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(The Onion)   Jaws: the story of a deeply closeted policeman whose homosexual urges manifest themselves as a giant killer shark   (theonion.com) divider line 15
    More: Amusing, shark attacks, jaws, Film criticism, gays and lesbians  
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1778 clicks; posted to Video » on 20 Sep 2013 at 4:03 PM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



15 Comments   (+0 »)
   
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest
 
2013-09-20 02:03:01 PM  
that was awesome.
 
2013-09-20 02:19:55 PM  
If you watch 'Jaws' backwards it's a movie about a shark that keeps throwing up people until they have to open a beach.

/oblig
 
2013-09-20 02:34:08 PM  

FlashHarry: that was awesome.


indeed!
 
2013-09-20 02:50:36 PM  
Those farkers stole my film school thesis!
 
2013-09-20 03:06:06 PM  
Jaws is one of my all time favorite movies, and I get irrationally angry when I find out one of my friends hasn't seen it.

Oh, and on-topic: that was hilarious.

"It's all psychological."

"Come on Chief, this isn't no boy scout picnic. See ya' got ya' rubbers!"

"I got no spit"

"This shark, swallow you whole."

"Little brown eel comes out of the cave... Swims into the hole... Comes out of the hole... Goes back into the cave again... It's not too good is it Chief?"

"I think that I am familiar with the fact that you are going to ignore this particular problem until it swims up and BITES YOU ON THE ASS!"
 
2013-09-20 03:13:23 PM  
This doesn't explain why there is still a homicidal shark, after Chief Brody has died, in Jaws 4: The Quickening.
 
2013-09-20 03:16:27 PM  
Man, my closeted homosexuality just manifests itself as personal ads on Craigslist.  I feel so unambitious now
 
2013-09-20 03:34:16 PM  

Car_Ramrod: Jaws is one of my all time favorite movies, and I get irrationally angry when I find out one of my friends hasn't seen it.

Oh, and on-topic: that was hilarious.

"It's all psychological."

"Come on Chief, this isn't no boy scout picnic. See ya' got ya' rubbers!"

"I got no spit"

"This shark, swallow you whole."

"Little brown eel comes out of the cave... Swims into the hole... Comes out of the hole... Goes back into the cave again... It's not too good is it Chief?"

"I think that I am familiar with the fact that you are going to ignore this particular problem until it swims up and BITES YOU ON THE ASS!"


Quint: Pump it out, Chief!
 
2013-09-20 04:19:37 PM  

Lor M. Ipsum: Man, my closeted homosexuality just manifests itself as personal ads on Craigslist.  I feel so unambitious now


i larfed
 
2013-09-20 04:22:09 PM  

HighOnCraic: Car_Ramrod: Jaws is one of my all time favorite movies, and I get irrationally angry when I find out one of my friends hasn't seen it.

Oh, and on-topic: that was hilarious.

"It's all psychological."

"Come on Chief, this isn't no boy scout picnic. See ya' got ya' rubbers!"

"I got no spit"

"This shark, swallow you whole."

"Little brown eel comes out of the cave... Swims into the hole... Comes out of the hole... Goes back into the cave again... It's not too good is it Chief?"

"I think that I am familiar with the fact that you are going to ignore this particular problem until it swims up and BITES YOU ON THE ASS!"

Quint: Pump it out, Chief!


that. was. awesome.
 
2013-09-20 06:54:03 PM  
I can't remember when the Amusing tag was more horribly misused. That was f*cking pathetically UNamusing.
 
2013-09-20 07:33:10 PM  
media.avclub.com
 
2013-09-20 08:45:08 PM  
The Onion needs to stop reviewing movies, they completely suck at it.
 
2013-09-21 08:37:08 AM  

ReapTheChaos: The Onion needs to stop reviewing movies, they completely suck at it.




Maybe they should review, reviews, like you do so entertainingly.
 
2013-09-21 09:07:24 AM  

ReapTheChaos: The Onion needs to stop reviewing movies, they completely suck at it.


you mean you don't get the homoerotic subtext of Jaws?
 
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