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(WTKR)   A Virginia dentist will see her felony charge dropped under one condition: She has to agree to not spank her child for at least two years   (wtkr.com) divider line 216
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6303 clicks; posted to Main » on 20 Sep 2013 at 9:10 AM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2013-09-20 07:46:29 AM  
I wouldn't go to her for dental work for the next couple of years.

www.alicia-logic.com
 
2013-09-20 07:58:11 AM  
In a row?
 
2013-09-20 09:14:07 AM  
Watch out for the "What's wrong with spanking?" brigade! - "I was spanked, and I turned out fine!"

I worked with a guy of the opinion "I was spanked, and I turned out fine!" - he was divorced, morbidly obese, had partial custody rights of his kid, smoked, and had a crappy job. Yes, he turned out fine.
 
2013-09-20 09:14:49 AM  
Is it safe?
 
2013-09-20 09:15:09 AM  
Do I get to chose which two years? How about 2035 and 2067?
 
2013-09-20 09:15:40 AM  
I used to get it with a belt from good old dad when I was growing up.
I'm not that fond of my father.
Spanking is not a bad form of discipline. But how it's administered makes a big difference.
 
2013-09-20 09:19:38 AM  
Mom???
 
2013-09-20 09:21:37 AM  
The key words were bruises left to be seen days later.  No bruises, scratches or bite marks, or you'll be getting a matching pair of metal bracelets.
 
2013-09-20 09:23:10 AM  
Actual conversation overheard at friend's house:

kid: "Daddy, if I draw on the wall, will I get Time Out?"
dad: "yes."
kid: "OK!" (child lamely draws on wall, hardly a mark is made, as child stares at his father)
dad: "you're in time out."
kid: "yay!  I wanted to be by myself."

Shortly thereafter they started to include the threat of spanking.  I'm sure the child will now grow up to become a heroin addict with gentleman's bladder and a stutter.
 
2013-09-20 09:23:32 AM  
Next time use the shock collar on the kid.   Doesn't leave noticeable marks
 
2013-09-20 09:24:05 AM  
Just think of all the crap the kid's going to get away with now.   Lucky bastard.
 
2013-09-20 09:25:38 AM  
Child retaliates against the belt for the next 2 years by driving dear mom to a crying, cringing, rolled up in a corner and rocking back and forth, mess.  Forget hyperactivity or worse ADHD.  This is war
 
2013-09-20 09:26:38 AM  

Literally Addicted: Just think of all the crap the kid's going to get away with now.   Lucky bastard.


until two years is up, then it better run
 
2013-09-20 09:32:26 AM  
So basically the deal is, we won't prosecute you if you agree to raise your children so they will become little thugs and be in the juvenile system until they are old enough for us to ship them off to prison.  Sounds fair to me.
 
2013-09-20 09:35:29 AM  

jwa007: So basically the deal is, we won't prosecute you if you agree to raise your children so they will become little thugs and be in the juvenile system until they are old enough for us to ship them off to prison. Sounds fair to me.


Dude, spanking leads to more antisocial behavior in children. Spanking doesn't prevent kids from becoming thugs. It actually increases the likelihood that they WILL become thugs.
 
2013-09-20 09:37:00 AM  

guytoronto: Watch out for the "What's wrong with spanking?" brigade! - "I was spanked, and I turned out fine!"

I worked with a guy of the opinion "I was spanked, and I turned out fine!" - he was divorced, morbidly obese, had partial custody rights of his kid, smoked, and had a crappy job. Yes, he turned out fine.


I'm sure that all of that was a direct result of the severe psychological harm he suffered by being spanked by his parents.

Fark parenting threads are always a trainwreck. They are, however, a great place to go to get expert parenting advice from childless people in their teens or 20's.
 
2013-09-20 09:37:09 AM  
I was about to be al outraged, but a belt is over the line. Spankings should always be administered with an open-palm hand.

My mom used a wooden spoon on us. And unlike the comment above I DID turn out fine (not overweight, don't smoke, good job, etc.). Also, I love my parents and we hang out all the time to watch movies, football, or play games. The spankings were more of a young kid thing. They stopped in first grade when I was finally old enough to be upset when the punishment was not going to a friends house or having something taken away.
 
