistles) Wow, you must be one of them thar rockerfellars.
 
2013-09-22 09:49:41 AM
Should've timed it better with the release of GTA V.
 
2013-09-22 09:52:08 AM
Heck, 10+ hours makes my back hurt so bad I need ibuprofen to move.

i911.photobucket.com

Not nearly enough money for 70 days of agony.
 
2013-09-22 09:59:26 AM
The study requires subjects to stay in bed 24/7, with their bodies tilted head down at a sixty degree angle.

Yeah, pooping is going to be a problem.
 
WGJ
2013-09-22 10:11:34 AM
Is beer included?
 
2013-09-22 10:13:22 AM
I'm in. Sounds like a great opportunity for me.
 
2013-09-22 10:14:43 AM
Would be interesting if they'd let you get up to use the bathroom, but I don't think pooping in bed sounds appealing. You could probably get someone who was working on an online degree to do it, but I'm thinking a 60 degree angle for 70 days wouldn't be good for your brain.
 
2013-09-22 10:21:48 AM

leevis: They're gonna have to deal with some nasty bed sores.


I'm guessing they'll either flip you around or otherwise try to keep those from happening. Of course you'll still have massive muscle atrophy, bone density loss and other issues. Probably losing some life expectancy as a result.
 
2013-09-22 10:22:40 AM

jeffowl: Not anywhere near enough money.

I suppose if you had some long term unemployed persons, this could work for them.  Or all those people I keep hearing about with doctorates in 18th century German poetry and $100+K in student loans who can't find a job.

If you only count the 16 waking hours a day as work, you are still only making about $16/hr.


This.

I might subject myself to that torture and health issues for something in the six figure range.
 
2013-09-22 10:26:57 AM
70 days lying down? fark that, it would take a hell of a lot more money to do that to myself.
 
2013-09-22 10:27:21 AM
Geez, no farking way would I do this. I have been bed-ridden in a hospital for 2 weeks and I wanted to die. No thanks.
 
2013-09-22 10:31:40 AM
So, while I was learning ATC it turned out that one of the cohort, who tends bar at a nice sushi joint because the whole ATC thing was a scam, had done a previous study like this. They had him in bed playing on a Playstation for weeks, but had him so some kind of running rig for 90 minutes a day. At the end, he said, his muscle mass had leaped but his bone density was way down.

At $9k a month? Let me empty out the fridge and prepay the rent first.
 
2013-09-22 10:32:48 AM
 
TWX
2013-09-22 10:32:53 AM
If they'd get around to building that rotating space station that has been dreamed of since the fifties, this wouldn't be much of a problem.

They could even build a Mars-going spacecraft that separates the crew travel compartment from the planetary landing and materials compartment by some considerable distance by a cable, so the whole ship could rotate about its center of mass once it's up to speed for its journey...
 
2013-09-22 10:36:29 AM
"'Couch potatoes' is not an accurate description for what we are looking for. Subjects need to be very healthy," said NASA's news chief, Kelly Humphries to Forbes.

Was going to sign my wife up till I read that part.
 
2013-09-22 10:39:51 AM

sammyk: "Before racing to fill out an application, keep in mind that you actually have to be in decent shape to qualify. "

Forget it farkers, You are not getting this gig.


Fat Holocaust!!!
 
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