2013-09-20 09:39:01 AM  

guytoronto: Watch out for the "What's wrong with spanking?" brigade! - "I was spanked, and I turned out fine!"

I worked with a guy of the opinion "I was spanked, and I turned out fine!" - he was divorced, morbidly obese, had partial custody rights of his kid, smoked, and had a crappy job. Yes, he turned out fine.


Your anecdotal evidence of how one guy who you assume was spanked turned out is enough for me!
 
2013-09-20 09:40:10 AM  
I wish I could commit assault and walk by pinky swearing not to do it again.
 
2013-09-20 09:46:14 AM  

guytoronto: jwa007: So basically the deal is, we won't prosecute you if you agree to raise your children so they will become little thugs and be in the juvenile system until they are old enough for us to ship them off to prison. Sounds fair to me.

Dude, spanking leads to more antisocial behavior in children. Spanking doesn't prevent kids from becoming thugs. It actually increases the likelihood that they WILL become thugs.



More cited evidence. Look, there are times when punishment isn't enough and you have to get physical. I can count on one hand how many times I've given my son a pants-around-the-ankles, over my knee spanking. Once because he wandered off outside and ended up three blocks away from where he was allowed to be and another when he raised his voice to his mother. He's a very well-adjusted 10 year old. He plays some violin. He's a captain on his football team (ranked #5 in the stats of MD, BTW *proud dad*). He's an honor roll student .He hasn't been destroyed psychologically because he was disciplined. He's been helped.
 
2013-09-20 09:48:37 AM  
I think teaching young children to expect abuse from people who supposedly love them is a great idea and cannot imagine this ever turning out badly.
 
2013-09-20 09:49:44 AM  
We all know that it is spanking and spanking alone that determines the future potential of a child.  Environment, economics, friends, parenting, etc. have absolutely no part in this equation.  Can it be excessive?  Absolutely.  Will the complete absence of it guarantee that your child grows up to be a well adjusted adult?  Nope.  We might as well debate what shade of blue is the best one.
 
2013-09-20 09:51:16 AM  
I have no comment on the spanking per se, however I do believe the child is a pawn in an ongoing child custody case. Which is more harmful?
 
2013-09-20 09:51:44 AM  
Affa two year up that chil' gonna geeeeet it!
 
2013-09-20 09:53:15 AM  

farm machine: We all know that it is spanking and spanking alone that determines the future potential of a child.  Environment, economics, friends, parenting, etc. have absolutely no part in this equation.  Can it be excessive?  Absolutely.  Will the complete absence of it guarantee that your child grows up to be a well adjusted adult?  Nope.  We might as well debate what shade of blue is the best one.


Whether or not to vaccinate is also a key predictor.  Unvaccinated, unspanked kids grow up to be highly successful despite their sterility and measles pock marks.
 
2013-09-20 09:53:50 AM  

starsrift: I think teaching young children to expect abuse from people who supposedly love them is a great idea and cannot imagine this ever turning out badly.


There's a difference between spanking and abuse.  It's a pretty wide margin.

There is also nothing wrong with kids having fear of consequences of their actions and having a healthy respect for parents' authority.  Parents are to teach, guide (yes, love too), but mainly prepare their children for a life away from them eventually.
 
2013-09-20 09:54:33 AM  

starsrift: I think teaching young children to expect abuse from people who supposedly love them is a great idea and cannot imagine this ever turning out badly.


3/10...you'll get some bites
 
2013-09-20 09:55:08 AM  
If the mom doesn't hit, you must acquit?
 
2013-09-20 09:56:12 AM  

farm machine: We all know that it is spanking and spanking alone that determines the future potential of a child.  Environment, economics, friends, parenting, etc. have absolutely no part in this equation.  Can it be excessive?  Absolutely.  Will the complete absence of it guarantee that your child grows up to be a well adjusted adult?  Nope.  We might as well debate what shade of blue is the best one.


PERIWINKLE!
 
2013-09-20 09:57:21 AM  

starsrift: I think teaching young children to expect abuse from people who supposedly love them is a great idea and cannot imagine this ever turning out badly.


Whenever I see a parent who is unable to control their little bastard who is flipping out in the aisle at Walmart I always think to myself, "that kid is going to be somebody".
 
2013-09-20 09:57:28 AM  
Durrant, Joan E. (2000). "Trends in Youth Crime and Well-Being Since the Abolition of Corporal Punishment in Sweden", Youth and Society. Youth and Society, Volume 31, 437-455.

Gershoff, Elizabeth (2002) "Corporal Punishment by Parents and Associated Child Behaviors and Experiences: A Meta-Analytic and Theoretical Review", Psychological Bulletin 2002. Vol. 128, No. 4 539-579. American Psychological Association.

Greven, Philip. (1992). Spare the Rod: The religious roots of punishment and the psychological impact of physical abuse. Vintage Books.

Miller, Alice. (1990) For your own good: Hidden cruelty in child-rearing and roots of violence. Farrar, Straus & Giroux, LLC.

Straus, M.A., Sugarman, D.B., & Giles-Sims (1997). "Corporal punishment by parents and subsequent antisocial behavior in children". Archives of Pediatrics and Adolescent Medicine, 155, 761-767.

Straus, M.A., & Gelles, R.J. (Eds.). (1990) "Physical violence in American families: Risk factors and adaptions to violence in 8,145 families". New Brunswick, NJ: Transactions.

Straus, M.A. (1994). Beating the devil out of them: Corporal punishment in American families. San Francisco, CA: New Lexington Press.

Strassberg, Z., Dodge, K.A., Pettit, G.S., & Bates, J.E. (1994). "Spanking in families and subsequent aggressive behavior toward peers by kindergarten students". Development and Psychopathology, 6, 445-461.

Wolfe, D.A. (1987). Child abuse: Implications for child development and psychopathology . Newbury Park, CA: Sage
 
2013-09-20 09:57:31 AM  
Swift, consistent discipline. no idle threats.
whether it be a spanking (not a beating... there is a difference), removal of toys/privileges, or something else... once that kid figures out that you're non-committal in your rules and the penalties for breaking them, that kid will walk all over you.

sending your kid to his/her room with video games, computer, tv, etc is not punishment.
 
2013-09-20 09:59:06 AM  

Literally Addicted: starsrift: I think teaching young children to expect abuse from people who supposedly love them is a great idea and cannot imagine this ever turning out badly.

There's a difference between spanking and abuse.  It's a pretty wide margin.

There is also nothing wrong with kids having fear of consequences of their actions and having a healthy respect for parents' authority.  Parents are to teach, guide (yes, love too), but mainly prepare their children for a life away from them eventually.


Explain to us the difference then o wise one. Exactly what conditions transform hitting someone from abuse into spank.
 
2013-09-20 10:00:46 AM  

guytoronto: jwa007: So basically the deal is, we won't prosecute you if you agree to raise your children so they will become little thugs and be in the juvenile system until they are old enough for us to ship them off to prison. Sounds fair to me.

Dude, spanking leads to more antisocial behavior in children. Spanking doesn't prevent kids from becoming thugs. It actually increases the likelihood that they WILL become thugs.


upload.wikimedia.org
 
2013-09-20 10:03:14 AM  

Ned Stark: Literally Addicted: starsrift: I think teaching young children to expect abuse from people who supposedly love them is a great idea and cannot imagine this ever turning out badly.

There's a difference between spanking and abuse.  It's a pretty wide margin.

There is also nothing wrong with kids having fear of consequences of their actions and having a healthy respect for parents' authority.  Parents are to teach, guide (yes, love too), but mainly prepare their children for a life away from them eventually.

Explain to us the difference then o wise one. Exactly what conditions transform hitting someone from abuse into spank.


According to anti-spanking experts, there IS a difference.

"Physical abuse is characterized by the infliction of physical injury as a result of punching, beating, kicking, biting, burning, shaking or otherwise harming a child. The parent or caretaker may not have intended to hurt the child, rather the injury may have resulted from
over-discipline or physical punishment. (What Are the Main Types of Maltreatment? section, para. 2) Behaviors that do not result in significant physical injury (e.g., spank, slap) are considered corporal punishment, whereas behaviors that risk injury (e.g., punching, kicking, burning) are considered
physical abuse. " -  http://www.apa.org/pubs/journals/releases/bul-1284539.pdf
 
2013-09-20 10:03:44 AM  

DROxINxTHExWIND: guytoronto: jwa007: So basically the deal is, we won't prosecute you if you agree to raise your children so they will become little thugs and be in the juvenile system until they are old enough for us to ship them off to prison. Sounds fair to me.

Dude, spanking leads to more antisocial behavior in children. Spanking doesn't prevent kids from becoming thugs. It actually increases the likelihood that they WILL become thugs.


More cited evidence. Look, there are times when punishment isn't enough and you have to get physical. I can count on one hand how many times I've given my son a pants-around-the-ankles, over my knee spanking. Once because he wandered off outside and ended up three blocks away from where he was allowed to be and another when he raised his voice to his mother. He's a very well-adjusted 10 year old. He plays some violin. He's a captain on his football team (ranked #5 in the stats of MD, BTW *proud dad*). He's an honor roll student .He hasn't been destroyed psychologically because he was disciplined. He's been helped.


Give it up. You're arguing with people who think they know better than the entirety of human history, and most of them have no children of their own.

I am in agreement with you. I can't recall the last time I had to physically discipline my kids (ages 12 and 10 now); maybe when the oldest was 6 or 7? If you discipline firmly and early, spanking goes away as a necessary tool and becomes merely a firm reminder that there's another, unpleasant, level of consequence for bad behavior.
 
2013-09-20 10:05:35 AM  
i1143.photobucket.com
 
2013-09-20 10:06:06 AM  

another cultural observer: farm machine: We all know that it is spanking and spanking alone that determines the future potential of a child.  Environment, economics, friends, parenting, etc. have absolutely no part in this equation.  Can it be excessive?  Absolutely.  Will the complete absence of it guarantee that your child grows up to be a well adjusted adult?  Nope.  We might as well debate what shade of blue is the best one.

Whether or not to vaccinate is also a key predictor.  Unvaccinated, unspanked kids grow up to be highly successful despite their sterility and measles pock marks.


Despite? Or because of?
 
2013-09-20 10:06:30 AM  

Ned Stark: Literally Addicted: starsrift: I think teaching young children to expect abuse from people who supposedly love them is a great idea and cannot imagine this ever turning out badly.

There's a difference between spanking and abuse.  It's a pretty wide margin.

There is also nothing wrong with kids having fear of consequences of their actions and having a healthy respect for parents' authority.  Parents are to teach, guide (yes, love too), but mainly prepare their children for a life away from them eventually.

Explain to us the difference then o wise one. Exactly what conditions transform hitting someone from abuse into spank.


Um...if you don't know the difference, perhaps parenting isn't for you.  If you can't figure out that using an object to flail at your young child is abuse - then wear multiple condoms every time.
 
2013-09-20 10:13:04 AM  
Kid better run when September 2015 rolls around because Momma's gonna have a few things saved up to teach him.
 
2013-09-20 10:13:48 AM  
I've spanked my oldest son once. It was a one-time whack on the butt, for him being exceptionally disrespectful towards his mama.

Ever since then, I've never needed to do anything physical. Just explain what the consequences will be if his behavior doesn't change, and get him to agree that "we don't want that".

If it would get you arrested for doing it to an adult, you should think twice before you do it to a child. That's my hippy opinion.
 
gja [TotalFark]
2013-09-20 10:15:39 AM  

DROxINxTHExWIND: starsrift: I think teaching young children to expect abuse from people who supposedly love them is a great idea and cannot imagine this ever turning out badly.

Whenever I see a parent who is unable to control their little bastard who is flipping out in the aisle at Walmart I always think to myself, "that kid is going to be somebody".


^THIS^
My daughter (8 now) has gotten a spanking for only 2 things that very nearly parallel what DROx administered his for.
She is on track to be a VERY good scholar, she is quite bright, very sweet, very well adjusted and a loving, open person.

Children need structure. They need limits. They look to us to show them what is right/wrong. They adopt values from those raising them (parents or whomever).
Absent of good, solid values and limits they will simply keep pushing the limits until they come to a place and time a "hard stop" is administered.

Do you really want you child to find this limit from someone who does not care about them as a person? Who has no vested interest in their well-being, nor any love for them?

Even my daughter comments quietly to me when we witness a little brat throwing a tantrum in public and see the parents do NOTHING. Except maybe drag them along by their arm.

Eventually your little snowflake will head off into the world on their own. If they have not learned from you that "some things will get you a punch in the mouth" via a much more gentle and measured corporal punishment then they just may receive said lesson via an all-out beat-down session.
Is that REALLY how you want them to learn limits?

HINT: a spank does not really hurt or leave marks, it is more as a show of discipline and to make a point. Pain should not be involved. Knowing they disappointed you or did wrong is.
 
2013-09-20 10:16:16 AM  

Literally Addicted: Ned Stark: Literally Addicted: starsrift: I think teaching young children to expect abuse from people who supposedly love them is a great idea and cannot imagine this ever turning out badly.

There's a difference between spanking and abuse.  It's a pretty wide margin.

There is also nothing wrong with kids having fear of consequences of their actions and having a healthy respect for parents' authority.  Parents are to teach, guide (yes, love too), but mainly prepare their children for a life away from them eventually.

Explain to us the difference then o wise one. Exactly what conditions transform hitting someone from abuse into spank.

Um...if you don't know the difference, perhaps parenting isn't for you.  If you can't figure out that using an object to flail at your young child is abuse - then wear multiple condoms every time.


I very much can tell that taking a swing at a child is abuse. I'm wondering what conditions and rituals you think make it OK since there are evidently some. Throwing up you're hands in outrage and yelling "OF COURSE ITS DIFFERENT!" is not an acceptable answer.
 
2013-09-20 10:18:54 AM  
Quick question. How many people in here who are opposed to spanking have children of their own?

Just curious.
 
2013-09-20 10:18:59 AM  
+1 for against spanking of children

im not saying anything about anyone, before i drown in a torrent of abuse from mummies and daddlies, im just against
 
gja [TotalFark]
2013-09-20 10:21:08 AM  

Ned Stark: Literally Addicted: Ned Stark: Literally Addicted: starsrift: I think teaching young children to expect abuse from people who supposedly love them is a great idea and cannot imagine this ever turning out badly.

There's a difference between spanking and abuse.  It's a pretty wide margin.

There is also nothing wrong with kids having fear of consequences of their actions and having a healthy respect for parents' authority.  Parents are to teach, guide (yes, love too), but mainly prepare their children for a life away from them eventually.

Explain to us the difference then o wise one. Exactly what conditions transform hitting someone from abuse into spank.

Um...if you don't know the difference, perhaps parenting isn't for you.  If you can't figure out that using an object to flail at your young child is abuse - then wear multiple condoms every time.

I very much can tell that taking a swing at a child is abuse. I'm wondering what conditions and rituals you think make it OK since there are evidently some. Throwing up you're hands in outrage and yelling "OF COURSE ITS DIFFERENT!" is not an acceptable answer.


Read my post above yours. If you cannot see the difference as I described you are either being willfully obtuse or intellectually dishonest.
 
2013-09-20 10:22:13 AM  

Gonz: I've spanked my oldest son once. It was a one-time whack on the butt, for him being exceptionally disrespectful towards his mama.

Ever since then, I've never needed to do anything physical. Just explain what the consequences will be if his behavior doesn't change, and get him to agree that "we don't want that".

If it would get you arrested for doing it to an adult, you should think twice before you do it to a child. That's my hippy opinion.


this.
 
2013-09-20 10:22:29 AM  

guytoronto: Watch out for the "What's wrong with spanking?" brigade! - "I was spanked, and I turned out fine!"

I worked with a guy of the opinion "I was spanked, and I turned out fine!" - he was divorced, morbidly obese, had partial custody rights of his kid, smoked, and had a crappy job. Yes, he turned out fine.


LOOK AT HOW FINE I TURNED OUT! LOOK AT ME!
www.tableflippin.com
 
2013-09-20 10:23:11 AM  
I refuse to spank my children, even when they act way out of line and they are very well behaved.  The key is to teach them that there are consequences for acting like a sub par human being and those don't need to come with beatings.  My kids know that if they act out, they will be in the dog house.  And by dog house i literally mean the crate in the basement.
 
2013-09-20 10:23:46 AM  
I spanked my then 5 year old the one day he was hitting his brother and the little shiat laughed afterward, that's when I realized I wasn't spanking hard enough and on bare skin.  Won't make that mistake again.
 
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